Love Me: The Complete Series (41 page)

“Amanda?”

“Um … we should probably not talk about that right now. Please tell me that wasn’t what you wanted to ask because I might lose it and well, my temper isn’t exactly the sweet, feminine kind. I
really
lose it.”

He doubted that. She was as cool as an ice cube on the North Pole in his eyes. “My question was business related and we can talk on the phone now if you’d rather, but you’re the one who suggested lunch and I’m okay with a little food and business. You dropped a bomb on me the other day and didn’t explain yourself and now you want me to ignore that anything was said. It wasn’t the reason for my call but I’d still like to know what made you leave.”

“I have my reasons.”

“Maybe you could explain them because apparently the reason has something to do with me.”

Amanda wasn’t prepared for vulnerability. Seeing Jackson’s face in the business section of
The Chronicle
was disturbing. He looked sad and angry at the same time but the clincher look was—vulnerable. She’d never seen that emotion in him and hadn’t expected to care if she did. It would be easy to distance herself from him again, except for Carter. Jackson and Carter were friends, and if she kept seeing Carter, Jackson was likely going to be a regular distraction.

Amanda told herself it didn’t matter. Jackson wasn’t a problem anymore. Still, there he was in the paper wearing the striped shirt she remembered. She loved that shirt on him. He rolled the sleeves and sometimes untucked the shirttail at work which made him look comfortable and incredibly earth-sexy.

The deli they’d chosen for lunch was a short drive and she made it with time to spare. She waited outside, scanning the article and trying to understand the emotions it invoked. Jackson was touted as the playboy heir to his father’s business. It was odd that the article made the papers since their company was small compared to so many others in the city. The description of Jackson was accurate only in that he was a playboy and enjoyed life—but they made him out as stupid and incapable.

Did they not know the man like she did? In college, he had patiently worked through their law class study sessions with the entire group, often explaining what many hadn’t understood. At work, they’d collaborated many times on key points related to contracts or issues. Given a chance, he would contribute as much or more than most and do so in an unassuming and non-intrusive manner.

Jackson was neither stupid nor incapable. He was misunderstood more than anything. Was that intentional?

“There she is.” Jackson’s voice carried on the breeze outside the restaurant. Amanda turned to greet him and stilled. She hadn’t expected him to have additional company and certainly wasn’t prepared to see someone she’d thought she was rid of forever. A man who’d made her career take an unexpected turn—her old boss. “I told David I was meeting you and he asked if he could join us. That’s okay, right?”

Uh,
nooo.
“Sure, fine. Good to see you, David,” she lied. The last time she’d seen David, he had informed her the Holstenar family no longer needed her services. Why? Because she was getting too involved with Jackson and not following through on projects she was assigned. Total crap in her opinion because she was never
involved
with Jackson and her projects were not only on schedule but most were ahead of the planned time frame. When she’d asked if her departure had been discussed with Jackson, David had told her it was Jackson’s idea.

The words still burned—not that the family didn’t want her, nor that David felt her easily dispensable, but Jackson had wanted her gone and didn’t have the stomach to tell her himself.

Amanda pasted on a smile and led them in for a meal that suddenly wasn’t at all appealing. Once seated, a waiter thrust menus in their faces.

Jackson’s phone rang and he glanced at the screen. “Uh oh, I need to take this. Give me just a second.” The chair legs screeched against the floor as he stood and stepped toward the door. Perfect. He’d left her alone with David.

Awkward. Amanda pretended to be immersed in the menu for several minutes. When she could bear the silence no longer, she snapped the plastic shut and dropped it on the tablecloth.

“Soooo, how’s life treating you? Ran anyone else off lately? Or do you save that special thing for people who work harder than you?”

David frowned. “Look, you know I did the right thing. You’re making twice as much money where you’re at and there’s no one to pick and choose your projects. Besides, this wasn’t about you. It was about family. Family is all that counts.”

What the hell was he talking about? He wasn’t part of their family.

“Sorry about that.” Jackson dropped into his chair. “Has the waiter taken drinks yet?”

