Call Me Crazy (12 page)

When I finally pull back, I wipe my eyes and let out a deep, cleansing breath. There was just something freeing about telling my mother the things that I knew that only she could handle, because her love for me is unconditional.

“Are you going to tell me about her now?”

I smile and I know that it’s one of those absurd grins worn by smitten men.

“She’s beautiful, funny, and at times very shy. She has fight in her, but attempts to keep the peace before letting it lose.” It dawns on me then that my mom might have seen her because Tally was at the hospital all of the time.

“You might know her; she’s up here every day visiting her aunt. Her name is Tally and she has pink streaks in her hair. She’s pretty hard to miss.”

My mother’s face suddenly goes white and her eyes drop from mine.

“Mom what’s wrong? Are you okay?” I ask her, remembering that staying calm was very important to helping her stay calm.

She swallows and then clears her throat. I can tell that she’s trying to gather herself, but I don’t know what has unraveled her.

“Pink hair?” She smiles, though it doesn’t meet her eyes. “Yes, I have seen Tally around here. She seems sweet.”

“I’ll have to bring her to meet you.”

“I would like that. Can I tell you one more thing before you go?” The clarity that I see in her eyes and through her words is so refreshing. At that moment I could listen to her talk forever because in that moment she was my mother.

I frown at her. “Of course, you can tell me anything.”

“Every relationship has its dark times, Trey. Even your father and I had our moments. Don’t give up on her during those dark times. Take time to step back and remember the choice you made. Never, ever forget that, though initially it was attraction, infatuation, and falling in love with her that brought you together, it will be the choice to keep on loving that will get you through those dark times.”

“I’ll remember,” I tell her, and I mean it.

~

I glance at my watch and see that it is nearly noon. I’m not sure where to look for Tally so I go to the only place that I think she could be. When I reach Candy’s room
, I try to mentally prepare myself for the, no doubt, entertaining, albeit slightly embarrassing, comments. I knock on the door and then step back and wait. I hear scuffling on the other side and then the door swings open dramatically.

“Look who has finally decided to show his fine aaa…,” Candy is cut off by the voice that I have so longed to hear.

“Candy…,”

I hear the warning in Tally’s voice and wish that Candy would move so that I could see her.

“What?” Candy asks with an innocent bat of her eyes. “I’m just pointing out that Running Bull here hasn’t bothered to grace us with his presence for a while.”

Tally pushes around Candy, who gives her a dirty look and sticks her tongue out at her behind her back.

“Candy if you don’t put that tongue back in your mouth I will super glue your lips shut.”

Candy laughs. “Totally loving the snarky, though threatening, comments. I have taught you well!”

I look down at Tally and in the three days it has been since I saw her last I’m struck at how small she is. Her eyes dart from my face to the floor to the hall around me and I realize that she is nervous and unsure.

“I want to talk to you.” I see the surprise in her eyes at my bluntness and she let
s out a sharp breath when I reach for her hand and begin to gently pull her from Candy’s room. I have to stop abruptly to keep from running Candy over as she steps in front of me.

“I think it would be better for you all to sit in my room,” she says sweetly as she pushes on my chest.

“Why?”

“More privacy,” Candy retorts and pushes harder.

I look back at Tally. “She’s right.”

So I turn back towards Candy’s room and follow Tally, who has already stepped through the threshold. I hear the door close behind me but don’t bother to check if Candy has followed us.

I watch as Tally climbs up onto the bed and pushes herself until her back is against the wall. She glances up at me and then down at her hands. I’m not really sure how to open up the conversation, but she saves me the trouble.

“How’s your mom?”

The question surprises me. I had been expecting her to say something about my conversation with Candy, because I had no doubt that Candy had conveyed every detail of it to Tally.

“Today is a good day.”

She smiles. “That’s great.”

Finally I just dive in. “How was your night out?” I try very hard not to growl the question but as her eyes snap up to mine I know I have failed.

“It was eventful.” Her words drip with sarcasm and I watch her defenses go up as she folds her arms across her chest.

“What exactly does that mean?” I take a step closer.

“Why do you care?”

“Since that first day I saw you ducking behind that table you have intrigued me. And then after spending time with you, I just want more time. I want to know about you, about what you like, what you hate. I want to know what makes you smile and what causes you to have that frightened look that you sometimes get.” I’m not sure at this point if my words are going to have her throwing me out of the room, with her yelling at me for being the stalker I claimed not to be. “I like you Tally.” My mouth says the words but my heart is screaming something totally different.

“Candy said you acted like a jealous and sexy nut job. Those were her words,” she quickly explains.

“I don’t know about the sexy part, but I might have felt a little jealous.”

She raises an eyebrow at me. “A little?”

“Well it might have been more than a little.”

“Trey, you told Candy to tell me that I couldn’t stay at guys’ homes. And then you don’t show up for three days, all of which I’m thinking that you’ve decided I’m a floozy because of my night out and now you don’t want anything to do with me.” Her words are sharp and cut me deep. I hadn’t thought about how my actions would affect her. All I had thought about was how I was feeling and what I wanted.

“I would never think that about you Tally, I,” She cuts me off before I can finish.

“To be honest I really shouldn’t feel that way, I mean it’s not like we are dating. Hell, we barely know each other. You don’t owe me an explanation, just forget it.”

I clench my jaw so tight that I’m sure I’m going to crack some teeth. The pain of her words is shredding my insides, but what was even worse was seeing the pain in hers.

