Guarded Hearts (15 page)

I nod. “Now I am.”

“So when you said earlier that you were a virgin, what did you mean?”

“So that’s the first question you want to ask?”

“No, but I think you have cried enough for tonight. So?”

“Exactly what the definition means. I have never slept with anyone before.”

“Brett?” he asks, clearly confused. Because everyone still thinks that we were a real college couple. Apparently all college couples do is have sex.

“People saw what I wanted them to see, even Brett.”

“Is that why you guys broke up, because he wanted to sleep with you?”

“No, he thought he had. I was just tired of the asshole. And I had found someone else that made me feel alive like never before. You have to know that I projected a young reckless girl, having the time of her life with her quarterback boyfriend, but that was furthest from the truth. I hated Brett, still hate that jerk. That day outside class I had just told him that I had faked our sexual relationship, and that’s why he was upset. He didn’t take no for an answer during the Homecoming party. That’s why I asked for a ride home.”

“I was insanely jealous of that bastard that night. You looked super hot in your red dress. I think I got a hard on that night. And to think that he was trying to force you to sleep with him.”

“I don’t want to fake it with you, Nix. I am ready for the next step already.” I put a finger on his lips before he can protest. “Nix, I’m super sure, so don’t question it. Or are you not ready, because I could wait for you if you want. I don’t want to rush you,” I try to joke.

“Baby, you don’t know how ready I am. Remember that I’m a guy, so eighty-eight percent of the time all I think about is you naked, and twelve percent of the time I think about tasting you,” he responds.

“Well, good to know that I will always be the brains in our relationship. Besides, there is too much talking and not enough action.”

“Okay, beautiful, get ready for me to rock your world,” he whispers into my ear before licking it.

“What are we in the 90s? Who still uses that line?” I laugh. And then all thoughts leave my mind.

He starts to lick his way down my neck working his way to my lips, which he proceeds to kiss softly at first, but then he starts to devour me. He always takes my breath away, but right now I feel like literally he took it from me. I grip his waist to keep from falling on my face. I feel the wall behind me, and then it disappears. I feel him losing his hold on my lips.

“Babe, turn around” he whispers into my mouth. I do, and I come to find that we have moved from the studio room to just outside his bedroom. Really, this guy is a hazard as he makes me forget everything around me except him. Yeah, warning labels are needed with this lick-a-licious guy.

I grab his face with my hands and put my lips on his and kiss the shit out of him. All my fears have been washed away, all my walls have crumbled, and all because of this gorgeous guy who has shown me the light I so desperately sought.

He hugs me close, trying to fuse our bodies together. I suddenly feel the bed behind my knees. He picks me up and moves me to the middle of the bed. He starts to kiss my eyes, my nose, my cheeks and then my mouth before he moves to my neck and trails his tongue from there towards my ear and back before he takes my earlobe into his mouth and starts to suck it. Oh my fucking God. This feels so delicious. We have made out before, but today really feels like the first time. My senses are super aware of every kiss, every touch, and every lick. I start to run my hand underneath his shirt, feeling his wash board abs. I feel his lips going towards my chest, giving me little nibbles on my skin.

He starts to unbutton my dress, placing kisses on the skin being exposed. He gets to the last button right on top of my belly button and starts to suck on that piece of skin. He grabs my waist and slowly starts to pulls me up so that I can lock my legs around his waist. He glides his hand up my torso, opening my dress even more until he gets to my shoulders where he runs his hands towards my back so that I can remove my dress. He grabs the fabric with both hands and literally tears the dress in half. Who would ever have guessed that getting undressed could be so erotic? I feel his half-hooded eyes on my body. I can see all the passionate lust in those beautiful grey eyes. I only hope that my eyes reflect the same thing to him.

He brings his mouth back to me, and once again I am treated to those kissable lips of his. He retraces his kisses back to my chest, and with one warm finger, lowers the purple lace blocking my nipple from his lips. He takes my nipple into his mouth and I feel like mush, fire is running through my veins, my skin breaking out in goose bumps.