Dumfounded, Amanda shook her head.

“Well, I need one.” He turned his head and signaled for help.

They avoided everything to do with work and when Jackson started to discuss old projects they had in common, David squelched his words.

If David had lived in the sixties, he would have dressed like one of the Mormon boys that came to her parents’ door and sold pencils while trying to give a sermon. His hair was always cut a bit short and plastered neatly with a lot of gel. He would have worn a white starched shirt with a pencil thin dark tie and dark pants. The new version was less obvious and didn’t stand out. David wore khaki pants and a long-sleeved polo with a white collar. The style of dress wasn’t unusual in itself. In truth, Amanda had been fine with his dress code.

Just not with David. He tried too hard. Something about the fact that he was in a constant state of intent-to-impress was—creepy, forced. Disingenuous. David was disingenuous.

Jackson, however, moved with ease and seemed unconcerned with the effect he had on the people around him, though Amanda knew he cared. A lot, in fact, which made his statements and actions more believable. It was ironic that in order to be believed and trusted, one should not care about being either.

The only good thing about lunch with the two men was she didn’t have to discuss the anger and hurt she’d felt at knowing Jackson had wanted her dismissed. She wasn’t ready to do so and certainly not in front of David. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. Nope, he’d never know how crushed she’d been. When the two men walked away together after lunch, she was relieved and perplexed.

Why had David wanted to join Jackson? He’d made it clear she wasn’t needed any longer. He’d also made Jackson’s intentions pretty transparent in the process. Was there more?

A truck horn blared at the same time her cell phone kicked into action and Amanda changed her focus to the phone call. Her mother.

“We need you to come home, sweetie.” Mom’s endearment was sweet even if she did use the words on all her children. It was her mother’s way of putting affection into a conversation regardless of the subject. The Southern way, she always said.

“What’s wrong? Is Dad sick? I don’t know that I can book a flight that quickly.”

“Nothing like that. I meant next month. We’re planning to do a little remodeling and need some help, plus your brothers will be here and it just wouldn’t be the same without you.”

Her mother had a habit of leaving out small, yet crucial points in a conversation, like dates, times, and the importance of events. She’d say something that put one in a panic only to fully explain afterward. It drove Amanda bat-crazy.

After speaking for a few more minutes, Amanda was committed to a family weekend in three weeks. The thought of seeing her brothers and mother together for the first time since the holidays was both foreboding and pleasant.

• • •

Jackson regretted allowing David to horn in on his lunch plans the minute he’d agreed. He’d hoped for some alone time with Amanda—not the personal kind but more the professional and confidential type where he could discuss some of her prior projects without any other ears or eyes involved. He didn’t trust David enough to involve him in those conversations yet he felt he owed it to the man based on his role in the company.

Those choices were easier a week ago. Now, after taking on tasks that his father had always handled, the possibility of choosing badly had grown significantly. The company financials sprawled on the corner of Dad’s desk were a stark reminder. Dad had made several notes and positioned the list of notes under the document as if to hide them. The notes were cryptic but the triple line under one name seemed critical. He’d found the list last night when it slipped to the floor as he scooped the financial document to shove it in his satchel for night reading. He had retrieved the list and scanned it, then decided to leave all as it was and research further.

When Jackson rounded the massive mahogany desk and settled into the uncomfortable chair, the papers seemed to wave a flag. David had followed Jackson into the office and focused immediately on the documents. Jackson was tired. Tired of David’s questions and constant blabber of advice, another situation that Jackson wanted to escape. He tried limiting his responses in the hope that David would get the message and leave.

David pointed a toothpick that he’d been chewing at the papers. “You need to approve those today. They’re due to the board next week and the admin staff will need to make copies of the signed documents and bind them in packets for the board meetings.”

“I know. I’ll get to it this afternoon. I have a couple of calls to follow up on first.”

David tossed the toothpick in the ornate copper trash can by Robert’s desk. “If you want to sign them now, I’ll take them down and save you a little time.”

