Conklin's Blueprints (35 page)

Keeping my hands on his face, I slowly nodded yes.  I wasn’t going to lie to him.  He sighed and closed his already tired eyes.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know he was going to be there.  I never would have gone.  But you have to believe me that he doesn’t mean anything to me.  We were always just friends.”

When he opened his eyes they were blazing.  “So you always just fuck your friends?”

I gaped at him and dropped my hands from his face.  “Um, no I don’t.  Did you always fuck your parents’ staff?”  The bite in my tone was unrecognizable to my lips.  His jaw tensed as his eyes narrowed even more.  I turned on my heel, and walked to the sink, grabbing the edge of the counter.

Tyler came over behind me.  “No, I didn’t.”  His tone was a bit gentler.

The urge to cry was approaching.  “He was my first, okay?  I’m sorry if I looked like I was happy when I was talking to him.”

Tyler tugged my arm and pulled me to face him, his scowl softened.  “I’m sorry.  I shouldn’t have lashed out at you.  I’m just tired and cranky, and… I miss you.”

A tear escaped my eye as I crossed my arms.  He grabbed my crossed arms and pulled them around his neck and hugged me.  “So… he was your first, eh?”  Tyler said into my hair a bit more light hearted while rubbing my back.

I nodded my head.  Were we really going to talk about this?

“How old were you?” he gently asked.

I nuzzled into his chest, taking in the sporty scent of his cologne.  “Eighteen.  Typical prom gone wrong, ended up in the backseat with the bad boy.”

Tyler laughed.  I was shocked.  He was freaking out over if I had slept with Gage or not, now he was laughing about it.  I tilted my head up to look at him.  He was grinning down at me.

“I was in our pool house.  I had some friends over, and we were drinking.  Margo came back and scolded us.  All of my friends left, and she stayed.”

Margo?  Who names their kid Margo?

“You never did say how old she was.”

He smirked. “At the time, she was 32.”

Geez, 16 years older than him!  I grunted in disgust.  He squeezed me tighter and laughed.  His mood had returned, and I needed to let my mood pass and join him.  I looked up at him as I moved my hands from his neck to his back, un-tucking his dress shirt so I could rub my hands along his warm skin.

With a flirtatious grin I asked him, “So, about that wooing me to the moon and back?”

Chapter 20

After a lazy morning of snuggling and giggling in bed, Tyler and I finally got up and got ready to face our families for Thanksgiving.  Tyler was brave enough to let me drive the Maserati and drop him off at the airport and take his car to my parents’ house.  It was nice because then I wouldn’t have to ask Roger to come and get me.  I really needed to work on getting myself a car.  I had saved enough money for a down payment on one, but I figured the longer I could save, the less interest I would have to pay.  And I wasn’t about to charge it to Daddy’s credit card that I still carried around in shame.

After a long kiss goodbye to Tyler I drove off to my parents’ house.  I dressed casually, and I was sure my mother would scold me for wearing jeans on a holiday.  I don’t know why it mattered; it was just going to be our immediate family.  My jeans and sweater was comfortable for over eating. 

I sighed as I thought about the food.  I hated holidays because of food.  The table would be full of temptation, and everyone else would be filling their plates, making me feel more comfortable to do the same.  Hopefully Roger didn’t make his famous Dutch apple pie.  If he did, I would be doomed.

When I walked to the door, I was greeted with open arms by my mother and father.  Shockingly I was the first one there, then Michael, and, of course, my nearly ready-to-pop sister was the last to arrive.  She only had four weeks to go and was obsessing over the possibility of having the baby on Christmas.

Dinner was wonderful, and my family talked about odds and ends.  The entire time I stayed rather quiet, picking at my food, trying to avoid the mashed potatoes and gravy and the stuffing.  My plate consisted of turkey, Brussels sprouts, sweet potatoes, and a very tiny portion of green bean casserole.  And to my horror, Roger had made his famous pie.  I didn’t want to make him feel bad, so I had a very small sliver.  It was so good I felt like it was a sin to eat it.  I was going to have to hit the gym extra hard tomorrow.

With full bellies, my family and I moved to the living room.  I grabbed a pillow and laid on the floor, letting the rest of my family sit on the furniture.  I didn’t mind.  Josie had her blanket and came over to curl up next to me.  I loved to cuddle with her.  I played with her hair as she fell asleep next to me.  The maternal instinct hit me hard as I thought of Tyler.  I wondered if he wanted kids.

