Lover's Roulette (8 page)

He smiled. “I wouldn’t stop you.”

I pulled his shirt over his head. “Tell me you love me.”

He cupped my face and looked into my eyes. “No. I’ll show you.” He moved further over me then placed my legs over his shoulders. I loved the look in his eye, the face he made when he made love to me. He got as close as he could, his face pressed to mine and my legs pinned against his chest. I felt so small compared to him. He was at least three times my size.

I dug my fingers into his hair and waited for him to enter me. Slowly
, he pushed against me and slid inside. I gasped like I always did when I felt him. He always felt so good. He moved inside me gently, slower than usual. I didn’t feel the sexual arousal like I always felt when we had sex. I just felt the throb of love in my heart. When I was broken and depressed, he made me feel loved and safe. I was everything to him and I felt it in every gesture he made. I was his entire world and that made everything more bearable. As long as I had him in my life, my past wouldn’t get me. My mom couldn’t touch me.

I felt the tears bubble in my eyes, not from sadness but joy. I finally had someone that would do anything for me other than Ryan. He was devoted to me, obsessed with me, and loyal to me. Now I didn’t have to feel afraid all the time. I had someone to take care of me if I needed it. I didn’t have to be strong all the time.

Sean looked into my face and saw my tears. His eyes started to water as well. I cupped his face and held him closer to me. “I love you so much,” he whispered. His eyes were turning red as he looked at me. The sight burned my heart. I never thought this would happen. I always thought I loved Sean more than he would ever love me. I was fine with that. It’s exactly what I expected. But now I was totally wrong. He loved me far more than I could ever love him. It wasn’t even a close race.

8

I felt my arm move across my chest. I didn’t want to open my eyes but I was curious why Sean was moving me around in such an awkward way. One eye opened and I saw Sean pointing his phone at me.

“Don’t move,” he whispered. “Close your eyes.”

I sighed then closed my eyes. I felt him place his large hand on my ribs underneath my breasts, which were covered by my arm.

The bed shifted as he moved slightly to take more pictures. “You’re so beautiful, Scar.”

I opened my eyes and looked at him. He was looking at his phone, scrolling through the pictures he just took. I looked at my hand, which was placed on the pillow. My engagement ring shined even in the darkness of our hotel room. “Why do you always take pictures of me?”

He didn’t look at me, his gaze focused on his phone. “You’re my muse.”

“How many pictures do you have?”

“Five hundred.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

“I need to get a better data plan so I can hold more.”

“And what are you doing to do with all those pictures of me sleeping?”

He shrugged. “I like to look at them. You’re so different when you sleep.”

I raised an eyebrow. “So I’m not bea
utiful when I’m awake and alert?”

“Well, you are talking. That’s why,” he teased.

I hit his arm. “What do you mean?”

“You’re just different. It’s my fantasy. You’re lying next to me, wearing the ring I bought you. The world is quiet and everything else seems irrelevant except for you. I can stare at you all I want and never be caught.”

“That sounds a little creepy.”

He smiled. “I’m a creeper when it comes to you.”

“Maybe I should put some clothes on…”

“Nope,” he said as he placed his hand on my waist. “You’re mine.”

“Getting creepier…”

He rubbed his nose against mine as he chuckled. “How are you feeling, babe?”

“My head doesn’t hurt as much, but I feel totally paralyzed. I don’t want to do anything today.”

“Well, we already have plans.”

“What plans?”

“We’re meeting downstairs for breakfast.”

“Ugh.”

“Ugh? You love to eat.”

“Not right now.”

“Come on. You’ll feel better after you have a shower.”

“Can we just lay around and fuck all day?”

His eyes widened, his interest piqued.

It had the exact effect I wanted.

Suspicion clouded his mind. “I know what you’re doing.”

“Damn.”

“Now let’s take a shower.”

I shook my head. “No.”

“I’ll make you.”

“Give it your best shot,” I challenged.

He left the bed then walked into the bathroom. I heard the shower turn on and the water fall. When he came back into the bedroom, he was naked. His cock was hard and
it immediately caught my attention. He leaned over me and kissed me gently, his tongue lightly touching mine. He made me gasp with need.

