GreekQuest (3 page)

14

 

“Well, I mean, I'm flattered, of course and if that's the custom here, obviously I must become your paidonomos, although I'm sure I can never measure up, even in a small degree, to the example set by your late lamented ex-paidonomos. Yet, nonetheless ...”

While you're waffling on in this ludicrous manner, there's a sudden small commotion on the edge of the crowd around you and a slimly built, lightly bearded man breaks through. He is sweating heavily, gasping like a fish out of water and looks, frankly, as if he could do with several nights sleep.

He stands in front of you fighting for breath. Eventually he wheezes, “Are you the paidonomos?”

“Looks like it,” you tell him, “although I'm new to the job.”

“My name is Pheidippides,” he tells you.

It means nothing to you, but causes a stir in the crowd. A young man on your left leans forward and whispers in your ear, “The famous athlete, Paidonomos. Gold medal in the last Olympics.”

“What can I do for you, Pheidippides?” you ask, impressed.

“Message from General Miltiades,” he says and actually salutes. “Remember that business with the Persians a couple of years ago?”

You look at him blankly, but fortunately the young man on your left comes to the rescue again. “King Darius sent ambassadors to Greece demanding that everybody here accept him as their master. The Athenians threw them into a pit.,” he whispers.

“I remember it well,” you tell Pheidippides loudly.

“I'm afraid King Darius wasn't too pleased,” the athlete tells you. “His fleet has just landed at Marathon Bay.”

Marathon? The name rings bells. “Where's Marathon Bay?” you whisper out of the side of your mouth.

“Just north of Athens,” the young man on your left tells you quietly.

“We've counted six hundred ships and our estimate is they're carrying a hundred thousand men,” Pheidippides goes on. “The standing army at Athens is only about nine thousand strong. General Miltiades sent me to Sparta to ask for help.”

 

Looks like you're involved in a crisis in Greek history. But what are you going to do about it? Now you're Paidonomos, you've got your own little army to command, so maybe you should tell them to go back with him at
65
As against that, half your people are little better than children, so the decent thing might be to go with him personally on your own and advise the Athenians how to fight their war. That's something you can do at
81
Or, of course, you can simply refuse to send help at
137
.

 

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15

 

“Wrong!” shouts the huge man, casually hurling you all the way to 61.

 

So pick yourself up, dust yourself off and select another destination from your
61
map.

 

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16

 

It's dark. It's very dark. It's smelly.

Strewth - there's a bear in here!

 

What do you expect in a bear cave? The animal has 75 Life Points and a very unpleasant disposition. It can hit you with +5 on every blow. Your only chance is that it might be hibernating. Roll one die. Score 5 or 6 and it's hibernating, in which case you can creep back to
10
and select another path out. Score 1, 2, 3, 4 and it's awake and ready for bother. If this encounter kills you, go to
13
. If not, limp back to
10
and keep out of caves in future.

 

Please select an option from the previous page.

17

 

“Here's my Cup,” you tell him cheerfully. “Bet you didn't think I had one.”

“Never crossed my mind,” he tells you blandly. “Now, up you get onto the platform and just knock on the door of that little stone building at the back.”

“You're sure this doesn't involve animal sacrifice?” you ask.

“Positive,” he says.

So you trot across the massive altar to the little stone building at the back and knock on the door, which flies open violently as two enormous men burst out.

“What have we here, Sophocles?” asks one, grinning down at you wickedly.

“Looks like another upstart wants to make the ultimate sacrifice, Plato,” replies his companion.

With which they both fall upon you with whirling swords.

 

Looks like the only animal in danger of sacrifice is you. And by two clowns pretending to be Ancient Greek philosophers at that. Sophocles has 50 Life Points and a sword that hits at +4. Plato has 35 Life Points and forgot to sharpen his sword this morning so it only hits at +2. Unfortunately the element of surprise is on their side so they both get first strikes against you. Apart from that, everything's rosy.

If you make the ultimate sacrifice, go to
13
. If you manage to dispatch Sophocles and Plato, collect your special pass and a jar of ointment (good for a single application restoring a double dice roll of Life Points) and head for your map at
61
to select another destination.

 

Please select an option from the previous page.

18

 

As you walk into this clearing, you're set upon by robbers.

 

Throw one die to discover how many there are. Each one has 25 Life Points and a +3 dagger. If the encounter kills you, there's a pauper's burial awaiting you at
13
. If you overcome the robbers, you can add to your collection of +3 daggers and select any one of the following paths out of here: east to
42
, south west to
67
, north west to
78
or north to
58
.

 

Please select an option from the previous page.

19

 

The world suddenly begins to spin around you. Your eyes dim. There is a ringing in your ears. You find yourself falling ...

 

... all the way to the dreaded
13
.

Just kidding. You actually fall all the way to
9
which is a much better place to be.

 

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20

 

You're on a rocky hillside looking down into a wooded valley. The sun is shining and there's a baby on the ground beside you. Your sudden appearance must have startled him because he begins to cry.