“Are you cold, baby?” Nix asks in between sucking my nipple and pushing my bra off my other nipple to rub it between his fingers.

“No, it’s just my skin coming alive for you, mi
Amor
,” I respond breathlessly. He starts sucking my nipples one at a time. I’m wiggling under him. My panties are wet. He reaches behind me to unclasp my bra and removes it from my body.

“God, you are beautiful, Olivia,” he says huskily. I start to run my hands to his waist and grab his shirt to remove it. I want to his body, too. I love seeing his artwork on the beautiful canvas that is his skin. I’m not as graceful as him; I just throw it off the bed. I lift my body towards him and start kissing his chest and bring his nipple into my mouth. I hear him give a little growl. That’s all the encouragement I need to nibble on his body. He plunges his hands in my hair when I take his nipple into my mouth again and start sucking it hard. He moves me on to my back and starts licking his way down, his arms staying next to my face, so I turn to my right and start licking and kissing his forearm, over the tattoos.

“No, O, my scars,” he says a little harshly, trying to move his arm from the reach of my mouth, but I grab him and press my lips harder over his burnt skin.

“Nix, they are beautiful. You are mine, scars and all. Just let me,” I say.

“So stubborn.” I feel him smile against my skin. And he continues his slow journey down my body until he gets to the edge of my panties and licks the skin under them. He sits up and removes my panties.

“Babe, I know you want to be gentle and romantic, and I appreciate that, seriously I do, but I need you in me now. I can’t stand the torture,” I pout.

“Baby, you are not ready yet. I want to make it as bearable as I can without causing you any pain,” he says right before I feel his tongue on my pussy lips. I arch off the bed completely, but he puts a hand on my abdomen to anchor me. He starts licking my pussy walls before taking my clit into his mouth and sucks hard, and I feel myself get wetter.

“Fuckin’ hell, don’t stop. I will fuckin’ kill you. This feels so good,” I exclaim.

“Such a dirty mouth, baby,” he says as I feel every syllable run through my pussy to my very core. I am coming undone. I feel a small pressure against my opening as he inserts a finger to help stretch it out, and with it I feel a small bit of discomfort. He starts driving his finger in and out as he is licks my pussy like his life depends on it. I start panting and my breathing is becoming shallow. I can feel a build up as he inserts a second finger. Then I explode into a thousand pieces. I can feel his tongue replacing his fingers and he is sucking me dry as I come down from the high he took me to. The feeling is so intense that I start pulling his head away and closer to my pussy at the same time.

“You taste as sweet as I imagined, baby. So fucking good. This is my new favorite taste. I will remember your taste and the smell of your arousal until the day I die, O.” I feel him spread my thighs wider as he reaches for a condom from his dresser. I hear him tear the foil, and for the first time I hear the music coming from his iPod. Leave it to Nix to always have music playing. Music he says can always represent a special moment in your life, and we all have a soundtrack.

“What the name of that song, Nix?” I ask so that I can add to in my life story. The first orgasm in my life with the one and only man that will own my heart forever.

“All shook up by Avila,” he responds. Oh yeah, totally adequate for how I feel with him as this moment. “I will go slowly at first so you can get use to the size,” he tells me as his cock touches my opening.

“I thought I was ready when you had your fingers in me?”

“O, my fingers don’t compare to the size of my penis, sweetheart. Not to sound cocky, but I’m way bigger than that,” he says as starts to move little by little. I feel my vagina start to stretch to accommodate his size. He is holding on by a thread as he is making progress. He starts to give me one of his heart stopping kisses as I feel him pull out and then thrust in to the hilt. I gasp as he tears through my virginal barrier and holds still.

“Sorry, baby, I couldn’t help it,” he tells me as he kisses away the single tear that I didn’t even know I shed.

“I’m okay. It just caught me by surprise.”

