Broken Pasts (9 page)

CHAPTER 10

I
had never imagined that a man could look so good in a red bowling
shirt.

I
tried to keep my gaze respectful as Nathaniel opened the back door
for Rhea and I to climb out of the car.

“
Hey
there, who's – ” Jamie paused, one hand on the door of
her red convertible, the other frozen in midair like she'd forgotten
what she was doing. “Dear god, Mr. Sutherland. You make me
ashamed to be a married woman.”

“
Hey,
I'm standing right here, remember?” her husband, Joel, called
out from beside his blue minivan. Boys exploded out of it in a sea
of raging hormones, kicking and punching one another as they
scrambled for the door. I was pleased to see that Rhea joined right
in with them, not at all averse to punching, kicking, or, I cringed,
biting
to be one of the first ones to enter the bowling alley.

“
Your
family's a terrible influence,” I said to Jamie as I tried to
distract her from Nathaniel's jean clad, b
owling
shirt wearing form. If I had thought the black slacks looked good,
the jeans were even better. He'd brought them in from his car and
slipped them on while I'd had my back turned. The urge to glance
over my shoulder and check him out had been overwhelming, but I'd
resisted. Still, the information he'd shared with me about his wife
had piqued my interest, not diminished it.
The
mystery's been solved, Theresa.
But
somehow, deep down, I knew it wasn't. Until Nathaniel Sutherland was
open and all his soul was bared for me to see, I wouldn't be
satisfied. I knew. I just knew it.

“
Joel
MacMillan, this is Nathaniel Sutherland,” I announced as
Jamie's husband came up to stand beside us. The fiery redhead held
out his hand as I glanced over at my friend. She touched her chin
and shook her head gently, sending the Mardi Gras beads she'd braided
into her hair flying. They were purple and green, the perfect match
to her bowling shirt and her team name,
The
Barney Killers
.
I swallowed, forced a smile and
continued as the two men shook hands. “My boyfriend.”
Joel's brows rose quickly and he tightened his lips as if he was
holding back a laugh. He had just helped set me up with his friend a
few days back. Four days later and I suddenly had a boyfriend? He
wasn't really buying it, but, being Jamie's husband, he knew better
than to say anything about it.

“
Hey,
Theresa,” Joel said as we moved to head inside. “I
really want to apologize about Stuart. From what I hear, he just
left you at the restaurant. Did you get home okay?” I nodded,
not really wanting to relive the experience. I had run back into the
building, much to the surprise of the staff, and had called for a cab
while sitting in the lobby. Gary had been standing outside the
entire time, staring in at me.

“
Just
fine,” I said. “But you might want to tell Stuart that
he really knows how to screw up a date.” I glanced over at
Nathaniel and saw that he was taking in the scenery, furtively
scanning the crowd, the employees, the people hunched over the pool
tables. Even though he was no longer wearing the suit, Nathaniel was
still very much in charge of the situation. “And please get
him to burn that khaki suit. It was horrible.”
I can't
believe I almost slept with that man,
I thought with a shiver.
He'd been handsome, but the way he'd abandoned the situation showed
me that underneath, he was as cowardly as my ex-husband, Glen.
When
things get tough, the weak go running.

“
So,
tonight's match goes like this … ” Joel began as he
licked his thumb and started paging through a notepad he'd pulled out
of his back pocket. Jamie's oldest son, Ray, already had his dad's
wallet in hand and was digging through it in search of cash.

“
Nuh-uh,”
Jamie said as she reached out and plucked the black leather away with
her freshly painted purple fingernails. “What are you trying
to buy?”

“
I
want to play the slot machines!” Ray said as he pointed to the
curtain in the back of the alley. His brown eyes were practically
bugging out of his head, obscured only by the bit of blonde curl that
was flopping into his face. “Dad promised that I could.”
Jamie rolled her eyes and threw the wallet back at him.

“
If
you get arrested,” she called after him as he took off running,
his best friend, Anthony, in tow. “Don't come crawling to me.”
Jamie turned a pointed look on Joel. “If he gets arrested …
” she started again as I caught Nathaniel's eyes and smiled.
He smiled back and I felt my heart contract painfully.

“
Are
you kidding?” Joel asked as he perused the yellow paper. “He
just hit puberty. He's as big as an ox.” Jamie rolled her
eyes and pulled a lollipop out of her purse. “Ray has more
hair on his chest than I do. I bet he could order a beer and not get
carded.”

“
Six
months,” Jamie said as she winked at me and I wrinkled my nose.
“He was already masturbating at six months. Don't tell him I
told you, though. He'll deny it.” She elbowed Nathaniel in
the side. His brows rose, but he didn't say a thing. My friends
were a bit quirky: Gary had hated them. Why hadn't I taken that as a
sign? Oh yeah, because Glen had left me an emotional wreck. I had
felt like I needed someone. Was that what I was doing with
Nathaniel, too?

“
So
tonight, it's
The Blood Suckers
,” Joel pointed at his
red and gold bowling shirt with the mosquito emblem. “Versus
The Barney Killers
for the championship.” He paused and
sat his notebook down on the table next to lanes five and six. We'd
used the same lanes every Friday night, barring holidays, for the
past seven years. I'd had my very last date with Glen here when I
was pregnant. It was full of memories, both good and bad. I had to
admit, though, that as I watched Rhea and Blaine, Jamie's youngest,
pick out their balls, that they were more good than bad. “
The
McMaster Lizards
are out, unfortunately, but they can play
winner.”

“
You
are on,” Jamie said as put her purse down and started grabbing
people to head over for shoe rentals. “Maybe Nathaniel can
save your team in the Ultimate Grandmaster Ruler of All Bowling
Championship that starts next Friday.” I flushed and tried to
jump in, convinced that she was making Nathaniel uncomfortable. But
he didn't look it, not one bit. “Want to know a secret, Mr.
Sutherland?” she whispered as Joel took Rhea and Blaine up the
carpeted stairs behind us.

