Eye Candy (63 page)

Music emanated from a massive party tent, and Danny and Candy made their way slowly toward it, saying hello to fellow revelers as they went. They exchanged hellos and hugs and high-fives with Tim and Maggie, Isaac, Nik, Gali, Copper, and Turing.

Danny spoke to Turing. “You look positively radiant in that dress.”

“Thank you. It was a gift from the President. I told him it was either this or a quarter million dollars in the national swear jar.”

“Good choice,” said Candy.

They all strolled together, and soon joined Rory and Harley, Floyd and Susannah, Bernard, Zammy and Delilah, Rony and Poo, Rukara, and Bella, all of whom were standing around a docile yet very large robotic dragon.

Both Rony and Harley boasted round, pregnant bellies.

“Danny, Candy,” said Rory, “I’d like you to meet someone.” A man Danny had never met stepped forward. “This is Larry.”

Larry surveyed Danny’s look of confusion, and said, “I’m the guy who shit himself.”

“Oh!” said Danny. “Yes, nice to meet you.” Danny shook hands with Larry. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“Who hasn’t?” Larry asked. “This is my wife Charlotte.”

Charlotte shook hands with Danny and Candy. “Nice to meet you.”

“So have you had any more unfortunate incidents?” Danny asked.

“Oh, no,” Larry replied. “Charlotte and I both became vegetarians. No more Teriyaki cat for me. I understand you’ve met Angus.”

“Angus?” Danny asked.

“Past presidents enjoyed having a dog in the White House,” said Poo, “but a giant robotic dragon is a first. I think the founding fathers would be proud.”

“Or dinner,” said Bella.

“Presidental shishkabobs,” said Rukara. His tuxedo was resplendent with tiny white lights.

“Nice tux,” said Danny.

“Thanks,” said Rukara. “Made it myself. His, too.” Rukara pointed at Angus. Angus wore an illuminated white bowtie around his neck.

“Very dapper,” said Candy. “How are the babies?”

“Fine,” Rony and Harley replied in unison. Poo rested a hand gently on Rony’s stomach. Rory did the same to Harley.

“When are you guys due?” Candy asked.

“Valentine’s Day,” said Poo.

“Only three weeks away,” said Candy, “how exciting.”

“I was going to get her chocolate-covered strawberries, but I decided on a child instead,” said Poo.

“And with Harley’s ultra-competitive nature,”–Rory put his hands over Turing’s ears–“Harley had her way with me every night for three months trying to get pregnant. Not that I’m complaining. I mean, look at her; she’s beautiful. And her tits are huge.” Rory and Harley kissed passionately. Maggie attempted to cover Turing’s eyes. Turing did her best to peek between her mother’s fingers.

A young woman in a bright red dress joined the group and stood beside Bernard. Bernard put one arm around her. “Miss Candy, Mister Olivaw, this is Prima.” Danny and Candy took turns shaking hands with Prima. “Thank you for helping me to believe that anything is possible.”

“You’re welcome,” said Candy. She gave Bernard a big hug.

Danny leaned close to Floyd. “Where’s Howard?”

“In the tent,” replied Floyd. “He and his new stomach are hitting the buffet.”

Candy and Danny excused themselves and made their way through the party goers. Candy gently caressed her stomach. “Don’t worry. In seven months, it’ll be our turn.”

Danny smiled.

Gradually, they made their way to the entrance of the party tent.

“Sure you’re ready to do this?” Danny asked. “There’s a lot of people in there who’re gonna be watching.”

“I’m ready if you’re ready,” Candy replied.

“I’m with you. So I’m ready.”

“Let’s do it, Mr. Olivaw.”

“After you,
Mrs
. Olivaw.”

Hand in hand, Danny and Candy stepped through the entrance.

The interior of the tent was all warmth and soft lights and revelry on a broad dance floor surrounded by tables and chairs. A long buffet spanned one side of the tent, abundant with more food than Danny had ever seen assembled in one place. Smack-dab in the middle of the buffet stood Howard. He wore a tuxedo with long tails, and held a plate piled high with food. In his other hand he held a silver fork, and used it to shovel food into his mouth. He spotted Danny and Candy, smiled a big, broad, happy smile, and waved his fork in the air. Danny and Candy smiled and waved back.

Surrounding Howard and also hitting the buffet were a large group of men in tuxedos. Over their tuxedos they wore red and gold football jerseys. A long banner hung above the buffet table:
CONGRATULATIONS WORLD CHAMPIONS 2048!

