Catch My Breath (17 page)

“So what are we going to do? The timing sucks. The situation sucks. The other guys….”

Danny shook his head. But he couldn’t help it. He reached up and dragged his fingers gently across Elliot’s cheek before he leaned in for another kiss. Even if it was the worst idea in the whole world, staying away from Elliot was impossible.

“I want the same thing you do. This. But you’re right. The guys.”

“And the fans, and everything else….” Elliot looked dejected. “It’s a bad idea, isn’t it?”

“Probably. But I can’t seem to stay away from you.”

“Me neither.” Elliot nuzzled his head into Danny’s neck as he did so often. His hair smelled familiar and sweet. It was one of the things Danny loved most about him.

“So maybe we know how we feel about each other, but nobody else has to? Don’t put a name on it yet?” Danny asked quietly. He didn’t want it to be that way. He wanted to shout and laugh and tell everybody he was falling hard for his best friend and it was the most amazing thing that had ever happened to him. But that would never work.

“It’s probably a good idea.”

Elliot didn’t look like he liked it. Danny didn’t know
what
to think, honestly. But he was scared. Bottom line. Scared to lose Static. Scared to lose Elliot. Scared of going back to the way things used to be. He couldn’t go back.

“Hey, El? Babe?” Elliot looked up. His eyes were damp and huge. “I’m just trying to do what’s right for everyone, okay?”

Elliot wiped at his eyes. He looked frustrated with himself. “I know. I’m being stupid. I’m happy, you know? So happy about the band and us and how I feel about you.” He laughed softly. “And I can’t even believe you feel it too. It’s like I don’t even know what to do with everything that’s happening. It’s overwhelming and amazing and crazy. But I wish….”

“I know. Me too.” Danny threaded his hands into Elliot’s hair and pulled him close for a long kiss. “I know.”

Elliot took a long shaky breath and nodded. “So how do we keep this off the cameras? ’Cause I swear to God I’ve forgotten and nearly kissed you about a dozen times.”

Danny chuckled. “No kidding. I think it helps to talk about it. So we’re aware. Sometimes I don’t even realize when I’m touching you.”

“Me too. We’ll have to work on that.”

“And we should probably make sure we’re with the other guys more. We’ve been off on our own a lot lately. And we should joke with them more like we did at the beginning.”

“Less us, more everybody,” Elliot agreed. “But when we’re in here alone….”

“When we’re in here alone, you’re mine.”

For that Danny got a slow, sweet smile. “Yes. And you’re mine.”

Danny was tired of talking, tired of checking himself when all he wanted to do was touch and kiss and breathe Elliot in. It was time to let go, to let themselves do everything they wanted to do all day but couldn’t. He pulled his shirt off over his head and hissed with pleasure when his skin touched Elliot’s, when their lips collided. It felt like it had been
forever
since they’d touched, not just hours. Danny was addicted. There was something about Elliot’s warmth, his lean muscles, the way Elliot’s body instinctively curled around his. Danny’s hands found Elliot’s back, the long dent of his spine, tempting curves covered by frustrating sweats. He rubbed and Elliot purred, arching into his touch. They hadn’t done anything more than kiss and touch a bit. Danny wasn’t going to lie to himself. He wanted more. Judging from the way Elliot’s hand was about a half inch from squirming down the back of his pajama bottoms as well, he wasn’t the only one.

“
Danny
,” Elliot moaned against his mouth. He hooked his thigh over Danny’s hips and pulled him closer. It wasn’t close enough. It never was. Danny succumbed to his need for skin and slipped his hands under the waistband of Elliot’s sweats—not far, just enough to feel the beginnings of a sweet swell of muscle and flesh. Elliot groaned against his mouth and deepened the kiss, his hand sliding under Danny’s waistband, nails scratching lightly at Danny’s skin.

Every inch of Danny’s back went all shivery. He was turned-on as hell, and it felt so right, like this was the way he and Elliot were supposed to be, bodies entwined, lips together, hands touching, hearts pounding out of their skin.

“I love this,” Elliot whispered when they drew away for breath. “I never knew it could feel so….”

