Four Summers (2 page)

Alec is a year-rounder like us, though he doesn’t live at The Village, which is the name of our “dream getaway”. He lives up the street. Our parents are best friends, too.

He doesn’t realize how lucky he is not to
have
to work here, but I don’t say that. “Thanks.”

We do a quick sweep of the place. I freshen the potpourri, make sure the rooms are spider-web free, and all sorts of stupid things. Just as we’re walking out and I’m locking up, car doors slam behind me.

Great. I had hoped to make it out and put the keys back before they got here so Mom or Sadie Ann would have to be the ones to talk to them. They’re much better with people than I am.

As soon as I turn around, everything changes. My heart speeds up. I feel hotter, almost like I can’t breathe. I swear I’m not one of those annoying girls who pine for their stupid dream boy at fifteen-years-old. I’ve never even had a boyfriend. Or wanted a boyfriend. I’ve looked at tons of boys though: Alec, boys at my school who used to call me “flatty-Rae” instead of Charlie Rae because God obviously decided he could only give boobs to one Gates sister and chose Sadie Ann.

I’ve seen how boys look at my sister, but when I’ve looked at them, I’ve never felt…well almost like I have the flu, to be honest, but I’ve never looked at a boy and felt
this
.

I can’t see his eye color from this far. His hair is bark-brown, with streaks of gold when the sun hits it. One look at him says he’s so different than me. I shouldn’t be staring, but my eyes won’t move away.

I believe everyone has certain key moments in their lives they’ll never forget. Moments marking the beginning or end of something. Moments that will always own a little piece of you. You can track decisions you make or paths your life follows and they always lead back to one of these defining moments.

This is one of them.

I’m not stupid enough to think I understand it. I don’t believe in love at first sight or anything like that. I don’t even know this boy, much less feel anything, but he…
This
is one of my moments. I know it like my body knows it has to breathe to survive.

Mom, Dad, Sadie Ann, or probably anyone else would think I’m crazy, and maybe I am crazy because I’m sitting here thinking tons of thoughts that have no business in my head. Thoughts I’d laugh at if anyone else had them. I know who boys like him are. They’re stuck up, rude, think they’re better than us, and everyone here knows they always, always leave, but still…this summer boy just gave me my first
moment
. A piece of my life I will never forget.

“Hello? Earth to Charlie.” Alec grabs my shoulder. Immediately I feel the blush crawl over my whole body.

“Um… Sorry. I’m not feeling too well.”

The family is walking toward us. The dad is in crisp, new jeans, but with a button up shirt that looks like it goes with a suit. The mom is wearing a bright red summer dress, heels and a big red hat. The other boy looks exactly like my summer boy, but somehow…different. His hair is a little darker. He’s maybe an inch taller. They’re dressed like only summer boys are in expensive tennis shoes and ironed shorts. But still, I can’t stop looking. There’s an ease about him I don’t usually see in summer boys. A laid back expression that doesn’t completely fit what I’m used to.

“Hello! We stopped by the office, finished filling out the paperwork, and they said you’d have the keys?” The dad walks up to us, a perfect smile on his perfect face.

“Umm…yeah. Here. They’re right here.” I try to hand them to him, but they slip through my fingers and fall to the ground. My moment boy has reached us, and he bends to pick them up at the same time Alec and I do. All three hands zoom toward one destination. Mine touches his. It’s not one of those “electric” sensations books and movies always talk about. Maybe I wish it is or maybe I just feel silly touching him, but I jerk my hand back. In my rush not to look like I’m trying to hold hands with him, I lose my balance a little. The more I try to catch myself, the more I stumble until I’m on my butt. On the porch. And I’m dying.

“Charlie? Are you okay?” Alec abandons his quest for the keys and reaches for me instead.

“Charlie?” moment boy asks. Yes, I want to tell him. Yes, I have a stupid boy’s name! And no boobs, and I just fell in front of you! But of course, I don’t.

“I’m fine. I think I’m getting sick, or something. I need to go home and lie down.” And die!

“Okay…okay. I’ll help you.” Alec pulls me to my feet, putting his arm around me. Then to the summer family, he says, “Sorry about this. Everything you guys need should be in there. If not, call the office. I better get her home.”

“Definitely. I’m so sorry you’re not feeling well, dear,” the mom says.

“Thanks.” I can’t even look at her, so I talk to my feet instead. I let Alec lead me back home where I fake being sick again, lock myself in my bedroom and die of embarrassment.

“Charlie?” Alec’s voice sounds through my door before he knocks. I try to ignore it. Want to, but I know Alec. He’ll come right in. Hell, my parents have let him sleep over before. They don’t care if Alec has free reign in my house or my bedroom, which actually makes me feel like crap. Sadie Ann could never have a boy stay over. But me? I’m just Charlie. It’s not like any of the boys are going to want me anyway.

“Come in.” I sit up in my twin bed and lean against the wall. As soon as I do I remember my reaction to the summer boy and how big of an idiot I must have looked like. No wonder they probably wouldn’t care if Alec moved into my bedroom. It’s not like I’m real smooth with guys.

“Are you feeling better? Your dad asked me to come and check on you.”

