How to Rope a Real Man (21 page)

Chauffeuring the bubbies was uneventful. They were delighted that Tommy laughed at all their jokes, and he was delighted when Bubbie Roenick produced a peppermint candy from her purse. There were a couple other kids at the temple’s playground and Matt moved off to the sidelines with the other kids’ dad, like it was the most natural thing in the world to stand there with other parents and watch their kids play. Matt was in heaven.

After packing a picnic back on the ranch, Matt and Tommy drove the mile road to the stables near his parents’ house to select the horses they’d take on their ride. Though Matt had woken up early from his excitement about their picnic, Tommy was decidedly more jazzed about visiting Mrs. Carrots and her kittens.

They were grooming Hershey and Toby when Matt’s mom popped her head in, waving a bag full of cookies. “Hi there. I brought you a fresh supply of snickerdoodles since I heard all about Tommy’s sweet tooth. Is it just you boys today?”

“Yes, Jenna had to go to Albuquerque.”

Tommy brushed Toby’s flank with erratic circles. “My mom’s going to school. She doesn’t think I know, but I figured it out.”

Mom grinned, amused. “You’re pretty smart like that.”

Puffing out his chest, Tommy shrugged. “Not really. She has books all over the living room and sometimes I open my door and lay in bed and listen to her talking about school with her friends. She doesn’t ever mention it, so I don’t think she wants me to know. Don’t get me in trouble, okay?”

“You don’t have to worry about that. Your secret’s safe with us,” Matt said.

The night before, Jenna had agreed with Matt that it was time to tell Tommy a modified version of the truth about her schooling. His little mind didn’t need to know all the details or that Jenna had been working toward her degree for four years. Someday, Matt would make sure Tommy understood how hard his mom had worked to give him a good life and follow her dreams, but for now, all he needed to know was that she was going to school and when she finished next month, they were having a big celebration.

He could tell that, for Jenna, the idea of telling Tommy even that much was scary for her. She’d kept the secret for so long, it was hard to get out of that mentality, he supposed. She’d committed to talking to Tommy about it on Thursday, since Wednesday was busy from morning until Tommy’s bedtime.

“School?” Mom asked.

“We can talk about it later.” Behind Tommy’s head, he gestured to his ears, then pointed to Tommy, hoping to convey that there was more to the story that Little Big Ears didn’t need to know.

Mom nodded her understanding. “She’ll be back in time for us all to have dinner together tonight, I hope? I’m making my famous bleu cheese burgers.”

Score. “Yeah, she should be back before six. I love those burgers. Good call.”

“It was your father’s idea. So what are you two gentlemen up to today?”

“We’re taking Hershey and Toby on a ride through Aldra Valley to my super secret picnic spot.”

“Sounds like a great way to spend the afternoon. Don’t forget sunscreen.”

“We didn’t,” Tommy chimed in. “But I wish Mrs. Carrots and her babies could come with us.”

“It’s not safe out in the big, wide world for her little ones yet. There are a lot of scary predators out there for tiny, defenseless kittens.”

“That’s what a mommy cat is for. She’s their defense shield,” Tommy said in a matter-of-fact tone. “If they had a daddy cat, they’d be even safer.”

Mom’s expression lengthened. “Matt, could I speak to you in private for a minute?” When she got that tone, every one of her kids, grandkids, and employees knew a lecture was coming. Matt was so sick and tired of being given a talking-to like he was still a kid. His mom’s eternal baby boy, without a family of his own. The accident hadn’t helped him escape that image, either, setting back any strides toward independence he’d made in college. He’d had to regress by necessity, counting on his parents for help bathing and feeding himself. He hadn’t been able to drive for months. After that, the dark place that the news of his infertility had catapulted him into only made the situation worse.

He followed Mom out of the stable and around the corner. “Mom, please don’t spoil my good day.”

“That’s not fair. What makes you think I was going to do that?”

Matt sucked his cheeks in and counted to ten silently. “Sorry. What’s up?”

