For Her Son's Sake (9 page)

He turned away and she let her hand drop to her side as he leaned in close, staring at her with those intense eyes of his. “Myself. I want to believe I still have my edge and you haven’t dulled it.”

“You do,” she said. She knew he’d never let any woman, especially one who’d been born a Chandler, have that much influence over him.

“Really?” he asked, taking her hand in his and bringing it to his chest. He held her hand there and she felt the beat of his heart grow more rapid.

“Feel that?” he asked. “I’m totally pretending you have no effect on me, but it’s not true. I need to keep my perspective. I don’t want to fall prey to some kind of silly emotion.”

“Silly emotion? Like what? This is lust.” She stepped closer and put her other hand on his shoulder. “We want each other and that is the only thing between us right now.”

“Are you sure of that?” he asked. “Last night it felt like more and I know it did to you as well.”

“How do you know that?” she demanded. “Can you read minds now?”

“I don’t have to. I can read your face, Emma, and you were scared last night. Afraid of the implications of what we’d done, the same as I was. Both of us are scrambling to find normal again and if that means I have to micromanage you to feel like things are the way they should be, then that is what I’m going to do.”

“You’re the boss,” she said, rising on tiptoe and biting him on the earlobe. She heard his sucked-in breath and felt his heartbeat race. “But that seems like the dumbest idea in the world. The more time we spend together the more we are going to want to rip each other’s clothes off.”

She picked up her bag and walked out of the boardroom.

Nine

K
ell pulled into the parking lot at the Staples Center wearing his Steven Nash jersey. He was a longtime fan and had been happy when Nash had transferred to L.A. to play out the end of his career.

As Kell walked into the arena, he noticed that he’d received a text. He glanced down at his phone and saw that it was from Dec.

Little hiccup. We couldn’t get a sitter for tonight so I am bringing DJ and Sammy. Allan is bringing Hannah.

What? This wasn’t what he needed tonight. He kept trying to just get his life back to normal and now it was babies and cousins. He should just pretend he had a meeting and head back home. Except he didn’t want to spend the night at home, alone and thinking about Emma, which is exactly what would happen.

He texted back.
Fine.

Sorry. Being a dad is complicated.

I’m being a jerk. Sorry. I ordered our regular food for the box. Do I need anything extra for the babies?

Nah. I’ll bring it. I’ll be there in ten minutes or so.

See ya then.

He entered their box and remembered the good old days when Dec would have brought girls with him instead of babies. God, life had changed a lot this past year. Of course, Kell had indirectly been the catalyst for that change so he shouldn’t complain, but nothing had gone to his plan.

“Hiya,” Allan said as he walked into the corporate box with a flowery diaper bag over one shoulder and baby Hannah in his arms. She wore a pair of purple leggings and what looked like a brand new Lakers T-shirt. She had her fist in her mouth and drool was dripping down her arm.

“Hello,” Kell said. “Need a hand?”

“Yes. Miss Squirmy has been trying to get down since we entered the arena. You should have seen her in the store when we were buying her T-shirt. Luckily one of the sales girls helped me out,” Allan said, handing Hannah to Kell.

Not exactly what he’d had in mind but he looked down at the little girl and she pulled her fist from her mouth and smiled at him. He smiled back and tried to hold on to the wriggling nine-month-old. But it was clear she wanted to be on her own to explore the room.

“Okay to let her loose?” he asked Allan.

“I think so.”

He walked over to the bar, where the catering staff had laid out food and drinks and grabbed a napkin to dry Hannah’s hand before he set her down. When he did, she took off like a rocket, crawling around the room. Kell had a chuckle, as he watched Allan following her.

His cousin was a changed man.

“I guess Dec got in touch with you,” Allan said.

“Yes. It’s not what I had planned but then life is different now, isn’t it?”

“It sure is. I had no idea one little person could command so much of my time and energy. Jessi had mentioned bringing the baby with her but she said the girls needed some time to relax and talk. They are worried about Emma.”

“What about?” Kell asked. He really didn’t want their families to know that they had slept together. He got that women liked to talk about things but he wasn’t looking forward to having a chat on the subject with his cousins. He’d given them both hell when they’d hooked up with other Chandler sisters.

The door opened and Dec walked in holding Sammy’s hand and wearing a baby carrier on his chest with his eighteen-month-old son DJ in it. DJ was swinging his legs and had on a pair of sunglasses.

“I need a cold one,” Dec said.

Kell shook his head as Sammy let go of Dec’s hand and walked into the room. The toddler was dressed in a pair of jeans, Converse tennis shoes and a racecar T-shirt. He waved at Kell and walked over to him while Dec got DJ out of the carrier.

