Darkness Before Dawn (31 page)

My eyes are trained on her ring finger as I secure my tie, and she sleeps soundlessly. Thinking back on my life, I don't think I've ever felt this content. I look at the time on my watch, wishing I had five extra minutes to crawl back in bed with my girl, but as tempting as she looks snuggled up in our plush covers, I would definitely run late. I sigh heavily, tearing my eyes from her slightly parted lips and messy dirty blond hair and walk quietly toward the door, careful not to wake her. In the kitchen I turn on my cellphone and switch on the television, sitting in front of it as I wait for my coffee to brew.

When my phone vibrates on my lap, I look down to find two missed calls from Colleen, my birth mother, and a text message from Erin. I scroll to the text message first.

Erin: OMG! Did you propose?!? Tom told me he saw Greg the other day! If it's true, CONGRATS!!!!!

I smile at the text message, thinking that Erin Andrews is definitely one of those girls that you hold on to. I know I would've if it hadn't been for Blake. Fortunately for Tom Buck, Erin's boyfriend, Blake came back to me. And even more fortunately for me, I didn't stop fighting when Blake wanted me to give up on her, on us.

I shake my head when I hear the coffee pot brewing and press down to check my voice messages while getting up and flicking off the television. Holding my phone to my ear with my shoulder, I serve myself a to-go cup and close it. The sound of Colleen's sad voice pours through and I instantly think of Aimee and what she's told me about her mother hurting over Camden's betrayal. I know I shouldn't punish Colleen for something her husband kept from her, but it's hard not to. The first message is yet another apology, which I huff at because I'm so damn sick of them from everybody. The second is a congratulations and invite to a charity party she's hosting in a couple of weeks. I consider deleting the messages and forgetting I ever heard them until I hear what the charity is for—foster homes.

I walk back to our room, opening it slightly to find Blake still sleeping. I take a breath and stride over to her, leaning over and breathing in her fresh scent before placing a kiss on the side of her head. I back away slowly and flinch when she stirs.

"Cole," she whispers in a grumble that makes me smile.

"Yeah, baby?" I whisper back, knowing she's still asleep.

"I love you. Be careful," she mumbles as she flips over to her stomach.

Why those three little words make my heart skip a beat every time she says them is beyond me. But they get me every single time. I love it.

"I love you too. Sleep tight."

My eyes widen when the time on the dresser catches my attention, and I see that it's already seven-thirty. I walk out quickly and close the door behind me, locking it from the inside before picking up my coffee and bolting out of the apartment.

I signal Bruce, who's standing at the end of the hall, over with my finger and walk to the elevator quickly, while taking out my phone and making sure the crew is already setting up for today's interview. Luckily, the network has been accommodating in letting me work anywhere and hasn't locked me into working in the studio. I've spoken to Blake about it a couple of times and she says she would move anywhere I need to, but I don't think leaving Aubry behind and moving to Connecticut is really something she would be interested in. It works out better when I travel to the athletes' locations anyway, even if it is a pain in my ass to get on an airplane for a one-day trip, sometimes multiple times a week. I can't really complain though, I'm doing something I never thought I would be and getting paid good money.

I text message Erin back my thank you and confirm that I did indeed get engaged over the weekend. Instead of calling Colleen back, I call Aimee to see what she thinks of the whole thing. Out of everything that's happened, I'm thankful that I was at least able to connect with my sister again. That alone has been worth the fucking heartache I've been through with these damn people.

"Hello?" she answers with audible exhaustion.

"Hey, did I wake you up?" I ask concerned.

"Nah, I had Aubry wake me up before he left so I could start studying for this fucking exam. I swear, I'm never going to law school again," she says with a groan.

I laugh. "Obviously, you already went once. Why would you go back?"

"Shut up, you know what I mean," she snaps, which makes me laugh again.

"Have you not had coffee yet?"

"No. Aubry went to the store yesterday WITH a list and forgot to buy coffee. But don't worry, he bought beer!" she says in annoyance.

"Yeah, he's a genius," I reply with a laugh, as I shake my head at his stupidity. "Your mom called and left a message about some charity event she's hosting. What do you know about that?"

"Hmm, other than I've been dragged to it every year of my life? Nothing. It's boring. People dance, there's food, a lot of important people usually go—athletes, politicians, you name it. You like the cause, I'm sure, so you'd enjoy it...Blake would, too. Aub and I will be there," she replies. "My dad won't be, if that's what you're really asking."

I rub my forehead before resting my elbow on the car door. "All right. And you know for a fact he's not going? What about Mark, does he go? And Brian?"

She exhales a breath. "There's really no telling, Cole. Sometimes they do, sometimes they just send money. I'm not the right person to ask about the guest list. I can find out and call you back if you want, but I know Mom really...she feels horrible. She's physically sick over this shit. She's...she's leaving my dad," she says, her broken whisper snagging at my heart.

