Indulgence (360 page)

I risked a glance at Kirk, hoping that he’d say something
else to protect me for one more night. Ross tightened his grip on my hair and
jerked my head back. “He’s your boss, but I outrank him. Lay across the table,
with your feet toward my seat.”

My breath came out in a huff as my chest tightened, but I
forced my shaking body to do as he ordered. He spread my legs so that my feet
pointed toward the corners of the table. The same men from the previous night
filtered into the room, surrounding me, and then two women in cat suits served
dinner, placing Ross’ plate between my legs and two plates at my sides.

I wouldn’t be eating.

“Nice decoration,” one of the brothers said, slipping his
fingers down the top of my dress to squeeze my breast. I remembered their
names, but since they were behind me, I wasn’t certain which was which.

My chest shook with nerves as I inhaled and I heard them chuckle
at my jiggling breasts. Another hand slid up my leg pushing up my dress. Kirk
squeezed my leg, and I stared into his eyes, trying to find another place to
hide.

“Where’s the remote?” Suit asked and my heart jumped into
double time.

I watched Kirk swallow a bite of food then he fished the
small device from his shirt pocket.

I stared through the window above me to the sparkling stars
above as Ross began scrolling through the settings, leaving it on a steady,
intense buzz. For the first few minutes, I tried to separate myself from the
sensation, but my body started to respond. My hips tried to rock, and my
muscles clamped around the plug, forcing me toward arousal.

I caught Kirk’s eye, his heated glare indicating that he
noticed my arousal—probably like every other man in the room, but they all went
on with their dinner, leaving me on the table to swallow my agony.

While eating, Ross seemed to forget about the remote, and I
pushed myself ahead of the waves of stimulation, letting my mind slip farther
away, concentrating on nothing more than the stars above unless I had to.
Unfortunately, my mental escape did nothing to alleviate my physical arousal.

By the time they all finished eating, I felt like I’d erupt
with the next touch, but by then most of the men were paying more attention to
their own slaves than me. As the sounds of sex rose around me, I wanted to
squirm out of my position, find something to give me relief.

Ross pulled on my ankles, dragging me down the table toward
him. I tried to keep my gaze on him, but my eyes flew to Kirk as I moved.

Ross slapped the inside of my thigh. “I said I’m in charge.
You keep your eyes on me.”

He positioned my heels on the edge of the table, leaving me
wide open and exposed. He slid two fingers inside of me and I gasped and
bucked. I was already slick and wet with arousal, and to make the experience
even more horrifying, I moaned as he touched a vibrator to my clit.

As he pushed me closer to the edge, I tuned out the feeling
of the vibrations, but soon his rough motions and the pulses from the vibrators
seemed to cancel out my arousal until I felt numb. My slower, muted reaction
only spurred him on to push harder until they became more painful.

But at least the pain I could handle. I wanted to feel the
pain. It was more appropriate and less humiliating than the knowledge that
every person in the room might see me get off with the bastard.

Through the valley created by my legs, I saw him rub his
engorged cock through his pants.

Kirk rose, distracting me for a second and I winced. From
Ross’ smile, I couldn’t tell if he mistook that for a pleasurable response or
if he was enjoying my misery.

“She’s mine,” Kirk said, “I want first honors to have some
fun with her.”

I wanted to shake my head, but Ross stepped back and Kirk took
his place, sliding two fingers inside of me and hooking them up to massage my
insides. One simple move trashed all of my barriers.

I cried out and thrust my hips forward. His thumb circled my
clit in delicate circles—a sharp contrast to Ross’ motions—and as the numbness
from the vibrator wore off, his ministrations set off my arousal again.

His touch abandoned me for a moment, then I heard his pants
unzip. My helpless cry came out as a moan as his heated head pressed at my
entrance. I wanted to scream. Arousal tore through my nerves, but frustrated
anger thickened my blood. I grabbed the edges of the table as he pressed into
me.

So much for not being cleared by the doctor.

His first thrust was long and slow, and I felt myself quiver
around his large shaft. Why couldn’t he be furious? Pound into me? Fuel the
hate? Why did he have to turn it into pleasure?