“Insanely good?” Danny shuddered and cupped his hand around the curve of Elliot’s ass to pull him closer.

“Better than that,” Elliot groaned. He raked his fingers up Danny’s spine and tangled them in his hair, cupped his face, thumbed across Danny’s cheeks. His eyes were wide and full of wonder, as if he still couldn’t believe he and Danny were real. “Have you… been like this with a guy before?” he asked quietly.

They’d spent so much time ducking around corners to make out they hadn’t ever talked about what they’d been doing, as if maybe bringing up the real subjects would break whatever spell they’d been under. Danny didn’t want to deal with reality anymore, but he supposed Elliot deserved to know.

“No. I’d been with Katie since we were kids. I noticed guys before, but I never did anything about it. Have you?”

Elliot gulped. “I’ve never been with anyone like this before. I made out with a couple girls and a guy or two. Messed around a little. It was nice. Okay, you know? But,” he sank his fingers back into Danny’s hair, that
look
on his face again like he was awestruck, “this is nothing like that.
Nothing.
”

“Not even close.” Danny smiled. “I—” Danny broke off. It was one thing to say it to Reece or Tate or Webb. Danny loved them, and he admitted it freely. If he said it to Elliot it would mean something else entirely. Something he felt so hard it hurt. He just couldn’t say it. Not yet.

“What?” Elliot whispered.

“Nothing. Just want to kiss you again.”

Elliot grinned at that. “Okay.”

Chapter 10

D
ANNY
was tired. Like bone deep, never been so tired in his life kind of tired. They hadn’t done anything physical that day, but they’d been at the studio for
hours
, even missing the house’s typical dinner hour. Josephine had made them their own dinner, spaghetti and warm breadsticks, salad, and even brownies for dessert. He barely even noticed the plush seat of the booth-style table in their house’s kitchen, just collapsed gratefully in front of a plate of food, Elliot on one side and Webb on the other.

“Today was so long,” Reece mumbled around a mouthful of pasta. He hadn’t even waited for the rest of them to sit before he started eating. “If tomorrow wasn’t a light day I swear I’d cry.”

“Just keep eating,” Tate said, snickering. “That usually seems to help.”

Reece used his free hand to flip Tate off but kept shoving noodles in his mouth. Danny laughed, loopy from too little sleep and hours of recording. He didn’t even care if it was funny. Webb’s head drooped onto his shoulder, and he reached up to ruffle Webb’s hair, conscious of Elliot’s heat pressed up against his other side. Webb went to put a breadstick in his mouth, but his eyes were closed and he missed, shoving the breadstick against Danny’s shoulder instead.

“Hey, dork!” Danny nudged Webb with his shoulder. Webb sat up and laughed when he realized what he’d done.

“What, you want it in your mouth?” Webb joked. “You want my breadstick in your mouth?” He started poking Danny’s mouth with it. “It might not fit in there with Elliot’s pickle. My breadstick is pretty big.”

Danny laughed and shoved his own breadstick at Webb. “I think you want my breadstick in
your
mouth.”

They both chuckled and tried without much luck to jam buttery breadsticks in each other’s faces.

“Hey, you trying to make me jealous? Get off my man.” Elliot’s voice was low and grumbly. He reached over Danny and prodded Webb with his fork.

He was trying to joke about it. Danny knew he was. But it was obvious he wasn’t kidding. Elliot’s face went stony, and he glared at poor unsuspecting Webb. Danny backed off immediately. Jealousy and exhaustion weren’t the best combination. Danny saw Elliot’s jaw working, muscles clenched. Webb just laughed, oblivious, and kept trying to shove the breadstick in Danny’s mouth.

Elliot took a few more irritated bites, then dropped his fork on his plate so it clattered and ended up on the table. Then he crawled over Reece and stomped off toward the stairs without saying a word.

“Shit,” Reece breathed. “What was that?”

“He’s probably just tired,” Tate answered, his voice kind and understanding. He and Elliot didn’t have much in common, but Tate loved his boys. All of them.