Ah, so there must be outside work that needs to be done. Charlie work. Not work for Mom or Sadie Ann. “The only time you come looking for me anymore is when my dad sends you. Are you sure you don’t want to just be his best friend instead of mine? You love The Village as much as he does.” I cross my arms and turn away from him. I’m acting like a brat, but I don’t care.

“Shut up. Stop acting like such a girl.” He playfully pushes my arm before sitting next to me.

“I am a girl, you jerk.”

He laughs, but when I don’t join him, he quiets. Alec’s good at stuff like that. I get annoyed with him, but I know he cares about me. “Hey.” He scoots closer. “Believe me, I know you’re a girl, Charlie.”

I turn my head, feet on the bed, knees pulled up to my chest. My head rests on my arms that lie on my knees. “Yeah?”

“Of course. Your arms are puny.” He squeezes my bicep. “And your voice is high pitched. Oh, and you pout a lot—ouch!” He winces when I make a fist and hit him with all the strength in my “puny” arm.

“You’re a jerk!” I try to push off my bed, but Alec grabs my arm and pulls me back down.

“I’m kidding. You know that. What’s wrong?”

Everything and nothing at the same time. I feel both stuck and at home and comfortable and uncomfortable and I suddenly want to be free even though I don’t know what that means. “I told you, I don’t feel well.” I let him keep his arm around me and then rest my head on his shoulder.

“You’re a shitty liar.”

“I thought you would be too big a gentleman to call me on it.”

Alec sighs. “You know you can talk to me, right? What’s wrong? Is it Sadie Ann? Your mom?”

Alec’s the only person in the whole wide world who knows how I feel about my mom and my sister. Mom will never love me like she does Sadie and I know I’ll never be as good, or as pretty as my sister. Well, I’m sure people know that, but I don’t know if they know that I know all those things. Alec does, and even though he drives me just as crazy as they do sometimes, and he would be happy on this land every day like Dad, and wants me to be right here with him, I couldn’t imagine my life without him.

“I don’t know what it is, Alec. I just feel…lost. Like I want more.”

“More of what?” he asks and I know he doesn’t get it. I don’t even get it, so I answer the only way I know how.

“More life.”

I don’t see the family from 3B for the rest of the day. I spend it out in the sun, working with Dad and Alec on boats. One of them is having some trouble and Dad considers himself a boat mechanic even though half of the time he makes things worse than he does better. We waste hours on something that we’ll have to call a mechanic about later, who will have to fix the original problem, plus whatever Dad messed up.

I get it. I know money is tight, and Dad has to hold onto every penny he can. I’m not dumb, but when it ends up costing more than it originally would have? That doesn’t seem like good money management to me.

We’re up early the next day. There’s a lot to do to get ready for The Village Bash. It’s the big night in the beginning of the summer. It’s basically the kick off to the summer season where the people in town come out and all the out-of-towners staying at The Village come and we pretend to know how to party and have a good time. We pretend we’re this fun place where everyone wants to hang out. I guess people seem to enjoy themselves. I used to. I’m not sure why that changed last year, or why this year I’m really not looking forward to it.

“What time is the band supposed to be here?” Dad asks. There’s a huge open area in front of the lake, not far from our store. The trees crowd in behind the area and behind our house where the bash takes place. The party area goes partway down the little strip of “beach” that leads around the lake. People don’t travel too far from the main area for the bash. This is where everything “happens.”

“Same as every year, Dad. Bash starts at four, they’ll be here at two to start setting up.”

“Shit.” He runs a hand through his slightly graying hair. He’s not old. I’m not sure why he’s going gray suddenly. “We need to set up the stage.”

I wait for it. Know it will come so I stand up, and as soon as I’m on my feet he says, “Charlie Rae? You think you and Alec could set up the stage?” It’s not hard. I mean, we can handle it. It’s not a big deal to just have Alec and I do it. Or…

“What about Mom and Sadie? I thought you wanted me to fix the fire pits?”

He shakes his head. “You know your mom or Sadie Ann can’t do the stage. I’ll finish the fire pits. Come on, Charlie. You’re the only one I can count on.”

He means Mom and Sadie won’t, not can’t. I’m pretty sure they’re not helpless. They probably wouldn’t even break a nail. But when he says that, reminding me how much he needs me and gives me that kind smile, it’s hard to stay mad at him. “Let me go grab Alec.”

Dad pulls me to him and kisses my forehead. “Thanks, kid. I love you.”

“Love you too, Dad.” Then I’m off to find Alec to put up a stage and then end up finishing the pits and to do whatever else to have a huge bash that I want no part of. One I wish I could disappear from all together.

The Bash is in full swing. I manage to hide out through the first couple hours, making excuses for reasons to go in the house or to the store. There’s live music, dancing, games, and food. People are laughing and talking and singing. Even Mom and Sadie Ann like The Bash. It’s their day to dress up and give people a reason to envy them. It’s the only time they seem to like having The Village.

I see Sadie dancing on the small dance floor in the sand and watch people circle it, clapping for her. Her dress twirls around her hips and long legs, and I look down at my cut-off shorts and take a minute to thank God that I realize comfort is more important than showing off the assets I don’t have.