How to Teach Filthy Rich Girls (24 page)

I looked over at Rose, who wasn‘t saying a word. Her head was tucked into her chest, and she had wrapped her arms around herself as if she could physically bind in her own pain.

I turned back to Sage. ―Rose told me a story. About the day the two of you left New York after your parents died. How scared she was on the plane. You know how she got through it, Sage? She got through it because of you.‖

Sage smiled in an unamused way. ―I know. I heard her tell it to you. When you two were out on the deck in the Bahamas.‖ Sage turned toward Rose. ―You had no right to tell her that. No right at all.‖

Rose nodded mutely.

―You‘re such an asshole.‖ Sage‘s words to her sister were as stinging as ever. Then she was silent.

I was looking out toward the water, trying to clear my foggy head and decide what else I could say, when I heard a sniffle.

―How do you think I got through it, Rose?‖ Sage asked her sister, tears in her voice. She put down the champagne bottle and sat up, swinging her legs toward Rose. ―Do you think I held your hand just for
you
?‖

I saw the realization dawn on Rose‘s face. ―But you didn‘t seem scared.‖

―Don‘t let it get around.‖ Sage reached out and took her sister‘s hand, as she had all those years ago. ―I . . . don‘t want to lose you to anyone, okay?‖

Rose sniffled loudly and nodded.

I stood. ―I‘m going to the beach to watch the sunrise. You guys should be alone.‖ I headed down the stone staircase and across the planked walkway to the temporary dock.

I walked out to the very end. A minute later, I heard two sets of footfalls as the twins joined me. We stood together for a long time in silence, as the first shards of daylight pierced the sky.

―Sage?‖ Rose asked.

―Yeah?‖

―As long as we have each other, we‘re not orphans.‖

They cried. I cried. The sun rose on all of us, all cried out.

When we finally went back inside, I hugged them both, then headed back to my suite.

There was one more thing I had to do. My iBook was on. I clicked on the folder labeled TWINS, the one filled with notes I‘d kept so diligently for my exposé. There was so much I could write if I wanted to, because at last I had it figured out.

Every time it had looked like Rose was growing close to me, Sage had freaked out. It had happened in the Bahamas, it had happened on the pool deck when Sage had oh-so-maturely thrown the pencil at her sister, and it had happened—albeit briefly—when Sage had realized that Rose knew more about my trip to Clewiston with Will than she did. Rose had told me that Sage hated all her boyfriends. But Rose could have hooked up with Orlando Bloom plus Bill Gates‘s bank account and Sage would have had the same reaction. The equation was simple. Rose + anyone = the possibility of Sage without Rose.

So much crap to cover so much insecurity, I mused. But maybe that‘s what happens when your parents die young, and all you have left are your sister and your bravado to get you through the scary moments.

I clicked on the TWINS folder and held my finger over my keyboard. And then I pressed ―delete.‖

Identify which part, if any, of the following sentence is incorrect: (a) Sometimes a little bit (b) of bribery is the only way to (c) achieve a (d) significant goal. (e) No error

Number eight,‖ I read to the twins. ―Who wants to take number eight?‖

In an effort to jump-start their brains, we‘d changed study environments and settled down for the morning in my den instead of on the pool deck. I was stretched out on my couch. They were sprawled on a floor that was already a mess of papers, books, calculators, notebooks, half-eaten bags of Healthy Pop microwave popcorn, and half-consumed bottles of FIJI water.

It had been a week since the long day‘s journey into the endless night of New Year‘s Eve. The twins hadn‘t spoken with me about it, hadn‘t even mentioned it. If they‘d talked about it with each other, they certainly hadn‘t shared that with me. But the result was impossible to miss—they were kinder to each other now. Sage didn‘t jump to the bitchy quip as often. Rose didn‘t look to Sage so much for approval.

I was proud of them, and I felt pretty good about how I‘d helped. I‘m sure you‘d guess, what with my sensitivity and maturity and everything, that all this would have been the catalyst I needed to pick up the phone and call my sister. But I didn‘t.

It‘s
so
much easier to be wise and mature on behalf of others.

Rose called Thom to apologize. When he didn‘t answer, she left a heartfelt message on his voice mail. When he didn‘t call back, she wrote him a letter (we‘re talking snail mail here, so this was perhaps a life first for her), which she‘d asked me to proofread so there wouldn‘t be any embarrassing errors. She‘d misspelled
psychological
and misused
vilify
, but otherwise, it was sensitive and self-aware.