It seemed innocent enough and Jackson should take him up on the offer. But his father’s note, well hidden, tapped him on the shoulder as if to say “why the rush?”

David lowered a hand to the financials and pushed them toward Jackson. Thankfully the note underneath stayed.
Is he forcing me to sign?
Jackson’s shoulders bunched and the hair at the nape of his neck rose.
No one forces me to do anything.
He had yelled it to a teacher in grade school right before pouncing on another ten-year-old who’d threatened to beat him up if he didn’t supply answers to a homework assignment. He’d landed in detention then because the teacher hadn’t known what the true issue involved and he saw no need to divulge. He wasn’t a rat but he wasn’t a wimp either. There had been many incidents over the years where his will was tested. He’d never been good at acquiescing.

Jackson leveled his gaze on David, reached out to the papers, and planted his fist to anchor them in place. He lowered his voice in a manner that he’d learned from Dad, who believed very strongly in Teddy Roosevelt’s motto, “Speak softly and carry a big stick.”

“I said I’ll do it this afternoon. I have some calls to make now, David. Thanks for joining me for lunch. I will see you later.” Jackson picked up his phone and punched in a number. It wasn’t really business, just Carter, but the point was made. As soon as Carter answered, he dove into conversation and ignored David. Would he get the message or was this destined to go an extra round?

David hesitated, then removed his hand from the stack and strode out of the office. As soon as the door closed, Jackson whispered. “Carter, would you mind terribly if I sought a little legal advice from Amanda? There’s something weird going on here and I can’t discuss it internally. I want a second opinion.”

Carter hesitated. “Why Amanda?”

“Because she worked here and she knows one of the contracts I’m concerned about. Before Dad had his stroke, we were about to close on a pretty large contract with a construction outfit in Philly. The client was overseas and this project had been on and off at least three times. Amanda worked on the first revisions before she left.”

“That was nearly two years ago, Jax. I doubt she remembers.”

He was wrong about that. Amanda had the mind of a vacuum cleaner. Once she’d sucked it in, it stayed forever. He pitied the man who ever sought a relationship with her. He’d get away with nothing. “Maybe but I’d just like to discuss it with someone outside the company. I need a little advice and don’t want to seem inept here.” It wasn’t exactly the full story but good enough. Carter would understand his desire to prove himself in the new role and hopefully be a bit sympathetic to the cause.

Carter agreed, though he seemed reluctant. Jackson wasn’t sure why he had a tinge of guilt for asking. It was just a business discussion, right? Besides, she’d already expressed an interest in his friend and Carter seemed to finally be enjoying himself with a woman. Jackson should be happy for his friend. At least one of them was happy with a woman worth being around. Carter deserved it and Jackson should support that and revel in his luck. All Jackson needed from Amanda was professional advice—he was confident she’d be the best source.

So, why did he feel a storm coming?

Stop living in the past.
It couldn’t be changed so why waste the time? She wasn’t sure what she’d change if she could anyway—her current job was far above the role she’d played at the Holstenar Advisory Group. Maybe her love life? The only candidate there was Carter. And Jackson? Well, he was entertaining but not a bit serious when it came to relationships, which was in total opposition to her respect for commitment. No, she’d wasted too much time in their weird friendship already. It was time to move on.

Her cell phone summoned and she glanced at the display and sighed. It was confirming her thought apparently; the number was Carter’s.

“Jackson called about you.”

Her desk chair screeched as she jolted upright. “He did? Why?”

“He wanted to get a legal opinion about something you worked on a couple of years ago. Some contract. I told him you probably had forgotten much of it but I wanted to let you know in case he called.”

Forgotten a legal matter? Not likely. “Okay, well, thanks for letting me know.”

“Wait. Don’t go yet. Look, I had a great time last weekend. You want to come over tonight? I’ll cook dinner.”

Awww, he wanted to cook for her? “Sure, why not?”

“And we can watch the Astros game.” Carter loved the Astros. Amanda had to admit she enjoyed the games too, though it was primarily a people-watching exercise for her.