“I know you’re happy to have Jenna and her son here—your father and I like them a lot—but don’t you think this is too fast? You’re basing your decision on your legal clinic location on your girlfriend of the moment.”

Matt ground his molars together, shaking his head. Wow. Girlfriend of the moment. How could Mom think that? He’d phoned his parents that morning to share the good news that he’d put in an offer on the storefront in downtown Santa Fe the day before, and here she was throwing the news back in his face. “You said you weren’t going to spoil my day.”

She pressed her lips into a thin line. “Your father and I worry about you. You can’t fault us for that.”

“I know. And I love you for it, but it’s gotten to the point where I feel like I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t in your eyes. Jenna’s not my girlfriend of the moment, so please don’t talk about her like that. And if I want to make a choice to build a business in the city I was born and raised in, I don’t think you need to criticize that, despite the assumptions you’re making about my motivation.”

She wrung her hands together. “Matty, you’ve gone through so much and been hurt so many times. Watching you . . .” She shook her head. “It’s hard, son. That’s all. It’s hard to watch and be powerless to help your baby with what he’s going through.”

He bet it was. It still didn’t give her and Dad the right to hand over judgment of him all the damn time. Despite the lawyer part of him pushing him to keep battling until he won the argument, he knew deep down that there was no sense driving himself crazy trying to persuade his parents to change their mind-set.

Only time would prove to them that he could manage his own life just fine. Eventually, they’d figure out that his relationship with Jenna wasn’t a passing fancy and nothing he could say would speed up their acceptance of that.

The shitty thing was a part of him still agreed with his mom. He was rushing into things with Jenna. And, yes, he did have a history of being hurt—badly. After all the heartache he’d been through, he couldn’t escape the nagging fear that all he and Jenna had done was build a house of cards. Because the truth was that he hadn’t been bold enough to tuck Tommy into bed either Monday or Tuesday. When it came right down to it, he didn’t need his parents introducing any more insecurity into his mind—he was doing a bang-up job of that all on his own.

“I know, Mom. It’s okay. Thank you for caring about me so much. I love you. Tommy and I need to get on our picnic. We’ll be at your house at six tonight for dinner.”

The trail was wide enough that Matt and Tommy were able to ride side-by-side as they descended into the valley. The sun was shining bright and hot, a smattering of white clouds dotted the sky, and Tommy was in a fantastic, chatty mood. Still, Matt stewed. He couldn’t stop thinking about his conversation with his mom, considering that maybe she had a valid point about him rushing into things with Jenna and Tommy too fast.

“Was that your mommy?” Tommy asked.

“Sure was. And you met my dad the day you got here. He was the old guy with the big ears and black cowboy hat. Remember?”

“He was nice. I’m like one of Mrs. Carrots’s kittens,” Tommy announced.

“How do you figure?”

“They don’t have a dad either.”

Matt’s mouth went dry.
Keep it cool, man.
“How do you feel about that?”

Tommy fiddled with the rein, looping it around his middle finger. “Daisy’s dad takes her camping. They make s’mores.”

Fair enough. It wasn’t like he’d expected a heartfelt speech from the little guy about the lack of a father figure in his life. “Have you ever been camping?”

“No. My mommy says we’ll go someday, but she doesn’t know when. She’s really busy.”

I would take you. I’d take you all the time, as much as you wanted. We would roast s’mores and fish and shoot targets with BB guns and tramp all over the countryside.
“You’re right.” He cleared his throat. “She’s really busy, and that’s why you and I have such important jobs.”

Tommy looked his way, squinting at the glare of the sun. “What jobs?”

“Keeping her happy. That’s what a man’s job is, you know. Keep the women in his life happy.”

Tommy screwed his mouth up, thinking, then his whole face crinkled in a cringe. “Does that mean I have to eat broccoli now?”

Matt chuckled. How could he not? The kid was adorable. If he’d been Matt’s kid, he would’ve gathered him into a bear hug and made some sort of secret rewards deal for eating his veggies without complaint.

