Geronimo (A Songbird Novel) (18 page)

“If you don’t get moving, you’ll miss your flight.” He held out my computer bag.

Taking Brandy’s booklet, I slipped it in the side pocket and hitched the strap over my shoulder. “Are you honestly letting me leave five minutes before first bell?”

“Like I said, your friend was very compelling.” He winked and walked to the door, opening it wide and encouraging me through.

I blinked a couple of times then shook my head before murmuring, “Bombs away” and heading out to meet my mother.

Chapter Thirty-Four

Harry

My father fidgeted with his keys while he stood beside me at the airport. I’d already checked in my bag and was anxiously waiting for my flight time. I’d say goodbye to my old man and head through security then hopefully on to something wonderful.

Doubts scoured my insides, leaving me raw and tender. Gripping my Starbucks venti cup, I took another sip only to find it empty. I walked away from my twitching father and threw the cup into the recycling bin. I should never have asked him to drive me up. When I’d told the family my intentions, my sister had swooned and hugged me. Mum and Nan were on board, but Dad didn’t say anything. Unfortunately, he’d been the only family member available to drive me to Heathrow. Our trip had been a quiet one.

Walking back to his side, I hitched my computer bag on my shoulder and considered saying a quick goodbye, but something held me back. Maybe it was the fact I was trying to live a regret-free life, I’m not sure. But instead of doing our standard no-nonsense goodbye, I decided to make my dad spit out whatever he was holding in.

Pointing at the security checkpoint, I glanced at Dad and said, “I’m walking through that gate in ten minutes, so whatever it is you’re thinking right now, you better hurry up and say it.”

He slipped his keys into his pocket and sighed.
“You sure about this, son? You haven’t even called to tell her you’re coming.”

“If I do that, she’ll tell me not to. I need an element of surprise if this is going to work.”

With a dubious smile, he scratched his whiskers and nodded.

“I know you think I’m reckless and impulsive, but you can’t think I’m all bad if you’re lending me the money to pull this off, right?”

His head kept bobbing. “Your mother would have my hide if I hadn’t.”

I grinned. “She’s a good woman.”

Dad’s lips bunched, his round cheeks puffing out like he was fighting the words inside him.

“What, Dad? Just say it.”

“Marriage can be tough. I thought it’d be this fun adventure, see, and then it turned into a hard slog and I just couldn’t do it anymore.”

“Was leaving Mum the biggest regret of your life?”

After a pause, he gave me a slow nod then shrugged. “I had to do it. I had to walk away in order to realize how much I loved her.”

“You took a bloody long time to figure it out,” I muttered, unable to keep the bitterness from my tone.

“I know I did wrong by you kids. I hurt you.”

I scoffed and shook my head. “You know, you’re the reason I didn’t want to marry Tammy. I didn’t want to promise her something and then not deliver. Even though I was sure I could love her for the rest of my life, I was still too scared to go through with it—” I poked Dad lightly in the shoulder. “—because of you.”

Dad’s expression flooded with regret, his eyes begging for forgiveness as he blinked at me.

“But I’m not letting you hold me back anymore. I love Jane. I want to be with her. I
want
to be her husband.”

Dad took a minute to speak. I decided to wait it out. This was the first deep and meaningful we’d really had, and I couldn’t be a heartless bastard and simply walk away from it.

Finally he found the ability to choke out, “I never should have left the family. It was selfish and although I figured out who I really was, I ended up destroying something beautiful in order to do it. I was always glad you never married Tammy. I was worried you’d make the same mistakes I did.”

“I lost her because I was worried I’d make the same mistakes you did.”

His apologetic smile was weak and fleeting.

“I’m not going to lose Jane. I know who I am. I know what I want. This may seem impulsive, but if Tammy’s death has taught me anything, it’s that you can’t count on getting a tomorrow, so I have to make the most of today. I love Jane. She’s meant to be mine. Look at all the circumstances surrounding it. You can’t deny that fate has brought us together. I have to convince her that’s true.”

“You might get fifty years of tomorrows, Harry. Life isn’t always a trip through Europe and romantic dinners by the beach. Sometimes it’s bills and housework…the boring stuff. Do you think you can love her through that too?”

