focused so hard on making the fire that I didn"t have to think
about what almost happened in this room the night before. I
couldn"t bear that memory at the moment. After I was done
with the fires, I fed the horses. Mr. Statesman wanted to
examine my barn, and I was glad for his company. I had
admired him while I was growing up. I could understand
why my father was friends with him.
“This barn is in good condition,” he said.
“Mr. Martin owned this land before I got here, and he
took good care of everything he had. All I have to do is
maintain it.”
“Alex Dawson used to talk about farming, didn"t he?”
I smiled at the thought of my childhood friend. “He
has an aunt and uncle who live in Fargo. They knew some
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farmers, and they would share some stories with me and
Alex when I went over to his place to visit.”
Mr. Statesman nodded and walked over to the
horses. “I don"t recognize this one.”
“I bought that one in October,” I told him. “I wanted
to be sure that two horses were here during the day so Ann
could go into town if she wanted. I ride Lightning into town
when I go to work.” I petted my favorite horse affectionately.
“He"s always been a good horse.”
“I remember you used to take him out and race him
with Alex. Your father bragged that you were faster than
Alex on any horse.” He looked at me. “Your father wil come
around. He just needs time.”
I didn"t believe that was going to happen but didn"t
argue with him.
The snow storm had finally died down, but the wind
was stil blowing the snow around. I hadn"t taken much
notice of the snow storm with everything that was going on.
We returned to the house and sat down in the parlor to talk.
“Are you sure you won"t take the dowry? It is yours
since you married my daughter,” he said.
“No, sir. I wouldn"t feel right about it. I don"t mean
any disrespect.”
“I"m not offended, son.” He paused. He lit his pipe.
“I set aside the dowry when Ann turned sixteen. I knew it
wouldn"t be long before young men started to court her. I
have nothing to do with the money, and it will go to waste if
it"s not used. May I put it in the bank in her name?”
“That is fine.”
He shifted in the chair. “One thing we have always
told Ann is the importance of honesty. A person is only as
good as his word. I remember when she was twelve and
she was playing in the parlor. Later that day, I saw that her
mother"s favorite vase was broken. This vase wasn"t
expensive but it was sentimental. It belonged to her great-
great-grandmother. We questioned her about the vase and
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she said that it was still intact when she left the room. We
didn"t believe her, for who else could have broken it? She
had no brothers or sisters. So, we decided that she couldn"t
go anywhere but school for a month. That was the year she
missed Agnes" eleven year birthday dinner.”
“I remember that. Agnes cried all night.” I grinned at
the memory of my sister"s hysterics.
“Yes. I recal hearing that too. Well, the next week,
the servant who had been watching Ann the day the vase
was broken returned from her vacation and reported that the
neighbor"s cat had gotten into the house. That cat ran
through the parlor and knocked the vase off the table.
Apparently, the letter the servant left explaining this fell off
the table so no one found it until we searched for it. It was
under the couch. We felt awful after that event, but we
learned that we could trust Ann. Believe it or not, she even
confessed to sneaking a few cookies before dinner one
time. You would think it"s easy for someone to admit
something good but to admit to a bad behavior... That takes
character.”
“I understand.” He was telling me, in a very nice way,
that Ann didn"t want to kiss Kent, that Kent had indeed
forced the kiss upon her. I sighed. Certainly, he knew when
Ann was telling the truth, right?
“We received this from her.” He reached into the
breast pocket of his suit and pulled a letter out. I took it as
he handed it to me. “She is happy here, and for that, we are
grateful to you. Now, to change the subject, I want to learn
more about tractors. I haven"t seen one close up.”
I put the letter in my pocket, unsure of whether or not
I wanted to read it. “I have a book on the desk over there.
Would you like to see it?”
He nodded, so we spent the rest of the afternoon
looking through the book together.
***
Falling In Love With Her Husband
I did feel better by the time dinner was ready. I still
couldn"t look at Ann but did participate in the conversation,
which was an improvement over my mood earlier that day.
Ann"s father beamed at her. “That was delicious.
Betsy back home doesn"t cook stew this good.”
“Oh, Father. She"s an excellent cook,” Ann argued,
obviously pleased by the compliment.
“Which tel s you how good this stew is.”
He was proud of her, just as I was at times. I wanted
to be proud of her again.
If only Kent didn’t haunt me...
“It is very good, my dear,” her mother added. “You
have done well in learning so much. I don"t know how you
do it all. You must be exhausted by the end of the day.”
“I was at first,” she confessed, “but after I got used to
it, I hardly noticed how much work it was. You should have
seen my first attempt at cooking pancakes. It was a
disaster.”
I chuckled as I recalled the mess in the kitchen. It
took us a good half hour to clean it up. She was endearing
as she frantically scurried around the room to clean it up,
hoping I wouldn"t discover her mishap.