The rest of the day was spent playing games and even watching a movie.  I ended up crashing at my parents in my old room.  It was painted a light yellow with a canopy bed with white fluffy bedding.  I had a pin up board with random pictures, mainly of family and of Ashlynn and me.  I even had a picture of Gage,
my bad boy summer fling and virginity holder
, and me downtown at the Fourth of July fireworks.  I had never really looked at the picture.  I was wearing a high school tennis T-shirt with short khaki shorts and thong sandals.  We were sitting on a blanket, Gage in cargo shorts and a Ramones T-shirt, arms around me.  I didn’t think anything of it at the time, but in the picture we looked like an item. 

I brought one of Tyler’s T-shirts and put it on.  It smelled like his cologne and soap.  It was so comforting but made my big, fluffy bed lonely.  I wanted him here with me more than anything.  I grabbed my phone from the side table and decided to give him a call.  We had sent random texts to each other throughout the day, but I wanted to hear his voice.  I swiped his name on my call list and held the phone to my ear.

“Hey baby doll,” Tyler greeted me.  I smiled.  I loved when he called me that.  It made me feel girly, and I rarely felt that way.

“Hi.  Did you survive the festivities?” I asked, curling up in the blankets.

“Barely.  Mitch gloated about his latest conquests to RJ while Nathan drank with my mother,” he muttered.  “I would have rather been with you.”

I blushed and grinned from ear to ear.  “I miss you, too.”

“I will be back tomorrow evening.  Will you be home?”  His voice was hopeful.

“Well, there is this guy I was hoping to hang out with tomorrow…” I teased.

I heard Tyler chuckle, “Oh, yeah?  Anyone I know?”

“Yes.  He is very charming, attractive, likes baseball, and makes me smile…”

“Hmm… sounds like a keeper.”

I giggled, “Oh, I hope so.  I’m wearing one of his shirts right now.”

“Yeah?  Is that all you are wearing?” he said seductively.

“Maybe… I believe I am wearing another one of your favorites as well,” I said biting my lip.

I heard a low groan over the phone, “Is it the black lacy ones?”

I giggled again, “Good guess.  Too bad you aren’t here, in my childhood room.  We could christen my white sheets.”

“Careful, I might get in the car and sneak in your window.” he said, his voice raspy.

“Mmm, that would be a pleasant surprise.”

The receiver went silent.

“Your room is on the lower level, right?  And it’s a walk out?”

I laughed.  “Tyler, you are not going to drive here.  That would be crazy.”

“I’m very tempted.  I don’t have anything I can’t do in the GR office tomorrow.”

“You are crazy, and I need to go to sleep.  I cannot wait to see you tomorrow.”  I laughed again.

“Okay, baby.  Leave your window unlocked… just in case,” he flirted.

“Goodnight.”  I said rolling my eyes.

“Goodnight baby doll. See you soon.”

~

I went and picked up Tyler from the airport late Friday night.  His flight arrived just after 7:00pm, and I was so excited to see him.  The whole weekend we were inseparable and hibernated in the warmth of my condo with the fireplace in our living room constantly lit.

“Why don’t we get into your hot tub?  My muscles could use the relaxation,” Tyler said, taking his last bite of our Chinese takeout.  

“I’m sorry, have I not been doing a good job of relaxing you this weekend?”  I said trying to sound wounded.

Tyler reached across the back of my chair at the kitchen island and pulled my shoulders so I was pinned to his side and nuzzled my neck, causing me to giggle.  “I have never been more relaxed.  It’s snowing, and we have never gone in your hot tub.  I think it would be pretty to look out at the city under the stars with the snow falling on us.”  His eyes were glistening.   

“That sounds very romantic of you,” I teased.

He shrugged his shoulders and rubbed our noses together.

“Do you even have a suit?”  I asked him, pulling away so I could take another bite of my chicken and vegetables.

“Um, I didn’t know I needed one?” he smirked.  I glanced over at him. 

“So the whole being under the city lights in the snow was all really a cover up for I just want to get you naked.”  He couldn’t contain his smirk.  “I’m onto you Mr. Conklin.  Too bad for you I have my one piece with a skirt.”