I close my eyes wishing I had something nice to offer her: a condolence, words of encouragement, anything. "Are you okay?" I ask quietly.

"I mean, it's just weird, I guess. It's not like we were this big happy family or anything, but still."

I nod my head in understanding because I think I get it, a dysfunctional family is better than no family at all. And that's when I decide that I'll go to the charity event Colleen is hosting.

I stifle a laugh when I hear Spencer grunt in the seat beside me as I take a sharp turn onto Michigan Avenue.

"Sorry," I lie with a smile.

Cole's been using the Escalade lately, even leaving it at the airport when he goes out of town for work, so I get to use the black Audi A5 that we leased when he got his own show. Normally I don't drive any of the cars since I only use them when I'm going someplace in a hurry, and Spencer ends up driving me. I still prefer taking the L to get around, but I have way too many things to get done. It's hot out, so I'd rather sit in air conditioning, even if it means paying an obscene amount of money for parking.

Once I find a space in a parking garage, I toss the keys over to Spencer before walking across the street as he trails behind me. I scramble through the herd of business suits, looking over my shoulder periodically to make sure I haven't lost him before reaching the large glass doors of the mall. A masculine hand wraps his hand on the metal handle at the same time I do, and the scent of cinnamony-cigarettes wrapping around me startles me to a halt, as the door swings open.

"Missed you, chick," he murmurs low against my ear, so that only I can hear him.

My heart runs a mile a minute. I turn to him, wide-eyed, with my mouth hanging open and find him watching me in amusement. He places his forefinger under my chin, as if to playfully close my gaping mouth, and snaps me out of my shock.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I whisper harshly, snapping my head bewilderedly in all directions, even though I don't know exactly what I'm looking for.

"It's a public mall, I'm pretty sure I'm allowed to be here," he replies, making me look back toward him.

I cross my arms, raising an eyebrow. "What store are you going to?"

His smiling hazel eyes scan my face before trailing slowly down my body and back up. I watch his smile waver and his eyebrows pull together as he steps forward and jerks my hand quickly.

"You got engaged?" he asks in a low voice, looking from my hand to my eyes and back to my hands a couple of times.

I nod as he drops my hand from his. "Yeah, last week," I reply quietly with a small smile.

He scratches the back of his neck as he looks around the crowded mall before turning his attention back to me. "Congratulations," he offers with a small smile. "Are you happy?"

"I am. Very," I reply, smiling as my mind drifts to the moment Cole proposed, the house, my friends.

"Good. I'm glad, chick. I really am," Dean says, bobbing his head before tilting it to look at me.

"Thanks," I reply with a shrug. "Do you...do you want to go shopping with me?" I ask awkwardly.

The side of his mouth twitches. "Why not?"

"I have to get a dress though. Fair warning," I respond, raising an eyebrow.

My hand brushes his when we begin to walk beside each other, and I tense when he holds it in his. I turn toward him with probing eyes as I wiggle my hand out of his.

"Spending time with a friend is always fun," he says, squeezing my hand before I take it back completely.

"Friend," I confirm seriously.

Dean shakes his head with a laugh. "Yes, friend. Get over yourself!"

I roll my eyes at his statement and smile as we continue our walk around the stores. I spot a pair of shoes that I instantly fall in love with, but after searching for a dress to no avail, we take a break and go to the food court. Spencer appears beside us while I'm taking a bite of pizza and unexpectedly hands me his cell phone.

"Mr. Murphy wants to speak to you," Spencer announces in a serious tone.

My insides twist at the sound of his name, and my eyes shoot from Dean to Spencer before they land on the phone he's handing me.

"Hello?" I answer, my voice barely audible.

"Please tell me you're eating lunch with Russell," Cole says through clenched teeth.

I shut my eyes closed tightly. "I'm not," I whisper, not hearing my own voice over the sound of my pounding heart.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me, Blake!" he yells before huffing a breath. "I thought we went over this? I don't want you near him, ever. You need to cut ties with that part of your life. Enough is enough!"

I rub my forehead and open my eyes to look at Dean who's sitting across from me, watching me intently. His twitching jaw and hands fisted on the table tell me that he hears every word Cole is saying to me. "Can we talk about this later?" I ask Cole in a low voice.

He exhales into the line. "Are you going home now?"

"I still need to get a dress."

"We can go look for one tomorrow...together," he replies, his tone serious.

"I'm already here, Cole," I mutter with an eye roll that makes Dean snicker.

"I don't like him, Blake. I don't fucking like him," he says with a sigh.

"I know, but it's not what you think," I respond, defeated.

"I'll be home in an hour. If you're not there when I get there, I'm coming to the mall to get you," he says before hanging up, not giving me a chance to say anything.

I narrow my eyes at Spencer as I hand the phone back to him and push my slice of pizza aside, no longer hungry. Dean and I look at each other for a couple of seconds or minutes in complete silence; the only noise is that of the chatter around the food court.