“
I'd
love to.”

“
The
only reason
The McMaster Lizards
are doing so poorly this
season is because when it's just Rhea and Theresa, they have to take
turns rolling a third ball. See,” she pointed at herself.
“Ray, Anthony, and I are on a team, and Joel, Kyle, and Blaine
are on a team. And well,” she paused and bit her lip as if she
was revealing some juicy tidbit. “Rhea's a great player,
really, one of the best in our league. But Theresa … She's
never had an orgasm. It fucks up her game, just so you know.”

“
Oh,
god,” I said as I put my head in my hand and looked over at
Nathaniel. “There's a gentle adjustment period when getting to
know Jamie,” I promised as my friend walked away, winking.

“
I
like her already,” Nathaniel said, but his expression was all
for me. He was staring at me, watching me with interest and an
undisguised bit of lust. In his eyes was an intriguing glint that
went beyond our casual acquaintance. Did he feel any of the same
things for me as I did for him?
“Am I interesting to you?”
I asked, voice quiet, almost husky. There was this bit of
something
in the air, like a taste of heat, of friction. I realized then that
we were standing way too close for two people who knew nothing about
one another. I took a step back.

“
Fascinating,”
he said, but that single word had so many meanings that I was having
trouble decrypting them. I took a deep breath and glanced away.

“
Want
a beer?” I asked him and he shook his head.

“
I
might have crossed the line with you, but I'm still going to keep you
safe. Under different circumstances … ” I nodded and
put my hands on my lower back.

“
Right.
Got it. Maybe some other time?” I looked up suddenly and met
eyes that shone under the dim lights of the bowling alley like
jewels.

“
Maybe
next Friday?” he asked. I swallowed, hard. Were we making a
date? Really? Did I want to go there? Could I help myself?

“
Sure.
Want to meet here?” I asked as I tried to breathe through my
nose.

“
I
could pick you up … ” he ventured and then paused.
“That is, if you think you'll no longer be needing my services
at that time?” I bit my lip and tucked my fingers into my
pockets. I was still working under the assumption that Gary would go
away. Just leave me alone and disappear. And I couldn't ask Jamie
for more money. If I wanted Nathaniel, and Cedric, around then I was
going to have to dip into my house fund. Not happening. Gary was
not taking that dream away from me. Still …

“
I
got a lot of e-mails today,” I said. I hadn't read them. And
I didn't want to. “I don't know if this is part of your job or
not, but would you mind helping me go through them?” Nathaniel
smiled softly.

“
I'd
be happy to,” he said and there was that settling of melancholy
in his features, like he was depressed. I don't know how he did it.
If I were him, I'd have wanted to distance myself from anything that
might remind me of what had happened. Nathaniel was embroiled in it.
“Each one is a 'separate incident.' The more the better at
this point.”

“
Mom!”
Rhea called from behind me as she pounded down the steps and flashed
us her red and white bowling shoes. “Hurry up. We don't have
all day.” I laughed, feeling the tension of the moment break
and tried to smile as Nathaniel held out a hand. I paused before
taking it and then saw that Rhea's eyes were on mine, observing. I
grasped Nathaniel's fingers and swallowed two massive lungfuls of
breath. He had this touch that was both gentle and strong, the
perfect paradox.

“
I
hope you're ready,” I said as I tried to ignore Jamie's smug
look. “Because things here get pretty competitive.”

“
I
think I can handle it,” Nathaniel said as he winked at Rhea.

***

We
weren't more than an hour into the evening when Gary showed up.

I
had just bowled a seven-ten split and was aiming for a killer shot
and a very slim chance at a spare when he walked into the alley,
leather jacket over his shoulders, brown hair slicked back. I nearly
dropped the pearly pink ball on my foot. Nathaniel saw him the same
moment I did. And so did Rhea.

“
Mom,
look it's Gary!” she said as she pointed and waved. Gary
spotted her, waved back and started coming towards us. I grabbed my
daughter's hand and turned her to face me as Nathaniel moved past
Jamie and up the stairs towards the entryway.

“
Hey,
you want to help me with this?” I asked her, hoping to distract
her attention from whatever incident was going to occur in the
doorway of the bowling alley. “I think we could win the next
competition, but I need your help. What's the best way to do this
again?” Rhea sighed and turned around, reaching for her red
ball with sure fingers.

“
What
the fuck is going on?” Jamie whispered from behind me. I
shrugged my shoulders and watched as Nathaniel approached Gary. This
time, my ex didn't run, just froze in place and tucked his hands into
the pockets of his jacket. I couldn't hear what they were saying,
but I hoped to hell that there was an explanation for all of this.
Gary had lost it temporarily and he was here to apologize. That had
to be it. Had to.

“
Mom,
pay attention!” Rhea said as she stepped forward and tried to
explain the art of bowling to me. The kid was too smart for her own
good. “Listen, you have two choices. The first is to try and
get one pin to fly out of the pit and knock down the other.”
Rhea paused and pointed with her free hand. “The other is to
try and get the ball to bounce off the kickback plate and onto the
deck.” I was nodding and murmuring under my breath, but in
reality, I hadn't heard a word she had just said. Nathaniel was on
his way back. He didn't look angry or upset, but yet Gary was still
here and he was at the counter handing money to the clerk. Which
meant he wasn't leaving. Which meant …

“
What's
going on?” I asked as Rhea sighed and rolled her ball in my
place. Nathaniel looked straight at me with his pretty green eyes
and shook his head.

“
There's
nothing we can do,” he said and he looked as exasperated as I
felt. “He has every right to be here.”