He starts the rhythm that is as old as time, thrusting in and out. His tempo starts to go faster as I feel my body tense up again, ready for the burst of fireworks that I know is about to come.

“Oh, baby, I’m so close. Are you close again, babe? I want to come together,” Nix says through clenched teeth, trying to grasp his sanity. Always thinking about me first. God, I love him.

“Let go, baby. I’m close too,” I answer, panting with the rhythm. I grab his ass to get closer, to feel his cock buried so deep in me.

“Fuck!” we yell at the same time, as my world comes apart. Nope, I was so not ready for the feeling of being thrown into a world without gravity. The fire I feel running all over my body is just… wow. He always leaves me speechless. I can hear my heartbeat mix with his as it’s trying to get back to a normal. We are in an inferno of arms and legs. It’s so hot. I can smell our own distinct scents mix together with the smell of sex whirling around the room.

He moves his body off me and I automatically feel myself getting cold. “Don’t go,” I say.

“I’m just going to get something to clean us up. I’ll be right back.” Sure enough, I feel something wet and warm in-between my legs as he cleans me up. I get a little self-conscious, so I try to close my thighs together. He gently runs his hand down my inner thigh, and as if he is the key wide again. Shameless. He goes back and disposes of the rag and climbs back into bed and wraps himself around me. I’m in my new favorite place, his arms. He turns on the side lamp and looks down at me.

“Are you okay, baby? Did I hurt you?” He questions, looking straight into my soul.

“I’m super fucking deliciously awesome,” I respond with a big smile. “
Eres el aire que respiro,”
I whisper quietly. He is the air I breathe, no doubts in my mind and my heart.

He moves on to his back and I cuddle him with my head on his chest. I start to trace his tattoos over his heart. I have never looked closely at his tats, and earlier when I took his shirt off I was in a cloudy state of mind. I start to place kisses on his chest.

Wait, what?

He has the name Sky tattooed over his heart. What the hell? How did I miss that? I stiffen in his arms. I knew he was not a virgin, and yes, he probably has fallen in love before, but to put the name of that person on your skin means commitment.

“O, what’s wrong?” He asks as I try to wiggle myself out of the warm arms that I love so much because they make me feel safe.

“When were you going to tell me about her, Nix?” I ask coldly. I turn around, I don’t want to see his face. The best moment of my life just got snatched away by a stupid bitch’s name. I shouldn’t care, but I have always been insecure, feeling unwanted.

“Huh? About who, Livi?” He sounds confused. I feel tears threaten to spill. Gosh, I was so happy and content about two seconds ago.

“Did you love her?” I ask with a quiver in my voice. No, I am not going to cry, it’s in his past. Olivia,
he is with you now. But why does it hurt?.

“Olivia, turn around and look at me, sweetheart. I have no idea who you are talking about,” he replies.

I turn to face him, and his face full of concern and confusion as if I had started to grow another head.

“Sky, did you love her?” I ask with a frown pointing towards the tattoo. I can see the confusion lift from his face and the frown being replaced with a smirk.

“Why, is the famous Olivia Rey jealous?” He laughs.

“I don’t think this is funny, Nix. Answer my fucking question!” I yell, my hurt turning into anger.

“Did I love Sky? Yes, I did. I will love and remember him until the day I die,” he responds.

“You lied to me. You said that you had never fallen in love before. Wait, did you say him?” I ask, taken aback. Now I’m confused.

“Olivia, Sky is my male friend that I told you about, the one that died in the car accident where I got my burns. And I didn’t lie to you; you will always be my first love.” He opens his arms for me, and I crawl back on to his lap, hugging him tight. Gosh, I’m so relived. I know I shouldn’t feel jealous or hurt about his past, even if it was a girl, but I’m selfish like that. Again why did I automatically think it was a girl’s name?

“Come on, let’s go to sleep,” he says as he settles us into comfortable positions for the night. He kisses my head and tucks me tight into him. Yep, best night of my life, and my favorite place in the world. I close my eyes and dream about happily ever after’s for the first time in my life.