Hold on to your Dreams (18 page)

‘Mrs Jenkins!’ Alex called as he stormed along the passage. Where the devil was his housekeeper when he needed her?

‘Alexander!’ Lady Chester caught up with him, out of breath. ‘We have to greet the guests.’

‘You and your family do it, Lady Chester. It’s your function. Mrs Jenkins! Where the devil are you?’

‘Here, sir.’ She was running as fast as her ample size would allow.

The butler and footman had also arrived, alerted by their master’s raised voice.

‘I only want Mrs Jenkins, not the whole damned house!’ he growled, sending the men running for cover.

‘I’m here, so will you tell me what you want me to do, sir?’

‘Go to the library and take your workbox. Miss Melrose needs gold ribbon for the sleeve of her dress. She pulled it
out and gave it to May for her hair. Be quick. I won’t have her walking into the ballroom like that. And tell David Gardener to meet me in my private sitting room. Now!’

The butler had reappeared but was standing at a safe distance from his furious master. ‘You are expected in the ballroom, sir.’

‘I’ll get there when I’m good and ready!’ He spun on his heel and took the stairs three at a time.

The door of the library burst open and the housekeeper hurried in. ‘Mr Gardener, the master wants to see you in his sitting room at once.’

Glancing at the clock, he frowned. ‘What’s he doing there? The evening is about to get under way.’

‘I don’t know, sir, but he’s in a powerful rage. I wouldn’t waste any time if I were you.’ She put down her work basket and ran a hand over her hair. ‘And be careful. It’s rare for him to lose his temper, but when he does it’s best not to question his orders.’

David left the room at a run.

Gertrude watched in amazement, wondering what on earth was going on.

‘Now, Miss Melrose, I’ve been ordered to repair your dress.’

‘Oh, it doesn’t matter.’ She touched the sleeve. ‘No one will notice me.’

‘It will only take a moment. I have some ribbon. Not the same, but I can change it in both sleeves so they will match.’ The housekeeper began to work quickly, and the job was soon done.

‘There, that’s better.’ She stood back to study her work, and then pursed her lips. ‘The dress needs something at the neck.’

‘I don’t have anything. But I thought it looked all right.’

‘I think we can improve it. We need to bring attention to your graceful long neck.’ More ribbon was removed from the basket, plaited, and tied around Gertrude’s neck with a bow at the side.

‘That’s ever so pretty.’ Millie had been watching with great interest. ‘You’re clever, Mrs Jenkins.’

‘Thank you, Millie.’ She inspected her handiwork one more time, and nodded in satisfaction. ‘I just hope the master feels the same way or this household is in for a stormy couple of days.’

‘Has he really lost his temper?’ Fred looked as if he couldn’t believe it.

‘I’m afraid so.’

‘But he was all right when he was here,’ he pointed out. ‘He was laughing and joking.’

‘Well he isn’t now. Something has upset him.’

‘Hmm, wonder what it was.’ Fred pulled a face at Millie.

‘You wanted to see me?’ David stopped just inside the door. Alex was pacing the room, and did not look at all like the controlled man he’d come to know.

‘She isn’t wearing any jewellery.’ His voice resonated with anger.

‘Pardon?’

‘Why is Gertrude wearing an old gown and not one item of jewellery?’

‘The gown isn’t old. I believe it’s only been worn twice.’ David wished Alex would stand still. It was unnerving. ‘And she hasn’t any jewellery left.’

‘What about her mother?’

‘It’s all been sold to pay the medical bills.’

The language that poured forth from him was astounding.

‘Alex! What’s this all about?’

‘I told you to bring me anything she wanted to sell. I haven’t seen any since the first lot, and I assumed they were managing to keep hold of their jewels.’

‘Gertie dealt with the rest of the sales herself.’

‘And got less than it was worth!’ Alex’s fists clenched. ‘That girl’s too independent.’

‘I wouldn’t consider that a fault,’ David pointed out.

Alex took a deep breath as he tried to reign in his temper. ‘No, you’re right.’

Relieved to see he was calming down at last, he said nothing more, as a package was handed to him.

‘Give this to her.’