“Darth!”

“Dude, I wish you’d call me Kell.”

“I like Darth,” Sammy said.

Of course he did. “You like basketball?”

“I don’t know,” Sammy said.

Kell glanced around at his cousins with their babies and realized whether he wanted it or not, he and Sammy were going to be paired up tonight. Kell tried to show Sammy the court but the little guy couldn’t see over the railing.

“Want me to pick you up?”

Sammy nodded and lifted his arms up toward him. Kell lifted him somewhat awkwardly, but Sammy knew how to be held and Kell caught on quickly. He pointed out the nets and talked a little about the game but then realized he was probably talking over the three-year-old’s head.

“Hungry?”

Sammy nodded, and Kell carried him over to the bar and helped him make a plate of nachos with nothing spicy on it and then got him settled in a chair where he could see the game just in time for tip-off.

Sammy got into the game, standing and cheering whenever Kell, Allan and Dec did. Hannah fell asleep in Allan’s arms by halftime and he left so that it was just Dec and DJ keeping Kell and Sammy company.

DJ and Sammy played on the floor with toy racecars that Dec had brought in DJ’s bag. Kell and his cousin sat back, drinking Coke and enjoying the game as the boys played. The situation was so foreign to his life that Kell felt as if he was watching someone else. Even as a child he didn’t have a lot of memories like this. Sometimes Dec, Allan and he would get together and hang out, but since there had been so much animosity in the family they had all been pretty much on their own.

“So, you’re doing good with Sammy,” Dec said in a leading way during a time-out in the game. It wasn’t like his cousin to beat around the bush.

“Yeah. I had dinner with Emma last night. And I’ve been talking to Sam to get an idea about how he’d use the game she wants to develop.”

“This seems like more than just market research,” Dec said.

“Well, it’s not,” Kell said. He wasn’t ready to be a stepfather to Emma’s son. He wasn’t even sure he was going to sleep with her again. He didn’t want Dec speculating about him.

Dec just raised his eyebrows. “Whatever you say.”

“I’m being an ass again, aren’t I?”

“Yeah, but I know it’s just because I cut a little too close to the truth.”

“You did. Remember how I acted when you told us about Cari?” Kell asked.

“I try not to because you were a total jerk but yeah, I remember,” Dec said.

“I’m that way toward myself,” Kell said after a few minutes had passed. He was torn between being fascinated and experiencing something new that he’d never felt before and knowing that Emma was a Chandler and therefore off-limits. He was even conflicted over Sammy—by the fact that Gregory Chandler, the big, bad wolf from Kell’s childhood, was the toddler’s great-grandfather.

Dec reached over, clapping him on the shoulder. “It sounds like you might be falling for her.”

“I’m not. It’s just some sort of attraction based on proximity,” Kell said.

“Never say that in front of a woman unless you want her to rip you a new one,” Dec said.

“I wouldn’t. I’m not talking to a woman unless all the baby care has turned you into one,” Kell said. “Listen, I know it sounds ridiculous, but it really is the only explanation I’ve got right now. It makes sense to me that after you and Allan paired up with her sisters that we’d start to feel attracted to one another.”

Dec nodded. “So what you’re saying is that if we weren’t involved with her sisters you wouldn’t even notice Emma?”

He nodded at his cousin, and then luckily the game resumed before Kell was forced to admit he’d become a big liar. Even before his cousins had met Jessi and Cari, Kell had been attracted to Emma.

DJ and Sammy came back over to them and Dec scooped his son up, holding him on his lap as the game got underway. Sammy stood there looking around and then walked over to Kell and just stared at him.

Kell saw himself in that little toddler. Remembered what it felt like to be the only kid at school without a dad on those days when parents were invited to the classroom. He didn’t care what happened with Emma; he knew he had to be careful not to harm Sam. Not just for the boy’s sake but also for his own.

He reached down and scooped the three-year-old up. Sammy didn’t say anything; he just settled down on Kell’s lap and put his arm around him, resting his head against Kell’s chest.

Kell sat there as emotions—real emotions he couldn’t deny—stirred in him. He wanted to be the kind of man who would be a good father to Sammy. He knew that Emma deserved a man who would do that for her.

But for a brief instant he wished that he could be that man. He knew that it was a stretch and never in his life had family or forever been a part of the picture, but tonight he sort of wished it was.

* * *

Emma had had a moment’s panic when she realized that Dec and Allan were going to be watching all the babies and hanging out with Kell. Mrs. Hawking’s granddaughter had the lead role in a play at her school so Mrs. Hawking needed the night off. It wasn’t his normal situation and she didn’t know if he’d be able to handle it. But then she reminded herself that she wasn’t responsible for him or his happiness. She trusted her soon-to-be brothers-in-law with her son.