The vibrations from the plug changed into a pulse, and I
involuntarily pushed against him, taking him deeper and shaking in physical
pleasure. I tried to pull back, anchor myself against the table, but that just
drove the plug in deeper, and I cried out, grinding against him again.

Squeezing my eyes closed, I felt the tears coming. I
couldn’t control my body.

He nudged my clit and the next thrust pushed me over the
edge. I plummeted over the other side crying out and convulsing into the table
as his thrusts became stronger and erratic until he emptied himself inside of
me.

The buzzing stopped and he slipped out the plug, dropping it
in a plastic bag that Ross handed him, and placing it on the floor next to his
chair. Then he pulled me into a seated position.

Do not cry. Do not cry
. I repeated over and over in
my head. I saw lips moving around me, but the mantra in my head was all I could
hear.

My body no longer belonged to me.

Every muscle in my body twitched as Kirk helped me into a
seated position at his feet. Kirk moved his leg and the smooth material of his
pants brushed against my arm. I wanted to jerk away when his fingers found my
hair, but I told myself to be good for the show. I followed the pull of his
hand and pressed my cheek against his thigh. On some level, I was thankful for
the bit of support.

The rest of the evening passed in a blur with people around
us groping and having all forms of sex. Ross brought in a few new girls, but
Kirk excused himself and by default, me.

I could barely hold myself up by the time we reached the
apartment.

“I need a shower,” I said, still trying to hide my emotions.

“I’ll fix you a sandwich since you couldn’t eat.”

“I’m not hungry.” I started for the bathroom, but he lifted
me to face him. The last thing I wanted to do was look at his face.

“Silver,” he said calmly.

“I hate you,” I forced through my clenched jaw.

“I know.”

I know
? The fury burned out of my chest, singeing my
throat, and I stormed away.

“Would you have preferred that I let Ross continue?”

Fists clenched, I spun back to face him, the five feet
between us spurring my confidence. “You could have stopped him before it all
got started,” I yelled.

“He gets his way.” Kirk’s forehead was creased with anger,
but he didn’t attempt to close in on me. “I have to pick my battles, too. He
wouldn’t have stopped. And you were fighting him, pushing yourself farther away
and into misery.”

“I was fighting what I didn’t want. I could have suffered
through until he was done. You humiliated me.”

I grabbed a cushion from the couch and chucked it across the
room, knocking a painting off the wall. The glass and frame shattered when it
hit the floor. Kirk moved toward me and grabbed my arm, and I felt the sting of
impact as my hand met his face. When I realized what I’d done, I jumped away
and fell to my knees.

“Oh, god,” I whispered.

Kirk cocked his head, closed his eyes and took a deep
breath. Veins popped out along his wrists and neck and I waited for the impact
to come.

“Next time I’ll let Ross continue until he gets tired of
you.” He grabbed my jaw and twisted my neck to face him. “He wouldn’t have
stopped with some little game. It was either him or me.”

“I thought my tests haven’t come back yet.”

“Then we better hope you didn’t lie. Ross wouldn’t have
taken that chance—and I knew the look on his face. If I had let him continue,
he wouldn’t have left you alone. And he wouldn’t have given a shit whether or
not you’re allergic to latex.”

As I caught on to what he was saying, my chest shook making
it hard to inhale. My stomach fell and twisted around. “Please.”

Kirk released me, speaking slowly and enunciating every
syllable, “Go take a shower, Silver.”

I stared back, I wanted my body to move because I didn’t
want to face the rest of his anger, but my body felt paralyzed and disconnected
from my will.

“You want to beg me for the impossible. I don’t need a
pain-in-the-ass responsibility who won’t listen to anything.”

My gaze fell to the floor. My stomach would have revolted if
it had any contents to throw up. I dragged myself to my feet, walked past him
to the bathroom, and turned on the hot water, letting it heat before stepping
under its abrasive stream. I had fucked up the only person who had stepped up
to protect me.

I curled up in the back of the tub, letting the water beat
down on my back, until the sound and feeling of the water was the only thing
that existed.

