Hot Finish (5 page)

Ryder felt a rush of jealousy, which was so stupid he didn’t even want to acknowledge that’s what it was. But when his ex-wife, excuse me, wife, laughed and smiled back, there was no denying those ugly feelings.

“I’ll have a whiskey,” he told the bartender. “And leave
our
tab open.”

Suzanne gave him a funny look, but the idiot behind the counter got the message. “No problem,” he said, running his eyes over Ryder like he found him lacking.

“You better be paying,” Suzanne said to him.

“Don’t insult me, Suz.” She had changed her clothes, exchanging the skirt for a pair of jeans and some short black boots. Ryder liked the softness of the jeans, the casual way her knees fell slightly open. “When have I ever been a cheapskate?”

She nudged his leg with hers. “You got me there. You were always generous, still are. Except for the granite countertops in the motor home. Do you remember how much shit you gave me over that?”

“They were expensive! It seemed stupid for just our RV. I know I’m in it every weekend, but those countertops cost as much as a used car.”

“We didn’t need a used car. We needed granite countertops. And I bet they still look fabulous.”

The bartender placed his whiskey down in front of him and Ryder took a sip before giving her a smile. “They do. But I open my beer bottles on them. Does that piss you off?”

She laughed. “Of course you do, and of course it pisses me off.” But she didn’t sound remotely angry as she picked up her martini and drained half of it, then sighed.

“Damn, you thirsty? I’m going to end up driving you back home if you down them like that.”

“I guess I could think of worse things.”

They sat in companionable silence for a few seconds, and Ryder felt his muscles relaxing. It was nice just to hang out with her, to feel comfortable. Maybe he shouldn’t go there, wreck the few moments of peace between them, but there was something he’d been curious about for a long time. “Hey, Suz, I always wanted to ask you, why didn’t you change your name back to your maiden name?”

She shrugged. “Too much paperwork.”

He’d figured it had to be something as simple as that, and not anything to do with nostalgia. That really wasn’t Suz, but it still deflated him a little. “Well, I can understand that. You know how I am with paperwork.”

She laughed. “Oh, trust me, I know how you are with paperwork. Besides, it was a good name to have doing my work for the foundation . . . Everyone associated with racing in any way knows who you are, of course.” Then she shot him a grin. “And you know what my maiden name was. Did you honestly think I was dying to return to being Suzanne Hickey?”

Ryder was so used to thinking of her with his name, sometimes he forgot what her maiden name had been. He laughed. “When you put it like that . . . I guess I never thought about the fact that it’s not that enviable of a name.”

Suzanne slapped her glass back down on the bar, causing it to splash, and gave him an incredulous look. “Are you kidding me? You teased me about it mercilessly the very first night we met! You’re lucky I thought you were hot or I would have clocked you.”

“You thought I was hot?” he asked, liking the sound of that.

She rolled her eyes. “Duh. You knew that.”

“All I remember knowing is that you were the prettiest woman at that wedding and I would have used any stupid line or excuse to talk to you. I guess I wasn’t very smooth if I made fun of your name.” He honestly didn’t remember a damn word he’d said to her. What he remembered was turning around at his cousin Brian’s wedding and seeing Suzanne talking to the bride at the back of the church.

She had been wearing a soft floral dress, her hair loosely pulled up, a smile on her beautiful face, her tan legs a million miles long. Ryder hadn’t realized she’d been the wedding planner; he had thought she was a friend or a relative of the bride. She could have been the queen of England, for all he cared, his only thoughts were how to find out if she was married and if not, finding an opportunity to talk to her.

“Yeah, I thought you were hot,” she said softly, staring down into her martini glass.

“I thought you were beautiful. I still do.” Knowing she would probably protest if he delved too deeply into the present, he kept talking. “I must have asked about ten people who you were and if you were married. I think they were starting to whisper I was some kind of stalker.”

“I’m glad you did,” she said simply, glancing over at him, her brown eyes wide and open, her expression tender instead of sarcastic or closed.

Ryder felt emotion revving in him like his car engine pre-race. He was pushing his luck, he knew it. One more second and she would probably turn on him, but he couldn’t stop himself. “So you don’t regret meeting me?”

“Of course not, you idiot.”

Ryder grinned as she made a face and turned to the bartender. “This is a little sweet, can I have another splash of vodka, please?”

“I don’t regret it, either,” Ryder told her. “Not one minute of it.”

