In the Heart of Forever (19 page)

“I don’t believe you.”

Hearing those words again from her made something inside me snap. I stormed up to her and grabbed her shoulders, spinning her towards me.

Her eyes widened and she looked up at me with horror.

I wanted to yell at her. That was my goal when I had taken those steps towards her but seeing her ripped dress, made me crush her to me instead. I wrapped my arms around her shoulders, ignoring the fight she attempted at first.

Her body stiffened.

“Jesse, God, I’m so sorry.”

“Let go of me, Rave.” She pushed at my waist, trying to get me to release her.

“No.”

“Rave, please...” Her voice cracked.

“Jesse, what’s happened with us?”

She pushed against me. “I can’t deal with that now. You don’t need me. I’m better off alone.”

I held her at arm’s length as fury tore through me. “Are you fucking stupid?” I didn’t let her go until she kneed me in the balls. Fire and pain erupted from my groin, making me gasp for air. “Jesse, what the hell?” I croaked out.

She shoved past me and I heard her leave the room for a moment.

I doubled over, trying to catch my breath. Whatever possessed her to knee me? The pain tore through me and I had to swallow several times to keep from puking.

A moment later, she walked back over to the dresser, throwing more things into her bag.

“Jesse,” I said gruffly.

She turned to me, her eyes dark with fury. “Don’t. Just…” She took a deep breath. “Don’t talk to me. Don’t try to make me feel better. Just don’t. You’re not my knight on a black steed. I don’t get to have one of those.” She walked up to me and grabbed the picture of her mother off of the dresser. She sighed, running her thumb over the glass.

I didn’t know the whole situation with her mom. That was a very touchy subject with Jesse. We both had skeletons and dark secrets and neither of us were willing to share them…yet.

I took a step towards her and grimaced as the pain in my crotch simmered slowly. I placed my hands on her shoulders and kissed her head. “Bring the picture with you.”

She shrugged out of my touch and shoved the picture in her bag. “I’m going to go see my mom and then leave the city. I’ll hitch a ride somewhere. Anywhere but here is better.”

“Jesse, please.” I grabbed her chin, lifting her head. A minty scent washed up from her, filling my nostrils. I lowered my head and covered her mouth with mine.

A moment later, her tense body relaxed under my touch. She opened her mouth and moaned.

I let my tongue slip in between her lips, finding hers instantly.

Her hands grabbed my waist, pulling me against her. I took a breath and let her go.

“Rave.” The sound of her breathing my name almost made me lose control.

I kissed the corner of her mouth. “Not here, baby.” My voice came out husky.

She looked up at me, panting. “You don’t want me?”

I rolled my eyes and released myself from her. I paced her room, trying to cool off.

She huffed and hopped off her dresser. She came up to me, running her hands over my abs. “Rave, come on, please.”

Oh God.
Hearing her beg just about did me in. I grabbed her wrists. “No. We need to deal with the police and get you to the hospital.”

She huffed. “I’m not going.”

“Jesse, Allan almost…the police are going to want to make sure you’re okay and it’s evidence.”

“What if they don’t take Allan away?” Her eyes filled with fear, looked up at me.

“They will for tonight. You’ll be safe, baby.” I pressed my lips to her forehead, letting them linger.

“Thank you.” She walked me to the stairs and took a step. Her foot slipped and she nearly fell.

It was like my life flashed before my eyes, except it was Jesse I was losing. It happened so quickly, I didn’t even have to think about it. I grabbed onto her arm, spinning her towards me.

She cried out, bumping into me. Our breaths were ragged as we clung onto each other. “Oh God, Rave,” she gasped.

“It’s ok. You’re safe.”
Holy shit.
I ran my hands down her back and held her to me as tightly as I could.

“You…” She looked up at me, her big eyes glassy. “You saved me.”

I kissed her plump lips. “Of course. I wouldn’t even hesitate.”

She latched onto my chest and sobbed. “I’m so sorry.”

“Shhh…we can talk about this later. Be careful going down these stairs.”

She half giggled half sighed. “Yeah, no kidding.”

I cupped her face in my hands and kissed her hard. Her almost falling down the stairs made me realize that I needed to fight harder to hold onto her. I would make her see that she was perfect for me. That we were meant for each other.

I probably should have left, knowing what I did could get me into trouble but I needed to be there for Jesse. To make sure that everything was okay. If I had it my way, I would never leave her again.

We left the house and waited on the porch. I saw lights heading down the street. A breath left me on a whoosh that I didn’t even know I was holding. Now that the police and ambulance were there, I knew she would be safe. Since Allan was a lawyer, who knew how long he would be in jail for.

Chapter 26

Jesse

The EMS worker flashed his little light in both of my eyes trying to blind me. “I’m fine. Can I go back inside now?”

“We still need to ask you some questions and you need to go to the hospital,” Officer Pike told me. He was young. Maybe in his late thirties but the lines on his face clearly stated this cop had seen his share of atrocities.

I sighed and placed both of my hands in my lap. Rave wrapped an arm around my shoulders as we both sat in the back of the ambulance waiting for the interrogation.

Allan was still passed out cold when he was taken away by another ambulance. Who knew Rave could hit someone so hard. Allan was much bigger, but it didn’t even seem to faze Rave.

“Jesse.”

I looked up into Officer Pike’s green eyes. Eyes that had reminded me of Rave’s. Rave had protected me. Stopped Allan from continuing his abuse and stopped me from falling down the stairs like my mother had years before.

“Has Allan raped you before?” Officer Pike’s eyes turned cold.

I swallowed a couple of times. “Yes. Only once.”