“Being with her, no matter what we’re doing, makes me happy. It’s as easy as breathing.”

The wrinkles around Dad’s eyes deepened when he smiled at me. “I know that feeling. I wish I’d realized how precious it was when I had it. I wish I’d figured out that love—slow and comfortable is the best kind there is. If you think you can love Jane for a lifetime, then I’ll support you.”

My lips tipped into a sad smile. “We can’t guarantee life, Dad. But I can tell you that I will love Jane every day I’m given, and I’ll love her with everything I have.”

Dad lost his voice as he stared at me, his eyes shining with pride. Lurching forward, he wrapped me in his arms and patted my back. “You tell her just that, son.”

“I will, Dad.”

We pounded each other a couple more times on the shoulders then pulled apart. After one more meaningful smile, I stepped away from him and turned for the security checkpoint.

It was time to go and win back my girl.

All I could hope was that she’d be willing to listen.

Chapter Thirty-Five

Jane

I tried to relax on the plane, I really did. But I could barely eat a mouthful of food, and I figured turning up completely drunk to see Sarah wouldn’t fly. So I just stared out my window, worrying that I was making a huge mistake.

Did I really want an excuse to think some more?

Sarah loved surprises, and the idea of whisking me off for a girly weekend no doubt thrilled her. But I wasn’t in the frame of mind to hang out, shoot the breeze…chat about Harry and what I was supposed to do.

It wouldn’t be possible to lie on some exotic beach and relax, not when my heart and mind were in torment. Running my hand over the cover of Brandy’s book, I gazed at the sweet purple dragon and couldn’t help a soft smile.

Harry awakened that in her.

Just like he’d awakened life in me.

I missed him.

The closer I got to Antigua, the more I realized that I wanted to be on that island with
him
, experiencing all it had to offer. Sarah too, of course—I mean, she was my bestie—but Harry just brought everything to life.

So what the hell was I so afraid of?

Thumping my head back with a sigh, I closed my eyes and willed my brain to stop working.

Thinking hurt.

Living hurt.

*****

The sun was piping hot on my skin as I walked down the steps and onto the tarmac at the small airport. I was going to burn like a French fry if I wasn’t careful. Tugging my long-sleeve shirt out of the top of my bag, I stopped and pulled it on, covering my pale skin until I could slather on the sunscreen.

Pushing up my shades, I squinted to the building ahead and noticed Sarah running out the doors to greet me. She jumped up and down, waving wildly and grinning like a cheerleader.

I had to laugh.

She was right to be this happy.

We hadn’t done anything so girly and BFF-ish since before her wedding. It was time to remedy that.

Running forward, I wrapped my arms around her and spoke into her ear. “You are crazy. Dragging me away from home with this big surprise. What are you up to?”

She pulled out of my embrace. “Nothing! I just felt like you had to get away, and I couldn’t resist my awesome rabbit hole metaphor. Come on, surprises are fun!”

I made a face and she laughed at me, threading her arm around mine. “One of my clients has a wedding here this weekend, and I just thought it’d be the perfect chance for you to get away. Your mom agreed with me and paid for your ticket. I got you the room for free.” She winked.

“This is unbelievable,” I murmured.

She squeezed my arm and rested her cheek on my shoulder. “You need this, Jane. You need to get out of your own space so you can think clearly. No work distractions, no sad little apartment to wallow in.” Spreading her arm wide, she sniffed the air then sighed. “Beautiful fresh air, stunning blue sky. It’s the perfect place to center yourself and figure out what you want.”

I forced a nod.

Man, I was exhausted. The idea of centering myself felt impossible. I’d been running on empty since returning from England, and the flight to Antigua wasn’t helping.

But holy cow it was beautiful.

As I walked out of the airport and headed for the docks, I couldn’t help looking around me, smelling that salty sea air, gazing at the stunning palm trees against the blue sky backdrop. Whoever was getting married in this place was insanely lucky. An amazing choice for the couple…if they both made it to the altar.

I swallowed and closed my eyes against visions from my wedding day. They weren’t as forceful as they once were, but they still stung and lashed my already tender wounds. It was enough to put me off marriage for life.

