Falling In (20 page)

“Is it just me, or do you feel weird?” he asks as he shuts the door, his back flattened against it.

“No, it’s definitely not just you.” I chuckle anxiously.

“Maybe we just need to get it over with.”

“Get
what
over with?”

“This.” He says, right before ramming his mouth back to mine. His lips move more aggressively than before as he hooks his hand around my neck, pulling me closer. I try to match his pace, feverishly stroking my tongue against his. With our arms wrapped around each other, we keep walking backwards, completely oblivious to our surroundings. We’re lost in the moment, until I bang my ass hard against a side table.

“Shit!”

“Are you okay?”

We both break the kiss and speak at the same time before exploding into a fit of giggles. I let go of him to rub my sore ass, which only makes him laugh harder at me. I punch him in the shoulder. He stops laughing and winces in what I’m sure is mock pain.

“For a little pixie, you pack a mean punch.” He rubs his arm as I continue to massage my ass.

“Pixie?” I ask with raised eyebrows.

“Yeah, that’s what I call you when you’re not around. My wild-haired pixie. You know, because you’re so petite and dainty. When you walk, it’s as if you’re floating on clouds. You’re graceful and fairylike. You’re almost always barefoot—which drives me wild, by the way. And then of course, there’s your hair—”

“My hair?”

“When you wear it down, it’s wild and carefree. Completely untamed. Perfect curls for days. It’s beautiful. Magical. Hence the name.”

He trails his finger down the bridge of my nose before kissing it softly. I’m completely speechless.
His wild-haired pixie
? I just stare at him in wonder. The way this man sees me is immaculate. Breathtaking. No one has ever described me the way that he just has. It gives me chills. I kiss his lips tenderly, deliberately, hoping to convey all that I am feeling right now. When I release him, I rest my forehead against his, our heavy breathing matching each other’s.

“Thank you for seeing me the way that you do.”

“Thank you for being you. And for giving me today—even if it’s just today.”

My stomach rumbles again, even louder than the last time, breaking the moment and reminding us both why we came back here. Without a word, Jake grabs my hand, leading me to the kitchen.
Always the kitchen with us
. He picks me up like I’m a bag of feathers and sets me on the counter with a squeal. I watch him raid the fridge and pantry, pulling out what looks like to be dozens of ingredients. He looks so comfortable in here, and calm. At peace. I could watch him all day. He moves around the kitchen almost elegantly. Like it’s a natural extension of himself.

“What are you making me today, chef?”

“It’s a surprise.”

He looks up from cutting broccoli and stares at me deeply, contemplatively. He looks like he’s about to say something but changes his mind at the last minute, shaking his head as he returns to his task.

“What? What were you going to say just now?”

“It’s nothing.”

“No, it was something. Tell me.”

He sighs, placing his knife onto the cutting board and walks the two steps it takes to get to me. He parts my legs to accommodate his body and settles between them. When his eyes reach mine, they’re glimmering with an adoration that makes my heart pound in my chest.

“I was just going to say that I think you look perfect right now. You look like you belong. In this kitchen. With me. Making you lunch. I could do this every day. I
wish
I could do this every day.” He draws his index finger downward, from my cheekbone to my jaw.

I close my eyes, relishing his touch and the tiny prickles that follow the trail. I don’t say anything because I don’t know what to say. I can’t lie to him and say I wish for that, too. Nor can I say that I don’t wish for that, because honestly, I do. I want Jake, I really do want him and all that comes with him—but I have Cole. I
need
Cole.
And yes, damn it, I want him, too
. How can I want two men, who are both equally wonderful, in completely different ways?
Is that it—I want them because they’re different? Because they make me feel different?
I don’t know.
I have no fucking clue
. All I do know is that I need to figure this out. Sooner, rather than later, because I have this dreaded feeling that the other shoe’s about to drop.
And it’s not going to be pretty
. It’s going to be bad, like dropping a Manolo in a pile of pig shit bad.

