Had to Be You: Bad Boys of Red Hook (25 page)

“Do you mind? So I drifted. Sue me. What the hell do you expect? I’m worried sick. Okay? I mean, you didn’t see Slater. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone so, so . . . haunted. And he kicked me out—”

Bree moved closer and pulled her into a hug. “He didn’t kick you out, he just needed some space.”

“Yeah. Then he disappears. How much space does he need?”

“He didn’t go far.”

“How the hell do you know? He could be in Bah-fuckin’-rain for all we know.”

Bree pulled away and raised her eyebrows. “Well, it’s like this. Storm and Logan both disappeared so you know the three musketeers are together.”

Rocki shrugged. “Okay, that makes sense. So they wouldn’t run off to Bahrain.”

“And”—Bree shrugged—“I LoJacked Storm’s phone. . . . All I have to do is pull up the app, and I’ll know exactly where he is—within fifty feet and, therefore, we’ll know where Slater and Logan are too.”

Rocki let out a laugh, probably the first since Nicki took a dip in the lake. “I love you, Bree. I love every evil inch of you.”

“Hey, I prefer to think of myself as slightly wicked. And believe me, Storm appreciates my wicked tendencies.”

Patrice laughed. “Girlfriend, turn that thing on and let’s find out where they are. Then we can plan our attack.”

It took a minute for Slater to figure out that the knocking was coming from the door and not the inside of his skull. The knocking amplified the pain—not good. He loved his brothers, he really did. And he’d never loved them more than today—or was it yesterday? But all the love in the world didn’t keep him from wanting to kick their collective asses.

He laid the picture of his mother he’d fallen asleep with on the bedside table, pulled on his jeans, and opened the door as fast as he could, hoping one of them would be leaning against it and end up on the floor.

“Rocki?” Slater shook his head to make sure he wasn’t seeing things. When she didn’t disappear, he swallowed hard and almost choked.

She stood wide-eyed, staring at him. Man, her eyes were big to begin with, but when she looked at him like that, they were huge, and total backbone breakers.

He cleared his throat, or tried to. “Rocki? What are you doing here?”

She fooled with the hem of the sweatshirt she wore—one of his—and with the cuffs all rolled up, it hung to midthigh.

“Did Pop tell you where I was?”

“No.” She slipped through the door.

He didn’t stop her; he couldn’t if he’d wanted to, the look in her eyes just about gutted him.

“Pete didn’t tell me anything. I know someone who LoJacked her husband’s phone. She’s just a little bit evil, but her husband seems to like that about her. Go figure.”

“Storm and Logan are next door.”

Rocki kicked off her shoes and sat on his bed. “We know. Jerry Schmidt, he’s a regular.”

“Not surprising.” Slater sat beside her and watched, not sure where all this was going. “Between Bree and Patrice, they know everyone who’s anyone.”

Rocki took a deep breath and tucked her hands under her legs. “Sl—”

“Roc—”

They spoke at the same time.

Rocki looked relieved. “You go first.”

He shook his head and regretted the movement. “No, you go ahead.”

She bit her lip, which just made him want to kiss her. She really did have one hell of a mouth. “I didn’t come to bug you. I understand that you need time.”

“I’m sorry.”

Rocki jumped off the bed. “Let me finish. Don’t say anything. Then I’ll leave you alone.”

The thought of her leaving had his stomach visiting his toes. “What if I don’t want to be left alone?”

“If you didn’t want to be alone, why the hell did you come here?”

“I wanted to be alone when I came.” Now he didn’t know what the hell was going on. All he wanted to do was hold her. He caught her by the waist and pulled her toward the bed, so she stood between his splayed legs and rested his forehead against her.

“Has that changed?” Her hands cupped his head, her fingers threaded through his too long hair.

He didn’t know. God, he couldn’t afford to be wrong about this. He squeezed his eyes shut, not sure what to say. “You’re wearing my sweatshirt.”

“It was with Nicki’s things when we brought her home from the hospital. It smells like you.”

Damn, what the hell kind of father was he? He didn’t think to ask about Nicki until Rocki mentioned her. “Is Nicki okay?” He didn’t want to look at Rocki; he might not have been able to feel shame before, but he sure as hell felt it now. Heat shot up his neck like a geyser. What kind of father ran away from his own child? What must Rocki think of him?

“She’s afraid that you left because she fell through the ice. I told her it wasn’t about her, but she’s a kid. They think everything is about them.”

“Damn.”

“She’ll be fine.”

“I never wanted to hurt her. I never wanted to hurt you, but I hurt you both. I wanted to protect you. That’s why I left.”

“Protect us from what?”