David knew what it was, and at the risk of making Alex erupt again, he shook his head and placed it back on the table. ‘I can’t.’

‘I’ll bloody well do it myself!’ He swept up the package and headed for the door.

‘Don’t!’

When Alex spun round to face him, David had to gather up every piece of courage he had to face down this powerful man. ‘She doesn’t know you’ve got any of her jewellery. You’ll insult her.’

‘That is not my intention. I only want her to have what is rightly hers.’

‘And if you do that you’ll take away what little pride she has left.’

‘Explain.’

‘Right from a toddler, she’s had to do things for herself.’ David smiled, remembering the happy times they’d spent together as children. ‘She would stand in front of Edward and myself, jumping up and down and saying – I’ll do it! I’ll do it.’

‘And your point is?’

‘All her life she’s been cocooned within a loving family, and although intelligent in a bookish way, she’s never been very worldly. Do you know what I mean?’

Alex nodded.

‘When this disaster struck her family she found herself in a world she’d never experienced before. She floundered, not knowing what to do. That’s why she ran to me seeking advice and help. The love she feels for her parents has kept her going, but as you know, she collapsed under the strain. This crisis has forced her to grow up quickly and face each challenge. She’s done that and knows what things are important and what is of no value.’ At least Alex was listening, and he had to make him understand. ‘Her mother is well enough to attend this function. The fact they have to wear last season’s gowns and are without jewels does not matter in the least. The Melrose family are happy tonight. Please don’t spoil that for them.’

The man in front of him walked back to his desk,
dropped the package back into the drawer, then went and stared out of the window, silent.

‘Gertie isn’t the same person. I’ve always adored her – now I also respect her.’

‘Thank you for explaining. I didn’t understand, and I couldn’t bear seeing her like that. She’s so lovely and should be dressed in the finest gowns. It made me angry.’

Something in his expression shocked David. The barriers were down and it was clear to see that Alex loved Gertie. It wasn’t merely affection; it was a deep and lasting love, and it had hurt him to see just how impoverished she now was. And if David was right, he was now committed to another woman.

The moment was brief, and then he was back to his usual self. ‘I’d better put in an appearance.’

As Alex strode out of the room David felt sad – for all of them. They were all going to lose.

‘Ah, there you are.’ Sutton caught him as he walked down the stairs. ‘Do you know where Gertie is? It’s time to present ourselves to our hosts.’

‘She’s in the library with Fred and Millie. I’m on my way to collect them.’

‘I might have known she’d be with the books,’ he laughed.

It was a good sound, and helped lift the gloom trying to settle on David. Laughter in the Melrose family had been sadly missing lately. The whole point of this evening was to get Florence back into the social scene, and they must do everything they could to make it a success.

Hearing more laughter, he glanced round and saw Gertie
and two very smart youngsters walking towards them.

‘My goodness!’ Sutton exclaimed. ‘You all look splendid.’

‘Thank you, sir.’ Fred bowed elegantly. ‘Surprising what a difference the right clothes can make, ain’t it?’

‘No one would know where we come from until we open our mouths.’ Millie smirked at the thought.

‘Gertrude, that looks so pretty.’ Florence joined them, leaning on the cane Fred had made for her. She never went anywhere without it now.

‘The housekeeper insisted on doing it for me, and I didn’t like to refuse.’

‘I should think not. It’s charming.’ Florence smiled at everyone. ‘Shall we go to the ballroom? I’m looking forward to seeing everyone again. And no hiding, Gertrude,’ she scolded.

‘No, Mother, I don’t do things like that now.’

The six of them linked arms with their partners and made their way to greet their hosts for the evening.

‘Did you find out what made Sir mad?’ Millie whispered in David’s ear as the walked along.

‘He’s got a problem.’

‘Big one, is it?’

‘Enormous. Hell, we’ve all got problems except you and Fred. Pardon my language, Millie, but it’s all rather a mess.’

‘Ah, I see.’ She gave him a knowing glance. ‘And you cuss all you want to. I’ve heard a lot worse.’

She probably did see, David thought wryly. He doubted much got past this bright girl.