“I know what you’re doing,” I said between kisses.

“Damn.” He broke our kiss then walked into the bathroom.

Now I was turned on, so I followed him inside the shower.

He smiled when he looked at me. “Works every time.”

I grabbed the small shampoo bottle offered by the hotel and squirted it into my palm. I rubbed my tits while I stared at him then soaped my ass. The bubbles were covering my smooth body, dripping on the tile floor. Sean watched me with heat in his eyes. I continued to massage my breasts while he looked at me. When I started to get more aroused from touching myself I felt dirty.

“God, I love these,” he said as he grabbed my tits and massaged them. My hands moved to his chest then down to his erection. “You have the nicest tits I’ve ever seen.”

“Thanks.”

He pushed me against the wall and let me stroke him. “You’re so good at that.”

“I know,” I said with a mischievous smile.

He moved one hand between my legs and started to finger me. His other hand continued to grip my breasts, massaging it in his palm. We stared at each other while we touched each other, the warm water falling on us.

“Harder,” he said.

I moved up and down his shaft with a quicker speed.

He continued to finger me while he rubbed my clitoris. My pussy was on fire and I felt myself begin to melt.

When he closed his eyes and groaned, I knew he was going to come. He always made the same face. He shot out on my breasts and stomach, slightly thrusting into my hand as he came. “Fuck, you’re so hot.”

Seeing him crumble before me made my own walls collapse. I bit my lip a
s I came. His eyes became dark and heated as he watched me, his fingers rubbing me harder. I grabbed his shoulders and held on tight so I wouldn’t fall over as I leaned my head back and moaned.

“You look so beautiful when you do that.”

I rested my head against his chest as I recovered from the momentum.

He pulled his fingers out then placed them in his mouth, sucking on them. “Sweet as always.”

Now I was sleepy and still hung over. I just wanted to go back to bed.

Sean read my mind. “No. We’re going down to breakfast.”

I whined.

“You’ll feel better after breakfast.” He turned off the water then patted me down with a towel. He rubbed my breasts longer than necessary then wiped the area between my legs.

“You’re such a pervert.”

“I won’t refute that.” He placed the towel in my hair then dried the strands. When he was done, he sniffed the fabric. “Smells like you.”

“Are you going to jack off with it?”

He smirked. “I might.”

“Creeper.”

“But I’ll probably just use your panties instead. They are softer. Especially your dirty ones.”

“I can’t believe I’m marrying such a gross man.”

“You like it when I’m gross. If I can put up with you eating shit off the ground and making out with girls, you can accept this sickness.”

I covered my face, realizing I was about to be ridiculed by my family. “I’m not going down to breakfast.”

“Why?”

“I’ll never hear the end of it.”

He laughed. “You have to face the music sometime.”

“This is like the worst thing ever. My brother will never, ever stop teasing me about it.”

Sean shrugged. “I don’t know what to say.”

“Let’s just go home.”

“Well, you’re going to see them at the wedding.”

“We won’t invite them.”

Sean laughed and walked out. “I’m looking forward to breakfast.”

“Ugh. You’re such a gross pervert!”

“Once again, I don’t refute that.”

“Did you delete that video off your phone?”

He didn’t say anything.

“Sean?”

“I will after you go down to breakfast.”

“You’re blackmailing me?”

“I’m just giving you some motivation.”

“No, you’re blackmailing me.” I felt the anger rise up my throat. I didn’t like when people held things over my head. My mom did it with my money for too long.

Sean saw the change in my face. “Babe, I’ll delete it now,” he said quickly. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

I sighed in relief. “Thank you.”

“You know I would never show anyone, right?”

“Yeah.”

“I was just teasing you.”

“You can tease me without the video.”

“You really don’t want to see it before I delete it? It’s pretty hot.”

“No, Sean.”

“You’re missing out.”

“You better not jack off to that.”

“I only jerk off to you, Scarlet. And your panties.”

“Then you shouldn’t have a problem deleting it.”

He grabbed his phone from the nightstand and handed it to me. “You can do the honors.”