“From me.”

Rocki’s fingers tensed in his hair and she pulled his head back so he had to either look her in the eye or risk going bald. “What the hell are you talking about? Explain, dammit.”

He’d seen Rocki pissed, and tonight there were sparks shooting out of her eyes without the aid of a fireplace. Yeah, that was all her. God, he loved her.

“I remembered everything . . . I was afraid that . . . no, I was terrified that something in me could snap, and I’d turn into a monster and end up hurting you and Nicki, and not just your feelings. I was afraid I’d hurt you.”

“Because of your birth father?”

“It’s not that much of a stretch, Rocki.”

“It’s ludicrous.”

“How do you know?”

“Because”—she pushed him back onto the bed and straddled him—“I know you.” Rocki walked her hands up his chest. “I’ve watched you.” She kissed his scar, nuzzled his neck, and stretched out on him. “I’ve slept with you. I’ve seen how protective you are of both Nicki and me. When you had that nightmare, you rolled over me like you were protecting me from whatever it was you dreamed about.”

“I dreamed of him.” He wrapped his arms around her and held on to her like she was some kind of security blanket. God, he was a grown man, and was talking to his girlfriend about nightmares.

“I know you did. I’m sorry. But what you have to remember is your first thought was to protect me. You saved Nicki’s life. You’d have gone in after her and done whatever it took to make sure she was okay. Heck, the first day I met you, you insisted on taking me home to make sure I was safe. You just don’t have it in you to hurt anyone.”

“How can you be so sure? Rocki, I’m related to a murderer.”

“So? You lived through that. You’re not a monster. If you were going to turn into a psychopath, it would have happened by now. But your father—Pete—raised you to be the man you are today. The man I love. I trust you and I will spend my life loving you.”

“It’s that easy?” God, how could she do that? Be so fucking certain?

“Slater, it’s never easy, but it’s not complicated. I love you and that’s just the way it is. I can’t change it, and I wouldn’t if I could. So take all the time you need. I’ll be here waiting for you.”

“You mean it?” He looked into her clear blue eyes. “Just as easy as that?”

“Like I said, it’s not complicated. Definitely difficult, but not complicated. Slater, there’s no one else I want. No one I love. No one I trust more than you. Only you. It had to be you.” She wrapped her arms around him, pulling him into a kiss, the kiss full of understanding, desperation, passion, and love.

One kiss, a melding of breath, the mating of tongues, the touch of her lips, and the nip of her teeth, and he was sure of one thing: He never wanted to live without her. He’d planned to, but she had a way of bending the steel of his resolve into a pretzel. He was putty in her hands and her hands were all over him. God, only Rocki could get him hard on the third worst day of his life. Frankly, he was amazed he was functioning at all.

“Slater?” She stared into his eyes, taking his heart out for a spin. She tugged on the partially open fly of his jeans. “Make love to me.”

His body felt like one big exposed nerve. Every touch, every taste, the scent of her, the feel of her body above him, and the way her hair felt against his skin had him shaking with need. By the time her clothes hit the floor, he feasted on her like she was his last meal. And as far as he was concerned, she was.

Rocki filled his heart, his soul; expanding places he didn’t even know he had. Her love wrapped around him like her body, surrounding him, driving him, pushing him to the breaking point, testing his limits, his strength, and his control over and over again.

•   •   •

Rocki might have been on top of Slater but he somehow controlled her every movement and it was driving her crazy. She didn’t come here wanting to break the record for orgasms during one session. No, she wanted to make Slater feel. He was always so damn controlled, and if she had her way, tonight he was going to lose that control and realize that sometimes, control was highly overrated.

She moved down the length of his body, slapping his hands away, afraid he’d shatter her resolve. She kissed her way down his tight stomach, tracing the lines of his muscles with her tongue, nipping at his skin, and ignored the way he tried to tug her back.

She watched his eyes as she moved lower, slipping the head of his erection between her lips. He groaned and stilled beneath her. Damn his control. She had plenty of time, and she planned to use it. She ran her tongue around the head, pressing against the slit, tasting him.

His hands fisted in the sheets, his entire body shook beneath her. His groan sounded like a plea, one she ignored.

Rocki cupped him with one hand, the other followed her mouth up and down the length of his shaft. She used everything she knew, every weapon at her command—her tongue, teeth, suction, increasing the strength of her grip until he begged. She took control, took him high, just to back off, and tease him.

Slater’s chest worked like bellows, his groans sounded animalistic, his eyes darkened until the irises disappeared.

It was a battle of wills she was determined to win. She backed off again and then watched him snap.