At the head of the dance floor was a stage. Upon the stage, Blackie, Whitey, Kong, and VanCat were performing one of their favorite numbers. People on the dance floor were dancing. Blackie and the guys wore tuxedos in various states of completion.

Blackie wore pants but no shirt, only a bowtie and white shirt cuffs.

Whitey wore a tuxedo jacket with long tails but his pants had been cut into shorts. His hair was purple. He cradled his bass guitar he was thrumming and slapping as he rocked his head wildly in time to the beat pounded out by Kong’s drums.

Kong wore a tuxedo jacket and bowtie as well, but no shirt. His tuxedo coat was sleeveless, providing full range of motion for his monstrous arms.

VanCat boasted a fine tuxedo jacket as well as pants, though he, too, seemed to have opted for no shirt. He swayed in place with his eyes closed, feeling the music as all four hands played all twenty-four strings on both necks of his one-of-a-kind guitar.

Danny spotted Moshe and Tikva on the dance floor, close to the stage, alongside Helen and Sparky, Romeo, and Oberon. Moshe, Sparky, Romeo, and Oberon wore classic tuxedoes with white ties. Tikva and Helen each wore dazzling evening gowns.

“There they are,” said Danny.

Tikva noticed Danny and Candy and waved. She alerted Moshe, Helen, Sparky, Romeo, and Oberon, all of whom began waving wildly.

Kong finished the tune with a powerful, staccato drum solo, and the song ended.

“Thank you,” Blackie spoke into the microphone. “This next tune goes out to all the lovers and the players out there. And we’d like to dedicate it to two very special people who are simply perfect together. It’s called
Dance, Dance, Dance
.”

The song began with four soulful, echoing notes on VanCat’s guitar, repeated.

Whitey came in on the bass.

Kong’s drums joined in.

Blackie began to sing.

The song unfolded, becoming a peppy funk jam interspersed with a beautiful melody. Blackie’s red eyes gleamed as he sang about the holiness of lovers being in love, always and forever.

Together, Danny and Candy strode onto the dance floor.

Danny and Candy began to rock and sway, feeling the music, letting their bodies move at will and without thought.

The others also took to the dance floor. Rory and Harley; Tim and Maggie, Isaac, Nik, Gali, Copper, and Turing; Floyd and Susannah; Howard; Zammy and Delilah; Atom; Blendo; Rony and Poo; Rukara; Bella; Bernard and Prima; Canary and Laura; Larry and Charlotte.

Danny and Candy danced, surrounded by their friends.

Whitey, Kong, and VanCat eased into a rhythmic jam. Blackie took the mic. “Ladies and gentlemen, thank you all for being here this evening. If everyone would please rise.”

The guests seated around the dance floor stood. The rear of the tent was cozy with all the attendees who had come in from the lawn.

“Right now,” said Blackie, “I have the distinct pleasure of making two very important introductions. First, coming to the dance floor, the most caring, hardworking, devoted politician I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. . . . Put your hands together, please, for Vice President David Stein!”

Everyone clapped and cheered. Two spotlights illuminated as David ran onto the dance floor and dropped to his knees, executing a perfect power slide. David got to his feet and took a bow.

“And now, ladies and gentlemen,” said Blackie, “put your hands together for the Nobel Peace Prize winner for 2048, one of the most amazing and influential men of all time, and the fifty-first president of the United States of Americaaaaaa . . . President Les Grossmannnnn!!!”

Les stepped onto the dance floor, lit by the spotlights. His tuxedo jacket had been abandoned, leaving his white shirt, black suspenders, and matching cummerbund. His bowtie was absent and his shirt sleeves had been rolled up. Sunglasses concealed his eyes, gleaming in the spotlights. He had lost weight (and most of his body hair), and a lean, muscular physique was evident beneath his white shirt.

Les began to move with the beat, bobbing his head in time. He reached into his shirt and withdrew a gold medal that hung about his neck. He joined the other dancers on the floor.

Blackie and the guys resumed the song in full tempo.

Les slapped a crisp high-five with Danny, kissed the back of Candy’s hand, and then executed a perfect backflip, landed in the splits, and came back up to his feet dancing.

Danny and Candy joined Les in the celebration, as did everyone. Poo went so far as to leap into the air, kicking off his shoes in a fit of joy.

Surrounded by their friends, Danny and Candy danced, danced, danced, danced all night long, yes all night long.