Kimber (22 page)

 “That’s
understandable. I just need a few things. I already have Leo’s statement so now
I need yours.” Detective Muller cuts right to the chase. I remember liking that
about him. Always down to business. No nonsense.

I
never doubted Detective Muller’s drive. From day one he had been supportive and
spent restless days right beside me in search parties and helping with
suggestions. He once told me I reminded him of his oldest daughter who had been
hit and killed by a drunk driver. Maybe he thought by helping me he was helping
her. I never questioned his unwavering faith in finding my mother’s killer.
He’d always been realistic with me but I chose not to believe the statistics
against my mother’s return. The day Detective Muller delivered the dreadful news
to me had clearly been difficult for him. He did it gently.  

“Ok,
Detective Muller.”

“Please
call me Dan.” He requests out of the blue.

 “Dan.”
I say not knowing detectives give out their first names. I go with it. Dan was
a lot easier to say than the mouth full of Detective Muller.

I
give him the rundown of everything that happened the last time I saw Luke. I
take my time and accept a tissue Lena hands me. I recall the moment Luke
admitted his guilt in taking my mother’s life. Lena herself takes a few tissues
during this time. I’m cautious and a little fuzzy when explaining how Luke went
from being alive to dead on the living room floor.

When
I’m finished Dan turns his attention to Leo. “I’ll be turning the statements
and any evidence we find over to the D.A.’s office. They’ll decide from there
what to do with the charges. I’m sure they’ll be dropped.” 

“What
charges?”

“It
was self defense!” Lena protests with me. 

“In
Florida there’s a ‘Stand Your Ground’ law, but even though Leo had a right to
defend himself an investigation is required in any murder. I wouldn’t worry too
much about it.”

I
cringe involuntarily. It’s like the hell isn’t over. Luke has found a way to
torment us after his death. My only regret is that it wasn’t I who avenged my
mother. It shouldn’t be Leo in this situation. If it had been I who killed
Luke, I doubt there’d be any investigation.

Detective
Muller, Dan, doesn’t stick around. He’s eager to close my mother’s case. That’s
when I realize a pinnacle chapter in my life would be ending. What were the
possibilities for me now that my mother’s case would be officially solved? What
would the future be like if Leo went to prison for saving my life? I can’t
think that way. If it means spending every cent I have and calling on my mother’s
old colleagues, I will.

No
matter how many times Leo tells me to relax and calm down I just can’t. I try
explaining that the best defense is a good offense. I verbally list a slew of
lawyers I know by heart but Leo insists he has a good one. I’m worried and
angry. Unlike Leo I’m not willing to put all my eggs in the, it will all work
its self out
,
basket. I lived with a lawyer. Just because a murder
charge is thrown out doesn’t mean a laundry list of other charges can’t be
made. I try to explain this to Leo but he isn’t having it. He brushes it off as
if it’s nothing.

With
all my mental exertion used thinking about our predicament, I fall asleep on
the couch before I make Leo see my point. I feel him scoop me up as he carries
me to his room. He lays me on the bed, removes my shoes and slides the navy
blue comforter over me.

“Will
you stay for a moment?”

“Yeah.”
He walks around the other side of the bed and sits facing me. “Does it hurt?”

“No.
They gave me some pretty good stuff.”

“It’s
going to take some time to get used to this.”

“To
what?” I ask fighting the sleep that threatens to take me.

“At
some point, we have to move on. I almost got you killed.”

“No,
you saved me. Had things been different we might not know about Luke.”

“That’s
not true.” Leo whispers.  “I knew. That makes it my fault.”

“Knew
what?” My voice shakes.

 He
sighs heavily. “Between what Lena saw and what I felt from him, I knew. Lena
was having incomplete visions. I told her what I thought. She agreed. That
night on the beach, I couldn’t bring myself to tell you. I couldn’t put you
through it. What I did almost coast you your life. I’ll never be able to make
that right. I’m so sorry, aroha.”