Panic struck his heart like lightning. His parents were right. He was rushing things with Jenna and if things went south now, it would be the worst heartbreak of his life to lose her and Tommy. He wanted to be Tommy’s dad so badly it stole his breath clean out of his lungs. He and Jenna were so very new and new meant fragile. Shit. What had he done? He felt like a man on a high-wire with no safety net below him.

Heart pounding, he kept his fingers laced tight over the horn of his saddle and broadened his smile. “Aw, now, how can you think like that? Broccoli’s delicious. I bet your mom makes it real good.”

Tommy sighed and melted over his saddle, exasperated as only a kid could be. “Okay, fine. I’ll eat broccoli, but no asparagus. Bleh.” They rode in silence while Matt talked himself down from the panic attack.

After a few minutes, Tommy added, “You could be my dad, you know. If you wanted.”

Matt’s chest tightened painfully again. Yeah, he wanted.

Above them, the clouds stretched and morphed. The long grass rustled in the wind and the trees grew denser as they descended into the valley. He had to choose his response carefully. For all he knew, he was the first man Tommy had ever voiced that invitation to. Not something a man could take lightly.
It’s not up to me
would make Jenna the bad guy if things didn’t work out.
We’ll see
was glib and didn’t address that tagged-on qualifier Tommy had added.
That would be great
might inflate his expectations.

He wiped sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand and released a slow exhale. He refused to let fear rule his life any longer. He refused to be cynical like that Lynch guy at the wedding even if it meant sticking his neck out with nothing but a prayer to guard against it getting cut off.

“Thank you,” he said. “I don’t think I’ve ever gotten a better offer than that. You are one special kid, that’s for sure. The tricky part is that your mom and I don’t know what’s going to happen in the future; there are a lot of grown-up choices we have to make that aren’t easy. But I’ll make you a promise. When I figure out what’s going to happen, I’ll tell you right away, okay?”

He held still and silent, awaiting Tommy’s reaction.

Tommy scratched his cheek. “What about s’mores?”

Matt’s breath came out in a huff of anxious laughter. “You sure are single-minded about sweets, buddy.”

“I know,” Tommy replied heavily, like that was his burden to bear.

“I’ll see what I can do about the s’mores situation. Maybe tonight we can rustle up some supplies after dinner, if it’s okay with your mom.” After a second’s hesitation to let the panic pass through him, he threw his arm around Tommy and gave him a giant, one-arm hug and a kiss on the hair. “Have you ever sung ‘The Cowboy Lullaby’?”

“Aren’t lullabies for babies when they’re going to bed?”

“You’re right about lullabies being sung before bed. But my nieces and nephews are older than babies and they still love me to sing them ‘The Cowboy Lullaby’ when they stay the night at my house. I figured you and I could practice right now so you’ll be prepared tonight. We can sing it to your mom when we tuck you in tonight.”

“Does it have a horse in it?”

“And boots and spurs, too. It’s a real cowboy song from back in my great-great-grandfather’s pioneer days. It starts out like this.” He took another fortifying breath, smiled at the little boy who was hanging on his every word, and started to sing. “
When the prairie moon shines in the prairie sky, that’s when cowboys sing a lullaby . . .”

The best, most logical way to stay on the pulse of Catcher Creek gossip was not by grabbing a beer at Smithy’s Bar, as many of the men in town claimed. They could have their delusions about saving the world one brew and bowl of pretzels at a time, but football scores and steer prices didn’t delve into the heart of the town or the people in it. If one wanted to be privy to the private matters that happened behind the closed front doors of the homes and ranches scattered over the Quay County countryside, then you had to devote the fourth Thursday of every month to Bunco.

At its heart, Bunco was a big ol’ excuse for ladies to get together and dish on friends, family, and neighbors wrapped in the guise of a dice game with rotating tables of players. Jenna was the youngest player by several years, but she’d signed up with the Bunco powers-that-be the week after her twenty-first birthday and had been one of the town’s most devoted participants ever since. She enjoyed the occasional win and getting out of the house away from her schoolwork. And she loved the gossip.

