Dancing Naked (14 page)

“You’ll probably have dozens of your own babies,” Kia teased, relief flooding through her. She didn’t know
what was bothering him, but she knew she wanted him with her for the next six months. And after that ...

“How old are you, Justin?” she asked.

“Don’t you know it’s not polite to ask a person’s age?” he teased.

“How old are you?” she repeated.

“Twenty-three, if you really must know.”

So, there was six years between them then, which might seem like a lot now, she thought, but it wouldn’t be once she was an adult. And if she kept the baby she’d be a parent. How much more adult could you get?

“Baseball tryouts are next Saturday,” Shawna said.

“What time?” Kia asked. They were walking down the crowded school hallway toward their next class.

“Noon, I think. I wonder if we’ll keep the same positions this year.”

“I hope so,” Kia said. “Last year was so ... damn!” She came to a sudden stop and then had to fight her way over to the wall to avoid being trampled by the crowd of students coming up behind her.

Shawna followed. “What?”

“I can’t play this year,” said Kia.

“Why not?”

Kia watched as realization dawned on her friend’s face.

“Oh yeah.”

“I forgot all about baseball.”

“What are you going to tell the others?”

“The truth, I guess. I know I’m not showing yet, but it’s bound to happen soon.”

“I guess that means Camp Chewelah is out too.”

Kia nodded. “The baby’s due at the end of August. I don’t think they’ll want a junior counselor who’s pregnant.” She sighed. “I forgot all about that too.”

“It was going to be a blast.”

“I know. Maybe next summer.” Maybe. If she didn’t have a one-year-old child. With a heavy heart, Kia followed Shawna into Math class.

March 1

This detour is full of pitfalls.

What’s so great about that?

I’m not even a real mom yet, but I’ve already had to give up so much.

What’s the big deal about being a parent anyway?

Kia crossed her legs and gritted her teeth. “I can’t hold on much longer. I’m going to explode!”

Justin approached the woman who sat behind the desk at the ultrasound clinic. “Can you tell us how much longer? Kia’s not going to make it.”

The woman reached under the desk and pulled out a plastic container that resembled a measuring cup. “Perhaps she could void about four ounces. To here,” she said, indicating a line on the cup.

“You’ve got to be kidding!” Kia wailed. “Once I start peeing there’ll be no stopping.”

Justin stared helplessly at Kia.

“That’s it,” she said, getting to her feet. “Point the way to the washroom. I’ve got to go, now.”

The door to the ultrasound room swung open and a technician whose name tag identified her as Yvonne stepped into the waiting room. “Are you Kia?” she asked.

“I am, but I’m on my way to the washroom,” Kia said. “I can’t wait another second.”

“Come on in and lie down,” Yvonne said. “It will take the pressure off your bladder. You need to have a full bladder to help us see the baby, but the exam will only take a few minutes and then you can go to the bathroom. You’ve come this far, it would be a shame not to do the ultrasound now.”

Kia took a deep breath, clutched the back of her gown together and entered the dark room.

“I’ll call you in a moment,” Yvonne said to Justin. “Once I’ve taken the measurements you’ll be able to get a sneak preview of your baby.”

Justin nodded and returned to his seat.

Kia climbed up on the cot and lay down. Immediately she felt some relief on her throbbing bladder. Yvonne pulled the medical gown up to Kia’s navel after covering her from the hips down with a sheet. Kia flinched when the woman squirted a cool gel on her stomach.

“I’m sorry, I know it’s cold, but it helps the paddle move.” Yvonne placed an instrument on Kia’s skin and swirled it through the gel. Then she began to peer into a screen as she slowly moved the paddle around Kia’s lower abdomen. Now and again she stopped and pushed some buttons on her computer.

“This is a real active little guy,” Yvonne said, rotating
the paddle. “He won’t stay still long enough for me to measure him.”

“Him?”

“Him or her. I’m not going to tell,” she said with a smile. “But
it
is kicking up a storm. A real swimmer.” She pushed a little harder on the paddle and studied the screen. Suddenly she hit a couple more keys. “There, got it.”

“Is everything okay?”

“Everything looks fine. I’ll send the report to your doctor and she can go over it with you. Should I go and get the young man?”

“Sure. Thanks.”

Yvonne swiveled the computer screen so it was facing Kia and then went to the door to call Justin. After he had taken a seat, he picked up Kia’s hand, and they studied the image on the screen together.

“This is its head,” Yvonne said, pointing at a dark area near the top of the screen. She pushed harder on the paddle as she studied the image. “And this is one arm, the other arm, and down here are the legs.”