*****

The shower went off, but I didn’t lift my head. Kirk pushed
the shower curtain back and knelt beside the tub, draping a towel over my back.

“I wasn’t done,” I said.

“Quiet,” he warned in a whisper, “You’re skin is red, and
you’ve been in here for over half an hour.”

“I hate you.” The tears started falling, and I tried to rub
them away.

Kirk lifted me out of the tub, and to my surprise, he sat
back and held me in the middle of the bathroom floor. I wanted to fight, to
push him away, but even stronger was my desire to stay right where I was.

Safe.

I needed him. No matter what he did to me, or what he would
make me do. “Please, don’t let them….” I trailed off. “I’ll listen. I’ll do
whatever you want.”

“No, you won’t.”

I straightened.

“But,” he tucked me back against his chest and kissed my
forehead, “I’ll keep you.”

“So, you’re not going to beat the crap out of me for hitting
you and attempting to trash your living room?”

He groaned, shaking his head. “You really want to remind me
of all of that?”

“I hadn’t wagered that you’d forgotten already.”

“Get dried off,” he said, dropping the subject and helping
me to my feet, “there’s a sandwich waiting for you on the coffee table.”

As I rubbed the towel over my body and squeezed the water
out of my hair, he stripped off his now wet clothes. My heart pounded—I was
exhausted, but when I tried to look away from him undressing, I just caught him
again in the mirror.

“Trying to avoid me?” he smirked.

“Why do you have to notice everything?”

“That’s why I‘m good at my job.”

My insides were already at war. I wanted to scoff at him and
his “job”. He was a fucking criminal. Rapist. My temporary solace faded and my
chest collapsed, so I locked those thoughts away.

“Come on,” he said, taking me by the waist and walking me to
the living room. “Clean up the mess, then eat your sandwich and go to bed.”

“Can I…?” I looked down at my naked body, but Kirk pinched
the bridge of his nose and I decided against bringing up clothes.

“There’s a broom and dustpan in the kitchen.”

I dusted off the cushion and put it back on the couch next
to Kirk. Then I walked past him to pick up the broom and dustpan to clean up
all of the broken glass. I carefully stuffed everything except the painting
into the trash can and sat down on the floor at his feet to eat the sandwich.

Dangerous Game

The smell and crackle of bacon filtered through the empty
bedroom and pulled at my stomach as I rolled over on my makeshift bed. Kirk had
already unlocked my chain before I woke up, but I still debated whether or not
to get up and face him. When I’d gone to bed, his anger seemed cool and
contained. Now that he’d slept on it, it could either be worse—since he
wouldn’t be exhausted—or better if he wasn’t the kind to hold grudges.

Somehow I doubted he was big on forgiveness.

But what did I know? He was brilliant at reading me, but he
was the most confusing person I could imagine. If I could predict his reaction
just once, I’d feel less anxious about every move I made.

I rolled off the cushion, wrapped the blanket around myself,
and walked out quietly to peek into the kitchen.

Kirk glanced back at me then sat a plate down on the table.
“You going to wear a blanket to eat in?”

I shrugged even though he wasn’t looking at me.

He turned back and glared. “Put the blanket away. There’s a
robe for you on the back of the couch.”

I scowled and did as I was told. I expected the robe to be
something short and sexy that barely qualified as covering, but I got another
shock when I picked it up and slipped it over my arms. It almost came to my
knees and was made of a thick but soft terrycloth. I pulled it tight around
myself then returned to the table to take my seat.

“Thank you, Master.”

A robe wasn’t what I had expected after last night’s
outburst, but since I was certain he hadn’t left anytime while I was asleep, I
assumed he must have ordered it before my minor attempt at trashing his living
room.

I sat and stared at my food until he also took his seat and
began eating. For once, I was glad for the silence—and delighted that my mouth
wasn’t currently running faster than my brain.

After breakfast, Kirk took me to the living room. “I have a
meeting in a few hours, but you’re stuck with me until then.” He handed me a
bag and I pulled out an e-reader, a blank journal, and a book of crossword
puzzles.