“No, not really. Not at all, actually,” she amended. And then, before I could say anything else, she stood up and mumbled something about needing another book from her locker. I watched her sprint across the courtyard, so clearly eager to get away from me.
I closed my eyes again and sighed. I felt sorry for Cara, but her constant mooning thoughts over Michael were beginning to get on my nerves. Between her crush on him and Rafe’s open leering toward me—
I opened my eyes suddenly, struck by an idea. It just might work. At least, it wouldn’t hurt to try.
I got up and headed toward the senior hallway, running my eyes over the kids leaning against their lockers. Finally, I caught sight of Rafe ambling in the opposite direction.
“Rafe!” I called loudly, earning some startled glances from people standing around me. But my voice didn’t carry quite enough.
I threaded my way through the crowd and grabbed at his arm. “Hey! Rafe!”
He looked back at me, surprised, and then he smiled and cocked an eyebrow. “Hey, gorgeous. Couldn’t stay away another minute, huh?”
“Hardly. Can we talk for a second?”
Rafe nodded and looked around the crowded walkway. “Here?”
I motioned to a nearby doorway. “Yeah, right over here.”
He took hold of my arm—a little more securely than was necessary, but I ignored it—and we moved into the somewhat sheltered space. I backed up against the door and looked up at him, considering the best way to present what I had in mind.
Rafe leaned an arm on the door jam above my head, bringing his face just a tad too close to mine. “What do you need?”
I shrank back as far as I could and rubbed my damp palms against my jeans. “I had a little—um—proposition for you.”
He grinned again and eased back slightly. “Okay?”
“Yeah… you wanted me to—to tell you about what I can do?” I lowered by voice; the walkway was loud, but there was always the chance that someone might overhear.
Rafe nodded.
“Okay, then. My friend Cara—you met her, right? Pretty girl, sits with me at lunch?”
Can’t stop thinking about my boyfriend all the time?
“I know who you mean,” Rafe said. His tone was non-committal.
“She’s lonely. She, uh, she hasn’t been here that long either, and I think she kind of liked someone and it wasn’t reciprocated.” I needed to make Cara sound both needy and alluring. It wasn’t easy.
“Okay…” Rafe was beginning to see where I was going. I heard it in his thoughts and I felt his mood shift to cautious.
“Well, I was thinking. You know, you’re new here, and it would make Cara so happy if she had someone who—someone like you, to just, I don’t know, hang out with or whatever…” I was tripping all over myself. What had seemed like such a good idea at first was beginning to feel like a big mistake.
“So you want me to—what, date her? Ask her out? Be her buddy?” Rafe’s tone was twisted with sarcasm.
“I just thought you might reach out to her. Give her a ride home. Strike up a conversation. Be friendly.”
“And in return for my, uh, ‘friendship’”—Rafe sketched the quotation marks in the air— “you’ll spill all your secrets?”
I stifled a sigh. “I will tell you about what I can do. I’ll talk with you for as long as you want. You can ask anything.”
“When?” Rafe demanded.
I threw my hands up. “I don’t know. I’m off work tomorrow…”
“Perfect. I’ll come to your house right after school.” He backed away, about to meld into the crowd around us.
“Wait a minute!” I hissed. “What about Cara?”
He shot me his crooked grin. “No worries. I’ve got it covered.”
I waited for Rafe on my front porch the next afternoon. Although it was late September, the sun was still intense, and I pulled a chair way back beneath the eaves to find some shade. The street was quiet, although I could hear the occasional shouts of children making their way home from the nearby elementary school.
My mom was inside, working in her office. I had felt her barely veiled curiosity when I’d told her that I was expecting a friend and that it was not one she knew.
“Well, that’s great,” she’d enthused. “I’m glad you’re making new friends. Does she live close by?”
“Actually, Mom,
he
lives over on the other side of town, in one of those big houses.” When she raised her eyebrows inquiringly, I sighed and shook my head.
“It’s not a big deal. He’s new in town, and he just needs someone to talk to. Michael knows,” I added for good measure.
And it was true. In my new spirit of complete honesty, I’d told Michael everything about my encounter with Rafe on Monday at his grandparents’ home and about our meeting today. He didn’t say too much, and even across the phone lines I could imagine the reservations he was having.
“He admitted to messing with your mind, Tas. Call me crazy, but that’s not the kind of person I’m excited to have in your life.”
I pulled my legs up beneath me and closed my eyes, remembering his words. I hadn’t told Michael everything, actually. I had left out the last thought I’d heard from Rafe, about him kissing me again. Since it wasn’t going to happen, it wasn’t worth mentioning.
I heard a car turn onto the street, and Rafe’s distinctive red compact purred to a stop at the curb. I picked up his jaunty thoughts as soon as he climbed out of the car.
Today I get some real time with her. Gonna have time to change her mind, make her see how great we could be together.
He didn’t see me in the shadows of the porch until he reached the top step, and I felt his moment of consternation when he remembered what I could do.
“Hey.” He decided to play it cool, and I had trouble not rolling my eyes at him.
“Let’s get this straight right now, before anything else. You’re here because I keep my promises. I’m not interested in you, and I’m not going to change my mind.” I held his eyes with my own, challenging him to contradict me.
He hesitated only a moment and then shrugged. “Whatever. But I thought you were all into rules and not listening to other people. Why did you hear me?”
