Dear to Me (15 page)

 “What’s on your mind?”

 Melinda moistened her lips with the tip of her tongue. “You know how much I enjoy working with animals.”

 “Jah.”

 “And I want to help as many of the sick and hurting ones as I can.”

 He nodded.

 “The thing is—” She paused and drew in a quick breath. This was going to be harder than she’d expected. No wonder she had put off telling him for so long.

 “The thing is what?” Gabe prompted.

 “Well, Dr. Franklin says I have a special way with animals. He called it a ‘God-given talent.’ ”

 “He’s right about that. Look how well your daed’s horse has responded to you. And those baby bunnies are doing well under your care. Animals have a sixth sense and know when a human being cares for them.”

 Melinda felt relief that Gabe realized her capabilities. Maybe he would be receptive to the idea of her becoming a vet.

 “I do care a lot,” she admitted, “but unfortunately, I’m not able to do as much for wounded or sick animals as I would like.”

 “That’s why Doc Franklin’s available.” Gabe flicked the reins, and his horse picked up speed. “When you find an ailing critter or somebody brings an animal over to your place that has more wrong with it than you can handle, you take it to the vet.”

 Melinda clasped her hands tightly in her lap. Her throat felt so dry all of a sudden.

 “Well, if that doesn’t beat all,” Gabe said, pointing to the other side of the road. “It’s another dead
hasch
. Probably some car or a truck ran into it.”

 Melinda flinched. She hated to see dead deer, whether they were lying alongside the road after being hit by a car or hanging in someone’s barn during deer hunting season.

 “If the deer aren’t thinned enough during hunting season,” Gabe said, “they overpopulate and will soon overrun our area.” He glanced over his shoulder and pointed to the deer they’d just passed. “I’d rather see ’em shot for meat than go to waste that way, though. Wouldn’t you?”

 Melinda formulated her next words carefully. She wanted to be sure Gabe didn’t take anything she said the wrong way. “To tell you the truth, I don’t like to see
any
deer killed. We raise hogs, sheep, and cows for food, so why would anyone need to kill the deer?”

 He shrugged. “Some folks in our community prefer the taste of deer meat, and even if we do have other animals to butcher, a change is nice.”

 Melinda didn’t like the way this conversation was going, so she decided to get back to the subject she needed to discuss with Gabe. “Dr. Franklin thinks I have what it takes to become a vet.” There, it was out, and Melinda should have felt better, but she didn’t.

 A muscle in Gabe’s cheek quivered as he stared straight ahead. Was he mulling things over or trying to stay focused on the road? The buggy rolled along, and the horse’s hooves made a steady
clip-clop, clip-clop
against the pavement, but Gabe remained quiet.

 Unable to stand the silence, Melinda reached over and touched his arm. “Awhile back, the doctor gave me some information on the necessary college courses I would need to take. He told me about a couple different schools of veterinary medicine, too.”

 Gabe jerked on the reins and guided his horse and buggy to the side of the road. When they were stopped, he turned in his seat and stared hard at Melinda. “Just how far have you gone with all this? Have you already made up your mind to leave the Amish faith? Have you made application to a college?”

 She shook her head. “No, no. I would need to get my GED first, and then—”

 “So you have decided.”

 “Not yet, but Dr. Franklin says if I want something badly enough, I should be willing to make whatever sacrifices are necessary. Even if it means giving up those things that are dear to me in order to reach my goal.”

 “If you were to get the training you needed to become a vet, it would mean leaving the Amish faith and everyone you love behind.” Gabe’s shoulders slumped as he stared at the floor of his buggy. Apparently he thought this would mean the end of their relationship.

 Melinda clasped his hand. “Would you be willing to leave here with me?”

 “What?” His mouth dropped open. “How could you even suggest such a thing?”

 “I—I thought if you loved me—”

 A vein in Gabe’s temple began to throb. “You know I love you, Melinda. But I’m happy living here, and I don’t want to leave the Amish faith.” He squinted as he stared at her long and hard. “I can’t imagine you wanting to leave, either.”

 “I don’t really want to leave, but in order for me to—”

 “I asked you once if you ever missed the English world or thought you would want to go back to it someday, and you said you were happy being Amish.”

 “I—I am happy being Amish, but I can’t become a veterinarian and remain part of our faith.”

 “So I guess that means you’ll have to choose between me and the modern world.”

 Frustration welled in Melinda’s soul as she fought to keep her emotions under control. Gabe didn’t understand the way she felt at all. “It’s not the modern world I’d be choosing,” she said. “Becoming a vet would mean I could help so many animals.”

 “You’re helping some now, aren’t you?”

 “Jah, but in such a small way.”

 He shrugged. “Seems to me you ought to be happy with what you can do for the animals you’ve taken in and quit wishing for something that goes against our beliefs.”

 She lowered her head. “My folks don’t approve of my desire to care for animals. They’re always hollering at me for spending too much time caring for animals.”

 Gabe grabbed both of Melinda’s arms as a look of frustration crossed his face. “You’ve been baptized and have joined the church. You’ve made a vow to God to adhere to our church rules. If you left to become part of the English world, you’d be shunned. Have you thought about the seriousness of that?”

 “Of course I have, and it would hurt to leave my family behind.” Tears seeped out from under her lashes, and she swallowed around the constriction in her throat.

 “What do your folks have to say about this? Are they letting you go with their blessings?”

 Melinda shook her head. “I haven’t told them yet. I wanted to discuss it with you first and see if you’d be willing to—”

 “I don’t want to leave the Amish faith.” Gabe sat for several seconds with a pained expression; then his features softened some. “I’ve been working real hard and saving up money so I can start my own place of business,” he said, taking hold of her hand. “I’m doing it for us so I can make a good living and provide for the family I’d hoped we would have someday.”