I try to shake the nagging fear that keeps knocking on my heart by focusing all of my energy on the man in front of me. Thankfully it works more than it probably should, because seeing and feeling his body next to me as he prepares our food, his arms flexing as he chops vegetables and chicken, is an aphrodisiac.

I mean, damn.

I don’t think anyone has ever made cracking and whisking eggs look so good. I know my eyes are blazing, because every time he looks at me he grins knowingly. I had to cross my legs when he began cooking what I figured out will be a frittata. His damn back is to me, and all I can see are his back muscles stretching out his t-shirt and his ass in those slim jeans that are exposing a sliver of his goddamn
Ellen
underwear.
Seriously?
A man who loves the goddess that is Ellen Degeneres is a dream. He looks over his shoulder, catching me in all of my voyeuristic glory, and I try to hold my ground, but a small blush covers my cheeks.

“Like what you see?”

“Maybe. It depends. Is my food ready yet?”

“Matter of fact, it is,” he says, turning off the stove and bringing the cast iron pan over to the counter next to me. The smell emanating from the dish is absolutely mouth-watering.

“
Mmm
, yes, I definitely like what I see.”

A huge grin spreads across my face after his eyes zoom onto my lips, which were just between my teeth before a good licking by my tongue. I hop off the counter and search for two plates and wine glasses, then open the fridge and pull out a bottle of Riesling like I own the place. All the while, Jake is still looking at me with a mixture of desire and amusement.

“Stick your tongue back in your mouth and let’s eat.” I say, hip-checking him as I walk around the counter to the table. He follows me, placing the pan down before sitting himself. He watches me fill our glasses practically to the brim, which probably isn’t the smartest idea, considering the way he’s looking at me. Like he no longer wants frittata for lunch, and would prefer a heaping plate of Evangeline instead.

“Stop looking at me like that.”

“You started it. And I can’t help it. You’re too fucking sexy.”

“Jake, shut up and serve me.”

“Baby, I’ll serve you any way you want.”

I ball up a napkin and throw it at his face. “I meant the food, perv. I’m starving.”

“Me, too.” He agrees huskily, his darkening eyes setting my body ablaze. I squirm in my seat, trying to alleviate the sharp pangs I’m feeling in my pussy.

“
Jake
.”

“I’m going to have a taste, Evangeline. Maybe not today or even tomorrow, but I will soon. I have to.” He says ominously before removing his eyes from mine and slicing our lunch.

The sincerity and weight of his words gives me chills, but I’m not quite sure it’s in a good way. My sopping wet pussy sure thinks so, but my heart—my heart is on the fence. I don’t know what that means exactly, and I’m really not in the mood to dwell on it at the moment. So I do what any self-respecting woman who is pretty much cheating on her partner of forever would do.

I down my wine and pour another glass.

Lunch is amazing. I mean like, so-good-I-could-eat-the-whole-damn-thing-plus-lick-the-plate-and-pan good. The final result is a frittata with shredded chicken, gouda, broccoli, tomatoes, and red onion, along with a baguette to share.
Yum
. This man can cook. He’s seriously wasting his talent as a stay-at-home uncle.

“You think you’ll go back to work anytime soon?” I ask between bites of this deliciousness.

“I don’t know. I needed the break after Sarah died. She was the only family who mattered that I had left. My parents died. And then my grandparents died after Sarah and I moved out. It was just her and I against the world. And then—my heart just wasn’t in it anymore.” His eyes fill with tears that I know will never fall.
Not now at least
. My heart breaks for him, knowing all too well how it feels to be alone. But I guess I was never truly alone. I had Cole. I
always
had Cole. A single tear slips out accidentally. I try to wipe before Jake notices, but I’m too late. He grabs my hand across the table, holding it securely in his.

