Dangerous Beauty: Part Four: Beautifully Broken (14 page)

Kyle gave a violent swipe of his hand. “No,” he said firmly. “She deserves better … hell, she probably
wants
better.” That was most likely the reason she’d barely spoken to him in the last couple of weeks

Of course, Cesare shook his head in disagreement. “I’m afraid you are wrong, Kyle,” he sighed. “The longer you push her away, the more you hurt the poor girl. Eventually she’ll move on, but she’ll never be happy.”

“That’s not true, Pop!” Kyle yelled, hating the idea of Reanna’s unhappiness. “Don’t say shit like that. She will have better than me. She deserves it.”

“She deserves what she wants, Kyle! And that is you and Sofia.”

“She deserves someone that’s not …” Kyle’s features tightened as emotions hit him suddenly, causing his heart to twist in a knot. “She’s deserves a man that’s not so fucking … damaged.”

Eyes widening at Kyle’s words, Cesare once again stood to his feet. “Kyle,” he breathed, a mixture of disbelief, intense concern, and sadness falling over his face, “you are not talking about your scars …”

“Yes I’m fucking talking about my scars!” he shouted, hitting his fist against his chest. “I’m fucked up, Cesare!”

His family thought he was okay with the way he was because he feigned confidence on the outside, but in truth, Kyle had always struggled with accepting the man he was, both past and present. He’d become an expert at putting on a show, but with Reanna … he wasn’t able to do that. She brought the truth out of him, and he feared that one day she’d see too much of his truth and run away from him, leave him.

“Scars both inside and out. I am …” He swallowed the sudden lump in his throat. “I’m incapable of loving anyone.”

“Yet you do!” Cesare yelled, storming over to Kyle. “Your child! Your brothers, me; you love your step-mother, Gabriel, Angelo, Carterina, your nephews and niece. The list goes on, Kyle.”

“It’s not the same!”

“
It is the same!
” he shouted. Reaching forward, he cupped his son’s face. “Why is it so hard for you to accept love, when so much of it is given to you so freely, Kyle? Why do you still fear it?”

“I don’t fear it.”

“You do,” he said, dropping his hands. “Love does not always have to be pain, son. This woman, this Reanna has given you what you’ve always wanted. Real, true, genuine love that’s unconditional, and you still fight her as if she’s doing something to hurt you. Do you realize how badly you are hurting her … hurting yourself?”

Kyle remained silent.

“Do you not think she hurts the way you do?”

He still said nothing.

“Son, I know you may think that you’re doing you both a favor, but all you are really doing is prolonging the inevitable.” He pointed at him. “You will be with that woman.” He shook his head. “You will not stand by and allow her to be with anyone else because it is not in your nature to. It is not in any man’s nature. No matter what, Kyle, instinct will kick in, and you will do everything in your power to get her, and make her yours. And the longer you push her away, the more time and attention you give to a woman that is not her, in her face … the harder it will be for you to win her back when she leaves you. Because she
will
leave you. There is only so much a woman will take, son. Even one who loves you as much as that girl does. She’ll leave, you will suffer, and so will my granddaughter who loves that woman the way a child loves
their mother
.” Cesare shook his head again. “Are you even thinking about how it would affect Sofia if you let that woman run off into the sunset with another man? She will suffer just as much as you will, Kyle …”

No, Kyle hadn’t thought about the effects on his ladybug. He’d been selfish, only thinking of his own fears.

“If not for yourself, son, let your fear go for my granddaughter.”

“I love my daughter, Pop,” Kyle said softly.

Cesare nodded. “I know that, son.”

“And I know how badly she’d hurt, but I can’t …” He let his words trail off as he frowned and swallowed the lump in his throat. He shook his head. “I … don’t know how to be what she needs,” he confessed. “Reanna. I don’t know how to love her the way she deserves to be loved. I’ll fuck it up. I’m not romantic. Hell, I’m not even nice. I’m convinced that my daughter only loves me because I’m all she has. I’m a fucking monster.”

