Headphone Actor (11 page)

I waved my hand in a gesture to shoo her off. 

“Ahh, no, it was nice being able to talk to you. That’s true … I was already thinking of going home, so if you are as well, should we go home together, Takane-san?”

“Ah, well …. Today, Haruka kind of collapsed, you see. Sensei is with him at the hospital, so I have to go and bring him his things …..”

After I’d said this, Ayano gasped slightly and lowered her head. 

“I-I apologize! I stopped you without knowing about that. You have to go as soon as possible, right? Is Haruka-san’s condition alright ….?”

“Ah, no, it’s fine! He still hasn’t regained consciousness, but it doesn’t seem life-threatening, and as long as Sensei is there, he’ll be fine. And … even if I go back, I’ll just be a burden, so ….”

Those words that I ended up casually blurting out came out sounding terribly self-depreciating, and somehow, my chest began to hurt.

Why did I end up saying something like that? It had nothing to do with Ayano.

“…. Takane-san, did something happen? I’m sure that Haruka-san wouldn’t think that you’re a burden.”

“Yeah …. but it’s no good. I don’t know how to face him … That’s why, if I can, I want to just give his things to the receptionist and go home ….”

I couldn’t make up my mind. That wasn’t what I really wanted to do.

I looked up, and saw that Ayano had a look that was different than her usual gentle one. Her cheeks were slightly bloated, and she had an almost angry expression.

It was my first time seeing her with that face, and it shocked me.

“Takane-san. You’re not being honest enough with your feelings. Even though you’ve decided what you want to do, you’re scared, so you’re just making it Haruka-san’s fault, aren’t you?”

Being stared down by Ayano, I lost the mental battle.

“N-no, that’s not ….”

“No, that’s exactly it. When you see Haruka-san, you should speak to him honestly. Also ….”

As if remembering something, Ayano trailed off and made a melancholic face. 

Before speaking her next words, she took a small, deep breath.

“…. Even when you want to say something, there are times when you won’t have the chance to. However, if it’s now, you’ll definitely be able to tell him your true feelings. So please find the courage to.”

After saying this, the usual gentle expression returned to Ayano’s face.

“Ayano-chan ….”

“Well, if you get rejected, I’ll be here to comfort you! I’ll be excusing myself here, then.”

I’d fallen into a bit of a depressed mood, but my face became hot from Ayano’s words and those feelings were blown away.

I was too embarrassed to immediately give a response, and Ayano had already left towards the direction of the shoe cupboards.

“Wh-wha ….. ah …. She sure told me ….”

Ayano disappeared from view. My shoulders slumped, and once more, I began to walk towards the Science Preparation Room.

…. My true feelings.

Because I was so used to cheating myself about them, even I wasn’t sure what they were anymore.

It was too difficult for me. I didn’t know what I wanted to do.

If we could just continue to spend time together in the same classroom as we had been doing, that would have been fine.

If so, then wouldn’t it be fine to just not say anything that would make things complicated, and simply stay as we had been?

——In my heart, that kind of conflict unfolded.

Yes, this was the same as how it always was.

I’ve always done this, without saying anything, and been together with him in this way until now.

But, was it really alright like this ….?

As I thought of this, the door of the Science Preparation Room came into view.

Yes, when I opened this door every day, that would be the start of another nerve-wrecking day.

Taking a deep breath, I opened the door.

“Takane, good morning.”

The moment I blinked …. It felt like he was talking to me, but in the empty classroom, there was only the half-finished game and a mountain of textbooks piled on the desks.

My heart pounded loudly.

That was probably what I had been looking for.

I turned to go out into the corridor once more.

I finally understood ….!

The things that I had always wanted to say, I’d found them.

If it’s now, then I can say them.

Yes, if it was now, then surely ….!

With feelings that were overflowing from my chest, I kicked my feet on the ground to go to where he was as soon as possible——

…. At least, that’s how it should have been.

Suddenly, the walls of the corridor distorted, and the floor drew up towards my face at an unbelievable momentum.

With an impact as if being slammed down, my body collapsed onto the floor.

“Ah ….. ha ….. a— …. !!”

I couldn’t breathe properly.

As far as moving my body, as well, I could barely twitch my fingertips.

…. Why—Why this timing ….!

The fear that I’d forgotten began to take over my mind.

And at the same time, an unreasonable drowsiness began to take away my consciousness.

…. No. ….. No!

With no way to resist, in my gradually fading consciousness,

I finally watched with both eyes, the shadow of a person standing at the end of the corridor.

——Why was that person here?

Even though they should not have been.

Without even being able to confirm who they were, the time limit drew closer at last.

All of a sudden, I remembered Ayano’s words, “Even when you want to say something, there are times when you won’t have the chance to.”