“Hey, don’t cry. I’m okay now. I’ve got Ben, and he’s like the son I never thought I wanted. And then there’s you.” A small smile graces his lips. “Before we moved here, Ben and I were just coexisting, dragging through the endless days until we met you. You and those crazy, amazing kids of yours. You breathed life back into our world. I’ll never forget that. No matter what.”

That would be when the floodgates open.

Tears begin to cascade down my face.
Jesus, I’m like a fucking waterfall today. Shit. I don’t even want to know what I look like
.

I hear Jake’s chair scrape against the linoleum as I bury my face into my hands, and an instant later I’m being pulled off the chair and cradled into a warm, woodsy smelling chest.

“Shit baby, I didn’t mean to make you cry again. I just wanted you to know how lucky I am that you came into my life. I wasn’t expecting you. You came out of nowhere, and I didn’t even realize I needed you until that day you came barging into my house, babbling about how awesome your cake was. Which it was, in fact, the best cake I’ve ever eaten.”

“I told you. Badass,” I say through tears.

He lets out a laugh into my hair. I raise my head from his chest and look up through bleary eyes, my cheeks stained with my now receding tears and I see this wonderful man who lost so much in his life, yet is still risking his heart for a sliver of mine. “Why couldn’t I have met you ten years ago?”

“It just wasn’t our time, I guess.”

Or maybe it’s just not meant to be.

“Hey, don’t say that.”

Shit, did I say that out loud?
From the crease in his forehead and the hard stare he’s giving me, I’m going to go with yes.

“This is happening, whether you chose to believe it or not. You’re in my arms, for fuck’s sake. And maybe you’re not mine completely, but you will be. I feel it. This is supposed to happen. And it will. Don’t stop what has just begun.”

“Jake.”

“Don’t. Don’t say anything.” He says before lowering his mouth to mine in a sweet yet sensual kiss, his full lips moving deliberately over mine, teasing them open, and displaying what I would be missing if I put an end to this. He’s making his case with his skilled tongue moving against mine in perfect rhythm. He sucks on my bottom lip, and a small moan escapes my mouth, previous conversation long since forgotten. Damn, this man can kiss so well, my aching pussy is wondering what else he can do with that mouth. I grudgingly push that thought down and attempt to alleviate my want by wiggling my body a little.

Jake instantly stops kissing me.

“You’re going to have to stop moving like that baby, or I’m going to end up pushing you down onto this table and sink deep into that sweet cunt of yours,” he whispers against my lips.

Fuck
me
.

I climb off him quickly, only to jump right back on, so now I’m straddling him. This is most definitely a bad idea, but I don’t think I can go back now. Not with the way his eyes are lighting a fire in my belly, dark, so damn hot, and only for me. And forgive me, but this just feels too damn good to stop.

I recapture his mouth harshly and quiver in his arms as I feel his hands travel slowly up my thighs, resting on the edges of my panties. He doesn’t move any further, but begins to grip them tightly as I intuitively begin to rock my hips against the now bulging seam of his jeans. I want to tell him to move his hands, to dip his fingers underneath my panties and plunge them inside my wetness. But I don’t.
I can’t
. And he knows it.

So, this will have to do. I continue to grind against his erection as our mouths devour each other’s. We’re both moaning, and I know for a fact that I will have bruises on my thighs after this. Jake is clinging to them like they’re his only lifeline. The sound of our heavy breathing between the slurping and sucking of our mouths is so erotic and enticing, it’s making my head swim.

“Jake. Fuck. This feels—”

“So good.” He finishes for me as my movements become faster, frenzied. I gasp loudly as he finally moves his hands, barely brushing my soaked center before resting on my hips from inside my dress. His tongue moves down my neck to the curve of my cleavage. He sucks on the flesh that is now practically falling out of my bodice. My nipples are pleading to feel his mouth on them, but I don’t concede. Instead, I just throw my head back and grip his hair, tugging hard, which prompts a loud groan from Jake before he attacks my mouth again. I’m beginning to feel that familiar curl deep in my belly as we continue to move against each other, the friction becoming too much to ignore.