Authors: Mark Tufo
“I’ll watch them, Mike, and I swear nothing will happen to them, but I really do want
to blow some shit up.” He walked away.
“I didn’t think he’d go so quietly,” Tommy confided in me.
“Oh, I’m sure at some point this will come back around. I’ll have to deal with it
at that point, I suppose. Let’s get out of here before Tracy figures out I’m gone.
Tommy didn’t even say a word, he knew better.
I felt like a damned ninja when I jumped up onto the fence. I’d almost cleared it
not realizing my newfound strength. I think I sub-consciously tried to force down
what part of me was. I very rarely used my new skills and just tried to march on as
if all was as it was supposed to be. I truly hoped that the boys had not witnessed
this feat. I launched myself up and over the rest of the way, landing softly on the
other side. I paused for a moment, waiting for my body to react to the forces of gravity;
for the bottoms of my feet, my ankles, knees, hips and back to scream their protests
at jumping that distance and the more pain-inducing landing.
I gingerly took a step, when I realized I was going to be spared all those pops, groans
and potential breaks. For that, at least, I was happy.
“What about the bikes?” Tommy asked.
“I just said that to throw BT off.”
There was that constant underlying funk of the dead as we roamed the streets. None
were around us but the smell hung like a low covering of ground fog.
“You know where we’re going?” I asked Tommy softly.
“You do know we can communicate without speech right?” he asked.
“Yeah, I know, it just weirds me out.”
“Weirder than getting eaten?”
‘Fine, have it your way,’ I said through our silent communication.
‘Another mile or so.’
‘How do you know?’
‘The smell is most of it, and if you stopped closing your mind off to it, there’s
still a connection there.’
‘You’re giving me crap because I don’t want to talk with zombies?’
‘Good point.’
We turned a corner and realized too late we weren’t alone.
‘Miss that one?’ I asked Tommy sarcastically.
“No guns.” He pushed my muzzle down.
“Dammit.” I grabbed the machete from its sheath behind my back.
“Hear that?” Tommy asked, putting a hand up to his head.
On some level I did, there was this low grating buzz that I just figured was a brain
aneurysm. I told Tommy I didn’t hear anything.
“He’s communicating.”
“With us?” I asked, genuinely concerned. The last thing I wanted was a heart-to-heart
with Larry the Lurcher.
“Other zombies,” Tommy said in a tone that left no room for doubt that he thought
I was nuts to think such a thing.
The zombie was actually wavering between running at us and waiting for his buddies
to come. For a moment it looked like he was going to flee as I came at him with the
large blade. Now that would have been something to see. A zombie running from me,
I would have paid good money for that. Instead, I was witness to the slicing open
of his head. Blood blew out in a halo. That incessantly irritating sound he was making
stopped before he hit the ground.
“Did it work?” I asked Tommy, wiping my blade off on the zombie’s shirt. At this point
I wasn’t sure if I was making the blade dirtier or cleaner, all sorts of disgusting
things were ingrained on the material. Shit, I think I even saw mushrooms growing
(and they weren’t of the psilocybin variety either).
“Yeah, cutting his skull worked just fine,” Tommy answered, not understanding my question.
“I meant the SOS; did he get it out in time?” Now there was very little chance I was
going to be able to get away with this without Tracy finding out. I was covered in
all manner of disgusting little tidbits.
“I think the range is pretty limited, but I’m no zombie expert. Still, I think it’d
be for the best if we left this general area.”
“You sound a lot like my other son…Captain.”
The observation may have been obvious, but that didn’t mean we shouldn’t heed it.
We moved over to the next side street, hoping that if any zombies were coming, they
would be on a different approach.
We stayed in silence the rest of the way. I could sense Tommy’s agitation as we got
nearer to the town’s gas station.
“Getting close,” he hissed, not even heeding his own earlier advice.
“What’s with the gas stations?” I asked. “Seems like they wouldn’t want to be around
something so volatile.”
“The smell, the gas masks them.”
“I don’t know about that.” My own eyes were watering. “That sure does make them a
lot smarter than I would like to give them credit for. Let’s get this done,” I said
to Tommy.
I almost popped my knees out of their sockets when I attempted to thrust up from our
hidden vantage point and didn’t move. Tommy had a firm grasp on my shoulder harness
and I couldn’t budge.
“Guards.” He pointed to a small group of zombies milling about over towards our far
left.
