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Authors: Holly J. Gill,Nikki Blaise

BOOK: Desires
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She stood up and began to walk away from him down the
path.

“Is there a problem?” she heard him say as he easily
caught up with her.

Stacie continued to walk fast away from him, trying her
hardest to quell the hideous picture that he had just painted. A worse one
arose, unbidden, of him having sex with some wrinkly old granny. Her stomach
turned. This whole thing was getting a little too much for her, beyond
degrading.

“Stacie will you slow down?” she heard him say.

She had no intentions of slowing down. She intended to
do nothing but pack up her belongings and leave the building. Clearly, she had misunderstood
what went on here.

Stacie rushed toward the conservatory, but two women came
out blocking her path. As she waited impatiently for them to move out of her
way, they began to kiss each other and grab one another’s breasts. She glanced
around. Dan was coming up fast behind her. The women looked at her and giggled,
one of them waggling her eyebrows at her as if in invitation to join them.

“Stacie, please,” Dan said.

Stacie wasn’t interested. She barged past the women,
wanting to get to the room and pack as quickly as possible. How could Dan want
to perform a disgusting act in front of an old woman? How could he? She rushed
as fast as she could down the corridors to the foyer. She didn’t even look at
the receptionists, racing up the stairs and down the corridor to the room.

Another man came hurtling out of a room. They crashed
into one another. “Hey, slow down,” he yelled at her. As she began to fall, she
felt an arm taking hold of her and she twisted her neck, to see Dan holding her
up. Stacie snatched her arm away and continued a little more sedately back to
the room. She heard the man calling out behind her. She ignored him. Her
mission was to get back to the room, get her stuff, and get the hell out the
building.

“Open the door, please,” she commanded Dan.

Without a word, Dan unlocked the door and she flew
through.

“What on earth is the matter?” Dan asked.

Stacie rushed to grab her bag, and started stuffing her
clothes in.

“Why are you leaving?”

“I just can’t handle it, okay? I didn’t realise what I was
letting myself in for.” She headed into the bathroom to gather all her beauty
products, then rushed back to her bag and threw them in.

“What do you mean?” he said, following her around the
room as she darted about collecting all her personal belongings.

“It doesn’t matter, I just need to go.”

Dan took hold of Stacie’s shoulders. “Just stop, for one
second. I need to understand what the problem is. What do you mean, you didn’t
realise what you were letting yourself in for? Please Stacie, explain. I want
to help you,” he said.

She stopped to look at him. Confusion and concern shone
from his eyes.

“I’m not into that kind of behaviour. I find it
repulsive—”

“I know you’re not, and I wouldn’t expect you to be. You’re
here to regain your confidence and self-esteem and bring back your love for sex,
nothing more.”

“Well, I’ve decided I don’t need it any longer.”

“Really?” he said, releasing her. “Very well, then. I
cannot make you stay here. But before you go, I want to tell you something. People
come here for fun, to be free. They come here to have a good time, and not to
be judged. For many people this is the only place where they can come and
relax.”

“I am not judging anyone.” Stacie bristled.

“Yes you are. Do you think they’re bothered why you’re
here?”

She stared at him, gazing into his gorgeous brown eyes. Her
desire to leave weakened. Her heart raced, her knees turned to jelly.

“You’re here for help regaining your confidence, but
they’re here for their fetish. It’s a sex club, Stacie. What did you expect? We
are all individuals and have different ideas of fun.”

“But I just want to learn to have normal sex, not
that…that…” she brandished a hand at the window, unable to find the word.

“And there is no one more than myself who wants to help
you.”

“I mean, for heaven’s sake, I get embarrassed just being
naked in front of you, let alone what they were doing.”

“Trust me, you have a great figure. You’re just lacking
in confidence.”

“I just…I do want fun and to enjoy myself…but…” she said,
attempting to look at him.

“Only you can make the decision to continue or not. I
cannot and will not coerce you. I can offer you all the guidance you require,
but the drive needs to come from you. So what that he likes being treated like
a dog. So what that the couple were having sex against the tree and the fence.
And who really cares that the girls were playing with one another. That is what
they can do here. That’s why they come. And you, Stacie, are here because you
want to feel good about yourself. Hold your head high, you have nothing…and I
mean nothing to be ashamed about.”

He continued, “It’s hard for everyone initially. I bet
those guys out there took some courage to come here like you. I bet they
hammered for days, weeks or even months to take the plunge. Desires is a place
where you can experiment with your sexual fantasies without censure. Here, you
can be whoever you want to be without shame or stigma.” His eyes were compelling
in their intensity as he tried to make her understand.

“This is starting to sound like a lecture and I’m sorry.
But it’s important that you understand before you decide. I look at Desires as a
box of treasures for us all to enjoy. No one is judged. No one even really
cares about your fantasy, whether it’s extreme fetish or just plain damn good
love-making. No one here would ever judge you for what you do or don’t do.”

“Do others come here for guidance like me?” she asked,
sitting down on the bed.

“Yes, all for different reasons. Some come because they
have no idea how to arouse themselves. Now that, you are getting good at,” he
told her, a sideways smile appearing on his lips. He waggled his eyebrows at
her. Stacie felt herself blush and she looked away.

“Hey, don’t feel ashamed,” he said, sitting next to her
on the bed and lifting her chin to look at him. “You have the right to hold
your head up high. You’ve already done the hardest part, just deciding to come
here. It’s not easy I know, and I bet it took you ages to decide.”

“It did.”

“And who’s to say those guys out there didn’t take
ages?” he said. He took hold of her hand and patted it. His touch made her
shiver.