Okay, maybe he could do without some of their knockdown, drag-out fights, but hell, he had been happy married to her. “What did you do with your wedding ring?” he asked, taking a sip of his whiskey. “I kept mine, you know. I couldn’t part with it.”

“You’re really asking for it tonight, aren’t you?” she asked, moving restlessly on her stool. “This is what I get for being nice and picking your ass up?”

“You get what—compliments? That’s not such a bad deal, is it?” Ryder moved closer to her, letting his leg rest against hers, his arms leaning on the bar in front of her, so that he was only a few inches from her face. “You really are an amazing woman.”

“How long have you been drinking today?” she asked, wetting her lips nervously.

“I’m sober.” He was. That subzero wind had iced any beer buzz in his veins he had been feeling and he’d only had about three small sips of his whiskey. “I guess that letter from the lawyer has me thinking, that’s all.”

“The past is the past.”

He didn’t say anything, just stared at her, thinking that he would give just about anything to feel his lips on hers, to taste her sweet, moist tongue, and wrap her in his arms again.

Her breath had quickened, like she realized the direction his thoughts were taking. “I kept it, too,” she blurted. “My ring. It’s in my jewelry box, which is stupid, given what it’s worth. I should have it in a safe-deposit box or sell it, but I . . . can’t.”

That’s all he needed to hear. Ryder closed the distance between them and covered her mouth with his.

The very first touch had his body jolting and his soul sighing.

He was the stupidest man alive for ever letting this woman go.

So he deepened that kiss and waited for the slap.

But instead, Suzanne just opened her lips and slipped her tongue into his mouth.

No victory had ever been sweeter.

CHAPTER
FOUR

RYDER
had lost his ever-lovin’ mind.

Actually,
she
had lost her ever-lovin’ mind because while he had kissed her first, she was kissing right back.

She hadn’t meant to. She had thought to herself, when she’d recognized that look in his eye, that she should put her hand out, stop him, before he even got close enough to kiss her. But not only hadn’t she stopped him, the press of his lips on hers had felt so good she had opened her own mouth and was giving him back as good as she got.

Granted, it had been a long, less than stellar day, but that didn’t explain doing a tongue tango with her ex.

Or why it felt so damn good.

Suzanne felt her eyes drifting closed, her body shifting into his, her desire stirring to life from the center out. She’d been lying about him leaving her unsatisfied. In bed, he had always satisfied her. If he had satisfied her any more, he’d have likely killed her, and her girl bits clearly remembered him, because she was suddenly and achingly wet.

Her fingers had mysteriously worked their way into the back of his short hair, and she kept thinking that this was a bad idea, but kept doing the opposite of stopping.

It had been a long, long time since they had kissed, and it was amazing to feel that not a millimeter of their spark had disappeared. That same intense, hot, consuming passion still burned between them.

When Suzanne found herself reaching down between his legs to stroke his erection beneath his jeans, she suddenly remembered where exactly they were, and that she no longer had any right to touch wherever and whenever she wanted.

Jerking back, she stared at Ryder, who looked as stunned as she felt. He was breathing audibly, and he was gripping the edge of the bar like he’d float away without it anchoring him.

“Will you go home with me?” he asked without preamble. “I want you really bad, Suz.”

Not trusting her voice not to squeak, Suzanne just nodded. Her whole body felt like it had been dipped in melted wax, tight and hot and startled, and she was aware of every single nerve ending from scalp to toenail.

She’d barely finished her up and down nonverbal confirmation when he barked to the bartender, “Close our tab, please.”

Suzanne put her hand on her belly and concentrated on taking deep breaths as Ryder overpaid the bill and declined the offer to wait for change.

What the hell had just happened? She hadn’t even given one second’s thought to deliberating the pros or cons of having sex with her ex-husband. A few kisses, and she was ready to sheet dive.

Which scared the shit out of her.

So even as she stared at Ryder, thinking it was possible she would curl up into a ball and die if she didn’t get to feel his penis inside her in the next ten minutes, she was also thinking that the very second her body had been satisfied and he pulled out, regret was going to come crashing in on her like a flaming meteor.

It had been a while since she’d had sex, that was true. Her body would be very, very happy if she threw caution to the wind and let a man at her who knew all the right ways to please her.

But . . .

Ryder stood up. “Let’s go.”

Suzanne followed suit, grabbing her purse off the bar and slinging it on her shoulder. Damn, she was so outrageously aroused, even walking did funny things to her hoohah.

But . . .

“You can either ride with me or follow in your car,” Ryder said. “I’d love the company of having you in the truck with me, but truthfully, you probably shouldn’t leave your car here overnight. You should probably follow me.”

