Everything Changes (5 page)

Justin looked at Parker who nodded but said
nothing.

That was when I took in his early morning, drowsy
appearance. He was dressed in dark gray cargo shorts with a white T-shirt that
had some racing logo splattered across the front of it and gray Reef sandals.

Justin elbowed him when he didn’t say anything.
“Okay?”

Parker glared but smiled. “Sounds good to me.” He
gave a tip of his head to his truck, gesturing me to get in.

He yawned, stretching his arms above his head as
he waited for us. Naturally my eyes went south trying to catch a peek at his
stomach. I wasn’t disappointed. It was just a peek, but I could see the sharp
lines of muscles and a little patch of hair below his belly button that I
wanted to explore.

It was going to be a long ride to Moab with those
thoughts in my head.

Parker and Justin sat up front while
Addy
and I squeezed in the backseat. Thank goodness his
truck was a four door because with a twenty-one hour drive ahead of us, it
wouldn’t have been very comfortable.

We ended up going further south than Olympia and
pulled off I-5 in Rochester to eat at a restaurant called the
Red Barn.
During the thirty-minute drive, I caught myself staring in the review mirror
watching Parker from a distance. With one hand on the steering wheel and the
other rubbing back and forth across his bottom lip, he kept his eyes on the
road and never looked up. Thankfully. I didn’t want to get caught staring at
him, but I also couldn’t tear my eyes from him.

Here we were crammed in a truck together when not
more than a few days ago we hadn’t even spoken to one another.

Addy
had
maps and brochures spread all over the table before the waiter came by to take
our order. “Where the hell did all this come from? It’s like you’re a tour
guide or something,” I said, laughing.

Parker and Justin chuckled when
Addy
glared at me.
                         

“You guys laugh now but you haven’t traveled with
her before.” I warned.

“What can I get you to drink?” The waiter flipped
his tablet open as our laughs drifted through the empty restaurant.

“I’ll just have water,” I told him, picking up
one of the maps with white water rafting on it.

Parker cleared his throat and moved a little
closer to me, his breathing light.
 
I
felt my eyes dart to him with every motion he made, scrutinizing what he was
thinking and doing.

Addy
ordered water and a small orange juice. She was diabetic so any time she took
her medication before she ate, she made sure to drink orange juice as well just
in case her meal didn’t arrive in a timely manner.

“I’ll have a black coffee,” Justin said, smiling
at
Addy
.

“Water, please,” Parker said softly, looking over
the menu.

I suddenly had a pair of brass balls and asked,
“Do you even like coffee?”

Parker looked up and me and winked, his smile
hidden by his hands that his chin rested on. “I don’t drink coffee.”

Addy
giggled beside me causing Justin to laugh too. “I told you.”

“So…you bought coffee from me every morning and
what…dumped it out?”

“Justin drank it,” was Parker’s quiet response.
He looked embarrassed and uncomfortable, pretty much that same as me.

“I think what Parker is trying to say, Rowan,”
Justin began, but Parker elbowed him which caused him to cough and clutch his
side. “Nothing.” Justin choked. “Fuck man…” he gave Parker a glare “...Parker
wasn’t saying anything.”

My cheeks flushed as did Parker’s. He sat back
slowly and ran his hands through his hair as if he was nervous about my
reaction.

The rest of breakfast I didn’t say a word and
neither did Parker. Justin and
Addy
had the entire
trip planned out, and we were on our way to Boise an hour later, still not
talking. I was surprised at how easily Justin and Addy’s conversations flowed
as if they’d known each other for years. I was jealous that I couldn’t pull my
head out of my ass and actually speak to Parker.

By noon, we had made it to The
Dalles
stopped for food again. This time we made it quick
in order to make it to Boise before sundown.

It took longer than we expected when we finally
found a campground
Addy
was okay with. She had high
expectations of a bathroom, which none of them had. Eventually, we found one
she was satisfied with, and we were able to set up our campsite.

“Where does this pole go?”
Addy
held up the pole, turning to Justin. She was trying to put the tent up while
Parker and I got the fire going.

I should re-phrase that. Parker got the fire
going. I simply watched in awe at his boy scout skills.

After cooking hotdogs and hamburgers with the
fire he made, we sat around talking.

I watched Parker carefully that night. For being
a seventeen-year-old boy, he seemed to carry the weight of the world on his
shoulders, and I wasn’t sure why. I began to realize that the quiet shy side
was a protective side as well.

He watched me just as carefully and listened
intently to everything I said.

When I got up to get water, he did too and asked
if I needed help. When I had to go to the bathroom and
Addy
didn’t, he walked with me so I wasn’t alone.

That’s when he spoke again.

“I bought the coffee for Justin,” he said when I
came back out, glancing at me doubtfully.

We stopped in the darkness. The moonlight seemed
to provide just enough light so I could make out his outline but I couldn’t see
his eyes.

The darkness acted as a shield and gave us the
courage to speak openly, something neither of us were comfortable with. “To see
me,” I deduced optimistically.

“Yes, to see you.”

CHAPTER
3

Rowan Jensen

Tire
Wall

This is a wall of tires
that are bound together on the side of the track. The tire wall is designed to
absorb the impact of bikes that hit it after spinning off the track.

June
20, 1997

“I hate you, you stupid snoring little person,” I
muttered mostly to myself.

Though I wanted her to, there was no way
Addy
could hear me with the horrific nasally noises coming
from her.