“You are,” Cesare agreed. “You are a monster, just like me. Mean as a snake.” He chuckled, placing a hand on Kyle’s shoulder. “We don’t give a fuck until somebody comes along to make us give a fuck.”

“I don’t want to hurt her, Papa,” Kyle whispered. Slowly, he brought his hand to his heart. “If I hurt her, I’ll fucking die. And what if I …” A pained expression fell over Kyle’s face as he lowered his eyes. “I’ve hurt a lot of women. Looked away from many tears, and each time I felt like I couldn’t control myself. I was angry for no fucking reason. Those women did nothing to me, yet there I was, making them feel like shit. What if I do that to Reanna? What if I fuck up? Reanna doesn’t put up with that shit, she’ll leave me. And it won’t be like when Faith left. When Faith left I only cared that she left my daughter alone, and took my shit, but if Reanna left she’d fucking …”

Kyle’s words died off again. He didn’t know if he’d be able to shake the pain of losing Reanna so easily. That would devastate him. The way he felt for her now was crippling enough, he could only imagine how much deeper his … feelings for her would become if he actually let his guard down; let himself fall for her.

Gently, his father pushed his shoulder until Kyle brought his eyes back to his.

“I know, Kyle,” he said, giving a nod of his head. “If anyone knows what it’s like to lose the woman he loves, it’s me …”

Kyle frowned, lowering his eyes. That was true.

Cesare gave Kyle’s shoulder a pat. “You need to give that woman the benefit of the doubt, Kyle. You can’t just expect her to tuck tail and run when things get a little messy. And don’t insult her by comparing her to Faith.”

“I didn’t.” Kyle shook his head. “I know she’s not Faith, Pop. That’s not what I meant.”

“Then what’s this, eh?” he asked, a soft smile pulling at his lips. “What is keeping you from giving me sweet-faced grandchildren with big brown eyes, then?”

Despite himself, Kyle chuckled at his father’s not-so-subtle description of Reanna and his fictional children, then he shrugged. “Me,” he answered honestly. “My feelings for her are a bit … intense, intimidating even.”

“Stronger than the feelings you had for Carterina?”

Kyle shook his head. “I’m not even sure if what I felt for Carter was love anymore. At least not the kind of love I’d thought it was. I’ve never felt anything like this before.”

Smiling wide, his father put his arm around him. “Then take it slow, bambino. Take it slow. Reanna will understand.”

“That is if she decides to give me a chance,” Kyle said doubtfully. “We aren’t even together yet and I’ve already fucked up more than once. She has the right to make me suffer for that. Hell, she is making me suffer …”

Two weeks. Two whole fucking weeks.

Aniyah had been both a distraction from his true desire and a wall he’d put up between him and the woman he really wanted. He wasn’t sure if Reanna would forgive him for being such an insensitive jackass for the past two years. He wasn’t sure if she’d take the time to understand why he’d been so hesitant to be with her, why he’d been trying to push her away.

“I agree,” Cesare said with a nod. “You’ve fucked up quite a bit.”

Kyle frowned, pressing his lips into a hard line. “Is that supposed to be encouraging me to go for it, get the girl? If so, you suck ass at it.”

Cesare laughed softly. “Calm down, you’ll make her see the light.” He pointed at him. “Just remember, no matter how long it takes to convince her you’re worth the ungodly amount of stress, you do not give up.”

Kyle nodded. “I know, Cesare.”

“That woman belongs to you, Kyle. You are a Valente. We don’t believe in that ‘if you love her then let her go’ shit.” He smirked. “We only make women believe that we do. But in truth, we are territorial, possessive, and fiercely jealous.” He pointed at him again. “Beware of that. Don’t let too much jealousy lead your actions. You’re a bit too homicidal for that.”

Kyle snorted. “I do not get jealous.”

He had no need to be. He wasn’t stupid, he knew how he looked. He didn’t hate the effect he had on women, nor the unusually good looks he’d inherited from both the Valente and Stone bloodlines.

His father laughed at him, then enveloped him in a tight hug, giving him a big, unwanted kiss on his cheek.