“Can I ask you a question?” Stacie said.

“Of course. Ask away.”

She dropped her gaze to their joined hands. “Did you enjoy
masturbating in front of that old woman?”

Dan paused. “I didn’t personally get any pleasure from
it, but she was a client, and sometimes we all have to do things that we don’t
enjoy. And it made her happy, so that made me happy to be able to help her. Look
Stacie, I want to teach you. What I have done in the past and what I will do in
the future is my job. Yes, I will enjoy some clients more than others, but
that’s the nature of my job.”

“Should I be expected to have that attitude?”

“No, absolutely not. You are here for your own pleasure
and it is my job to make you happy. Just as it was my job to make her happy.”

“Do you think I’m a prude?”

“I think you need to discover who and what you are, and
no I don’t think you’re a prude. I feel you’re scared and I can hardly blame
you. Coming here is a big step for you, and Stacie,” he said, holding her hand
tighter, “I want to help you.”

Stacie lifted her head to meet his eyes. They were full
of care and compassion. “Can I have a few minutes, please?”

“Of course.” He let go of her hands and stood up. He
walked to the door and glanced back at her once, smiling briefly before
leaving.

Stacie sat on the bed, trying to figure out what to do.
What he said made sense. Her eyes had been well and truly opened in the last
hour. She had seen things she hadn’t even considered might exist. She had been
repulsed and disgusted. The things she had seen were things she would never
consider doing. But if it made the people happy, and no one was hurt, why was
it so bad? Who was she to impose her norms on other people? Yes, she wouldn’t
want to be led around collared and leashed, but who was she to tell that man he
shouldn’t?

Of course he couldn’t do it out in the street, which was
precisely why he came here. So he could pursue his fantasy in a safe place.

If she didn’t want to see it, all she had to do was stay
out of the public areas. She could just come here to the room, and be with Dan,
and not have to see anything that the other people got up to.

She lay back on the bed, and let out a deep breath.
Having made her peace with the nature of the club, there was only one more
thing worrying her. Could she deal with her growing feelings for Dan? It was
pointless to deny them any longer. She had developed a major crush. It wasn't
love, of course not. They didn’t have any kind of relationship except for a
sexual one. So, maybe she could just enjoy it while it lasted, let him teach
her what she needed to now and enjoy his hot young body. At least she would
leave with some sweet memories and hopefully a slew of techniques so, when she
finally did meet someone, she could be a tiger in the bedroom for him instead
of a mouse.

Emotionally drained, Stacie closed her eyes. It seemed
only seconds later when she jerked them open at the sound of the door. Dan
popped his head in.

“Have you had time to think?” he said, coming into the
room. In his hand he held a bottle of wine and a piece of paper.

“And?” He walked over and put the bottle of wine on the
table.

“I have decided to stay. For now,” she said and couldn’t
help smiling in response to the grin which flashed over his face.

“That’s wonderful, Stacie. I’m so glad we’ll still be
working together.”

He came over to the bed and handed her the paper. It was
the menu for the evening meal.

“I thought you might like to take a look at this. We can
eat downstairs in the restaurant, or have room service. What do you fancy?”

Panic at the thought of going into any of the public
areas flooded Stacie. “I think it would be nice to eat here, just you and me,”
she said, hoping her feelings were not evident.

“Fine with me,” Dan said. “Do you want to order now for
later?”

Stacie perused the menu. “Can you recommend anything?”

“Everything I’ve had here has always been excellent.”

“Well, you’re no help, are you?” she teased.

“Sorry.”

Stacie enjoyed their relaxed easy banter as she dithered
over the choices. She finally decided on duck à l’orange with baby roast
potatoes and trimmed beans. Dan rang the orders through, ordering a seafood
pasta medley for himself. He then opened the bottle of wine and filled their
glasses, bringing one over to her on the bed. Dan smiled and she fully expected
him to sit beside her on the bed. But instead he seated himself in one of the
chairs by the small table and watched her thoughtfully.

“How are you feeling?” he asked.

“Fine. I was just wondering what the next session will
be.”

His eyebrows flew up. “Do you feel ready for the next
session?” The look in his eyes made her blush but she kept her eyes up this
time, determined to ride it out.

“Yes.”

Dan stood up and came toward her, placing his wine glass
on the dresser and taking his usual seat on the stool. Stacie swung her legs over
the edge of the bed to face him. He took the glass of wine from her, and placed
it next to his on the dresser, before turning back and taking both her hands in
his.

“Well, if your demonstration in the bath earlier is
anything to go by, you have learned the initial lessons well. Do you feel more
comfortable masturbating now?”

She replied with a nod and an, “Mm-hmm,” as she stared
into his eyes. Even if she didn’t she would have answered in the affirmative,
desperate to get on with the next step.

“Well,” he continued, stroking his thumbs over her skin,
“feel free to say if you’re not ready for this yet, but I thought we could move
things along with a little kissing and touching. Me, that is, touching you.”
Stacie’s eyes widened and a shiver ran straight from her hands where he touched
her, to her pussy, which quivered in response. A grin split her face. “Do I
take that as a yes, from your smile?”

Stacie firmly schooled her expression, not wanting to
seem too keen. He couldn’t know she wanted him to touch her more than anything.

“I think I could do that,” she said.

He picked up their wine glasses and passed hers over. She
all but gulped it down, eager to begin. Dan drained his glass of wine and put
the empty glasses back on the dresser. Stacie wriggled back on the bed, lying
down eagerly, leaving him plenty of room. He came back and eased himself onto
the bed beside her, propping himself up on his elbow. She mirrored his posture,
staring into his eyes.

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