Enough Isn't Everything (Everything Trilogy) (25 page)

Saffy
 and Holly were keen to go; Alfie was definitely a charmer. Will had some split loyalties and wondered how I felt about it, given Alfie’s previous treatment of me.

I initially complained that I was tired and was going to head home, but
from the response from our group, I didn’t feel I could object anymore so I went along with it.

I sat quietly in Will’s car on the way over. When we got to Alfie’s
place, though, Will found me and squeezed my hand, because he kind of knew I didn’t want to be there. “Are you okay with this?” I nodded, a reassurance to him as I still tried to convince myself that I was. I had to keep reminding myself to act as if I hadn’t been in his house before.

It was weird walking through the door that Alfie had pressed me into so playfully.
 I glanced at the stairs. Heat stirred in my core again as I became overwhelmed by the memory of him carrying me up them. Remembering all the things we did together in his room directly above this one made me want to do them again.

I blushed as the memories came back and caught him smirking into his beer bottle when his eyes caught mine for a second. His eyes flicked to the stairs and rolled up toward the ceili
ng as if reading my mind again.

Initially, he
didn’t pay attention to me. Well, that’s not entirely true, his attention was demanded by everyone else in the group. Especially when they found out how popular his band was becoming as they supported major artists in the states.

I was g
enuinely pleased for him with that, because he was definitely talented from what I’d heard. He was an exceptional singer, so I could only imagine how great he’d be with a band backing him.

I was already a fan of his lyric writing as well. I’d heard a few more of his songs
, and they stacked up. As a fellow musician, I couldn’t deny that he was exceptional.

Will brought me
 a white wine spritzer, but my quirk had always been to have crushed ice in it.

“Sorry, is there any ice?” Alfie motioned toward the kitchen, still holding his beer bottle
, and gesturing in the direction of the kitchen with his index finger.

“Sure, there’s a dispenser in the fridge.” I blushed
again, because this was a pretense, and I knew that.

I wandered into the kitchen
. It was beyond weird, being here, being familiar with all his things and pretending not to know anything. I just had to keep telling myself over and over that I could do this.

This was a normal gathering of
 a group of friends, nothing crazy about it. We would just drink, chat, and go home. What made it different was that I had been here before. No one else in the room was aware that I had mindblowing sex with Alfie, or that I knew him intimately.

I’d had the wildest sex with the amazing looking guy who
was hosting this little get-together, and he was acting as if he didn’t really know me.

My
 concentration was gone again, when the crushed ice spattered out of the dispenser, and spilled over my blouse at breast level missing my glass.
Shit! 
The ice immediately melted, leaving quite a see-though area in the front, my lacy bra showing through
.
 

I leaned over the counter to get some
paper kitchen towel, and I felt a hand slide around my waist. The strong hands pulled me back into an erect male body. His scent told me that it was Alfie.

My breath hitched
, and I held it. My eyes fluttered closed, my heartbeat stuttered for a second and pounded rapidly in my chest, but I didn’t move.

He swept
 my hair to the side, exposing the nape of my neck. His fingers left a tingling, burning sensation on my skin. Familiar bumps appeared in the wake of the trail like a rash. I could feel his hot breath on my neck as he moved his head forward, bending to kiss the soft spot behind my ear.

I felt his lips
curl into a smile on my neck. His breath became hotter and more ragged as it dispersed on my skin in short pants. White heat shot through my body as I flushed. This turned me on so much that I fought with everything I had not to turn into him.

Feeling his hands on me
 was so amazingly perfect. His arms wrapped around my waist, and as fast as he held me, he was gone. I had never even caught sight of him during the whole interaction.

He
 left me standing breathless and shaken. I tried to steady myself. My legs were weak, and I could feel my heartbeat in my mouth. My fingertips were white as I clung to the countertop trying to gather my thoughts.

I heard him talking in the living room again as if nothing had happened,
while I stood where he left me. My heartbeat continued to pound hard with the breathless effect he’d had on me.

I must have stayed there longer than I should have, because when I managed to go back to the group,
Will mouthed, “Are you okay?”

I plastered my best smile on, and mouthed back, “Sure.” I placed my glass to my lips and sipped the wine, minus the ice I’d gone to get.

I think Will would have noticed more going on, if it hadn’t been for Saffy. She was hanging on his neck, and I think he had his own distractions with her.

Alfie looked directly at me
. “Lily, what’s been the hardest part of today for you?” I blushed at his double meaning, and as the focus was on me, I knew exactly what he was doing.