“Maybe I should go talk to him?” Webb asked. He looked guilty, like he’d actually done something wrong.

“Nah, I got it.” Danny took a few more bites of his dinner, a couple gulps of juice, and grabbed some breadsticks to go. “See you in the morning, guys.”

He plodded up the stairs, chewing slowly. How could Elliot really be jealous over Webb, of all people? Sure, Webb was insanely gorgeous—probably the hottest of all of them by far, to tell the truth—but Danny didn’t see him like that. He never could. Webb was like his brother, his favorite prank buddy. How could anybody not see that all Danny ever wanted to do was be with Elliot? He pushed open the door, ready to say all of that.

Elliot was sitting cross-legged on the floor. “Sorry,” he mumbled as soon as Danny walked in. “That was pretty childish.”

“You know I’m not into Webb like that, El. What happened?”

Elliot shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m just tired and I was already a little pissy and Webb’s so hot”— he glanced up—“even if you’re not into him, you know he is.”

Danny nodded in agreement.

“It’s just… it was stupid. The guys don’t even know how I feel about you. Webb was just messing around, but it looked like you were flirting, and I’ve
never
felt like that before. Like this flash of anger that he even dared to touch you.”

“We touch the other guys all the time.” Danny was confused.

“I already said it was stupid. Remember when you told me how you got jealous over Savannah even though you knew I didn’t mean it?”

“True.” He’d never felt jealousy like that before, hot and irrational and strong enough to make him want to hate Savannah when she’d done nothing wrong. Of course, he’d never felt like he did about Elliot either. Apparently he wasn’t the only one. They were going to have to be so careful or things would blow up someday soon. Danny reached out and cupped Elliot’s face. “Guess we’ll just have to watch for that and talk to each other about it.”

“Yeah. Should I go apologize to Webb?”

Danny rubbed Elliot between his shoulder blades. “Nah. Talk to him in the morning. It’s cool.”

“Bed?” Elliot asked.

“Yeah. I’m exhausted.”

“D
ANNY
, did you just get asked to meet in Mike’s trailer?” Elliot asked the next morning. His eyes were wide with worry.

“Yeah, in like ten minutes right?” Danny was worried too. They hadn’t been as careful the past few days, reckless in their touches, kissing places where people could find them more easily. Sleep deprivation and escalating need hadn’t been a good combination where Danny and Elliot were concerned. He didn’t
think
they’d been caught, but a meeting with just him and Elliot in the producer’s trailer didn’t sound very good.

“What do you think this is about?”

“What else could it be about? They probably saw something they shouldn’t see and are going to bust our asses over it.”

“W
E
JUST
want you two to take a break from each other,” Mike, the show’s main producer, said when Danny and Elliot were seated in the producer’s trailer at the side of the house. He and the other producers had just informed Elliot he would be taking a few days off from the show. Danny didn’t like it. He doubted Elliot liked it either. “We saw the footage from the kitchen last night. Things have gotten a bit… close.”

Oh, shit. That’s what prompted this….

“Wait, so you want me to go
home
? Like to my parents’ house?” Elliot asked.

“For a few days. Just a breather,” Mike answered.

“Your friendship reads as awfully intense on film. It makes you look less accessible to the fans if you’re always looking at each other,” Sharita, another producer, added. Danny waited for them to say the word “gay.” Waited for a bomb to drop. But it never did.

“So we’re too close as friends?” he clarified. “That doesn’t make any sense.”

“Yeah, I thought the fans liked all our little bromances. And what does me going home have to do with that?” Elliot asked.

“They do like the bromances. To a point. But if you and Danny are always more interested in talking and joking with each other than flirting with the girls on the show, how are the fans going to expect you to want to flirt with them?”

“We don’t want to flirt with them,” Elliot blurted out. “We don’t even know them.”

Danny’s heart melted a little at Elliot’s naive outlook. He got it. They weren’t Chris, they weren’t Isaiah either. It wasn’t just about the music for Static. A big part of boy-band appeal was the boys themselves and the fantasy that they were available and ready to fall in love with a swooning fan at any given time.