Darkness Before Dawn (36 page)

"Hey, beautiful," Cole says, making me jump and turn around.

"Hey," I reply with a smile.

"You're in a better mood, I hope," he says with a grin as he pushes off of the doorframe and strides over to me.

I wrap my arms around his neck and stand on my tiptoes, leaning into him when he scoops me up and sits me on the table behind me. I place feather kisses on every inch of his face before reaching his lips and placing one there. Not letting me back away, he grabs both sides of my face and groans deeply as he delves his tongue into my mouth.

"I love you," he murmurs against my lips. "Even when you're being a pain in my ass."

I laugh, rolling my eyes and slap his shoulder lightly. "I love you too."

"I love how that looks on you," he says, picking the key up from my chest before letting it fall back in place.

"Me too," I respond before clearing my throat. "I have a question," I start, training my eyes on the back of his shirt collar as I pluck it with my fingers.

He cups my chin to make me look at him. "What is it?"

"Do you really want to get married at the courthouse?" I ask in a small voice.

His eyebrows knit together as confused eyes scan mine. "You want a wedding," he says finally, his lips spreading into a victorious smile. "You want a wedding!"

I feel my own smile broaden as confusion clouds my thoughts. "Why are you so excited about that?"

"Because you, Blake Brennan," he says flicking my nose with his and placing a peck on my lips, "want to celebrate the fact that you're going to be mine." He places another kiss on my lips. "You, Blake Brennan, want to throw a party," he continues in between kisses. "You, Blake Brennan, want to celebrate something with guests. Do you not see what a big deal that is?"

I laugh against his lips and wonder if he's lost his mind completely this time, but before I can say anything else, we're interrupted by my rumbling stomach.

"I guess I finally have something worth celebrating," I respond with a nonchalant shrug.

His smile falters as he looks into my eyes, caressing my face with the back of his hand. "You're worth celebrating, baby," he says quietly before clearing his throat. "Does this mean we can't get married next week?"

"Let me call Becky and find out," I reply with an eye roll.

"Cool. I'll go make you breakfast," he says, setting me down on my feet before walking away.

I pick up the phone and text message Aubry letting him know that a wedding is definitely on but not to worry about Maggie's house just yet. I think I have the perfect location for our nuptials, and I want to figure out how to keep it a surprise from Cole for once. I dial Becky's number, biting down on my lip to keep from bursting out the news as soon as she picks up.

On our way to the therapist, Cole and I go over wedding colors, flowers, and honeymoon locations.

"You wanna get married on the farm?" he asks, slowing down for a red light.

"Maybe."

"Maybe, huh?" he asks, trying to stifle a smile as he leans in to tickle me.

"Stop!" I plead in between giggles. "Just let me get the invitations and then you'll find out where, but the farm is a maybe."

"Shouldn't I be part of this?" he asks, pressing the accelerator. "Last time I checked, two people are getting married next week and I happen to be one of them."

"It's going to be small, Cole. Just let me handle it. Please? I've never planned a party in my life," I pout, trying to make him feel guilty.

He leans in and pokes my rib cage again, making me shift in my seat and laugh. "Don't play that card on me. That's your own fault."

When he parks outside of the building and turns off the car he looks over at me. "It's your wedding, Blake. As long as I'm the groom, you tell me where to go and I'm there—no matter where you want to get married."

"Thank you," I whisper before leaning over the center console of the car and kissing him.

"I pick the music though," he says when I back away from him.

Our visit with the therapist goes over by thirty minutes, and we agree to meet with her once a month unless we feel the need to go back before then. Once we started talking about our past, we can't seem to stop. Both of our issues seem to stem from the night we were kidnapped and thrown in other homes. Dr. Laura seems to think that even though we grew up in great homes, we always held on to the feeling of abandonment from that night. My pain runs a little deeper since I experienced the abandonment twice and then recently went through the kidnapping and loss of the baby. Even though I feel like I'm in a good place about the loss, it hurts that somebody could be so cruel and wanted to take my life so badly.

We're both silent on our way to the hospital, our minds both jogging with everything we talked about. I know I should let things go, but I can't bring myself to just close a chapter of my life that I don't understand. I just don't understand that night and why it happened and I don't think I'll ever fully be okay with it until I do.

"What are you thinking?" Cole asks, interrupting my thoughts as he pulls into the parking garage of the hospital.

"I just don't get it. They did all of that for money. Everything was about money. We were taken over some deal gone wrong. And why did Alex take me again if all he did was apologize to me when I was in that basement?" I ask, burying my face into my hands in frustration.

Cole places his hand on my shoulder. "You just have to let some things go, babe. Does it really matter why it happened? It happened. We survived. Hell, we had each other all those years and we didn't even know it was us. We got through it together, just let it go."

Hospitals make me queasy. Everything about them makes my stomach convulse—from the monotone colors to the smell of latex and syringes. I take a deep breath and check in with security before following her directions to Dean's room. Cole holds my hand as we walk the eerie hallways and I make an effort not to look into the open rooms. With each room we pass, I wonder the same things: how many people have died in there, how many lives were saved, how much blood was lost, who put them there?