Overnight. Gak. Suzanne wasn’t sure what time it was, but it was still pre-primetime. And Ryder was already concluding she was spending the night. She gripped her purse tighter as they stopped in the parking lot in front of his truck.

“Suz?” Ryder studied her face and then sighed. “Hell, you’re not going to do either one, are you?”

“No.” She mentally slapped herself, hating what she had just done. “Shit, I’m sorry. It just seems like a really bad idea, but you know what I think of a dick tease, and I wasn’t trying to tease, honestly. I really meant yes when I said yes.”

“But now you mean no?”

Her inner thighs gave a whimper of protest, especially when she couldn’t stop herself from glancing down and seeing his erection straining against his jeans, but she nodded. “Yes, I mean no. I just think it’s a bad idea, especially when it’s so impulsive.”

“What if we plan it?” he asked, looking slightly hopeful.

Suzanne gave a soft laugh. “Nice try, Jefferson.” Feeling a lump crawling up her throat like a scurrying crab, she reached out and touched his hair, running her fingers through the short dark strands. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?”

A cool mask had slid back into place on his face. “Sure, babe. But if you get lonely before then, you know how to reach me.”

For the second time that day he turned his back on her.

And both times she had pretty much given him no choice.

RYDER
stared at his computer screen blankly. He couldn’t even process the words in front of him, he was so distracted by thoughts of Suzanne.

That kiss.

It had lit a fire in him that was still smoldering and he was really damn annoyed by that fact. He only had a few weeks off before the new season started up and he didn’t want to spend it with his hand.

Next season promised to be brutal and challenging, given that he had finished a heartbreaking second place in the race for the cup this season. He would be damned if he didn’t win next year, and he wasn’t about to let Suzanne distract him from the time he needed to relax and regroup before the hard work commenced.

But he couldn’t help it.

His thoughts were stuck on her and the way she had opened her mouth and pressed inside him with passion and enthusiasm. When they had been together, that’s the way it had always been, but it had been two years since he’d kissed Suzanne. To be honest, he had expected her to stop him. Smack him. Act indignant and huffy. Tell him to take his tongue to the nearest bimbo, or something similar.

Not to kiss him back.

He had been so shocked, he had actually paused for a split second before recovering and kissing her back with everything in him.

Man, he wanted to make love to her again. Just one last time.

He could remember the last time they’d had sex, and it had been a stilted, angry affair, not the way he would have wished their last time to be. But he hadn’t known that was it. He had still been fooling himself that they could work things out.

He wanted to do it right, to hold Suzanne in his arms with all the good memories intact and the bad tossed. To lay her down and give her pleasure. To bury himself inside her, and feel that connection again, just one more time.

But he wasn’t going to beg, and she had changed her mind, leaving him feeling like a jackass.

Ryder abruptly turned off his computer without even shutting down the browser. He just flicked the off switch, annoyed with himself. What had he expected? It had been something of a mystery why Suz had even kissed him. She wasn’t going to have sex with him.

Frankly, she didn’t even like him all that much most days, and she probably had men crawling all over her. Why the hell would she need him to get her off?

Just thinking about giving her an orgasm had Ryder groaning out loud. His erection throbbed like he was fourteen and had stumbled across a
Playboy
. He stomped away from his desk and toward his bedroom. He was going to sleep, and he was not going to do a damn thing about his prize boner, no matter how much it was demanding attention.

Sullen masturbation was not his style.

Laying in bed staring at the ceiling and feeling sorry for himself was much more his style.

Feeling like a total dumb ass, Ryder stripped down to his briefs and slid underneath his sheets, feeling so surly he consciously skipped brushing his teeth, something he never, ever did. Bad breath would teach her.

He should have kissed Suzanne again in the parking lot. At least tried to get her to come home with him. But as soon as she had changed her mind, he’d cut and run, like a big giant weenie.

Not that he wanted to think about that particular word. Flipping onto his side, he punched his pillow.

He could have tried to coax her all he wanted. If she had changed her mind, she’d changed her mind. Suzanne was never coaxed into anything.

So it had been stupid to kiss her in the first place.

Yet he didn’t regret it.

He regretted that she wasn’t naked on top of him at the moment, but he didn’t regret the kiss.

Which made him one hell of a glutton for punishment.

SUZANNE
lay in bed, completely unable to sleep, condemning herself as the biggest damn fool ever to reside in the state of North Carolina.