“You would still look beautiful, Bec.  And could you not call me Mr. Conklin?  I picture your flirty little smile being given to my asshat of a father,” he said frowning.

I rolled my eyes and stood from the counter, grabbing our empty Chinese boxes and throwing them in the garbage.  He was always so bitter when it came to RJ.

“Come on, let’s go get you relaxed,” I teased him.

We wandered into my bedroom, and I went in my closet to search for an appropriate bathing suit. Going in without any clothes on seemed exciting, but letting him take it off of me sounded even better.  As I rummaged through my clothing, Tyler stood in the door frame with just his gym shorts on.

“I will meet you out there,” I said as I found my light blue basic bikini.  

He had his mischievous grin plastered to his face.  “I don’t know why you are even going to bother,” he said, shaking his head and smiling as he turned to go out on the back porch.

I threw on the blue bikini then put my hair up and stared in the mirror, rubbing my stomach, my eyes fixated on the few stretch marks above the bikini line.  I sighed.  Tyler had to of gotten a glimpse of them at some point.  He was just nice enough to not point them out.  I wished my body could be perfect like he was.  I wrapped myself in my towel and headed out to join him. He was already sitting in the bubbles, staring out at the city life.  I went to put down both towels and noticed Tyler’s shorts on the chair.  I shook my head and grinned. 

Thankful he hadn’t turned on the porch light, I hurried into the warm water next to him.  His arms instantly reached for me and pulled me close.  We sat quiet for a while, gazing out at the city lights.  Grand Rapids was small compared to staring out Tyler’s condo in Chicago, but I liked it. 

Tyler kissed the soft spot behind my ear and whispered, “I wish we could have spent Thanksgiving together.”

I let my head relax to the side as his lips continued to graze my neck.  His kisses were very sweet and soft, coated with affection and compassion.  “I know.  Maybe we can spend Christmas Eve and morning together?  I know my family would love it if you came over on Christmas Eve.  We all go to a candlelight service then we drive around and look at Christmas lights and eat a bunch of food.”

I felt his smirk on my neck.  “I would love that.  Waking next to you on Christmas morning would be the best present ever.”

I pulled my knees to my chest and brought my head back so I could look at him.  The city lights lit up Tyler’s face, allowing me to see the emotion that fled.  He was calm and relaxed, looking at me with his soft blue green eyes.  His brows and jaw were relaxed and only seemed to be relaxed when we were alone like this. With his arm cozily behind me on the ledge of the tub, I braved my next words.

“I would be willing to go to Chicago with you on Christmas day.”  I kept my eyes on him as I said the words.  His jaw flexed, and he pulled his arm from behind me to his lap.

“Becca, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he said, putting both of his hands on his chin.  I coiled away from him and moved across the tub, putting my elbows on the edge and my chin on my hands, staring over the city.  How were we ever going to move forward if he wouldn’t bring me around his family?  I knew I needed to give him time; we had only been together for six weeks.

Six weeks
.  How did I have such strong feelings for him already?  I felt a tear escape my eye.  I wanted so much with him, but I needed to hold off.  I couldn’t scare him away, and I had to accept his terms.  Otherwise I would lose him, and losing him wasn’t an option.

I heard the slosh of water and felt Tyler’s chin on my shoulder.  He didn’t say anything, and neither did I.  I tried to fight back the tears and stay strong enough so he wouldn’t realize how much not meeting his family bothered me.

Tyler wrapped his arms around my middle and kissed my shoulder.  “I can spend both days with you and your family, if that’s okay.”

I sighed.  I would love to spend the entire holiday with Tyler and my family, but I couldn’t take him away from his mom on the most celebrated holiday of the year.  “Tyler, you have to be with your family on Christmas.  I’m sure your mom would be heartbroken if you weren’t there,” I whispered, even though I really wanted him all to myself.

He nuzzled my neck.  “I don’t want to be with her and my good for nothing father; I want to be with you.”

I turned around so I would face him.  It was time to be blunt and get some answers.  I put my hands on his shoulders and looked him square in the eye.  “What did your parents do that made you dislike them so much?”

Tyler’s face tightened along with his grip on my hips.  He looked away, out towards the city.  I moved my hands to his face and forced him to look at me.  “Ty, tell me.  Help me to understand.  I can’t be on your side if you don’t tell me why.”