Addy
and I
slept in a tent together that first night. After that, I bought my own tent and
slept by myself. For being so tiny, I couldn’t understand how she could sound
like that. I mean seriously, she sounded like a damn freight train every time
she took a breath.

That morning, I sat by the fire trying to boil
water for coffee when Parker emerged from his tent with Justin, wearing nothing
but a pair of jeans.

When he noticed me, he quickly pulled on a hooded
sweatshirt.

I finally got a glimpse, and no, I wasn’t
disappointed. He could easily pose for the cover of a muscle and fitness
magazine.

In a form of acknowledgment, he tipped his head
towards me with a smile before walking down a gravel road towards the
bathrooms.

When he returned, he sat down next to me in a
folding chair. “So the coffee girl drinks coffee as well?”

“Yeah.” I gave him a half smile, wishing the
water would just boil already. “You don’t want to know me if I
haven’t
had coffee.”

He shrugged, leaning forward so his elbows were
resting on his knees, his head hanging as if his neck was sore. “You seem
normal enough right now.”

“Just wait.” I moved the pan around the metal
crate, holding it above the flames, hoping it would magically hit the right
spot. “If this damn thing doesn’t boil soon, I may turn into a less than pleasant
version of myself.”

Parker chuckled, shifting around in the chair to
get comfortable. “I can’t imagine a less pleasant version of you.”

“You just wait. A few weeks with me and you will
probably change your mind.”

Looking over at him, I noticed he was smiling.
His hand ran through his hair as he pulled the hood of his sweatshirt over his
head, still smiling. “I’ll take my chances.”

We talked about the weather in Moab. I was
curious having never been there, but I couldn’t focus on much of what he was
saying. Instead, I was watching the shift of his body as he fidgeted with the
strings on his sweatshirt and the rise and fall in his chest as he spoke.

The way he talked about the town made me eager to
see the trails and the appeal they held for riders and the tiny glimpse I
received into the passion Parker held for it. I only registered about every
third word he said, but still, the fact that we were talking had an impact on
me. It made me want to ride and take in the sights, smells, and details he was
referring to. I felt like I had missed something in the conversation when he
smiled, but I was absorbing his details, tasting his words as they were meant
for me, a key to an undiscovered world of who he was.

Soon,
Addy
and Justin
were up, which meant Parker quit talking to me. I began to get annoyed with
their presence. It seemed anytime they were around, Parker clammed up.

“Rowan.” Justin was laughing because I still
hadn’t got the water to boil. “There’s a coffee stand up the road. We can get
you coffee when we stop for breakfast.”

My eyes focused on Parker who was gazing out at
the campground watching a group of boys on their bikes and smiling. Though he
wasn’t looking at me, I tried to glare but the smoke from the fire only made
them water. “You knew there was a coffee stand, didn’t you?”

My remark drew his attention to me. His smile
grew wider but he didn’t speak as he examined my face for my reaction.

I wanted to flip him off but instead settled on,
“You suck.”

Stupid boy and his adorable smiling
.

That stupid boy and his smiling had me confused.
I couldn’t focus around that smile, and then when I looked into the entrancing
eyes, I fell.

Every move he made, I fell harder and harder. It
was easy to love him. How could it not be? Parker was the type of guy that was
shy, but he had a confidence about him I couldn’t ignore. Those traits together
were what made him so alluring to me. I wanted to know the shy boy, and I
wanted to show that confident boy just how well I could handle a two-stroke, if
you know what I mean.

June
21, 1997

It was shortly after nine Saturday morning when
we finally finished breakfast and headed to Salt Lake City. Justin and
Addy
seemed to be getting along pretty well, so Parker
pulled me aside when they were using the rest room before we left.

For a brief moment, my nerves got the best of me.
I felt tingly all over, wondering what he was going to say to me.

“Justin wants to sit with
Addy
in the backseat.” His eyes dropped from mine to the gravel. “Will you sit up
front with me?”

“If you want me to.” My voice sounded like a
timid animal, if animals could talk.

“Well…” A smile tugged at the corners of his
mouth, his head still bent forward, avoiding my gaze. “The only other option is
the back of my truck so…” His voice faded when his eyes met mine.

“The front sounds good.”

It did sound good. It sounded awesome.

With the windows rolled down, Parker and I sat in
comfortable silence while
Addy
and Justin did God
knew what behind us. I didn’t bother looking.

Trying to break the awkwardness between us, I
decided to talk about riding, dirt bike riding. Something I knew Parker would
find interest in.

“How long have you been racing?”

Parker’s eyes darted to mine, surprised I was
speaking to him. Shifting in the seat, I turned towards him slightly, trying to
let him know I was initiating conversation.

“I started riding when I was around three,”
Parker answered, keeping his eyes on the road.

“Wow, that’s young. I think I rode my first bike
when I was ten. Rick got it for me for my birthday that year.”

Parker gave a nod and a soft smile, but he didn’t
appear as though he was going to say anymore, so I tried a little more.

“So you started when you were three…when did you
move up?”

“Move up?” His brow arched in question.

“When did you start racing Supercross?”

“I started in BMX and then I raced Motocross from
nine to fourteen and started in the 125cc lite series when I was fourteen until
this last year.”

“What are you racing next year?”

He was quiet for a few minutes before he shifted
in his seat and leaned against the center console towards me. He lowered his
voice enough so Justin and
Addy
couldn’t hear him. “I
lost my sponsorship this last year, so we’ll see what comes up.”