“I don"t mean to be rude but I have some dishes to
wash,” she said.
“Can I help?” her mother asked.
“Yes.”
“We"l get out of your way,” her father replied.
I wanted to stay with her and ask her again about the
events in the mercantile but realized it wasn"t the right time,
so I followed him out of the room.
***
That night, I sat on my bed. I was exhausted but
didn"t want to sleep. I stared at the wall for the longest time
as the events of the past two days played over and over in
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my mind. It didn"t make sense that Ann would want to
consummate our marriage if she planned to leave me. Why
would she risk getting a child with me? She had made it a
point to never spend a moment alone with any men while
she was living with her parents. Even now, I was the only
man she let herself be alone with.
She trusted me. She knew I wouldn"t force myself
on her. But she never allowed Kent to be alone with her. I
sighed. It didn"t make sense that she would be alone in the
backroom of the store with Kent. Then I remembered the
missing bell on the door of the store. That bell always made
the loudest ring. No one could miss it if they were in the
backroom. She would have come out of the backroom if
she heard the bell. Had the bell been there on the door, she
wouldn"t have been in the backroom with him. Then Mrs.
Carson would have been in sight and the kiss most likely
wouldn"t have happened. Could it be true that he forced her
to kiss him? Did he take advantage of the situation?
The
thought was too appealing to my wounded heart.
I stood up and walked to the window. It was a clear
night and the moon was full. It was the perfect night to be
enjoying Ann in her bed.
Any night would be the perfect
night to enjoy her.
I turned from the window and stared at
my room. It wasn"t as warm as her room, but I knew that it
felt lonely because she wasn"t here.
I remembered the letter her father handed to me.
What did I have to lose? I took the letter out of my pocket
and read it. It was written on October 13.
My Dear Mother and Father,
I was glad when I received your letter. In my hasty
departure, there were many things I failed to explain. But
first, I want to say I miss you both. Even so, I don’t regret
coming here. There are many things I have learned. I
actually cook and clean on my own. There is a good woman
who lives on the farm next to ours who has taught me to
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cook. When I started cooking, I made many mistakes. I
couldn’t even make scrambled eggs without cracking almost
a dozen eggs the wrong way or burning them in the pan. I
have gone through five pans already in my pursuit to be a
better cook. The laundry is tedious at times but it gives me
time to think.
I can’t remember what my life was like when I had
servants catering to my every whim, and to be honest, I
would rather do these things myself. It is fulfilling to do hard
work. Every time I see Todd’s eyes light up when he tries a
new recipe that turned out right, all of my previous failures
seem insignificant.
As for Kent, my heart is free of the burden of my
anger and grief. Todd has been patient with me during this
time, which must be hard for him. You were right about him.
He is a good man. I wish I had taken the time to learn that
while we were growing up. I keep wondering why I
continually pushed him away in Virginia. I can only come to
the conclusion that he didn’t stand out as men like Kent did.
Todd was shy and quiet. He stayed mostly to himself,
though Creepy Alex did bring him out of his shell. I hate to
admit it, but Creepy Alex probably wasn’t so creepy after all.
I should stop calling him ‘Creepy’ Alex. It’s a force of habit.
Anyway, it was Alex who realized what a good friend Todd
was when so few others did. Not that Todd didn’t have
other friends, but I don’t think any of them took the time to
see Todd for who he really was the way that Alex did. It was
Alex who encouraged Todd to pursue his dream of farming.
I didn’t even know of this until the night you dragged
me to the dinner at the Brothers’ house. I had wanted to
stay home and mope in self-pity, but you insisted I get out,
which I am very thankful for. That was the night when Todd
and I were on the veranda and he told me he was going to
leave for North Dakota. He also professed his love for me
and told me he understood that I didn’t share those feelings.
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It wasn’t until the Monday before the dance that I
decided to ask Todd to take me with him to North Dakota. I
considered asking him to stay in Virginia so I could take the
time to know him better, but it didn’t seem right to ask him to
stay when it meant he had to work at the bank. So I opted
to ask him to marry me and take me to North Dakota with
him. If Todd left, I would be stuck with settling with
someone who most likely would not love me as well as Todd
did.
You would be surprised at how he resisted my plan
at first. I know he resisted because he didn’t think it was in
my best interest. I had to threaten to run away if he didn’t
take me along. We got married by our preacher and you
know the rest. I have grown closer to Todd than I have ever
been to anyone. He still treats me very well and considers
my needs before his own. I can’t imagine my life without
him and am thankful for his love. I only hope I can be the
kind of wife who will bless him. He makes a wonderful
husband and he will make a wonderful father.
All My Love,
Ann
I set the letter down. She did love me. This time
when I cried, it was with relief. She was still here. She
didn"t leave with Kent. If she really wanted to run off with