She could be playing cowgirl over at Ryder’s instead of wearing fuzzy pajama pants and wishing her sheets were a little more aggressive in caressing her. Why the hell had she suddenly gotten some kind of conscience and sent him home alone?

So it would make their relationship complicated the morning after.

When wasn’t their relationship complicated?

Hell, they were still married, and that was pretty damn complicated in its own right. What difference did having sex make?

Which even to her own ears was pretty shitty rationalization, but she was willing to go with it when she was feeling this desperate.

She was edgy, unable to sleep, aching with want, wet with desire. Still. Two hours later and she was still damp, which was pathetic.

Damn if she would be pathetic.

Suzanne threw back her covers and sat up.

Ryder wanted to have sex.

She wanted to have sex.

Why shouldn’t they have sex?

He had told her she knew where to find him if she changed her mind. That was a clear invitation to seek him out if she wanted to pick up where they’d left off with that seriously kick-ass kiss. Plus for the last two years she’d been fending off sexual innuendoes from him. She didn’t doubt for a minute he would be on board with her changing her mind yet again.

Ryder would probably give her shit about it, but only after the fact. She could live with that if she could get multiple orgasms out of the deal. And she would make it clear this was just a onetime event.

As Suzanne pulled on a pair of jeans, she tried to ignore the voice in her head telling her this was a flat-out dumb idea. She figured if she didn’t go over to Ryder’s she’d never get any sleep, and with Nikki as a client, she was going to need all the sleep and patience she could muster for the next month.

And if she felt a little bit stupid, she wasn’t going to admit it. She was a woman who went after what she wanted, and she wanted Ryder tonight. Plain and simple.

She got halfway there before she regained control of her senses and realized this was setting herself up for disastrous consequences. Showing up in the middle of the night to have sex with her ex who really wasn’t her ex was opening up a Texas-sized can of worms.

Smacking her hands on the steering wheel and letting out a groan of frustration, Suzanne glanced right to see if she could pull into the shopping complex and turn again. The man in the car next to her was staring at her like her boobs were on her back instead of her front.

“What?” she asked him out loud, even though he obviously couldn’t hear her.

Nothing,
he mouthed, shaking his head rapidly.

The man acted like he’d never seen a sexually frustrated woman in his whole life, and judging from his slack jaw and vacant stare, Suzanne was guessing he’d seen plenty of them.

The light changed and she waited until he had pulled forward, then she changed lanes, whipped into the shopping center parking lot, and redirected her car to head back home.

Her big lonely bed was waiting for her.

Yay her.

Suzanne hit the steering wheel again and cursed Ryder from here to Talladega for kissing her.

Then she cursed herself for kissing him back.

RYDER
knew he was risking Suzanne being royally pissed at him, but then again, he pretty much risked that on a regular basis just by breathing.

He pulled into the parking lot of her condo complex at a quarter to twelve, noting her car was in its assigned spot. There was no doubt in his mind that she had intended them to have this conference call at separate locations, but after last night, after that kiss, after her rejection, he wanted to see her.

He knew why she’d changed her mind, and hell, she had probably been smart to do it, but he couldn’t help but think they had some seriously unfinished business. Maybe the long night spent tossing and turning in his empty bed had affected his brain cells, because normally he avoided poking the bear, but today, he wanted to look Suzanne in the eye and discuss the fact that he had kissed her and she had kissed him back.

When he rang her doorbell, she answered right away, and her face was pinched but resigned. “I meant for us to do this call at our own houses.”

“You never said that,” he pointed out, which was the truth.

“You knew what I meant.”

“Maybe. Maybe not. I’m not all that bright.” He gave her a smile.

She shifted, one hand still on the door like she might slam it shut in his face. She was wearing jeans again and a black sweater. A shiny belt buckle drew attention to her flat stomach and Ryder marveled again how much he was attracted to her still. It seemed like at some point he should have stopped thinking of her as the hottest woman to grace the planet, but he hadn’t.

“Well, that’s true,” she said, but she tempered the words with a smile of her own. “You certainly don’t have any sense of self-preservation.”

“I’m a race car driver. I like to take risks.”

“What you’re risking is becoming a serious pain in the butt.” But she moved out of the way. “Since you’re here, come in, and let’s get this taken care of.”

“Such warmth, such enthusiasm.” Ryder followed her into the house. Her dining room table was still covered with bridal magazines and her computer was open to a picture of something that was either a wedding gown or a tablecloth, he wasn’t sure which. Seeing the grease stain from the pizza still glaring up at him on the carpet, Ryder felt guilty.