 

A baby in a gamebook? What sort of adventure is this? But now you're stuck with the brat, what are you going to do about him? You might think of creeping off quietly and leaving him to his fate at
140
. Otherwise you can begin an adventure full of sleepless nights and nappies by taking him with you at
120
.

 

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21

 

You give a weak smile and begin to tip-toe back towards the entrance.

“Oh no you don't!” shouts someone, laughing.

At once a sun-tanned horde descends upon you to rip off all your gear and fling you, protesting wildly, into the pool.

Suddenly you stop worrying about nudity. The pool is absolutely freezing.

 

So much so that three of your Life Points turn into icicles and drop off before you can stop them. If this kills you, go to
13
. If not, you can continue to freeze at
60
.

 

Please select an option from the previous page.

22

 

As you sit in deep meditation, your muscles relax, your blood pressure drops, your brain begins to generate deep alpha waves, your galvanic skin response changes, your third eye opens and your lymph nodes stimulate your immune response.

(The result of which is that you gain an additional ten Life Points which you can add to your present total even if you're currently at your maximum. The bad news is that this only happens the first time you meditate, so you can't keep doing it until you turn into Superperson®.)

You open your eyes to find Zeus standing in front of you with an impatient expression on his face. “Have you got the Judgement of Paris Certificate?” he asks stiffly.

 

If you happen to have a Judgement of Paris Certificate about your person, you can give it to Zeus at
29
. Otherwise you'll have to make your apologies to Zeus and move on regenerated, revived and refreshed north to
99
, south east to
10
or south west to
58
.

 

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23

 

The world starts to swim around you. There is a ringing in your ears. Your eyesight dims.

“Too late!” you gasp.

 

As you slip into the dark depths of
13
.

 

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24

 

“An intellectual such as myself never backs away from such a challenge,” you say coolly. “Lay it on me, Ancient Greek Baby.”

“I am Zeno of Elea,” he tells you. “I'm known as a Greek philosopher, even though I'm actually an Italian - a situation that's given me a taste for paradox. Are you interested in paradoxes?”

“If I were to say I was lying, I'd be telling the truth,” you reply paradoxically.

His face breaks into a broad smile. “Excellent!” he exclaims. “You've just the sort of mind we need. May I introduce Achilles and Arthur?” He gestures towards his companions. “Arthur's the tortoise.”

You nod an acknowledgement to them both. They nod back briefly.

“Achilles is the fastest sprinter in the whole of Greece,” Zeno tells you. “Arthur is the slowest tortoise. They're about to run a race. The question is who will win. To make it fair, we'll give Arthur one yard of a head start.”

“That's easy -” you start to say.

But Zeno holds up his hand. “Before you make up your mind, remember Zeno's Paradox,” he tells you.

You blink. “What's Zeno's Paradox?”

But he's fallen into deep thought and doesn't answer.

 

Looks as if you're going to have to work this one out for yourself. If you think Achilles will win, turn to
31
If you think the tortoise will win, make your way to
46
And I suppose to cover every eventuality you might decide neither will win at
64
, or that both will win in a dead heat at
54
.

 

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25

 

“Well done!” calls a sophisticated voice with an upper-crust accent as you stand gasping among the carnage. “Someone with your fighting abilities will go far in Sparta!”

You turn to discover the fight was witnessed by a distinguished-looking nobleman seated astride a horse.

“Thank you, sir,” you reply a little breathlessly. “But talking of Sparta, can you tell me how to get to that city?”

“I'm afraid ‘city' is a grandiose term earned because we Spartans beat up anybody who doesn't use it. Sparta is actually that collection of five villages you may have noticed at the edge of the plain. Your fastest route is via 61 where you can make good use of this map.”

With which he hands you a rolled parchment, a bottle of retsina, salutes and rides off.

 

So what are you waiting for? Get on down to
61
. Although you might like to take a swig of that retsina before you do anything else. Each gulp will restore a double dice roll of Life Points. Throw one die to determine how many gulps are left in the bottle.

 

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26

 

“Wrong!” exclaims the guard, neatly lopping your head off with one swing of his sword.

 

Look up at him from the grass while consciousness dims, then go to
13
.

 

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27

 

“Wrong!” shouts the huge man, casually hurling you all the way to 61.

 

So pick yourself up, dust yourself off and select another destination from your
61
map.

 

Please select an option from the previous page.

28

 

You start to argue with the priest and inadvertently breathe in the smoke.

 

Go to
13
.

 

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29

 

Zeus glances at the certificate. “Have you ever noticed how difficult it is to make history turn out any other way than the way it's always turned out?” he asks.

You look at him blankly. “I don't follow you.”

“The whole Trojan War started because Paris decided Aphrodite was the most beautiful goddess,” he tells you. “I was half hoping you might have got him to pick one of the others. But you didn't and now Aphrodite has sent him the most beautiful woman in the world who happens to be a young lady called Helen.”

“What's wrong with that?” you ask.

“She happens to be married,” Zeus says soberly. “To Menelaus, king of Sparta. Now Menelaus will think Paris has abducted her and march on Troy, so the wars starts after all. You'd better get over there and sort it out directly.”

 

With which he waves a casual hand and sends you forward in time and space to
49
.

 

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