I only wish her efforts had paid off. Thom imposed a total blackout. Oh, sure, Rose knew she could go out on the
Heavenly
and talk to him face-to-face, but personal progress did not equal personal transformation. I couldn‘t blame her. I mean, did you see me heading over to Barbados for a little face time with Will? Ha.

―I‘ll read number eight,‖ Rose volunteered. She picked up the test booklet, where we were working on grammar. ―‗Some Italians consider Americans to be overweight, wasteful, and they don‘t understand international politics.‘‖

―Who wants to correct the grammar in this part of the sentence?‖ I asked. ―‗
To be
overweight, wasteful, and they don’t understand.
‘‖

Rose pointed to her answer key. ―I‘d say E: ‗Overweight, wasteful, and ignorant of.‘ It‘s that parallel-structure thingie that Megan was talking about last week.‖

―Fuck,‖ Sage said.

―Too bad they‘re not testing you on that,‖ Rose joked. To my surprise, instead of getting pissed, Sage managed a half-smile in response.

―Review it later, you‘ll get it next time,‖ I encouraged Sage.

I hoped that my voice belied my concern. We had only seven days to go before the SAT, and we were running out of time for ―next time.‖ Their academic progress had stalled at the worst possible point—just below where they would need to be to get in to Duke. They‘d improved so much, but it still wasn‘t enough, and I was at a loss as to what I should do.

Rose admitted to being stressed about the SAT; Sage didn‘t. But I noticed that her nails, normally in a state of constant manicured perfection, had been picked and bitten to the nub. She‘d taken to curling her fingers under so that no one would see.

―Okay,‖ I told them. ―Let‘s try the first math problem in the next section. Rose, want to take a crack at it?‖

―My brain doesn‘t work this way,‖ Rose groused, trying to make sense of the equation.

―You can do it; I know you can,‖ Sage encouraged.

That made one of us. To see them working together was a thing of beauty, but between Sage‘s work on the qualitative side of the ledger and Rose‘s on the quantitative side, my optimism was dissipating like beach fog under the hot sun.

Rose knocked her knuckles against her forehead. ―I can‘t concentrate!‖ she lamented. ―I keep thinking about Thom.‖

―Honey, no love is that blind,‖ Sage stated. ―You were the one who kept telling me not to fuck us out of the eighty-four million. Take your own advice.‖

―I know,‖ Rose agreed. ―But it‘s hard. I need a break.‖ She pulled the most recent issue of
Scoop
from underneath her books. I half expected to see a photo of Lily Langley with her ―new mystery boy toy‖ or whatever my replacement had decided to call Will.

―Rose, put away the magazine,‖ I said gently. ―We‘ve got seven days. If you get up at seven and work until eleven-thirty at night, that‘s more then sixteen hours a day. Times seven, minus short breaks to eat and pee. Whacked up three ways between math, humanities, and writing.‖

The girls groaned in unison.

―Okay, so we know
you
won‘t take it for us,‖ Sage mused. ―But how about Ari?

Seriously, the guy is walking brain cells.‖

―Even Keith can‘t dress Ari to pass for you,‖ I told them. ―How about you decide you‘re willing to kick your ass and do everything I say, and
only
what I say, for the most important week of your life?‖ I looked at Rose. ―And you, too?‖

When I was little, my father had taken Lily and me up to Mount Washington one June.

He was a skier, we were both snowboarders, and he wanted us to hike up Tuckerman Ravine with him—it was still full of snow—and ride down as he followed us on skis.

There is no chairlift at Tuckerman. To get to the top, you climb. Both Lily and I were dying when we reached the last five hundred feet. I was only ten years old.

Lily quit. She threw both her board and her body down in the snow. But I did everything my dad told me to do, listened to every direction. And then I was up and over the last steep incline. At the summit, I buckled onto my board and took that first reason-defying plunge over the lip of the headwall.

And then I was flying. It took only thirty seconds to carve sweeping turns to where Lily was still waiting.

―You did it,‖ she said admiringly.

―I just listened to Dad,‖ I told her.

Why did I remember that now? I always thought of Lily as doing everything better than me. But that time on Tuckerman she‘d given up, and I‘d gone the distance. Memory can be so selective.