My
mind starts to reel from this revelation. How could he lie and betray me? He
kept something so important from me because he thought he was doing the right
thing. In reality, I just can’t see it that way. I’m not a child. I’m not some
fragile doll that will break under pressure. She was my mother. The one and
most important person in my life. I had every right to know. I was the
only
person who had a right to know. Leo took that from me because he didn’t think I
was strong enough to take it. I can appreciate it, but I can’t condone it.

“I
wanna be alone. I’m tired.”

He
hesitates but doesn’t protest as he rises from the bed and closes the door
behind him.

I
pull the pillow over my head and whether or not anyone can hear me, I scream. I
breathe fast and shallow ignoring the pain I start to feel in my chest. I
scream again and sob aloud. So much inside me hurts. I’m so consumed in the painful
prison I’ve built I don’t hear Lena as she comes into the room. She wraps me in
her arms and together we cry. Not until now do I recall today’s date, July
Third.

THE
MORNING RESEMBLES night. Outside rain drums against the window. The wind
animates palm trees swaying them from side to side. For all I know there could
be a hurricane out there and I wouldn’t know its name.

 Lying
here in Leo’s bed, I can’t escape last night’s revelation. It taunts me. Demanding
to either be recognized or dismissed. I don’t see a way to forgive. One thing
is for sure, I can’t stay here, in Leo’s house, with him, in his bed, alone. He’s
different. We’re different. Today will obviously not be the first of all the
rest. It’s Sunday, a day that requires laziness. With any luck I’ll escape the
day free from lurking destruction.

Slowly
I start to ease myself out of bed. I expect every move to result in pain. I’m
surprised to find I can move with little to no discomfort. I’m astonished by
how revitalizing movement feels. It’s almost like I hadn’t slipped through
deaths fingers.

I
move to the front of the bed where a small leather bench sits with my suitcase
and purse set on top. From my suitcase I grab jeans and a plain lavender shirt and
get dressed. I peek under the white gauze concealing my wound. The angry
purplish scar that disfigures my chest has transformed into a calm pink. If
only I could use my body’s ability to heal at will, I’d be ten steps past Leo.
I pull my hair back in a ponytail and forgo any make up.

Hesitating
fear impedes me as I reach for the doorknob.
Luke isn’t here
, I assure
myself and pull the door open.

             “I know my
best friend. It’s a perfect distraction.” I hear Amber’s voice coming from the
kitchen.

            I walk down
the hallway towards the all too white kitchen. I feel like I should scrub down
and suit up before entering.

“Hey.
How you holding up?” Amber asks once I come into view, hugging me as if I might
break open. 

“I’ve
been better.”

I
won’t hold back from telling Amber the truth or as much of it as I can. She’s
one of the only people I have left that hasn’t crushed me.

In
retrospect I’m sure Luke had manipulated Amber into going along with trying to
convince me that I suffered from depression. It struck me as odd then but I was
blinded. He probably did it because he could. Because he was sick and twisted.
Hell, the pills were probably poison for all I know.

“Well,
luckily I’ve decided to cheer you up from your down. I’ve asked everyone near
and dear to come over later for a little potluck barbeque. So how ‘bout it? You
up for it?”

I
smile, recalling just how many barbeques this beach house has seen. As a group,
it has always been our favorite escape. But those days don’t exist anymore. In
those days friends didn’t murder my mother and things with Leo weren’t so…
twisted. 

“It’s
raining and I appreciate the thought, but…” I stop short of saying no. The look
on Amber’s face tells me there’s more to this. I may have suffered the biggest
blow but I’m not alone in the aftermath. My friends are wounded by Luke’s
deceit and just as effected as me. “But it’s not  my call.” I nod towards Leo
keeping my eyes off him. If someone has to be the bad guy, well, he’s mastered
it. 

Amber
turns to Leo. “Well?”

“It’s
raining.”