“I can’t see anything,” Kia said, disappointed.

“Me neither,” said Justin.

“Try looking at this area,” Yvonne suggested. “I’ve got it magnified so that what you see is bigger than what it is. Oh, look! It’s just put a hand to its mouth. I bet it’s sucking its thumb!”

“Oh, I see it!” Justin exclaimed. He pointed at something on the screen. “Look, Kia, the back is curved quite a bit and its head is facing down.”

“Huh? All I see are black clouds moving in and out on the screen.”

Yvonne used an arrow to point to a dark area. “This is the back of its head,” she said, “and the neck is here.” She drew a line on the screen. “This is the spine and this dark mass is the heart beating ...”

“Yes! I see it!” Kia squinted at the screen. “She does look like she’s sucking her thumb. Totally weird. We’re actually seeing my baby. This is so cool!”

Justin took her hand again. After watching the baby’s movements for a minute, Kia glanced at Justin and noticed that the sad smile from the other night was back on his face. She squeezed his hand. He glanced at her and suddenly the little-boy grin was back where it belonged.

“Look! She’s waving at us,” Justin said. “Wave back, Kia,” he said, waving at the screen himself. “Wave at your baby.”

She laughed, but joined him in waving at the dark mass on the screen.

Yvonne smiled as she removed the paddle from Kia’s abdomen and wiped off the gel.

“All right, now I really do have to pee,” Kia said. “You better get out of my way, Justin, or there’s no saying what may happen.”

He stood and backed up against the wall, putting up his hands in self-defense. Yvonne turned on the lights and Kia pulled her gown back down, tugged the sheet out from under it and leapt off the cot.

“It’s down the hall on your left,” Yvonne called at the retreating figure. She handed Justin a print of the image they’d just seen on the screen. “Your son,” she said. “Or daughter,” she added, laughing at his astonished face.

~ she sucks her thumb
~ she’s the size of a softball
~ baby empties bladder every 40-45 minutes

March 5

A picture
is
worth a thousand words.

I’ve seen her. She’s real. This detour is worth every extra

mile, pitfalls and all!

I don’t care about baseball or summer camp. I’m busy

growing a baby. She’s all there. I am creating her. It is

so amazing.

And Justin is there with me.

From:
        Kia <
[email protected]
>
To:
             Justin <
[email protected]
>
Date:
          March 7
Subject:
     help!
it happened. i couldn’t zip the zipper on my jeans today. this is going to be so weird. i’ve never been fat. so where is a good used clothing store? mom says she’s not paying for expensive clothes i’ll only wear for 6 months.
K (in sweat pants)

From:
        Justin <
[email protected]
>
To:
             Kia <
[email protected]
>
Date:
          March 7
Subject:
     help is here!
let’s go shopping! i’ll pick you up on sat. at 11:00. ok?
justinpajamabottoms.

From:
        Kia <
[email protected]
>
To:
             Justin <
[email protected]
>
Date:
          March 7
Subject:
     Re: help is here!
great!!! thanks!!!!
k.

“When is the baby due?” asked Miss Jaswal, the school counselor.

“The end of August.” Kia sat in the counselor’s office, facing her across a wide desk.

“And you plan to continue attending Creekside for the rest of this year?”

Kia nodded and tugged down on her baggy sweatshirt after observing how neatly Miss Jaswal’s pale-blue silk blouse tucked into the waistband of her snug Calvin Klein jeans.

“Senator Ridge High has a special program for teen mothers, you know.” Miss Jaswal crossed one long leg over the other and sat back in her chair. “Have you heard of it? You might feel more comfortable switching to that program.”

“No. My friends are here. I’m staying.”

Miss Jaswal leaned forward. “I understand how you feel now, Kia, but you might find your friends become ... how shall I put it?” She crinkled up her eyes. “Less friendly, once your pregnancy becomes more noticeable.” She glanced at Kia’s stomach. Her teeth were clenched but her lips were splayed in a chimpanzee-like smile. Kia noticed a lipstick smear on her front tooth. “I’ve seen it happen before,” Miss Jaswal continued. “Many times.”

“Less friendly?” Kia shook her head. “That won’t happen with my friends.”

“No? I hope you’re right.” Miss Jaswal sighed and leaned back in her chair again. “You’d have a lot more in common with those girls—the ones at Senator Ridge ...”

“The only thing I’d have in common with them is pregnancy. There’s more to me than that.”