“Guards?” I asked. It just looked like a gaggle of the slimy fucks. “They just look
like they’re hanging out.” And then I answered my own question. They were hanging
out watching over their brood. “You have got to be shitting me. How can we possibly
kill that many without one of them sending off a message?” There were eight of them
that we could see from our vantage point and I had to believe they had more behind
the station. “Will they go for bait and not call for others?” I asked.
“Mr. T, I have a tenuous link, I’m not the zombie whisperer.”
I looked over to him. “That’s funny, you know. I just thought you should know that.
Alright, let’s give this a shot. I’m going to move over to their side and when they
notice me I’m going to run towards here and hopefully we can kill them all.”
“Hopefully?”
“Hey, don’t give me shit. At least I made a plan this time.”
“Not really much of one,” I heard him mutter. I backed up so I could move around quietly.
Zombies were predators plain and simple. Why would they call for help if a meal was
on the line? I mean, why share all this delicious meat with forty or fifty of their
closest friends when eight should be sufficient to get the job done? At least that
was my hope. If we got the whole den in on the action, we were going to have to leave
in a hurry.
I was perpendicular to the front of the station. I had been so intent on being quiet
that they had not noticed me yet. When I got within thirty or so yards, I started
whistling
All My Love
by Led Zeppelin. I have no idea why that song sprang into my head, but it sure as
hell got their attention.
All nine heads swiveled in my direction. Nine? I looked quickly in the direction I
needed to go; it was about a football field away—maybe a Canadian Football field.
I licked my lips, hoping that my flight would trigger their instinctual need to pursue.
No worries on that front, they were already coming.
“I did this voluntarily?” I asked as I started to run.
If I didn’t have some of Tommy’s blood in me, I wouldn’t have made it, plain and simple.
The zombies weren’t running to a spot where I was, like they had been, but rather
where I was going. They were on an intercept course and they had a better angle. Getting
a touchdown was going to be difficult.
“Coming in hot!” I shouted to Tommy when I was within a few feet.
“Like I can’t see you.”
Tommy stuck out his hands, absorbing my speed and helping me to slow so I could turn
and help him fight the enemy. Nine, even for Tommy would be pushing it. The zombies
fanned out once they saw that I had stopped and was standing my ground with another.
Their hasty approach became one of slow and steady caution as they began to stalk
us.
“This is unreal,” I said referring to their being able to adapt to the situation and
act accordingly. I honestly didn’t think the use of basic weapons was too far out
of their grasp, so to speak. “I’m thinking we should attack before we’re completely
surrounded.”
Tommy barely waited for the reverberations of the words to stop before he moved to
his side, his blade whistling through the wind. I was mid-swing when I heard a head
strike the underbrush. We moved in a fluid dance of death, spinning clockwise to our
center. The black steel of the blades quickly becoming covered in all manner of what
was once human detritus. I’d killed three on my trip around the merry-go-round while
Tommy doled out the ultimate punishment to five. The ferocity with which he dispatched
his impartial judgment was awe-inspiring and quite frightening at the same time. He
had more of his sister in him than either of us would have liked to admit.
I did the math quickly in my head, three plus five is eight, we were light a zombie.
Then I noticed one was hauling ass back towards the building.
“This sucks. I like stupid zombies just fine,” I said as I hurtled over two dead ones.
I caught him just as I felt that niggling feeling in my skull. The tip of my blade
sliced straight down his neck and back, parting the skin and giving me a perfect view
of his spine. I watched the compression of his disks as he kept running before blood
began to well up in the one inch wide opening. He quickly side-stepped, my next slice
catching him low in the neck, more towards the collar bone. The blade was lodged deep
into bone, so much so that I completely stopped his forward momentum. We both nearly
went down with my wrist attached to the machete by a heavy hemp cord.
The blade popped loose as he struck the ground. He was staring straight up at me as
I brought the heel of my boot down on the middle of his face. I turned my face as
gore shot up and around my contact point. The next time, I stomped my whole foot down.
I’d done it so hard that it sent shock waves throughout my entire body. I twisted
my leg like I was putting a cigarette out, or maybe doing the funky chicken dance,
you decide which analogy fits better.
I was breathing heavy; not so much from the exertion, but from the fight itself. I
was disgusted by what I had just done; yet, in one sense, exhilarated. I’d defeated
my enemy on the field of battle. It was them or me, and it
always
had to be them. This wasn’t dominoes; there was no margin for error. As Tommy walked
up, we both watched the zombie’s legs twitching like the death throes of a cockroach.
Now
that
was fucking disgusting.