I really was an idiot. Even though I was just going to say something so simple, I’d taken too much time.

In my fading consciousness, until the very last moment, I continued to recite those words.

“——Haruka, I love you.”   

HEADPHONE ACTOR PART FOUR

(translated by Miss-Simplicity
)

I wonder if my last words reached. 
Although I had no way of making sure, surely, they had. I had that kind of feeling. 
It was a strange sensation. 
Like floating in warm water, or flying through the sky …. 
Yes, a sensation like waking up from something. 
My quickened breath, the pain in my legs that seemed like they would tear. Even the usual drowsiness that would irritate me …. Today, I didn’t feel anything at all. 
Had I died? 
Could this seemingly endless darkness be the afterlife ….? 
I had imagined it’d have a bit more of a fairy tale-like feeling, but unexpectedly, it seemed like even God slacked off sometimes. 
At the very least, I wish He’d made a bit of light …. 
"Sigh, somehow I just don’t understand this at all ….. Huh? Ah! Ah~! Ah~! …. I can speak. U~hm …. hm~ My body …. is here, too." 
Patting my own body all over, it was evident from my voice and body that I was properly conscious.  
"Then, I wonder what this place is. It doesn’t feel like I’m trapped somewhere, either ….. I wonder if I what I saw just now was some weird dream …." 
All of a sudden, the memory of my horrific experience from earlier came flooding back. 
The town of agonizing cries. 
The crumbling sky. 
The voice of another “me” that I suddenly heard ….. 
Just remembering it gave me goosebumps. 
And from “getting goosebumps,” I realized something. 
How had it become something this strange in the first place? 
Although I could speak, I couldn’t feel myself breathing. 
Although I could touch my body, I couldn’t feel a temperature. 
If this was what being “dead” was like, I probably had to come to terms with it, but no matter what, I couldn’t understand it. 
That time, before I’d woken up in the hallway, what in the world had happened to my body? 
I’d experienced this sensation several times before. 
The sensation of “waking up after suddenly falling asleep.” 
In actuality, my memories from before I woke up in that hallway were completely missing. 
It was probably because I’d fainted because of my “illness,” and woken up there. 
That was something that had happened many times before, so it wasn’t such a big surprise …. but this time, the situation in which I woke up was different. 
Up until now, I’d never been engulfed by this dream-like phenomenon, wandering around in the darkness. 
"Nn~!! I don’t get it!! Just what is this place!? Someone!?! Is there anyone here~!?!" 
The moment I shouted this, although I didn’t know if it was an opportunity or anything—suddenly, something like a square television screen emerged from the darkness. 
In it, there were an infinite number of monitors, and cables that seemed to be alive, running from the ceiling. 
"U-uwaah! That scared me … What is this? …. TV?" 
When I looked at it up close, I saw that it was a dark, laboratory-like room. 
Each monitor displayed some kind of parameter or time. 
The square frame that I was peeking out of into this room, was probably of the the monitors in here. 
But I had no way to confirm that. 
The surroundings were completely dark. Looking out at this room from this square, window-like sceen right now, was my only way to find out about anything. 
Nevertheless, just what was that world? At that time, I was struck by the sensation that the world that had I spent my time in had crumbled like paper mache. 
Even the reason I became desperate to tell someone something, in the end, I didn’t understand it very well. 
"Nn~ …. It’s dark, so I can’t see very well, but …. Someone’s talking?" 
Because the room was illuminated only from the glow of the display screens, what I could see was limited. 
However, from this square window, although it was faint, I was able to catch some sound. 
"…. —ys 1 is a success for now. Ha ha …. To think that it would go well on the first attempt. It was worth taking a year to prepare."  
While holding my ears attentive, the voice that I heard was of a person I knew very well. 
"…. Sensei? Why is he in this kind of place …." 
When I thought to somehow confirm the owner of that voice, the position of the square window changed. 
Although only slightly, the sound volume increased, and I was able to hear clearly. 
The dim room, too, as if my eyes had grown accustomed to it, gradually became brighter. 
However, what I saw there, was an unbelievable scene. 
In the back of the dark room that I couldn’t see well, there were large X-ray machines spread out. 
Above the bed portion, there was a white circular gate installed. 
There was something like a heart rate monitor with an unmoving needle, and a few buttons. 
The multiple cords extending from the gate, were attached to every part of the body lying on the bed, as if to connect it to something. 
"That’s ….. m-me …..!?" 
The human was clearly me. She was wearing something like white hospital clothes, and on her head, some kind of machine that looked like headphones. 
"Wh-what does this mean!? But I’m—even though I’m right here ….!" 
Just then, I gasped. 
Could it possibly mean that I’d “become a ghost”? 
That fact was that my consciousness was here, but my body was unmistakably lying on that bed. 
Which would mean …. 
"Could it be, that I really died ….? Seriously ….?" 
I was petrified with terror at this much-too-shocking sight. 
And although it was useless, I realized here that “I could be petrified with terror.” 
To think that I, myself, had become one of the “ghosts” that I refused to believe in. 
That girl that came to the school culture festival might have actually been a real ghost, then. 
No, didn’t that boy say it was a supernatural power? 
No matter which one, both were paranormal phenomenon that I wasn’t convinced of. 
But surprisingly, I retained a presence of mind. 
I had died, but I hadn’t ceased existing. 
Thinking clearly about it in this way, I could recognize things, and there was no denying that I was existed here. 
"…. But what should I do from now? Earlier, I heard Sensei’s voice, so he must be here somewhere, but isn’t there some way to get his attention and have him help me …?" 
Once again, I began to restlessly observe the inside of the room. Although I think what I heard earlier was more to the right …. 
Taking note of this, I pressed by face against the square screen and looked to the right as much as I could. 
When I did, in the back of the room, there was something I hadn’t been able to see because it had been in a blind spot, but could now see clearly. 
There was a huge aquarium … no, some kind of huge container filled with formalin, and standing in front of it was Sensei’s figure. However, rather than the figure of Sensei, who I had been searching for, I was more shocked by the figure of a human inside of that container. 
"Ha-Haruka ….!?" 
For a moment, I thought it was Haruka, but the appearance was different from the Haruka that I knew.
Like me who was on top of the bed, with tubes connected to his body, floating underwater without looking up …. was a youth with white hair and pale pink-colored eyes. 
"Isn’t that the ‘Konoha’ that Haruka made ….? B-but why ….!?" 
As one thing led to another, in this unrealistic situation, I already couldn’t think properly. 
Why was I dead? 
Why was Konoha in there? 
And why was Sensei ….?

