I Want to Hold Your Hand (40 page)

“Much better,” Hannah said with a sweet smile that only made him harder. How did she do that with just the subtle curve of her lips?

Homer took his time sniffing every bush in the parking lot before he finally lifted his leg and peed for what felt like an hour. Thinking about Hannah, waiting for him in bed, intensified the throbbing in Nolan’s groin. “Thank you for taking your own sweet time. You know us guys need to stick together, and you’re not helping me out by demanding so much of her attention. Don’t forget I’m the one who brought her to you. Maybe you could thank me by lightening up on the Velcro baby act, huh?”

Homer looked up at him disdainfully and continued on his beeline back to the room where his faithful Hannah awaited his return. The sad thing was, Nolan felt the same charge of excitement at knowing she was in the room waiting for him.

They went into the room to find every light off except for a faint glow escaping from the bathroom nightlight. There was just enough light for Nolan to see Hannah’s dark hair fanned out on the pillow.

Homer whimpered, wanting to be lifted onto the bed with Hannah.

Nolan unclipped the leash and gave him what he wanted.

Tripping over his own big feet, Homer ran across the bed to her, making Hannah giggle when he licked her face. “There’s my sweet baby boy.”

“The other one is here, too,” Nolan said as he unbuttoned his shirt and took it off.

“Daddy is feeling a little jealous, Homie, so how about you go to sleep so I can give him some attention?”

“I can hear you,” Nolan muttered as he went into the bathroom.

Hannah’s soft laughter and Homer’s little yips were comical to listen to as he brushed his teeth.

By the time he emerged from the bathroom and slid into bed, Hannah had settled Homer into a tiny ball on one of the throw pillows.

“It’s so cute how he just collapses when he’s done,” she said.

“You think the way he breathes is cute.”

“Well, yeah, that too.”

“I think the way you breathe is cute,” Nolan said, reaching for her. “Holy shit! Are you totally naked under there?”

“So what if I am?”

“Oh my God. Get over here, will you?”

“Since you asked so nicely.” Moving carefully so as not to disturb Homer, she scooted to Nolan’s side of the big bed.

“So, he’s going to get one half of the bed, and we get the other?”

She curled up to him, her breasts against his side, her arm across his belly and her smooth, silky leg slipping between his. “Do you have a problem with that?”

“No, I’m good.”

Hannah’s laughter thrilled and aroused him. “Thank you for putting up with me and my Homer obsession.”

“It’s a mess of my own making.”

“True, so you really have no one to blame but yourself.”

He tickled her and made her squeal.

“Stop! You’ll wake the baby.”

“I better find a way to quiet you down then.” He gave her a tug and arranged her on top of him, capturing her mouth in a deep, searing kiss that had him desperate and throbbing in two seconds flat. “Most of my team is in love with you after one night,” he whispered, sitting up to kiss her neck and throat before shifting his focus to her breasts. Cupping them in his big, work-roughened hands, he stared into her bottomless dark eyes. “Too bad for them you’re all mine.”

“Yes, Nolan,” she whispered, her arms around him. “I’m all yours.”

He sucked her sweet nipple into his mouth and pinched the other gently between his fingers at the same time, making her gasp. “Shh. Don’t wake your baby.”

Her smile lit up her face, and he’d never loved her more. She squiggled around on his lap, making him go blind with lust. “
Hannah . . .”

With her hand wrapped around his cock, she guided him into her wet heat. “Is this what you want?”

“More than I’ve ever wanted anything.”

She came down on him inch by torturous inch, and it took everything he could muster to keep from losing it the second he was fully seated inside her tight channel.

“Christ, that’s hot,” he whispered.

“Feels so good.” She moved her hips, taking them on a slow ride to paradise.

Nolan cupped the cheeks of her ass and squeezed as he surged into her again and again.

Her breasts rubbed against his chest, the hard points of her nipples arousing him to a fevered level of need that he’d never experienced before.

As she made love to him, he knew without a doubt he was ruined for all other women. She was the only one for him. “Love you, Hannah. Love you so damned much.”

“Love you, too. Just as much.” This was said in a breathy voice against his ear, which detonated a chain reaction that made his balls ache and his dick even harder as he gripped her ass and pumped into her.

She tripped over the finish line first, crying out as her inner muscles milked an explosive release from him.

Homer yelped out a bark that made them laugh even in the throes of passion.

Breathing hard, Hannah laughed until she cried. “We’ve scarred him for life.”

Nolan kissed away her tears. “He’d better get used to it.”

Hannah’s head landed on his shoulder, and he tightened his hold on her as he continued to throb inside her.

He reclined against the pillows, bringing her with him and she fell asleep with him still lodged deep inside. He was right where he wanted to be for the rest of his life. Nothing else mattered when she was in his arms—not his deadbeat family or his hardscrabble upbringing. Maybe he wasn’t good enough for her, but he’d be damned if he’d ever let her go. Soon enough, he’d make her his forever.

CHAPTER 28

I had the dream again last night. It was the same dream I always have. Caleb was there with Homer, and they were waiting for me. But this time Nolan was there, too. He held out a hand to me. Caleb did the same. I looked at him and at Nolan. Then I took both their hands and let them lead me forward. I’m not sure exactly what I’m supposed to take away from this version of the dream, but apparently I have room enough in my heart for both of them.

—From the diary of Hannah Abbott Guthrie, age thirty-five

T
he next day was a frenzy of activity that began with a quick breakfast with the team before they headed to the track for a day of time trials and testing of upgrades they’d recently made to the car, thanks to the sponsor money that had rolled in after Nolan led them to five wins last season.