“Sometimes things sneak up on me, if I’m not concentrating on blocking. And keep your voice down, please. My mom doesn’t know that you know. I’d like to keep it that way.”
Rafe dropped into a chair near me and spread out his legs in front of him. I frowned, thinking that he really was absurdly tall.
He crossed his arms on his chest and looked at me expectantly. “So... spill.”
“What do you want to know, exactly?” I intended to give him only as much as was absolutely necessary.
“Everything.”
“Narrow it down. I’m not going to spend all afternoon here with you, and my mom is probably going to make an appearance at some point.”
“Okay.” He tilted his head, considering. “Can you hear everyone at once? Do you hear the answers when teachers ask questions? Do your parents hate that they can’t keep a secret from you?”
I was taken aback. Part of me had expected him to ask the same questions Michael had asked last year. I should have realized that Rafe would be completely different.
“If I let down all my guards, yes, I’d be able to hear everyone near me. But it would be like living with the roar of a crowd in my head all the time, and that would drive me crazy. So I block most people almost constantly.
“I don’t ever try to hear what teachers are thinking. That would be cheating. And I don’t listen to my parents, either. That would be rude.”
Rafe let out a bark of laughter. “Seriously? I thought you had to be holding back on me when you said you said you block people most of the time. But you honestly don’t use your gift? What’s the point in having it?”
I was instantly defensive. This was a constant struggle in my life, between the rules my parents had always held me to and the natural desire to use my talents more fully.
“The point? What are you talking about? I didn’t ask for this. I didn’t choose it. I have to learn to live with it. And what my parents taught me made it possible to get through life like a normal person. Most of the time, at least.”
He was silent, but I felt the speculative nature of his gaze on me. I concentrated hard to maintain my mental wall.
“You know…” His voice dropped, and he leaned toward me slightly. “I asked around about you when I first moved here. I wanted to know about Michael, and how serious you two are… and other stuff. I heard some interesting stories from some people.”
I narrowed my eyes. “What are you talking about?”
“Last year. Some girl, crazy or something, tried to kill you. I’m thinking it’s connected to those scars on your neck.”
Instinctively my hands rose to cover the marks. I couldn’t answer him.
“The girls who told me about it said you’d been into some weird stuff with their friend and it all went down wrong. She’s in a mental hospital, and you’re not.”
I found my voice. “Who told you that? Liza? Casey?”
He gave another half shrug. “One or the other. And I asked Cara about it, too.”
My laugh was brittle and mirthless. “I’ll bet that was illuminating.”
Rafe leaned back in the chair, studying me. “Actually, she didn’t have much to say, other than that no one really knows what happened. She did stick up for you. Said you’d tried to help the other girl, but it was too late.”
“It was complicated,” I murmured. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“I have a theory. I think you heard something—you know, with your mind. And I think you tried to stop whatever was going to happen.”
It was my turn to shrug. “You can have whatever theories you want. Just do me a favor and don’t spread them around. And please, don’t say anything to Cara. She doesn’t know about—what I can do. It’s just better she doesn’t have to deal with it.”
“She told me her dad didn’t like you too much, but she wouldn’t say why,” Rafe commented.
“Reverend Pryce—” I began, and then stopped. There wasn’t any point to tearing down Cara’s father. I changed the subject.
“So, you and Cara, you’ve been talking? I mean, I wasn’t trying to set you up or anything, but if you get along—”
“Sure you weren’t,” Rafe retorted, but there was twinkle in his eye, and I felt the turn of his mood. “I like her. She pretty much says what’s on her mind. She doesn’t play games. Smart, pretty… she’s not you, but I’ve been told I can’t have you, so…” He grinned and wiggled his eyebrows at me suggestively, and I couldn’t help but laugh.
It occurred to me that under other circumstances, Rafe and I could have been very good friends. I wasn’t sure that I trusted him, but I had to admit that he was likeable.
I pierced him with a mock-stern glare. “You’re not messing with her mind, are you? Altering her perception of time or whatever?”
Rafe laughed. “Nah. Haven’t had to yet. Give it time, though.” His smile faded. “Seriously, if I thought there were something that was hurtful to her or painful… I wouldn’t think twice. You think I’m on a power trip, that I abuse my—what do you call it? Your talent? But I don’t. I do use it. I’d use it to help someone I cared about. I’m thinking you’d do the same.”
I didn’t answer right away. Instead I shifted in my chair, bringing my legs in front of me and wrapping my arms around them. “Is there anything else you want to know about me—anything I’m going to tell you, I mean?”
“Yeah. A couple of things. Have you always been able to listen to minds?”
“All my life,” I replied.
“Hmmm. And you’re sure you’re not from a carnie family?”
“Pretty sure. I never heard of King until we moved here last year.”
“Why did you come to King, anyway?” Rafe asked.
“Job transfer—my dad’s. I’ve been moving around my whole life. This is the latest. Why do you ask?”
“It’s just that almost all the carnie families have some kind of… talent. It’s sort of odd, you being here but not being connected in any way.”
I considered, tilting my head to the side. “You mentioned that your grandmother can sense a gift in someone else. So your grandparents know what you can do?”
Rafe stretched his legs out again. “Sure they do. My grandfather can do it, too. And Grandmother is from another carnie family, so she’s got the perception thing.”
“And your mom and dad?”