Trying to look
 confident and unaffected by what he’d just done to me. “Nothing really, I mean, there is nothing hard that I can’t handle. If something is perceived to be hard, I usually deal with it by breaking it down to bite-sized chunks,” I responded deadpan.

He grinned
 widely and held his bottle up saluting me, as if I’d won that round. I was instantly annoyed by how turned on I was just by looking at his fucking adorable, smiling face.

He was about to place his beer on the counter, but turned his head sideways to look at me
. He lifted the bottle again in a second salute before flinging his head back to take a big swig of his beer.

Alfie smiled into his bottle again, holding it to his lips,
while his eyes continued to bore into mine. I could hear his breath as air escaped his nose onto the bottle neck as he breathed raggedly.

Saffy
 decided she wanted to be under Will, literally. He must have been in agreement, because he suddenly wanted to leave too, and ushered us both in the direction of the front door.

He placed his hand on my back in guidance, but Alfie positioned himself in front of the door as I was
walking out.

Everyone else was either in the process of leaving or standing on the sidewalk getting into cars when he placed his hand on the small of
 my back. He slipped it under my t-shirt and traced the waistline of my jeans. My breath hitched, and I tried to move away without being obvious.

His
 other hand slid down around to my crotch and between my legs, the seam digging into me.  My sensitive flesh became swollen and ached for him to do more. I stifled a moan.

He made
it look like he was scratching his nose and leaned in. “You’re arousal smells fucking awesome,” he whispered.

I managed to keep my face expressionless, shocked and stunned at the liberty he had taken with my body, but determined not to make a scene. I gripped his hand and pulled it away, pushing it down
before anyone saw it.

His face came near me, his breathing a little ragged. To the others it may have looked like he was being friendly. “You still want me, don’t you? Say it and I’m yours…anytime
,” he whispered.

I looked at him, smiled sweetly,
and said, “Thanks again, Alfie…Goodnight.” I didn’t remember much about getting to Will’s car, just that I flicked onto autopilot to get there. Once seated, I fought to keep my breath even. My senses had gone into overdrive.

Will glanced over at me. “You’re quiet tonight Lily, everything okay?” I sighed. “Yeah, it’s been a long day Will, I’m just tired.” He nodded and let me continue in silence,
while he and Saffy debated whether he’d stay at our place or go home. Once I was home, and closing my bedroom door, my cell buzzed.

SEXPERT: You felt so good in my hands tonight and you smelled so fucking amazing…I wanted nothing more than your legs wrapped around my waist.

Pink Lady: Exactly who do you think you are, don’t you ever touch me again. I don’t want you to touch me… last thing I want is my legs wrapped around anything to do with you. If you do that again, I will scream sexual assault.

SEXPERT: Your head might not have wanted it, but your body most definitely wanted me badly… why didn’t you call me on it? If we’d been alone, I would most definitely have taken you tonight, and you would have let me.

Pink Lady: What do you want from me?

SEXPERT: I want to ride you so hard until you scream my name… but I’m a realist, we’re not F B anymore, so we’ll be friends.

Pink Lady: Hmm, I don’t think so.

SEXPERT: Sure we will. See you on campus tomorrow. BTW: Will= new FB? What does he have that I don’t? I’m interested to know.

I wasn’t even going to dignify that with an answer, this was the second time he’d implied something was going on with us. I was exhausted and mentally drained from his games. I slipped out of my clothes, too tired to do anything but brush my teeth.

I slid
 my legs between the cool sheets unable to comprehend fully what happened tonight. I was numb, and I couldn’t even cry. He frustrated me with his contact.

I was doing well to control my feelings for him, but now
that he had turned up the heat again with his games, it was leaving me feeling scared that I’d cave in to him.

I was determined not to allow him to pull me back into something I wasn’t able to handle. So again, I turned over, curled myself up
, and lay thinking about the one thing that I’d never have with him.

I arrived on campus
 the next morning still mulling over what had happened last night and, as usual, Will was waiting for me. He was staring up at the stormy grey sky, looking annoyed about something, and I jumped to the assumption that he’d had another argument with Saffy.

She wanted to have more control over their relationship, but Will was standing his ground. “Hey, Will.” He gave me a small smile, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“I’m all the better for seeing your sweet face honey. I had to drag my ass away from Saffy’s whining this morning. I’m into her, but not into her clingy ways.” I leaned up and rubbed his shoulder. He bent forward, giving me an affectionate little head bump, and left it to rest there for a moment with his eyes closed.

As usual with Will’s PDA, Alfie seemed to appear
out of nowhere. I immediately felt guilty, although I didn’t know why. I thought it might be because he saw me being affectionate with Will. Alfie obviously thought I had moved on with Will.