“You’re vain, son. Just like your papa.”

Kyle smiled slyly at that. The Valente men were quite the vain bunch. Vain, mean, with dirty mouths, and even dirtier minds.

“I love you, son.” He broke their hug with a chuckle. “You know that, right?”

Kyle nodded. “Of course I do.” And Kyle loved his father, too, with all of his heart.

“I’m always here for you, your brother. For whatever you need, do you understand?”

“I know. I know …” Kyle assured.

If there was anything he knew about his father, it was that he could tell the man anything and he’d never judge him, and never make him feel like shit. He’d only lend a genuinely loving ear, and help him through whatever obstacle life was throwing at him. Genuine love and support was a good quality of his father’s that he only shared with the few people he loved in this world. So not many knew that Cesare Valente was as kind hearted as he truly was.

His father then gave him another light pat on the back. “Good. Let’s head back to the kitchen. My food is cold now, and you still need to eat.”

Kyle was a little surprised to find that he was feeling a bit famished. Talking to his father really helped. “Yeah, sure” he said, walking next to his father as they headed out of the office. “Let’s hope Mickey hasn’t eaten everything.”

His father chuckled. “There’s a good chance that he has.”

Kyle laughed as they continued to walk, talk, and make their way to the kitchen. It hadn’t been until they were a few steps away when his father paused, turning to face him with one finger up as if he had something to say.

Kyle frowned. “Pop?”

“One last bit of advice before I release you back out into the world, son.”

Even though Kyle was confused, he nodded his head slowly.

Cesare lowered his eyes in thought for a moment, then lifted them again. “While I know how hard this can be when you have feelings for a woman, I need you to remember something …”

Kyle nodded.

“Do not, under any circumstances, pursue that woman until you end things with the secretary properly.”

Kyle’s brows rose.

“Do you understand?” his father asked. “I need to know that you understand. Doing so would only cause unnecessary dramatics, Kyle. Tell me you will wait until you end things with Aniyah.”

Umm …
Nodding slowly, Kyle muttered, “Uhh … yeah, sure,” he answered awkwardly.

“Kyle,” his father said his name more firmly.

Kyle groaned. “I got it, Pop,” he chuckled. “Jesus. I promise, okay?”

Seemingly satisfied with Kyle’s promise, Cesare nodded, and walked ahead of Kyle.

“Good,” he said happily.

Shaking his head at the old man, Kyle followed behind him until they reached the kitchen, and the sweet, excited voice of his daughter hit his ears.

“Papa!” she squealed, running into the kitchen, her long black ponytail flipping side to side. “Papa, papa, papa!”

Kyle laughed softly at her excitement. After taking a second to admire how fucking adorable his ladybug was in her school uniform for the hundredth time, he caught her when she made it to him, and tossed her into the air. Bringing her back to him, he kissed her cheeks over and over again.

Sofia giggled. “Papa …”

“
La mia bella bambina,”
Kyle said, lightly tickling her side. “Did my baby enjoy her dinner?”

She nodded her head emphatically. “
Molto buono, Papà . Ho due piatti. Nonna pensato che stavo per ammalarsi.”

Kyle’s eye widened in playful shock. “Two plates!” he exclaimed, placing his hand to her full little belly. “I don’t know, ladybug, Nonna may be right. I may have to watch you tonight to make sure you don’t get sick.”

“You can’t watch me, Papa, remember?”

Kyle’s brows furrowed a bit as he began walking forward with Sofia still in his arms. “Remember what?” he asked.

Once they reached the stove where dinner sat, Kyle sat his little girl on the counter, while he turned to grab himself a bowl.

“Sofia is staying with us for the weekend, son,” his father answered for Sofia. “I meant to tell you. Carter and Nathan are dropping off her cousins, too.”

“It’s gonna be fun!” Sofia bounced excitedly. “Nonno and Nonna said we can sleep here tonight, then tomorrow we’re going to Disney World on Nonno’s plane!”

Kyle’s brows rose as he looked over to where his father stood, happily eating his now re-heated bowl of noodles.

“Really?” he asked.