The Chesters were greeting all the guests while Alex stayed in the background. It was their ball. He’d only offered the use of his home because of the large ballroom. It was time it was used again.

Glancing up at the balcony, he saw two little faces pressed against the bars, and hands fluttered acknowledging his smile.

When the Melrose family were announced, he turned his attention back to the entrance. He liked what he saw. Florence Melrose was frail now, but upright and smiling. The fact she wasn’t wearing any jewellery was not as noticeable as it had been on her daughter, because lace filled the neckline of her gown. When Gertrude stepped into view he saw the ribbon his housekeeper had arranged around her neck. It looked charming, and he made a mental note to thank Mrs Jenkins.

When the last of the guests had been welcomed, the band played the opening dance. Lord and Lady Chester took the floor first, followed by Alex and Miriam Chester. Then other couples joined in and the room was filled with music and laughter.

Much to her surprise, Gertrude was enjoying the evening. Fred and Millie had bought a book on different dances, and had obviously been learning how to do them. They were surprisingly good. It wasn’t possible to hold a conversation with Fred while they were dancing because he was too busy counting under his breath in order to keep time with the music. David was an excellent dancer and guided Millie expertly round the floor. Her cheeks were flushed with excitement.

‘Come and dance with me, Fred.’ Millie tugged him on to the dance floor. ‘I’m getting the hang of this now.’

They disappeared into the crowd and David held out his arm to Gertrude. They joined the dancers.

‘I’m so pleased we brought Fred and Millie along. They’re having a wonderful time.’

‘Yes, it’s good to see,’ he agreed. ‘They’ll be talking
about this for days. Alex thought it was a fine idea, and that’s why he’s included May and Johnny. He didn’t want to leave them out.’

‘He’s obviously fond of them, but I was surprised when he referred to them as his children.’ Gertrude laughed quietly. ‘Lady Chester was shocked.’

‘She was lucky to get away with just that.’ He pulled a face. ‘Everyone else got the sharp end of his tongue, and his language would have made the roughest soldier blush.’

‘As bad as that, was it?’ She wished she could have seen the big man explode. It would have really been something to remember.

‘Hmm.’

‘What on earth made him lose his temper like that?’

‘He never said,’ David lied.

‘Oh well, he appears to have got over it now.’ She knew her friend wasn’t going to say more. If he’d been told what the problem was he would never betray a confidence. ‘When do you think they’ll make the announcement?’

‘Just before the supper interval, I expect. And I hope that gentle girl knows what she’s getting into. He’s a lot more volatile than I realised, and I’m not sure she’s strong enough for him.’ He glanced down at her. ‘You would be, though. You’d fight back.’

‘Now,’ she scolded, ‘you know that isn’t going to happen. Accept it; I have.’

‘I know, but it hurts.’

‘Yes, it does, but many things in life are hard. We have to do the best we can, and enjoy the good times.’

‘You sound like Millie,’ he teased.

‘I’ll take that as a compliment. The last months have taught me a lot. It’s been a brutal way to learn what life is all about, but I’ve been forced to do it.’ She glanced up, a slight smile on her lips. ‘Aunt Hanna told me to grow up, and I have.’

‘Indeed you have.’ He squeezed her hand in affection. ‘And I’m proud of you.’

‘Just because we can’t always have what we want in life doesn’t mean we have to wallow in self-pity and give up our dreams. Fred and Millie would be ashamed of us if we did.’

‘And we can’t have that.’ The dance ended and he led her back to her parents.

Alex was there and talking to Florence. ‘… and you can be proud of your son, Mrs Melrose.’

‘I am.’ She smiled, her eyes shining. ‘He’s trying to make amends for his foolishness, and that shows he’s changed.’

‘It commands respect.’

Gertrude studied her mother’s happy face and sent out a silent thank you to the man talking to her. She had only caught part of the conversation, but he had clearly been saying all the right things.

As if catching her thoughts, he turned. ‘Will you dance with me, Gertrude?’

‘I’d be pleased to,’ she answered, without hesitation.

Before leading her on to the floor, he said to David, ‘Why don’t you ask Miriam to dance?’

‘I wasn’t sure if I should?’