Unable to organize my thoughts, once again, I heard Sensei’s voice from the square window. 

"At any rate, I’ve acquired the "key." With this, the next ‘Heat-Haze Daze’ can be opened. Konoha …. you are still …." 
That was as far as I heard when a large sandstorm ran across the screen. 
Wondering what had happened and hitting my hand against the screen, a pale light projected from my hand’s silhouette, almost like block noise, and I saw my begin to collapse starting from the edge. 
"Eek— …..! U-uwaaaa!! Wh-what is this!? My body is ….!" 
The next moment, all the infinite screens on the other side of the square window displayed the word, “DELETE.” 
"De … derete!? ….. Teheh
☆
"
 

Just as instructed, thinking it could be nothing other than this, I did my best to try and be dere. 
——However, the situation didn’t change in the slightest. 
Then what was it, that instruction just now ….!? 
"Gyaaaa!! Nothing happened!! Aaaah, my legs are disappearing …..!! M-my chest is …. well, I never had one to start with, though …." 
It was like I was in a dream, with my body disappearing. 
I didn’t understand this at all anymore. 
This probably meant I was going to disappear. There was no mistake. 
When I opened my eyes, I probably wouldn’t be at home in bed, on the verge of being late. …. No, I probably wouldn’t. 
While thinking of such a stupid thing, my body was already on the verge of completely disappearing. 
Helpless, I muttered, “God!” but in the moment after that vain effort— 
It become completely dark. 
"…. How pitiful, little girl. You have lost your body, what meaning do you have to survive now?" 
Aah, so I really had lost my body …. that was just what I’d thought. 
"A place to return to, or even a place to stay, you don’t have anywhere." 
If that’s the case, then … then I’ll make one. No matter what kind of place it is, I can just make it my place. 
"A rather arrogant girl, aren’t you? Before you even attempt that, do you want to escape from here?" 
W-well of course! If I stay here, I won’t know what to do …. 
"…. If you want to escape, then open your ‘eyes’ ….. little girl." 
——Eh!? …. Anyway, who are you? 
The moment I thought to ask, my eyes suddenly became hot like they were burning. 
And at the same time, lighting bolts ran across the darkened world. 
The first thing that caught my eye, right in front of me——a log-in screen had appeared. 
To me, that was the most familiar scene. 
"——I see, so it’s like this. Then …. first, I have to find a place to stay. If possible, it’d be nice if it’s not a boring place." 
I typed my password into the log-in screen with a familiar speed. 
"WELCOME" 
With a completely refreshed feeling, I dove into the sea of character strings. 
The blue compass began to vigorously spin, and in the wide sky of 0 and 1’s, lightning birds flew about. 
——From here, my long, long, cyber journey began.