Sage got a cunning look on her face. ―Tell you what, Megan. If you do something for us, we‘ll do something—‖

―Oh, no, you don‘t! I‘ve been down this road, remember? Nude swim?‖

―Actually, what we want you to do is a matter of . . .‖ Sage leaned over and whispered in Rose‘s ear.

Rose grinned and then nodded. ―Sage is right. Something has to be done. About the hair.‖

This was the last thing I expected. ―But Keith cut it!‖ I protested. ―
The
Keith!‖

The sisters traded looks. Sage folded her arms. ―Let me put it to you this way, Megan.

Remember the fashion show? Rose lent you some panties?‖

―You are, in a word, hirsute,‖ Rose explained with great dignity.

I laughed.
Hirsute
had been a recent vocabulary word.

―I would not laugh if I were you.‖ Sage sniffed. ―Hirsute is a plus only on
her-head.”

I blushed, of course. ―It‘s not that bad.‖

―Excuse me,‖ Rose intoned. ―Nude swim? You were standing fifty feet away.‖

Sage made a chopping motion at her midsection. ―Waist.‖ She chopped two inches lower. ―Bush.‖

―It‘s physics!‖ I protested. ―Water magnifies!‖

―Remember that gift certificate I gave you to the spa at the Breakers?‖ Sage asked with unaccustomed sweetness. ―There was a reason for it. It‘s time to put it to good use.‖ She stared pointedly at my crotch.

―We‘re not talking bikini wax, either,‖ Rose added. ―And we‘re not talking landing strip.‖

Which could only mean . . . I was aghast. ―No. Oh, no.‖

―Oh, yes,‖ Sage said gleefully.

―Do that, and we‘ll do what you asked us to do,‖ Rose said.

Sage nodded. ―Twenty-four/seven for the next seven days.‖

Seven weeks ago, they‘d offered me a bargain and used it to humiliate me. Now they were offering me another one. But this time it was different. They were different.

Maybe even I was different.

Whatever look was on my face, they took it as a yes.

Three minutes later, the appointment was made. One hour later, I was on Jinessa‘s table at the Breakers. One hour and five minutes later, Jinessa was wielding a set of scissors, and I was keeping my eyes closed for dear life. Ten minutes after that, a spatula of liquefied wax came dangerously close to a spot where few—none of them female, unless I counted myself—had gone before.

I have heard that childbirth is excruciatingly painful. But I sincerely doubt that it hurts more than what the spa menu so delicately—but accurately—described as Surrender the Pink.

Choose the definition that best matches the following word: ACCOLADES

(a) punishment

(b) charm

(c) astonishment

(d) praise

(e) OMG,
the
best news ever!

Promptly at seven, please, Megan,‖ the Skull had intoned when he‘d summoned me to dinner with Laurel.

Mr. Anderson spoke in the same sonorous tones he‘d used for the past eight weeks; however, progress had been made—he‘d finally called me by my first name.

That made me smile, as did the fact that the twins had been true to their word. For the past seven days, they‘d been Yale-quality students, in effort if not in achievement. I had tried to make it bearable, but studying for the SAT can be mind-numbing. Even so, there‘d been a minimum of bitching and moaning. They‘d made a deal and stuck by it.

I was reminded of my end of that bargain every time I peeled down. The exquisite La Perla thongs that the twins had delivered to my suite while I was under Jinessa‘s ministrations were so beautiful that anything inserted into them would have to be considered a work of art. Not that anyone was appreciating my art these days. I hadn‘t heard from either James or Will. This, of course, reminded me of the age-old philosophical question: Is art still art if no one sees it? Or something like that.

Anyway, back to the twins. Every day we‘d worked for three hours in the morning, four in the afternoon, and three in the evening. Their practice test scores were in the low—

really
low—range of what Duke required. But they were in the range. I couldn‘t have been happier.

On this last morning before the SAT, we‘d done a review. Then I‘d told them that they were as prepared as they were ever going to be; they should forget about the test that afternoon and engage in their favorite activity: shopping. There are few things in life a Baker twin loves more than Worth Avenue and a coveted no-credit-limit black AmEx card.

So. What to wear to dinner with Laurel? I stared at my considerable assortment of Marco‘s designer hand-me-downs. I now knew that I looked best in peach, which brought out the green in my hazel eyes, and that beige washed me out. I decided on a simple peach Vera Wang cotton Empire-waist dress that wasn‘t too fussy or low-cut—