After he got Hannah and Homer—who’d come despite Nolan’s suggestion he remain in his crate in the motel room until they broke for lunch—settled in the bleachers, where she could see all the action but remain close to the crew, he donned his protective gear and got down to business. It took a huge effort to focus on what he was doing when he wanted to constantly check to make sure she was still there.

While they ran safety checks and went over track conditions, he couldn’t help being distracted knowing she was watching him. It gave him a thrill to know she cared enough to want to be part of this important aspect of his life—and that she’d put aside her fears about him being hurt to come here and see what it was about. He loved her for that as well as so many other things.

“Nolan,” Skeeter said under his breath. “Quit staring at your lady and pay attention.”

“I’m not staring at her.”

“Yes, you are. Now knock it off, and get your head in the game.”

They were sharing the track with five other teams who had agreed to participate in a practice race.

Nolan winked at her before he put on his helmet and got into the car. The minute he was strapped in, he pushed every other thought out of his head to concentrate fully on the task at hand. One wrong move behind the wheel could spell disaster for the team, not to mention what it would mean for him. And with Hannah watching, he wanted only to show her the thrill of the chase without any undue drama.

They took a couple of practice laps, each car jockeying for position. As he pressed the accelerator and made a move to pass the car in front of him, a kick of adrenaline shot through him. Only one other thing in this world could fire him up the way racing did, and she was sitting in the stands watching him. Determined to give her a good show, he pressed the pedal to the floor on the straightaway.

 • • • 

Hannah’s mouth was dry and her hands were damp as she watched Nolan’s white car, with the large number 18 painted in red on the side, dart between the others at what seemed like a thousand miles an hour. He couldn’t possibly be going that fast, but what did it matter? At that speed, the slightest miscalculation would result in certain death.

He was going to die. The feeling came over her like a tidal wave, drowning her in unspeakable fear. She couldn’t do this again. No way would she survive it a second time.

Homer squirmed in her lap, disturbed by the high-pitched whine of the engines as the cars roared past them. Gas fumes and dust filled the air as the cars briefly disappeared from view as someone waved a green flag. And then, impossibly they were moving even faster than they’d been before.

Nolan shot out to an early lead, his car literally flying around the curves of the oval track and passing her again in a blur of speed and color and exhaust.

Hannah couldn’t breathe. Fear riveted her to the aluminum bleacher seat. She wanted out of there, immediately, but that would require moving, which she couldn’t seem to do.

He was going to die, and she would see it happen. At least when Caleb died, she hadn’t been there to watch it unfold before her.

Her hands were shaking, and only when Homer let out a yelp of discomfort did she realize how tightly she was squeezing him.

Skeeter landed next to her. “Ain’t he something? Look at him go! He’s a natural.” He looked at Hannah and did a double take. “Honey, what’s wrong? You’re white as a sheet after it’s been bleached.”

“I, um . . . I . . .” Before she could say the words, the car in front of Nolan’s seemed to spin out of control in slow motion, going airborne. A scream got caught in her throat when she watched Nolan dodge around the car before it flipped over twice and landed on its hood in the infield.

A yellow flag was waved as people and rescue vehicles and trucks raced to the hobbled car.

“Please,” Hannah whispered. “I need to get out of here.”

To his great credit, Skeeter didn’t say a word. He simply rose and took her hand and led her out of the bleachers to a side exit she never would’ve noticed had he not been leading the way. Once they were in the parking lot, he stopped, still holding her hand. “Where do you want to go?”

“Could I please go back to the motel?”

“You don’t want to wait for Nolan?”

She shook her head. “Not here. I can’t be here.”

“Whatever you need, honey. I’ll take you back myself. Let me just get my keys and tell the guys where I’m going.”

“You don’t need to be here?”

He smiled at her. “Nah, they only need me when the car gets smashed up, which hardly ever happens with Nolan at the wheel. He’s really good. That’s my truck. I’ll be right back.”

Hannah had seen with her own eyes that Nolan was a really good driver, but the feeling of absolute certainty that had come over her watching him race had left her panic-stricken. Somehow, someway she’d managed to survive losing Caleb. If she knew anything for certain, she knew she’d never survive losing the man she loved again.

While she waited for Skeeter, she put Homer down so he could pee and then picked him up to nuzzle his sweet face. He licked at the tears that flowed freely down her face when she realized the future she’d wanted with Nolan wasn’t to be if it meant living with this kind of fear on a regular basis. She’d already done that during Caleb’s deployments, and she’d discovered that was no way to live.

Skeeter emerged from yet another door and jogged over to her, unlocking his truck and holding the door for her. “Sorry it isn’t cleaner. I wasn’t expecting guests.”

“It’s fine,” Hannah said. “I appreciate the ride.”

They drove the short distance to the motel in silence that was only broken by an occasional yip from Homer.

As Skeeter pulled up to the door to the room she was sharing with Nolan, he put the truck into park. “It’s none of my business, Hannah, so tell me to stuff it if I’m totally out of line here, but that boy . . . He’s crazy about you, and if you asked him to give up the racing, he’d do it in a second if it meant he got to keep you.”

“I’d never do that, Skeeter. He loves it. I’ve seen that in the way he talks about it. I could see that in the time I spent with you all last night and today at the track. It’s in his blood.”

“So are you.”

“I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but I can’t ask him to be anyone other than who he is. He’d hate me for that someday.”

“I think you’re selling him short and vastly underestimating how far around the bend he is where you’re concerned.”

“Thanks for the ride, Skeeter. I really appreciate it.”

“You got your key?”

Hannah nodded and reached for the door handle. Every step toward the room where they’d known such bliss the night before felt like a thousand-mile march. Once inside, she curled up on the bed with Homer, willing her heart to stop pounding so fast she felt like she might hyperventilate.