“Ok,
well, it’s rain not acid and it won’t last all day.”

“Fine,
but you’re on clean up.”

“Great,
be a pal and grab the stuff from my car, it’s unlocked.” Amber dismisses Leo
with a sweet smile and a flick of her wrist.  

“I
thought it was rain not acid?” Leo asks with a mocking smile.

“Yeah,
for you.” Amber strikes back.

I
dare to glance at Leo. He doesn’t look like his normal pulled together self.
His above six-foot two frame usually carries a certain assertive, alpha male
quality but not today. I hope it’s guilt. I hope he heard me crying last night
and on some level understands what he did to me. He walks out into the rain at
a slug’s pace. I hate how his LA Lakers jersey gives the perfect side view of
his muscled ribcage and tight biceps.

            Amber and I
split a soda and watch as Leo makes two trips to bring in the food and outside
accessories from Amber’s car. By the front door he plops down a red, white and
blue box with pictures of fireworks exploding in mid air on it. 

 “I
can’t believe I forgot!” It’s a testament to how screwed up my life has been. I
forgot my second favorite holiday. Easter being my first. I love bunnies!

“I
got a crap load of sparklers.”

“Yay!”
I squeal. Sparklers have always been my favorite.

I’m
not much help in setting up, since Amber’s deemed me as handicapped.

With
the rain showing no sign of letting up and the tensioned silence growing
between Leo and I, Amber makes a quiet attempt at kidnapping me until the party
starts. I’m stupid for saying no but once I leave this beach house I have no
intention of coming back. And since I can’t just leave Lena here I’m forced to
wait for her.

            I sit in
the kitchen, flipping through the latest issue of my favorite gossip magazine Amber
brought me.  

Leo
enters the kitchen walking past the wall which separates it from the living
room. I can’t help but stare as he pulls a gray Bulldogs shirt over his head
and down his torso. Even with the shirt on my gaze settles on his abs. They’re
not grossly ridged but softly outlined.

“Where’s
Lena?” I only ask after not coming up with my own answer. I’d prefer to stick
with the silent treatment

“She
left this morning before the rain. I don’t think she’s ever seen the beach.” He
opens the fridge and grabs a chocolate pudding cup. He sits down across from
me, opens the lid and squeezes pudding into his mouth.

“Ugh,
need a spoon?”

“Nope.”
He reaches across the table, steals my magazine and starts flipping pages.

“I
was reading that!”

“You’re
healing fast.”

Was
that a question or part of an article? I peer at the magazine from across the
table to see Mila Kunis wearing a stunning lavender lace Elie Saab gown at the
Oscars. 

“Your
scar?” He says as I look up from the table, into his green eyes. “You haven’t taken
a pain pill, right? You probably don’t need the Penicillin either.”

He’s
right. I am healing abnormally fast. Days ahead of what the doctor told me to
expect. In fact I completely skipped the process of healing and just… healed.

“Very
observant.”

“When
it comes to you, I am.” His eyes smile and my cheeks flush. No, he’s done an
undefendable thing. “But,” he continues, “I know you’re healing because the
blood they gave you in the hospital was mine.” 

“How
lucky.”

I
never thought to ask for my blood type. I guess I just figured when the time
came I’d find out. Ironically it happened exactly like that. Now, because I
wasn’t aware, I have his deceitful blood coursing though me. As much as I want
to dislike it, a part of him belongs to me, permanently, and he can never have
it back.

“Not
exactly. You may not be a Pure but your blood isn’t as diluted as most.
Especially now.” He smiles just enough to show his teeth. It’s endearing and
sexy and weakens my anger.

“So
what does it matter if it was your blood they gave me?”

He
cocks his head to the side. “You’d want just any ol’ blood?” I squint my eyes
and return his scrutinizing look. “Like I said, it matters because your diluted
blood is purer now. But mostly, it matters because this gives us a legitimate connection.
Through the blood we’re bound.”