I opened it and saw the picture he took of me sleeping. His hand was on my waist and it looked so big in comparison to my small size. My lips were relaxed and my face looked serene. My ring was bright and shiny. When I went to the main screen I saw a collage of pictures of me. He took a new photo of me every morning, making it into a collection. It started as soon as we moved in together. I really was his muse. Sometimes there would be a random picture of something else, like the score of a game or us together at the park, but it was insignificant to all the pictures he had of me. It was stupid for me not to trust him. He would never hurt me. I sighed and handed back the phone. “I trust you, Sean.”

“What does that mean?”

“Delete it. I don’t need to check.” I placed it in his hand then opened my suitcase.

He stared at me for a moment before he tossed the phone on the bed and got ready.

I pulled on a yellow dress that tied around my neck. It had a built in bra and it pushed my breasts together. It reached down to my thighs but was a little loose so it didn’t look to provocative. I only wore it because it looked like the most comfortable thing in the pile.

I combed my hair and fixed the massacre of tangles. I thought about putting on makeup but I didn’t feel like it. It was always heavy and weighted down my face. I only wore it on special occasions. It felt like paste on my face.

When I turned to Sean, he was wearing jeans and a gray shirt. It was tight around his shoulders and chest, but loose around his stomach. His thin hips were noticeable. He was staring at me with a look of longing. He grabbed his phone and pointed it at me.

“Seriously? How many pictures are you going to take?”

“Shut up and smile.”

“I’m not photogenic.”

“My library of pictures says otherwise.”

“I don’t like it when people take pictures of me.”

He lowered the phone. “Fine. I’ll do it when you aren’t watching.”

I rolled my eyes. “I feel like I’m marrying the paparazzi.”

He came behind me then wrapped his arms around my waist. “You look beautiful.” His hands ran down my dress over my thighs. “I like it when you wear dresses. And I love this color on you.”

I leaned my head back and looked at him. “I just wanted to be comfortable.”

“You’re sexy without even trying. That makes you hotter.”

“Even though I’m not wearing any makeup?”

“You look gorgeous without it. Why do you think I always take pictures of you in the morning?” He dropped his hands then grabbed his keys and his wallet. “Now let’s head out.”

I was dreading this. “Oh I forgot something.”

“What?”

“Uh, I need to send an email.”

He grabbed my hand. “Come on.”

I groaned.

We left the room then headed down to the lobby. Across from the bar was the restaurant we were meeting at. Groups of guys and girls were stumbling through the lobby, heading to their rooms after a long night of partying. I wore flat sandals today because I knew I would trip and land on my face in heels. A family came into the lobby and approached the front desk with their suitcases in tow. My first thought was confusion. Why would a family have a vacation here?

Sean guided me into the restaurant and I felt my stomach rise up my throat and land in my mouth. I would hear shit about this all day—no, all year. I couldn’t stand to look at Monnique, knowing what I did.

They were sitting at the table. Cortland and Mike were facing me. When they saw me, both of their faces broke out into a grin. I felt even more uneasy. My face was turning red and I felt the heat flush over my face.

Sean pulled out a chair for me, helping me sit down, then took the seat next to me.

It was absolutely silent. Awkward, I placed my hands in my lap and avoided everyone’s gaze. Monnique sat next to me but she didn’t acknowledge me. Ryan glanced at me a few times but didn’t speak. Janice was slumped in her chair, wearing dark shaded sunglasses even though we were inside. She looked totally hung over.

Cortland
’s smile was stretched wider than I had ever seen it, but that look was nothing compared to Mike’s. He was totally giddy with glee.

“Okay, I know what you all want to talk about, but I
’m just not in the mood so drop it.” I grabbed the menu and looked at it.

“So, is Monnique a better kisser than Sean?” Cortland asked.

I ignored him.

Mike held up his phone. “Hey, Scarlet. I downloaded this song for you and I thought you would like it.” He pressed play and it was a lesbian song by Katy Perry.

“Shut up, both of you.”

Cortland leaned forward. “I always knew men were going to come after my girl, but I never thought I would have to keep an eye on the women too—especially women who I thought were straight.”

“Are you dumping Sean?” Mike asked. “You totally should.”