Sure, Jenna had a reputation as a gossiper around town, but not with secrets of any grave importance. She liked to know the private business of people, but nothing harmful, just tidbits about who’d been seen playing grab-ass at church or who was sporting a gaudy new hair color. Indulging in secrets like that hurt no one. It was no different from watching a celebrity gossip show on TV.

Though she was having the time of her life with Matt in Santa Fe, there was information she couldn’t get any other way but to return to Catcher Creek in time for Bunco. Information like, what was Carson waiting for with his vengeance plot? Had he contacted his family yet, and to what end? What were his plans for Bucky, Lance, and Kyle’s families? She had a good feeling that tonight she was going to get the answers she needed, especially since Bunco was being hosted this month by none other than Patricia Parrish herself.

After dropping Tommy off with Rachel and Vaughn, she swung through the grocery store for a prepackaged platter of veggies and ranch and a bottle of wine, then headed to the Parrishes’ house on the east side of town.

What she hadn’t mentioned to Rachel was her plan to spend the night on the sofa in the big house, rather than in her cottage. She couldn’t take a chance on Carson cornering her alone again. Friday and Saturday night, Matt would be with her; then, on Sunday, she was leaving Catcher Creek in her dust once and for all. Jake would be leaving for his partner’s memorial service the next day, so Kellan’s dog would have to stay with Rachel because it was high time for Jenna to move on.

It was a solid plan, but also one that hinged on her getting Rachel alone to come clean about college and her move to Santa Fe, which terrified her to no end. She’d have to worry about that tomorrow. Tonight, navigating the Bunco minefield was going to take all her concentration.

The Parrish family owned a modest spread, with a pair of old horses under a lean-to and chickens running through the yard. Jenna pressed the doorbell, painted a smile on her face as the knob turned, and stepped into the fray.

“Why, Jenna, hello! Marti told us you’d be here. Don’t just stand in the doorway, come on in.” Patricia took the wine and veggie platter off her hands and ushered her into the room full of women standing amid the Bunco-prepped card tables.

“There she is,” Gayle Kopec said, wrapping a wineglass-holding arm around Jenna’s shoulders. “That was some wedding you threw last weekend. When my Kyle gets married, we’ll have to send his bride to talk to you for advice. Maybe you can lend her a hand, like a wedding planner would.”

Not if my life depended on it
, Jenna thought, offering Gayle her most saccharine smile. “I didn’t realize Kyle and Brenda were engaged.”

Patricia twittered by. “Not quite yet, but my cousin Madge saw him at a jeweler in Tucumcari buying a ring last week. We think he’s going to propose at the rodeo on Wednesday. I can’t wait to see my boy in action. Makes me so nervous to watch him on those bulls, but so proud at the same time, if you know what I mean.”

The rodeo. Of course. That was what Carson was waiting for. He wanted a big display and there wasn’t anything bigger or more well attended in Quay County than the annual rodeo. Bucky, Kyle, and Lance would all be there. The local boys’ heroic homecoming.

The thought gave Jenna chills. If Carson got his way, if he chose to levy eye-for-an-eye vengeance onto Kyle, would Kyle survive to propose to his girlfriend? If Carson came in with guns blazing, would he be arrested—or worse? Had he taken collateral damage and civilians into account when planning his attack of revenge? God, she hoped so. But with so much hatred in his heart, she doubted he was thinking clearly about the consequences of his actions. She made a mental note to lodge another anonymous call with the sheriff’s department to tip Vaughn off to the potential trouble.

The last player to arrive was Charlene Delgado, who, besides being Catcher Creek’s best babysitter, held the dubious unofficial title of the town’s number-one gossip maven. With Charlene present, the games got under way. Jenna found herself sitting across from Carson’s sister, Kate, and next to Patricia and Marti.

The sound of dice crashing onto the room’s tables did nothing to deter the conversations. Patricia tapped the score-keeping pencil on the table and squinted thoughtfully in Jenna’s direction. “Your sister Amy had some big news at the wedding. I’d make a smart comment about the bride wearing white except that I know I’m excessively old-fashioned about matters such as that.”