Funny how that thought hurt too.

Harry’s impulsive proposal whistled through my mind as I boarded the boat. A fist squeezed my heart to a mushy pulp when I remembered walking into that pub and saying yes, imagining we’d have a life together.

I thumped onto the wooden bench, clutching my bag strap and blinking rapidly.

“You okay?” Sarah touched my arm.

I nodded then went for a quick distraction so she wouldn’t look too closely at my locked jaw and flaring nostrils. “Justin here?”

Sarah shook her head but didn’t look at me when she answered. “No, he’s holding up the fort back home. We’ve got another wedding next weekend, which he’s doing last-minute details for.” She whipped back to face me, a bright smile on her lips. “Besides, I didn’t want him getting in our way.” She winked then squeezed my knee when I didn’t smile back. “This is going to be good for you. It’s a private island with only wedding guests, so it won’t be overcrowded. I do have to work, but when I’m free we can grab a glass of wine and go find a quiet place to hang, and when I’m busy you can just enjoy the luxury of the resort.”

I forced a tight smile.

Gazing out across the ocean, I focused on the sound of the waves hitting the boat, the bump and sway as we made our way to the small island. The water was a vibrant turquoise, so clear I could see my toes if I dunked them in.

Just like the water Harry and I had jumped into.

The memory was so crystal clear in my mind. His funny muscle-man poses, comparing himself to a demigod and then softly calling me Aphrodite.

My eyes burned and I turned away from my friend. The wind ruffled tendrils of hair against my cheek. I tucked them behind my ear to stop the tickle.

Sarah told me all about the resort as we went, no doubt trying to fuel my enthusiasm.

By the time we pulled into the shore, she’d wrapped up her sales pitch and I was grateful for it. She was making the place sound a little too magical and I was wise enough to know that magic didn’t exist…not in my life anyway.

“Welcome to Jumby Bay!” A gorgeous attendant with dark eyes and a white smile helped me off the boat.

I let go of his hand and walked down the pier toward the luxury white buildings with their orange tiled roofs. Perfectly cut lawn, bordered with palm trees, paved the way to a pristine white villa that was obviously the reception and restaurant area. Rooms must have been on the second floor, and I wondered which one I’d be sharing with Sarah. I assumed we were sharing; how else would she get me the room for free?

“We don’t need to worry about checking you in. I’ve already got the room organized.” Sarah grinned, then asked the valet to take my bags. “Why don’t you follow him and go freshen up. I’ll join you shortly. I just need to check in with the manager about a quick wedding thing.”

“Okay.” I nodded and followed the porter, gazing around me as I went.

He placed the bag Mom packed for me into the back of a golf cart and indicated for me to sit. It was hard to resist his friendly smile, and I gave him a polite grin as I sat down beside him.

Thankfully he didn’t try to strike up any conversation. Instead he hummed as we drove around the curving pathway. Lush vegetation that had been tamed by expert gardeners grew on my right while the vast ocean lapped against the rocks on our left. The salty breeze cooled my skin, urging me to relax. Tucking my bangs behind my ear, I adjusted my shades and willed myself to listen.

I couldn’t come somewhere this beautiful only to be consumed by sadness. If I was going to think straight, I did need to relax.

The cart stopped outside a luxurious villa and I gave the porter a bemused frown. “Here?”

“Yes, here.” He grinned, the smile taking over his face.

Jumping out, he grabbed my bags, and I followed him up the path to a place that looked like it was reserved for celebrity guests. I was surprised they’d put Sarah up in such flashy accommodation. I supposed she
was
organizing their big event. It made me wonder how amazing the couple’s villa must be.

The porter opened the door, and I was expecting to walk into a cacophony of wedding gear—a table covered with centerpieces, bridesmaids’ dresses, and shoes neatly lined up for the day. Possibly a lavish wedding gown she’d made.

But when the porter ushered me inside, all I saw was a pristine villa. Beautiful cane couches with plump white cushions and turquoise throw pillows sat in a U-shape on the large beige tiles. The bifold doors were open, giving me a view of palm trees and sparkling ocean. Dividing the villa from the beach was a gorgeous swimming pool surrounded by comfy-looking deck chairs.