‘Of course you should. And where’s Fred?’

‘Right behind you, sir.’

‘I shall expect you to dance with her, as well.’

‘You’re joking!’ His eyes opened wide.

‘I am not. You are my guests, and it is the polite thing to do. Millie, will you save the next dance for me?’

‘Of course, sir.’ She sketched a curtsy, making everyone laugh.

They joined the crush of dancers. ‘You haven’t run away from me this evening.’

It was time to be honest with him. She owed him that much. ‘I’m not afraid of you any more.’

‘Does that mean I’ve been forgiven?’

‘It means you haven’t done anything wrong. I’m the one who needs your forgiveness.’

‘Shall we forget what has happened in the past and start again – as friends?’

‘I’d like that.’

‘So would I.’ He smiled. ‘I believe your friends call you Gertie.’

She nodded.

‘I’m pleased to meet you, Gertie. My friends call me Alex.’

‘Hello Alex.’ She joined in the game. ‘You dance very well.’

‘So do you.’

They finished the dance in silence, both lost in their own thoughts. He was offering friendship, and she’d take it.

As they filed into supper, Gertrude and David frowned at each other, puzzled. There hadn’t been an announcement!

After the interval, Florence went and rested in the room provided for her. Sutton had wanted to take her home, but
she wouldn’t hear of it. All she needed was a short rest and then she would stay for another hour or so. She was enjoying herself far too much to leave so soon.

The music began again, and Gertrude danced with her father, David, and Fred. The youngsters were having such an exciting time it was impossible not to get swept up in their enjoyment.

‘I can’t understand why I disliked these occasions in the past,’ she told David.

‘I knew it was a good idea to bring Fred and Millie. We can’t be miserable around them.’

‘That’s true. I noticed you spent some time talking to Miriam and her parents before supper. Did you enjoy your dance with her?’

‘Of course, she’s a charming girl. Have you called a truce with Alex?’ he asked, changing the subject.

She nodded. ‘We’ve decided to be friends.’

‘That’s a good start,’ he murmured to himself.

She heard, and when she noticed hope flare in his eyes, she said, ‘I’ve always valued your friendship, and I’ll gratefully accept Alex’s. True friendship is a precious thing.’

‘I agree.’

‘They’re leaving it rather late to make the announcement,’ she said, noticing how much room there was on the dance floor now. ‘People are beginning to leave.’

‘Hmm.’ He glanced around. It was past midnight and the room was certainly less crowded. ‘They won’t do it now. I was positive this was the reason for the occasion, especially as it was being held in Alex’s house. It seems I was mistaken.’

‘Perhaps Miriam wants a less public way of announcing the engagement. She does appear to be rather shy.’

‘You’re right. It will be in the papers soon, I expect.’

The letters had taken a while to reach him, and Edward found a quiet spot away from the bustling camp. It wasn’t safe to venture too far on your own, but this was raised ground, and he had a good view all round.

He sat down, the three letters held tightly in his hand, almost afraid to open them. Lifting his head he watched the sun sinking slowly on the horizon, turning the sky vivid reds, oranges and gold. It was a breathtaking sight, and one he never got tired of seeing. If there wasn’t a war going on he could get to love this country. He couldn’t remember looking at the sky when he’d been in London. How he’d changed. He never referred to London as his home now. This was all he had, and here he’d found friendship and acceptance. He ran his fingers over the two stripes on his sleeve, sighing deeply. No one cared about his past, but the memory of what he’d done to the people who had loved him clouded his days and disturbed his nights. He’d been an arrogant fool! His father had tried hard to make him go into the business, and he’d made excuse after excuse. Why should he slave away in the workshop when he could be out enjoying himself? His selfish enjoyment had impoverished his family and cast him out. The shame was crushing. He could feel the excitement now as he’d held the cards in his hands. Didn’t matter about the losses, he’d win this time … He groaned in despair, knowing now what a fool he’d been,
but at the time, the only thing driving him had been the thrill of the game.

The light was beginning to fade, so he had to read the letters while he could still see enough. He recognised the writing on each letter and opened his sister’s first. There was no condemnation in it, only relief to know he was all right. She said nothing about the problems they were experiencing because of him. She sent her love and prayers for his safety.