“Oh, now. Sinning women have been wearing white on their wedding days for centuries. It’s not like Amy Sorentino invented the cover-up,” Marti said.

“I think it’s romantic that Kellan announced it like that,” Kate added. “Did you see how in love he was? I didn’t think he had it in him to settle down until Amy came along. Now, I’ve never seen him so happy.”

“I’m happy for them,” Jenna said. “Kellan’s a good man, the best.”

“What about you?” Marti said. “The rumor going around is that you were kissing a man at the wedding reception. Wasn’t it you who told me that, Patricia?”

Patricia stiffened and rolled the dice, as though attempting to conceal that same disapproval she’d worn on her face after Jenna and Matt had kissed in the civic center lobby. “I only mentioned it because I didn’t recognize the man from town. He was in the wedding party, though, and I wanted to know if you knew who he was.”

“So who is he?” Marti pressed.

As much as Jenna loved learning other people’s secrets, she considered herself the most tight-lipped of the bunch. She’d learned after much practice that there was an art to making the women in town feel like she was sharing her personal business without actually revealing anything private. “His name is Matt Roenick and he’s friends with Kellan from way back.”

“Where’s he from?”

Jenna rolled the dice. Two ones. “Santa Fe. His parents breed horses.” That appeased the women. Horse breeding was a worthy occupation indeed. After scooping up the dice, she rolled again, got nothing of consequence, and passed the dice to Marti.

“Santa Fe is quite a haul from Catcher Creek. He must think you’re something special. Will you be bringing him to the rodeo?”

Jenna wouldn’t get within a hundred miles of the rodeo grounds, and she was going to make sure Rachel didn’t either. She gave a noncommittal smile and shrug as she passed the dice to Marti. Enough about her and Matt. She was wracking her brain for a change of topics when Marti spoke up.

“Speaking of out-of-towners, I’ve been seeing a black truck I don’t recognize parked in front of your house a few times this past week, Patti. Relatives visiting?” Marti asked.

Kate and Patricia froze, their eyes on each other. So they knew. Carson had been to see them, too. But to what end?

“Bunco!” Charlene hollered from the head table. Jenna startled and shot to her feet. Kate followed, along with two of the pairs of players who rose to switch tables. The volume of talking ramped up.

“Well?” Marti pressed. “Whose truck was that?”

“Yes, I meant to ask you about that earlier,” Gayle said, coming up next to Jenna to assume her old seat. “I saw that truck, too. In fact, you’ll never guess who I thought was behind the wheel when I saw it coming down Main Street.” She chuckled like she couldn’t believe how crazy the notion was. “It looked like Carson.”

Patricia blanched.

Gayle waved it off. “But I thought to myself, Patti would never keep something as big as Carson coming home a secret from her closest friends. Besides, it only looked like Carson in the face. This man was bigger, beefier. I figured he was one of your cousins’ kids since the family resemblance was so strong. So who was it?”

The conversation had caught the attention of everyone in the room. Kate averted her eyes. Jenna followed her line of sight to a photograph on the wall of Carson in full military dress.

Like a mallet whacking Jenna on the head, her hatred of the Parrish family crashed down on her. They were still covering his presence up. Like he didn’t exist. Like the shame of having him as their son rendered him invisible. As much as she hadn’t wanted Carson to return to Catcher Creek, a part of her was glad about it. He was going to make his family take notice. She could well imagine the type of violent public shaming he was planning for Wednesday night.

In the wake of Patricia’s silence and Kate’s obvious discomfort, Gayle’s face fell. “It’s true, isn’t it? That was Carson I saw. He’s home. Well, I never. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Now, Gayle, don’t be too hard on her,” Charlene said, “He’s been gone for, what, five years? No wonder she wanted to keep her boy to herself for a little while.”

“Six.” Patricia’s voice was strained. She cleared her throat before continuing. “He’s been gone for six. But he’s not staying with us. I don’t know where he’s been sleeping.”

