Lost at School (31 page)

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Authors: Ross W. Greene

BOOK: Lost at School
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But even without this mentality, there are times, especially when a challenging kid is disrupting the classroom process and interfering with the learning of others, when the two ways of being responsive seem to be at odds. At these times it is not uncommon for teachers to feel that the dual agenda cannot be achieved and to begin the process of deciding which way of being responsive must be abandoned to salvage the other. In too many classrooms, the group wins out and individual challenging kids get lost.

The thinking goes something like this: “This kid is disrupting my class and interfering with the learning of the other kids. Despite my best efforts, I haven’t made much progress in keeping that from happening. While I’d love to be able to help him, I do have the rest of the group to worry about. I also have a curriculum and high-stakes testing to worry about. If I can’t help him, at the very least I need to minimize his negative impact on the rest of the group.” At this point, the teacher begins to consider actions that will segregate a kid from his classmates (seating him in an isolated spot inside or outside of the classroom, or sending him to the assistant principal). Of course, such actions only serve to further distance the problematic student from the peers who could have offered assistance.

The reality is that the two ways of being responsive are inextricably linked. You can’t do one without the other. Well, you could try, but it doesn’t work very well. The things a teacher does to be responsive to an individual kid actually enhance the group … and the things
a teacher does to be responsive to the needs of the group actually set the stage for the work to be done with individual kids. If, with an individual student, we use Plan B to teach skills and solve problems, the larger group will benefit because the student will learn the skills, the problems will eventually be solved, and the group will have had the opportunity to learn and benefit from the transformation.

If we actively promote a sense of community in the group, then the members of that group learn that they must be concerned not only with themselves but also with the well-being of other individuals in the group and with the group as a whole. Community members learn that they can and are expected to help one another. Everyone has gifts, everyone has things they’re trying to improve. When you have a gift, you lend a hand to the members of the group who need help. When you need help, you know you can rely on the group for assistance. When a community member overcomes a challenge, the community overcomes a challenge. Avoiding, ignoring, rejecting, teasing, ostracizing, bullying, withdrawing, being aggressive: These are all signs of problems that a community has yet to solve.

The community should hold regular meetings to discuss and resolve these problems. In some classrooms these meetings take place several times each day (for example, first thing in the morning and at the end of the day). Taking into account the pressures imposed by high-stakes testing, can the time required by such meetings be justified? There are data to suggest that such programs actually improve test scores.
1

What is the role of the teacher in the community? As articulated by Jeanne Gibbs, the teacher is a colearner and facilitator, rather than a giver of information. Teachers don’t have all the answers, and there is no one right solution to the problems facing the group. The best solutions are the ones the members of the group develop and own. In the words of Carol Ann Tomlinson: “The teacher is the leader, but like all effective leaders, she attends closely to her followers and involves them thoroughly in the journey. Together, teacher and student(s) plan, set goals, monitor progress, analyze successes and failures, and seek to multiply the successes and learn from the failures.”

Now, let’s think in more specific terms about what Plan B adds to the community-building process.

Plan B for Every Kid

Should you use Plan B with kids who do not have significant social, emotional, and behavioral challenges? You’ll find no downside in doing so, especially if you’re interested in engaging any kid in a process that ultimately helps him overcome problems he’s experiencing at school and teach him the skills he lacks. Potential topics for Plan B include difficulty with homework completion, disorganization, difficulty getting to school on time, difficulty getting to school at all, difficulty with a particular academic task, difficulty participating in class discussions, difficulty staying awake, fear of public speaking … the list is endless.

What would Plan B look like with an “ordinary” kid? No different from how it would look with a challenging one. Same three steps. Same process. Same goals. Can you get away with imposing your will on an “ordinary” kid to solve a problem? Probably, but why would you want to?

But, as you read above, another good reason to use Plan B with these “ordinary” kids is that
you want it to become the norm.
Plan B shouldn’t be something that distinguishes kids with behavioral challenges from other members of the group. Plus, the minute the “ordinary” kids catch wind of Plan B, they’re going to want to know why their challenging classmates are being treated differently. If Plan B is applied to everyone in the group, they’re not being treated differently. Of course, there’s nothing terrible about different kids in the same group being treated differently. Which brings us to another important mantra:

Fair does not mean equal.

Unfortunately, many teachers feel pressure to treat every member of the group exactly the same, most especially as it relates to behavior. Yet there is no classroom where every kid is treated exactly the same. In every classroom, kids are treated differently based on their unique needs (recall our discussion about differentiated instruction and differentiated discipline). Because every kid in a classroom has different needs, treating them all exactly the same would mean no one’s needs were being met.

Adults long ago came to grips with the “fair does not mean equal”
principle as it applies to academics (and the kids followed). The next seismic leap for our society is to apply the same mentality to social, emotional, and behavioral challenges. The kids will follow again. In fact, a lot of them are ahead of the grown-ups already.