“I was angry.” I decide to ignore her dismissal and give her what I know she wants and needs, a reason and assurance. “I’m trying to crawl before I run, but my emotions and what I feel for you are sprinting full speed ahead.” I’m so screwing this up. I pinch the bridge of my nose and squeeze my eyes closed. I need to get a grip and speak plainly, but when she looks into my eyes like she is doing now words escape me. When I finally look up, my eyes search for something in hers, a sign that my words are not wasted on silent ears. I see her eyes narrow as she bites her bottom lip, there is life in her face; anger―yes, but she was listening.

“When I left here that day
, Candy’s words were like a broken record playing over and over in my mind. I tried to turn it off, but the more I tried the worse it became. I was angry because I had wanted to see you. I was angry because I couldn’t stomach the idea of you with another guy. I was angry because I can’t tell you what I feel. I can’t ruin this before it has even begun.” I tear my eyes from hers, not wanting to see the look of fear at hearing the intensity of what I feel. My chest aches and tightens as I wait for her to say something, anything.

“You didn’t want me to see you angry?”

I let out a relieved breath as I hear her words, so thankful that she isn’t screaming at me to get out and never come back―yet.

“I’m sorry, Tally. I should have thought about how it might make you feel, but all I could think about was you swimming with a bunch of guys and then staying with that Nate guy.”

Her eyes flicker with something; guilt, or shame but it’s gone so quickly that I think maybe I just imagined it.

“Nothing happened, I mean, if you are wondering or whatever.” She shrugs. Her lack of concern for a potentially dangerous situation ignites the flame of anger that had begun to simmer down.

“How well do you even know this Nate?” I snap, but don’t give her time to answer. “And do you know what a guy is thinking when he gets a girl to sleep at his house―in wet clothes?”

She waves off my concern with a small laugh. He didn’t find it funny that she could have been with a guy who took advantage of such a tempting situation.

“Nate is harmless.”

“He’s a guy,” I counter.

“He’s gay.”

That pulls me up short. Tally’s smile is smug as she watches my reaction.

My brilliant come back, “Oh.”

Her smile fades as she bites her bottom lip and shifts uneasily on the bed. I know s
he is uncertain where we stand.

“I’m not leaving, not until I get what I want.”

She smiles, but it’s tentative, like a frightened mare unsure of whether she should make a run for it
or trust the man before her.

Seconds seem to crawl as I wa
it for her response. Finally, she pats the spot next to her.

“What is it you want Trey?”

I move slowly, denying the urge to pull her into my arms and beg her forgiveness. I was sure that wouldn’t get me what I want. I sit down beside her and slide back against the wall. The cold of it seeps through my shirt, but where my shoulder touches Tally warmth shoots through me. I wonder if she feels it as well and I have my answer when she shudders and moves closer, until our leg and hip are touching as well.

“I want you to give this a chance,” I say.

“Okay,” she whispers and I turn to look at her, wanting, needing to see her face after having gone three days without her.

“Now that we have that covered. I want to know you.”

“What do you want to know?”

“Everything,” I answer quickly.

She laughs at my obvious eagerness.

“Alright, well my name is Tally
Baker. I love animals, and loath sports, because I’m so bad at them. I have no clue what I want to do with my life when I grow up. I live with my parents, side note, they are jerks, and I am an only child. I don’t have a favorite color, I like them all. I prefer singer/song writer music. I love scary movies, but won’t watch them by myself. I’ve been kissed twice in my life and the second guy tried for second base. He stopped when he realized I was laughing at him. When he asked me why I told him that if he ran the bases like he kissed then I forfeit the game.”

I cringed. “H
arsh.” For a brief moment I feel sorry for the guy but then I remember that she just told me he had been trying to touch her, okay now I want to kill the guy. I tell myself not to say the words that pop into my mind, but I enjoy her reactions way too much. “I’ll remember that.”

“That I’m harsh?” She asked and her eyes flicker with curiosity.

“No, I’ll remember to make my kiss worthy of the bases.”

I watch her closely and for a brief second shock has her mouth dropping open, but it is quickly replaced with the light of interest in her eyes and a wicked grin on her full, tempting mouth.

“I’ve upped my standards since then, so you might want to consider making that kiss worthy of the whole game.”

“I feel guilty for being so happy, though my mother is in a psychiatric hospital. I almost feel like I don’t deserve what I have been given with Tally, even if it is a few short hours every day. I’d like to say that I’d give it up if it
was the right thing to do, but saying and doing are very different things.” ~Trey

“Don’t even try to pick up where we left off yesterday,” Tally teases me as I sit down next to her in what we have silently claimed as our spot. I hold my hands up letting her know I’m waving the white flag already and she flashes me one of her quick, but heart stopping grins.
It’s been one day since I apologized for not coming to see her and I kick myself for missing out on that grin during the three days I was a no show.

“If the bases are off limits, then what do you have in mind?” I ask as I playfully nudge her shoulder. She has never initiated any sort of touch with me, and I have never been an overly touchy person, but I am constantly looking for subtle ways to touch her, to be able to have that small privilege. But I can tell it’s going to take time.

She produces a deck of cards from her back pocket. Lucky damn deck of cards, I think and then try to feel bad about thinking it, nope not going to happen.

“I figured we could play cards.” She takes the deck from the box and begins to expertly shuffle them.

“What game do you have in mind?”

She laughs and I see the blush crawl up her neck. This ought to be good.

“I was thinking we could play slap jack, and for every jack you slap you get to ask a question.”