“That doesn’t make any sense. Why wouldn’t he stay with you?” one of the other women in the room standing behind Jenna said.

Looks were shot in Jenna’s direction, like they thought perhaps Carson was staying with her. Jenna backed away from her chair. She didn’t think she could stand to play through until the Bunco game ended. Now that she was ruminating on how despicable the Parrish family was, how egregiously they’d wronged their son—if they hadn’t had a hand outright in his attempted murder—she felt like the walls of the Parrishes’ house were closing in on her.

“Jenna.” Gayle set a hand on Jenna’s arm. “You and Carson were best friends back in high school. Have you two gotten reacquainted since he’s been back?”

This was the woman whose son had nearly killed Carson. The woman who’d raised a bigot, probably because she was one herself. She jerked her arm away from Gayle’s touch and met Patricia’s searching gaze.

In the woman’s eyes, Jenna read panic. That’s when Jenna knew—Carson hadn’t just paid his parents a visit. Like he had with Jenna, he’d threatened them and given them a taste of what was to come. Had Patricia figured it out about the rodeo? She was probably worried about the effect it would have on her business. The idea sickened Jenna even more. Patricia looked like she was hoping Jenna would throw her a lifeline.

Too bad Jenna didn’t feel like playing along. Lou and Patricia Parrish had made their choice. They’d been so worried about their business that they’d denied their son medical care and the loving support Carson had deserved when he’d come out to them. They rejected him so completely that he’d turned violent. They deserved to panic. They deserved to have their business suffer when the town figured out what they’d done. They were so damn worried about appearances and money, Jenna wanted to make them suffer tonight. Why wait until the rodeo?

A tendril of outrage unfurled inside her. Yeah, she wouldn’t mind stirring things up. She and Tommy were out of there in a few days anyhow.

“Yes,” she said to the captivated audience. “Carson came to see me last week. He’s been through a lot, you know.”

“You mean, overseas, during his deployment?” Charlene asked. “I’ve heard terrible stories about what the soldiers go through over there. They’re all coming back with that PST, or whatever it’s called.”

“That’s not what I meant.” Jenna projected her voice. She wanted everyone to hear this next part. “I was talking about what he went through before he left Catcher Creek.”

Patricia shot to her feet. “That will be quite enough. I don’t feel right talking about him when he’s not here. Why, I’m sure his ears must be burning.” She made like she was headed to the kitchen, but Jenna cut her off.

“I’ve been meaning to ask you something, Mrs. Parrish. Something that’s been on my mind for six years. Why didn’t you take Carson to the hospital after Kyle, Bucky, and Lance tried to kill him? It was because you were ashamed, wasn’t it?”

The room hushed graveyard quiet. God, it felt good, calling these hateful women out, spilling secrets that had no business staying buried.

“What is she talking about?” Gayle asked.

Patricia shook her head. “I didn’t have a choice. Our business, our church . . .”

The last of Jenna’s composure snapped.

She swept a hand toward the women in the room. “Y’all are unbelievable. Kyle, Bucky, and Lance tried to kill Carson and all you cared about was what your church friends would whisper behind your back? You were worried about losing business because, what—people would’ve stopped frequenting the town’s only feed and grain store because of who the owners’ son was? What the hell is wrong with this backward town?”

“That’s enough out of you, young lady,” Patricia whispered. “You’re a guest in my house.”

“And I’m about to leave, trust me, but you have to answer me first, Patti,” Jenna spat. “When did you figure it out about Carson and who did you tell? Because someone told Bucky, Lance, or Kyle, and it sure wasn’t me.”

“Tell them what?” someone whispered.

Patricia’s spine straightened. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Jenna swung her gaze to Kate. “It was you, wasn’t it? Somehow, you figured out about Carson’s secret and let it slip to one of the good old boys you were hot for back then.” Kate’s face blanched. “It really was you. I can see it in your eyes. Didn’t you care what happened to your brother? You knew what would happen to him if you told the wrong people, didn’t you? Or is that what you wanted?”