Kids are keen observers of the world, and often question what they observe. Kids are bound to notice the obvious—that fair does not mean equal—and are likely to have some questions about it (“How come Joey gets to meet with you before school and I don’t?” “How come Daniel gets to sit at a desk during morning meeting and the rest of us don’t?” “How come Max gets extra time on tests?” “How come Kendrick gets to use a laptop to write stuff down?”). But, as noted by Carol Ann Tomlinson, children seem to accept a world in which we are not alike. They do not quest for sameness, but they do search for the sense of triumph that comes when they are respected, valued, and nurtured.

There are some key themes that can be incorporated into a classroom culture to move things in this direction:

“In our classroom everyone gets what they need,” and “In our classroom, we help each other.”

Let’s get a little more specific:

 

      K
ID
:
How come Daniel gets to sit at a desk during circle time?

      A
DULT
:
Well, as you know, Daniel has a hard time sitting on his mat during morning meeting. So the desk helps him have an easier time of staying in the group and helps him be able to participate better.

      K
ID
:
How come I don’t get to sit at a desk?

      A
DULT
:
Oh, I didn’t know you were having a hard time sitting on your mat during morning meeting. Are you having a hard time with that?

      K
ID
:
No.

      A
DULT
:
See, letting Daniel sit at a desk is our way of making sure he gets what he needs from us in our classroom. It’s our way of helping him. Just like we’ve been helping you with your reading.

      
K
ID
:
What if I started to have trouble sitting on my mat?

      A
DULT
:
Well, then we’d figure out how to help you with that, too.

Plan B Between Two Kids

Plan B can be applied to interactions between two kids, with the teacher in the role of facilitator. As always, you’ll want to make sure the circumstances under which Proactive Plan B is taking place are as optimal as possible, that the concerns of the two parties are well clarified, and that the solutions are realistic and mutually satisfactory. Let’s see what the three steps would look like in this context:

 

      A
NNA
(
in a conversation with her classroom teacher, Mr. Bartlett): I don’t want to be Zach’s partner on the slavery project.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
You don’t? How come?

      A
NNA
:
I just don’t want to.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Sounds like there’s a problem I should hear about. What’s up?

      A
NNA
:
I worked with him on a project last year. He always wants things his way and then he doesn’t do his share of the work.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Hmm. So he always wants his way and doesn’t do his share of the work. I didn’t know that.

      A
NNA
:
Well, now you know.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Have you tried talking to him about it?

      A
NNA
:
Yes! Last year I told him we needed to come up with an idea that we’re both happy with and that he needed to do his part, but he doesn’t listen.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Is this something you’d like my help with?

      A
NNA
:
Yes, I want you to let me do the project with someone else.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Well, that would be one way to handle things. But my concern is that a big reason I’m having our class do some projects in groups is so you learn how to work together, even with kids you don’t work very well with. If I assigned you to another partner, you wouldn’t learn how to do that.

      
A
NNA
:
I don’t want to be his partner!

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
I know, and I think I understand why, unless there’s more to it than what you’re telling me.

      A
NNA
:
No, that’s it. Can’t I just be partners with Kelly or Sabrina?

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Well, that’s part of the problem. They already have partners, and you already work very well with them. If we can get your concerns about Zach addressed, do you think you two could work together?

      A
NNA
:
Maybe. I mean, no. Anyway, it’ll never happen.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Well, that could be true, but maybe we could help him do a better job of hearing your ideas and do his share of the work.

      A
NNA
:
How?

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
I’m not sure yet. I think we need to talk to Zach about it. Do you want me to talk to him myself or do you want to be part of the discussion?

      A
NNA
:
I want you to talk to him. But I don’t want him to think I was trying to get him into trouble.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
I think he knows enough about how our classroom works to know that you aren’t trying to get him into trouble. But I was thinking that you might have some good ideas for solutions. So maybe it would be helpful if you were part of the discussion, even if I do all the talking at first.

      A
NNA
:
Fine.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Should we try to find a time for you and me and Zach to talk things over?

      A
NNA
:
OK.

 

Next discussion, with Zach, Anna, and Mr. Bartlett:

 

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Zach, as you know, in our classroom, when something is bothering somebody we try to talk about it. As I mentioned to you yesterday, I thought it might be a good idea for me and you and Anna to talk together about the project you guys are supposed to be doing together.

      Z
ACH
:
OK.

      
M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Anna has some concerns about what it’s going to be like doing the project with you. It sounds like you guys worked on a project together last year, yes?

      Z
ACH
:
Yup.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
I don’t know if you knew this, but Anna came away from that project feeling like you weren’t very receptive to her ideas and feeling like she did most of the work. So she wasn’t too sure she wanted to do this project with you.

      Z
ACH
:
She doesn’t have to do the project with me. I can find another partner.

      M
R.
B
ARTLETT
:
Yes, she was thinking the same thing. But I was hoping we could find a way for you guys to work well together. What do you think of Anna’s concern?

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