 Confusion swirled in Melinda’s brain like a tornado spinning at full speed. She did love Gabe, but if he wouldn’t leave the Amish faith, then she would be completely on her own if she decided to get the necessary schooling to become a vet. And how would she pay for her classes? College was expensive, not to mention the additional training at a veterinary school. What she made working for Dr. Franklin wasn’t nearly enough, and she sure couldn’t ask her folks to help out.

 Melinda squeezed her eyes shut as a sense of shame washed over her.
That was a selfish thought. I’m not asking Gabe to leave the Amish faith so he can help me financially. I want him to support my decision because he loves me and wants to be with me no matter which world I choose to live in.

 She opened her eyes and looked at him. “Would you do me one favor, Gabe?”

 “What’s that?”

 “Would you at least pray about the matter?”

 His forehead wrinkled as his eyebrows drooped. “You want me to pray about you becoming a vet?”

 She nodded. “And ask God what His plans for you might be, too.”

 Gabe gathered up the reins. “I will pray about this, but I think right now I’d best take you home. I don’t feel like riding any farther tonight.”

 Melinda placed her hand on his shoulder. “Gabe—”

 “Jah?”

 “Please don’t say anything to my folks or anyone else about what we’ve discussed this evening, okay?”

 He gave a quick nod. “It’s not my place to do the telling. I’ll leave that up to you.”

Chapter 14

M
elinda’s hands shook as she stood in front of the birdhouse by their driveway, holding the note she had discovered from Gabe. Had he been thinking about what she’d told him concerning Dr. Franklin’s suggestion that she become a vet? Had Gabe decided that he would be willing to go English with her?

 She focused on the words he’d written:

Dear Melinda,

I spoke with your daed yesterday, and he said it would be fine if I want to help Isaiah build a dog run, since he still hasn’t found the time. He also said he thought I would do a much better job than he could, since I’m a carpenter and have the skills and proper tools.

So I plan to come by after work today and begin the project. If you don’t have anything else to do, maybe you can
keep me company. If not, then I hope we can get in a few minutes to visit when I’m done for the day.

Always yours,

Gabe

 Melinda frowned as she tucked the note inside the front of her apron. Gabe hadn’t said a word about her becoming a vet or made any mention of whether he’d made a decision regarding their situation or not. Maybe he planned to discuss it with her tonight. That could be why he’d mentioned her keeping him company and hoping to have a few minutes to visit when he was done at the end of the day.

 Melinda bent down and picked up her cat, who had been sunning herself on the grass. “You’ve got life made, you know that, Snow?”

 Snow’s only response was a soft
meow
as she opened one lazy eye and snuggled against Melinda.

 “I wish all I had to do was lie around and soak up the sun,” she said as she walked toward the house.

 “You wouldn’t be happy, and you know it.”

 Melinda smiled when she heard her grandfather’s deep, mellow voice. He sat in his favorite wicker rocking chair on the front porch snapping green beans into a bowl wedged between his knees.

 “You’re right, Grandpa. I wouldn’t be happy if I wasn’t busy,” she said as she stepped onto the porch and stood beside him. “I enjoy caring for my animals too much to sit around all day and do nothing.”

 “Speaking of your animals, have you let either of the coons go yet?”

 She nodded and sat in the chair beside him, nestling Snow in her lap. “In all fairness to Rhoda, the healthy raccoon, I released her into the woods the other day. But Reba is really lonely without her.”

 “Maybe you should let her go, too.”

 “I can’t. She’s partially blind, and I’m sure she wouldn’t make it in the woods on her own.” Melinda stroked the cat behind its left ear. “Gabe’s coming over later to help Isaiah build a dog run, so maybe once my brother’s mutt is locked away, I can let Reba roam around our place whenever I’m at home and am able to keep an eye out for her.”

 Grandpa’s bushy gray eyebrows drew together. “Do you think it’s fair to confine Isaiah’s dog so your raccoon can run free?”

 Melinda shrugged. “I suppose not, but Jericho’s been known to attack other animals, too. Don’t forget the baby bunnies I’m caring for. Jericho killed their mother, you know.”

 “That was a shame, but the dog was only doing what comes natural to him. Maybe when Gabe’s done with the dog run, he can build some other kind of pen for the coon.”

 “You mean something bigger than the cage I keep her in now?”

 “Jah. Maybe he could make it more like the cages I’ve seen at the zoo.” Grandpa dropped another bean into the bowl. “Some of those zoo cages are real nice—tree branches, scrub brush, and small pools of water inside.”

 Melinda’s heart pounded as a host of ideas skittered through her mind. How wonderful it would be if she had larger cages that were similar to the animals’ natural habitat. The critters would feel more at home until it was time to let them go free.

Gabe clucked to his horse to get him moving. He was tired after a long day at the shop. Even so, he looked forward to going over to the Hertzlers’ to build the dog run for Isaiah. It would be something different to work on for a change, and it would give him a chance to speak with Melinda. Maybe he could talk some sense into her—make her see more clearly what the consequences would be if she left the Amish faith.

 He thought about his own plans to open a woodworking shop where he could make a variety of things. What would be the point in doing that if Melinda left and he stayed behind? Without her by his side, nothing would ever be the same. He felt sure he could never be happy if he left the Amish faith, because he was Amish through and through. For Melinda, though, it might be different because she had been born into the modern world and her father had been English. Maybe Melinda didn’t have the same commitment to the Amish faith as Gabe did. Maybe she could leave it behind and never look back.

 He swallowed hard.
Why’d I have to go and fall in love with a woman who isn’t satisfied with the plain, simple life? Why can’t I set aside my feelings for her now?