He didn’t bother asking me why I didn’t go to the police sooner. I wouldn’t have answered him anyways because I didn’t know why. According to Allan I deserved it. Did I? At first I thought I did. Maybe I did something so wrong that he felt he had to punish me but after everything with Rave, I knew that it wasn’t my fault. I didn’t deserve any of this.

“Jesse, none of this is your fault,” Officer Pike told me. Oh God, not him, too.

Tears welled in my eyes but I couldn’t speak. My tongue was frozen and no words would form on my lips.

Rave kissed my head. “I’m here, baby.”

I needed him to hold me, make me feel better. Erase the pain and memory of Allan touching me. Violating me. It happened weeks ago but would I ever forget it?

“We’re gonna hold off for the night but…” Officer Pike’s eyes searched my face. “Is there anywhere you can stay?”

I nodded.

He smiled lightly. “Good. Now, who pulled him off of you?”

My stomach dropped slightly and I looked up at Rave. “I pushed him off of me.”

“And you knocked him out, too?”

“I knocked him out, officer,” Rave answered.

My eyes widened. With Rave’s rep, he could get in trouble. “Rave.”

Officer Pike nodded. “Self-defence, I see.”

“Yes,” Rave and I replied at the same time.

“Okay. I’ll call you if I have any further questions.” Officer Pike handed me his card. “You call me if you need anything. You hear me?”

I nodded. “I will.”

***

After the cops left, the ambulance took Rave and I to the hospital. Having a rape kit done on me even though it didn’t happen, made the memories of that morning come crashing into my head like it was happening all over again.

I argued that it didn’t happen again but the nurses said it was just a precaution.

For the past month, I’d been walking around like I was dead. Not caring about anything or anyone and especially not myself. I wasn’t sure what had happened to make me change my mind. Maybe it was kissing Rave again or having him hold me or the fact that I almost fell down the stairs.

It was like my life flashed through my eyes and seeing it play out that way, made me realize I had to fight. I would go visit my mother and leave the city. I wanted to be with Rave but I needed to apologize for all the crap I said to him first.

I fingered the strings on my guitar and sighed when warm arms wrapped around my middle. Rave leaned his chin on my shoulder and watched me play. I sighed and placed the guitar back in its case.

He had taken me back to Allan’s to grab my things. A moment of hesitation fluttered through me as we drove away from the house that I had lived in for the past several years. Would I be back? What if Allan found me at Rave’s? No, he doesn’t know where he lives. He wouldn’t be able to find him. Would he?

I wasn’t sure if Allan was spending the night in the hospital or jail but being away from him, made a sense of peace wash over me.

“Baby, are you alright?”

My heart fluttered at the concern in his voice. “Yes. Being with you is helping.”

Even after all the hurtful things I said to him, he was there. He was my knight in shining armor and I loved him. How was I going to fix this?

Chapter 27

Rave

Jesse curled herself into the corner of the seat as we drove back to my place. Getting her out of that hell lifted my spirits, at least for the night. How long it would last who could say. Allan was a lawyer. From the nice house and car, probably a big timer that overcharges. Guys like that could schmooze their way out of anything. Could find anyone they wanted. He’d probably find her too, but I didn’t care. I’d fight him. I would do anything for Jesse. I just hoped the cops would keep him in jail for at least the night.

“Rave.” A small hand landed on my knee.

I looked down at Jesse, the anger deep inside me diminished at the look on her beautiful face. I wrapped a hand around the back of her neck and pulled her towards me.

She sighed, leaning against me as we neared my place.

I ran a hand down her arm getting lost in my thoughts. I didn’t know what we going to do. Could we go back to school? Go on like nothing happened? Jesse had been doing it for the past month. Allan only raped her once but it was once too many.

The thought of leaving again for doing something stupid…I swallowed hard. I wouldn’t leave Jesse. If I got thrown into jail for hitting Allan or strangling him, then fine. I would deal with my mistakes but I would do it all over again for her. I didn’t regret any of it. Except for one thing: Allan lived.

I parked behind my apartment building and turned to Jesse. I lifted her hand to my lips and placed a soft kiss on her knuckles. “It’ll be fine, Jesse.”

She nodded.

If I only I could convince myself of that. I couldn’t expect her to come with me if I did leave. I didn’t even know where I was going to go. My stomach clenched with uneasiness as I tried to figure out my next move. I wish we had more time. I got out of the car and walked around to her door as she stepped out of the vehicle. I grabbed her bag and the guitar and took her hand, leading her to my apartment.

I unlocked the main door and we headed down the hall to my place. The smell of alcohol and smoke filled my nostrils, making me gag.

“Rave?”

I turned to Jesse. Her skin was pale, turning a shade of green. “Hold on, Jesse.”

She started taking deep breaths, her skin turning ashen. I unlocked my door once we reached it and threw it open for her. She stumbled inside and walked quickly to the bathroom.

As I closed the door behind me and placed her bag on the floor as the sounds of her emptying her stomach, carried through my small apartment.

I headed into the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water. I walked into the bathroom and found Jesse lying on the floor, holding her stomach and sighed with sympathy, placing the glass on the counter. “Jesse.”

She opened her eyes. “Yeah?”

“Drink this. It’ll make you feel better.” I handed her the glass.

She sat up slowly and reached for the glass, drinking it willingly. God, what she had been through tonight. Allan attacking her, almost falling down the stairs, being probed and prodded by the police. Even though we weren’t together, I wanted to protect her from all of the evil in the world. Avenge all of the wrongs that were done to her. The police would take care of Allan. They better or else I’d deal with him myself. Sitting on the floor behind her, I stretched out my legs.