His texts last night hadn’t helped these feelings I had about my relationship with Will
. I settled for thinking that it was because I didn’t want Will to become embroiled in Alfie’s tangled mind. I wasn’t sure of the real reason, but I just felt weird.

“Hey
,” he cooed. He looked up. “We’re going to have a storm today.” I was wondering what his game plan was this morning. Alfie’s eyes flicked between us. He scowled, his eyes shifting between us darkly. “So Will what’s the deal? You and Lily got it going on?” he said, pointing his index finger and moving it back and forth between us.

Will looked at me, then at Alfie
. “Hell no, we’re the best of friends.” He looked awkwardly at me. “I’m with Saffy.” Alfie’s face showed sudden realization and smiled at him, looking more relaxed.

Mandy called out to Will from across the lawn.
 He turned and gave me a questioning look. “You want to see what she needs, Will?” I said, flicking my chin in her direction, giving him permission to leave us.

As soon as Will was out of earshot, Alfie rubbed his hands together, his head down looking at them, then tilted his head to look at me. “Do you remember me fucking you Lily?” His voice was low and seductive. To onlookers we would have been talking about any mundane thing.

I stood straighter and was a little shocked at his crude question. I shrugged, embarrassed, not wanting to rehash our encounters. Of course I remembered. I never thought much about anything else when I saw him.

He fixed his gaze and sneered.
 “Well? What? You do… you don’t… you’re indifferent?” he hissed, his eyes darting to where Will was, and then back to me.

I swallowed hard, his nearness ma
king me unable to think
.
 “Yes,” I said quietly.

“Which part?”
He searched my eyes with his eyes.

“Of course I remember. It isn’t as if I’d done a lot of that before
,” I said quietly.

Alfie smiled.
 “I remember as well, Lily. Although, I had… done a lot… well, you know…” He straightened and stuffed his hands into his leather jacket pockets, smirking at me.

I didn’t know where this
 was going until he exhaled hard. “You felt all those amazing feelings 
with
 me. I wasn’t there on my own,” he said, shaking his head at me.

I blushed at his words.
 “You’re going to throw this back at me now, to try to have me again? You wanted no ties, Alfie… you’ve got them.”

His voice was husky. “No ties, right. It doesn’t mean I don’t want those feelings… you want those feelings again, Lily, don’t you?”

I shook my head. “I, one hundred percent, don’t want that with you, like that, with no feelings involved. I don’t want to be ‘mind fucked’ by you either, Alfie.” My voice was echoing the anger he was instilling in me.

I stared at him, fighting with everything I had to keep myself strong.
 “I just want to be left alone to study and have a normal life. You’re killing me with this.” My voice was low and angry. I turned on my heels and walked in Will’s direction, leaving him standing with his arms crossed, staring smugly at me.

My heart pounded as I was making my way to them, but the skies opened and the rain came down so hard
. The ground became saturated, covering the lawn with a few inches of rain in seconds. Will and Mandy had turned and were disappearing into a building behind them, and I had to turn and make my way back to the one nearest the car park.

I had
 just cleared the first door to start to make my way inside, when a hand grabbed my wet, slippery arm and pulled me behind the heavy, wedged open door on the porch. Alfie swung me around, pinning me to the wall behind the door by his hips. The cramped space meant I had nowhere to go.

His
 hands slammed either side of my head, caging me in. He offered a slow sexy smile, his expression turning intense the longer we stood there. He didn’t speak, just did that intense-stare-thing he does. “Stay here. The rain won’t last long,” he whispered huskily.

I could feel he was hard by the bulge that kept brushing against me. The feeling was so tantalizing and sweet, yet it stung. I didn’t move.

I was breathless from running, the rain, and him. My chest heaved as I panted to compensate for the oxygen loss. My body hummed in anticipation and awareness of him, and I struggled to keep myself from shaking.

His closeness, his familiar smell, his beautiful face
– it was too much. I closed my eyes briefly, because it hurt to look at how fucking intoxicating I found him. When I opened them and focused, it was on his hair.

I didn’t want to look in his eyes and see the lust that he’d probably see
reflected back at him in mine. So…avoiding his gaze, I stared at his soaking wet hair, and immediately wanted to run my fingers up the back of it.

Spots of rain dripped off the ends of some strands and ran down his neck. It teased me
, and I wanted to lean in and press my mouth to his neck to catch them.

His
t-shirt clung to his fabulous hard body, and his defined abs were visible. I stood frozen on the spot, mesmerized by him. He was so delicious.