Cole stops walking, making me stumble over my feet and look up startled. I follow his eyes to the man walking toward us dressed in jeans, a black shirt and black jacket layering his broad shoulders. The grim look on his face turns into shock when he spots us, before settling on grief. He stops a couple of feet away from us, close enough so that we can hear him, far enough so that Cole can't hurt him. The patch that covers his missing eye makes him look more human, less horrid than the glass eye did.

Cole's hand painfully tightens around mine as Alex's eye burns into me, making me shift from foot to foot before I take a deep breath and stare back.

Alex rubs his hand over his forehead. "I'm sorry for everything, Blake. I was in too deep with Benny. He was wrong, but he was my brother and if I hadn't done what I did, I don't think you'd be here right now. But I'm sorry for taking you away from your life, your loved ones. I'm sorry for...Cory...I'll never forgive myself for letting Benny go into the house before I did..." he says, his gruff voice breaking.

"Is it true? What Benny said?" I ask quietly as tears sting my eyes.

"What'd he say?" Alex asks, his shoulders slumping.

I tilt my head. "That you're...that Liam isn't my father...you are."

Alex's eye widens and he places his hands on his chest, taking a step back as if I've punched him before he regains his cool and clears his throat. "That's impossible. Cory married Liam when I..." he gasps, looking at me as he shakes his head roughly. "I...that's impossible. I'm sorry," he says, his voice barely audible before he rushes off, leaving me standing feeling shell-shocked at his reaction.

Cole pulls my hand, turning my body to face his, and cups my cheeks with one open hand. "You don't need them," he says through gritted teeth. "He's nobody."

I blink rapidly before tears can consume my vision and nod. We walk to Dean's room and knock on the door, pushing it open slightly at the sound of voices.

"Come in!" A female voice shouts from inside, and when we step in, I see Dean laying on the bed with Sandra on one side and the most adorable blond toddler sitting at Dean's side.

"Hey," I greet with a smile looking straight at the little boy.

"Hey," Dean and Sandra say unanimously.

"Hope it's okay that we came by," Cole adds behind me.

"Of course," Dean replies. "Come in, take a seat. Elijah, this is Blake and her boyfriend Cole. Blake is your daddy's cousin."

"Fiancé," Cole corrects.

Dean chuckles, flinching and holding his stomach. "He doesn't know what that is."

The little boy scrunches up his adorable nose and scratches his head. "Does that mean you're my cousin too?" he asks, looking at me and ignoring Cole's comment.

"Yeah, I think so," I reply with a laugh.

"What's your name again?" he asks, tapping his chin with his little finger in contemplation.

"Blake," I respond with a smile.

"That's a boy's name!" Elijah chides. "My friend's name is Blake and he's a boy like me."

"Well, my friend Greg thinks my name is a boy name too and you know what he calls me?" I ask, placing my hands on my hips.

"What?" Elijah asks, his blue eyes opening wide.

"Cowboy!" I exclaim before erupting in laughter at the sight of his face.

"That's for a boy!" Elijah says, giggling loudly.

"Yeah, my friend is silly," I reply, ruffling his blond curly hair.

I look at Dean, who's watching me interact with his nephew with a small smile on his face. "How are you feeling?"

"I've been better," he replies with a shrug. "I got drugs and the cops off my back for now, so I guess I can't complain too much."

"They're still questioning you?" I ask in disbelief. "I told them everything that happened that night!"

"You know how it is. Don't worry about it, chick. I don't regret what I did, so whatever happens happens," he replies nonchalantly.

My mouth drops open and I stare at him, not believing what I'm hearing.

"Careful, flies can get in there," Elijah says, sticking a finger in my gaping mouth.

I back away and close it before narrowing my eyes at Dean. "You can't throw your life away because of me!"

"Chick, just stop talking for once," Dean says with a groan. "Did I ever tell you I went to law school?" he asks, changing the subject.

My eyes and my mouth drops open again before I snap it closed rapidly, not wanting a fly or Elijah's dirty hand to get in there. "No. You said you never went to school!"

"Well, I lied. I went to school, I just didn't finish, so it doesn't really count now, does it?"

"Umm...I'm pretty sure that constitutes as counting, Dean," I mutter with an eye roll.

"How far did you get?" Cole asks, sounding interested.

"Eh...I did a year before I stopped," Dean replies as he looks at his sister for confirmation.

"Yeah, I think you did a year and a half," Sandra confirms.

"Whatever. Point is, I threw my life away once already and back then it was really for nothing. This time, if anything does happen at least I'll be okay knowing that I saved a life or two," Dean finishes.

"Thank you," I respond quietly. "But I won't let you throw your life away. You need to go back and finish law school."

"Why? Are we going to open up a firm together?" Dean asks with a sly smile.

"I don't think so," Cole mutters quickly, making us all laugh.

"I'm serious, I want to help you if you're in trouble," I say firmly.

"Well, take your Bar and ace it, then we'll talk," Dean says with a wink.

"Oh! We're getting married next week!" I announce excitedly and look back to see Cole's face light up at that. "You guys are invited if you want to come."

Dean lets out a laugh. "I've never seen you this excited."

"I'm not sure I ever have been," I answer honestly.

"If Connor is invited I'll probably tag along," Sandra says with a shrug when I look at her.

"He is and you are too. Oh! Can we use your kid?" I ask, biting down on my lip.