The Chandler sisters had decided to go to a nightclub on the beach near their homes. It had been a long time since they’d all been to a club together. At least since before the merger, if not before Emma had met Helio. Her life had been going on fast-forward for the last five years. She felt as if she’d lost herself somewhere in that race.

And she no longer knew who she was. She had taken to defining herself as a mom. Being Sammy’s mom took a lot of her time and it was easy to see herself only in that role. But the other night with Kell she’d been reminded that she was still a young woman with needs, desires and dreams for her future that hadn’t died with Helio or the loss of Infinity Games. Those two things were tied together in her head and always would be. Infinity Games had saved her sanity when she’d been widowed. She’d needed it, and maybe that was why she was spinning her wheels now about Kell.

She knew that she didn’t need the company the way she used to, but until the board had delivered that ultimatum to her she had been ignoring the fact that her future was her own again. She hadn’t meant to lose Infinity Games, but having done so she realized it freed her up.

She sighed without meaning to as a sense of relief surged through her when they all took a seat at the cocktail table.

“You okay?” Cari asked.

“Yes,” Emma said, and for the first time in a long time she realized she truly was okay. She knew that whatever happened with Kell she was going to embrace it. And see where it led. She was tired of sitting in the backseat and watching life pass her by.

“Good. You seemed a little off today,” Cari said.

“It was a tiny bit stressful to be presenting an idea to the board and knowing the stakes were high if I screwed it up. I always feel like Grandfather is watching me, ready to pounce if I haven’t thought of every detail.”

It was true. The fact that she’d been remembering how Kell looked naked standing in her bedroom had also been distracting, but she didn’t want to mention that to her sisters.

“Gramps was some piece of work. No wonder Dad was such a tyrant,” Jessi said as she came back to their table in the corner with a round of pomegranate martinis.

“He was. I get why Mr. Montrose would hate us. You’d think Grandfather would have been happier having won the initial battle between them, but he didn’t seem to ever be.”

Cari took a sip of her drink and then shrugged. “I always thought he must have been embarrassed when he cut the Montroses out of the company. I mean, it had to be something that didn’t sit right in his soul, you know?”

Emma wanted to smile at the sweet and caring spin that Cari put on their grandfather’s ruthlessness. Her sister saw the world through her own rose-colored glasses and because she would never be able to do something like their grandfather had and live with it, she’d painted him in the same colors. But a part of Emma believed her grandfather was simply one of those people who were never happy. Who didn’t like other people and therefore didn’t feel guilty about the Montrose affair, but simply saw it as more collateral damage.

“Maybe. It doesn’t matter. He’s dead and the Montrose heirs have gotten their revenge.... They’ve sort of evened out the scales and now we’re all in a better place,” Jessi said. “Or we will be once we get Emma sorted out. I really didn’t think I’d want to work for the merged company at first, but it just feels right now.”

“It feels right because you’re in love with a Montrose and you were instrumental in getting the merged company a big money contract with a Hollywood producer. I think we need to toast that again,” Emma said. “To Jessi.”

Cari and Jessi both lifted their glasses, clinking them against Emma’s, and then all three sisters took a sip of their drinks. They ordered snacks and as the evening went on Emma tried to make peace with the jealousy she felt toward her sisters and their neat and tidy lives. She knew they’d both suffered a lot to get to the happy place they were in now.

“What’s the matter, Emma?” Cari asked as she noticed her expression.

“Nothing,” Emma said. No way was she going to cry on her sisters’ shoulders and tell them that she wanted what they had. Or that she might want it with Kell. She knew enough about human psychology to realize that ever since she’d had sex with Kell, her hormones were trying to tell her he’d make the perfect mate.

“Liar,” Jessi said. “Does this have anything to do with Kell?”

Emma shook her head. It had everything to do with Kell.

“What about Kell?” Cari asked.

“They had dinner together last night,” Jessi said. “I suspect more than dinner.”

“Ugh. Leave it be, please,” Emma said.

“Did you when we asked you to leave us alone over Allan and Dec?” Jessi asked. “No, you had to go all big sister and try to give us advice and help us out.”

Cari reached over and patted Emma’s hand. “I hated that interference but knowing you had my back made everything easier. Tell us what’s going on.”

“Nothing at all, except that I might be losing it,” Emma said.

“How?”

“I’m attracted to Kell.”

“He’s not bad looking,” Jessi said.

“Jess!”

“What? He’s like I imagine Lucifer looks. With those dreamy silver eyes and those curls. Who has curls anymore? He should look ridiculous but he doesn’t,” Jessi said.