He flipped her over so fast, her head spun. His big body slid between her legs and he thrust into her with such force, it knocked the wind out of her.

He took her mouth in a crushing kiss, filling her lungs with his breath, taking her over so quickly she broke the sound barrier.

His dark eyes were wild, his every muscle strained as he drove her up again and slid his hands under her ass, changing the angle, going deeper, bucking harder, groaning with every thrust.

Rocki wrapped her arms around him and bit down on his shoulder at the same time she clenched her inner muscles, sending them both into an orgasmic whirlwind, ripping down their shields and leaving every emotion exposed.

Slater came so hard, so long, so strong, he thought for sure he felt the earth move, but maybe they’d just broken the bed. He’d taken her like a fucking animal; he’d completely lost control. His eyes burned and he squeezed them shut trying to stem the flow of tears as he dragged in a shuttered breath.

“Finally.”

“Finally what?”

“I get the whole superhero thing, Slater, but it’s nice to know you’re human.”

He rolled them over once he could move.

Rocki kissed the tears that streaked his cheeks. “I love you. I love the little boy you were. I love the man you are—even when you growl at my audience. I love watching you with Nicki—the way you look at her with your heart in your eyes, and I love the way you reach for me in your sleep like you don’t feel complete without me.”

She rested her chin on her hand, looking a little smug. “You don’t have to wear your cape all the time. I love what’s under the suit too. I love all of you.”

God, he’d missed her. “That’s a good thing, because I love all of you too. Can you stay? I don’t want you to go. I need you with me tonight.”

“Like you’d let me go off by myself at this time of night.”

“You’re right.” He pulled up the covers and tucked her against his side. “I still need to leave. I have a contract. I need to get my shit together and I need to do this job—I need to do it for all of us.”

“I know. When do you leave?”

“Day after tomorrow.”

“You need to spend some time with Nicki. I can be there with you if you want.”

“No, but thanks. I should be okay. I talked to the guys.”

“Oh really? What did they say?”

“They said I was a stupid shit. They might have a point. I don’t know. I need to think about it.”

“Take all the time you need. Just don’t shut me out again, okay?”

“I love you. You’re a part of me. I couldn’t shut you out if I wanted to. I’ve already tried that. It didn’t work.”

“Thank God.”

•   •   •

Slater thought leaving Rocki that morning after he dropped her off at her place was the hardest thing he’d ever done. That was until he walked into Pop’s apartment and dropped his bags.

Nicki and Pop both looked up from eating their breakfast, “Slater!” Nicki ran to him, her Hello Kitty nightgown floating around her long, spindly legs.

He caught her and pulled her to his chest, breathing in the scent of Johnson’s Baby Shampoo and Cap’n Crunch. “Hey, squirt. How are you doing?”

“I’m good now that you’re here.”

He gave her a kiss, hugged her again, and then set her down. “I was thinking we could take your bike out today, just you and me.”

“Really?” Nicki bounced on the balls of her bare feet.

“There’s someone I need to see, and it’s a great place to ride bikes.”

“Okay.”

“Why don’t you get dressed—wear something warm. I’m just going to talk to Pop for a while and then we’ll go.”

He and Pop watched Nicki run to her room.

Pop took one look at him and motioned to the door. “Go ahead down to the office and I’ll ask Logan and Skye to keep an eye on Nicki until we’re done.”

Slater rubbed the back of his neck. “Okay.”

Pop went out the door and Slater grabbed his file from his duffel. He was done with it. He’d kept the picture of his mother—that was the only thing he wanted to take with him.

He took the back stairs, started a pot of coffee, and poured two cups before letting himself into the office. He set the file on Pop’s desk. The place smelled of cigars and he was shaking his head when Pop walked in.

Slater turned and looked at his father, who pulled him into a hug. “I’ve been worried about you, son.”

“I’m okay.”

“Do I need to call Jerry? Did you boys break anything?”

“Just the bed, but that had nothing to do with fighting.”

Pop held up his hand. “I really don’t want to know.”

“Rocki found me.”

Pop laughed. “I still don’t wanta’ know. I didn’t tell her a thing, so don’t try to pin it on me.”

“Bree LoJacked Storm’s phone.”

Pop ran his hand through his hair and shook his head. “Somehow that doesn’t surprise me—she is her mother’s daughter.” He went around the desk and sat in his lecture chair. “So, when do you leave?”

“How did you know?”

“I knew the moment you walked in and saw Nicki. Guilt was written all over your face.”

“I had no idea I was such an open book.”

Pop shrugged and eyed the file. “I’ve known you a hell of a long time. You’re my son. I know you as well as you know yourself, sometimes better.”