The next was from his mother who assured him she was recovering from her illness. The rest of the letter was to tell him how proud she was of him, and that his award had been mentioned in the newspapers. The writing became shaky towards the end, showing how difficult it was for her to write. It did nothing to ease his distress.

The last one was from his father, and it took a while before he could bring himself to read it. It was brief and impersonal, stating that he would accept the money for a period of six months only. If he sent any after that it would be returned to him. The signature at the end was ‘Sutton Melrose’. That stabbed Edward like a sabre, but what did he expect? He was no longer his son, and it was useless to dream of forgiveness. He would never see them again. His grief was too heavy for tears.

‘Ed, what the devil are you doing up here alone? You could get shot, and believe me you don’t want that to happen! It hurts.’ Jack settled down beside him, keeping low. ‘Ah, been reading your letters from home.’

‘I haven’t got a home,’ he said bitterly. ‘I’ve been
disowned, and it’s only what I deserve.’ He’d never talked much about his past, but there seemed to be a special bond between them because of shared experiences.

‘I’m sorry, Ed. You want to talk about it? I’m a good listener.’

‘No, not now. Perhaps I’ll be able to tell you all about it one day.’

‘I understand.’ Jack pulled a letter out of his pocket. ‘Got one myself today, and my family said you’d be welcome at our house when we get back.’

‘That’s kind of them.’

‘Oh, they’re not a bad bunch. I’ve got eight brothers and sisters, and the house is crowded, so they don’t miss me too much. Now, let’s get off this hill. There’s something I want to talk to you about, and I’d rather do it without fear of a bullet whistling past my ear, or worse.’

There were men sitting around in groups, playing cards, or just talking. They found a spot where they could talk without being overheard, and sprawled on the ground.

‘What’s on your mind, Jack?’

‘When we’ve done our stint out here and get sent home, do you want to stay there?’

‘There’s nothing in London for me, and although the sergeant said I could make the army my career, I’m not sure I want to. To tell you the truth I’ve become quite fascinated by this country, and once the war’s over it could be a good place to settle.’

‘Exactly!’ Jack leant forward, his expression animated. ‘There’s a nice property about fifteen miles the other side of Ladysmith, and it’s going cheap.’

Edward sat up quickly. ‘How do you know?’

‘I found it last week when I was on patrol. The owner, Mr Botha, lost his wife recently and wants to go to stay with his daughter in London. With all the trouble out here he can’t sell the place. He’s in a hurry and will take any reasonable offer. I’d have bought it there and then if I’d had the money, and I was wondering if there’s a way we could buy it together.’

‘I like the idea, but most of my money is going to my father for the next six months.’

‘Me too.’ He sighed wistfully. ‘What we need is a partner with money. Got any ideas? I hate to let this chance slip by.’

‘Hmm.’ Edward frowned. ‘No one I know would advance me so much as a penny. I was a gambler and they wouldn’t trust me. I can only think of one man who might be interested in a deal like this. His reputation as a shrewd businessman is spotless. I could write to him, but it will take time for a reply to reach us.’

‘What makes you think he might help us?’

‘He wants to marry my sister – or at least, he did.’

‘In that case write to him!’ Jack was excited. ‘What have we got to lose? If we don’t try something we’ll lose this deal. I’ll take you to meet the owner and we can see if we can persuade him not to sell until we can find out if this man would be willing to help us.’

Scrambling to his feet, Edward smiled, feeling a surge of hope. Perhaps he had a future after all. ‘Come on, Jack, let’s get the letter written and on its way.’

It was four days later before they were able to see the land, and it took Edward’s breath away. It was quite isolated, but that didn’t worry either of them. ‘Where’s the boundary?’

Jack grinned. ‘It would take me a full day to show you. The main crop is mealies, a type of corn, and pumpkins. It’ll be hard work, but we could earn a decent living here.’

‘Let’s see if we can make a deal with Mr Botha.’ He almost ran back to the ramshackle house.

With little prospect of another buyer, the owner agreed to hold the sale for them.

Now all they could do was wait.