I gaped at the porter, who just kept smiling as he placed my bag in the bedroom. With a polite nod, he excused himself and left me to get settled.

It took me a few moments to move. I was still too stunned by what Sarah had arranged for me.

Sliding off my long-sleeve shirt, I folded it as I walked into the bedroom, figuring I should probably open up my bag and find out what my mother had actually packed.

But as I walked into the room, I spotted something on the bed that made me jerk to a stop.

In the middle of the navy blue duvet, about a foot down from the mountain of plump pillows, was a small ring box. The lid was open…and inside was a diamond ring that had an old
passed down through the generations
kind of look about it.

I gasped. My first thought was that the porter must have accidentally dropped me at the bridal suite. Humiliation swept through me and I was about to grab my bag and run to find Sarah when someone stepped out from hiding and whispered, “Hello, Jane.”

My eyes glassed with instant tears as I gazed across the room at Harry.

He was dressed in slacks and a rumpled shirt. His hair was a mess, his face peppered with light stubble. But his eyes froze me. They drank me in, sparkling with affection as a slow smile drew out his lips.

“Wh…” I breathed then pointed to the ring on the bed then back to him. “Wha…?”

His snicker was soft as he scratched the back of his neck and inched to the edge of the bed. “I know you told me this was too hard, but I just had to see you. I had to give this one more chance. So, please, if you could just hear me out…and then if you still don’t want to…I’ll go.”

I rubbed my forehead. “Does Sarah know—?”

“It was her idea.”

“Right.” I crossed my arms and glanced at the ring again. My heart was throbbing in my chest, pounding through my head and making it hard to hear.

I closed my eyes and drew in a breath. As soon as they popped back open, Harry started talking, his voice husky and earnest.

“I know you’re scared, and I am too. I know our histories are connected in this horrible way, and I wish you’d never had to face that, Jane. But the truth is, it’s in the past. We were wrong to hide it from each other, but maybe it was fate. If we’d known the truth we never would have had the chance to fall in love, but now I want to tell you everything. I want to know you, Jane, and I want you to know me. I want to build a life with you.” His smile was deep with yearning. “Nothing we do or say can change what happened. The only thing we can control is what we do with the here and now.” His fingers curled into a fist, which he tapped against his palm. “I wish I could stand here and promise you that everything’s going to work out. But I can’t. Because I don’t know what the future’s going to dish up. I don’t know if we’ll have a day, a week, a decade, a lifetime together. It’s what I want but I can’t promise it.” He sighed and cringed, running a hand through his hair as if he was annoyed at screwing up his speech.

I wanted to tell him to keep going, that he was doing great, but I couldn’t speak.

“Look, all I can promise is to love you in every moment that I’m given. And right now, I want to marry you. And tomorrow, if we’re lucky enough to wake up beside each other, I will cherish you then too…and the next day and the day after that. I will love you and care for you for as long as life gives me. I can say that with absolute conviction because you breathed life back into me and I can’t live without you now.” His voice wobbled. “I love you so much.”

Tears were making it impossible to see. I slashed them off my cheeks and sniffed. Harry was still blurry, but I managed to see him grab the box off the bed and walk toward me. Dropping to one knee, he held up the ring.

“I know it’s terrifying. Love is dangerous and it can tear you in half, but I think us together is worth that risk. So to hell with it, Janey. Let’s jump into life together, eh? What do you say?”

It took a moment for me to swallow. I wiped a few more tears off my cheeks before giving him a wonky smile and whispering, “Geronimo.”

His desperate expression dropped away and he gaped at me for a moment. “Geronimo?”

My head bobbed erratically. “Geronimo.”

A wide smile burst across his face and he jumped up, grabbing me into a hug and spinning us around. “Geronimo!”

I laughed and cried, making these stupid whimpering sounds as he placed me down and slipped the ring on my shaky finger.

“It’s Nan’s,” he murmured, his eyes shining as he smiled at me. “She wanted you to have it.”

I touched the cluster of diamonds, cherishing how truly precious it was. The thought that his sweet grandmother had passed it on only intensified my tears.