Love's Destiny (Love Trilogy #2) (17 page)

As soon as my mom called to tell me they’d arrived I headed to their hotel. It was wonderful to see my family again. I felt foolish for having been nervous. Mom and Dad smothered me with hugs and kisses and simply being in my parent’s arms again healed a great deal of the pain that had dominated my days.

Chance had hit a growth spurt and was becoming a tall and lanky pre-teen, it was hard to believe he was only 10 years old when he was very quickly catching up with me in height. Playing baseball had given him a rangy muscular build that hinted at the man he would someday become. And Tyler… I faced him last knowing this was where my anxiety stemmed from. Tyler was as handsome as ever. Tall, broad, muscular, intimidating. His dark brooding eyes met mine and I braced myself for his reaction to me. In three long strides he crossed the room and pulled me to him. He hugged me just like the rest of my family had, but somehow it felt more intimate to be in his arms.

“I missed you at Thanksgiving.” He whispered into my hair as he hugged me tightly.

Relief washed through me as I threw myself into his embrace and realized how safe I felt in his arms. He pulled away and smiled at me in a way that had my heart breaking.

“I missed you too.” I told him choking back a sob “I’m glad you all came.” I said turning to my family.

“It’s so beautiful here!” Mom exclaimed. “I’ve always wanted to see New York at Christmas.”

“You haven’t seen anything yet.” I told her “I’ll have to take you on a tour of the city.”

“I can’t wait! But dinner first.” She insisted and Chance seconded the motion exclaiming that he was starving.

We had a wonderful dinner at a very nice restaurant and it felt so good to be surrounded by my family again. I stayed with them in their hotel suite and we stayed up late into the night talking. I felt like myself for the first time in a month. 

I spent the next several days taking everyone on a tour of the city. I took Chance to Yankee stadium. Took my dad to several art museums and Mom and I spent a whole day in Macy’s doing our Christmas shopping.

Then of course there were the fundamental tourist traps that couldn’t be avoided; the Statue of Liberty, Central Park under a blanket of snow, and Broadway shows. Tyler came along on all of our outings, smiling and participating in conversation without any hint of resentment. Maybe I hadn’t hurt him as badly as I’d feared. It was so good to see him, to see all of them.

Christmas morning we spent in the hotel room exchanging gifts. I gave Tyler an iPod that I’d loaded with my favorite classical music teasing him about broadening his tastes. Although he had purchased gifts for everyone else it didn’t go unnoticed that he had nothing for me. I wondered if I’d been too quick to assume that everything was okay between us. Maybe he was just putting on a happy face for the holidays.

As the family gathered around trying to figure out how to use Chance’s new telescope I wandered over to the window to look out over the city. Tyler joined me quietly and we both gazed out the window in silence for a moment.

“I can see why you love it here.” Tyler said breaking the silence

“It’s an amazing city.” I replied

“I still need to give you your gift, I wanted to do it privately.” He said turn
ing from the window to face me.
I looked up into his eyes and felt a sudden impulse to reach up and touch his face. I didn’t.

“Ok
ay
”

“We’re leaving tomorrow. Maybe you and I could have some time alone tonight.” I could hear the tremor in his voice and realized that despite his confident demeanor he was nervous.

“Sure. You could come back to the dorms with me. I think it’s the only place in New York I haven’t shown you yet.” I laughed hoping I sounded casual and not as nervous as I felt.

“Yeah ok.” He smiled and I felt my heart flutter. It was such a simple thing and something that only Tyler had ever made me feel. Funny I hadn’t realized that until now.

After lunch with the family I told them I was going to take Tyler back to the residence hall with me for a while. Chance jumped up saying he wanted to go too, but Mom quickly intervened telling him no. I was relieved that she stepped in. I had a hard time denying my brother anything, especially when he turned his charming smile on me, but I wanted the alone time with Tyler. I wondered if Mom realized that.

We took a taxi back to my dorm while I pointed out the window still playing tour guide. I realized I was rambling a little, but it was easier than silence. I was suddenly very nervous about being alone with Tyler.

We went up to my room after a brief tour of the first floor. He was impressed with the student lounge and all the amenities. The halls were mostly empty since most students were still gone for the holidays. It reminded me of Thanksgiving and I tried to shake the memory as I led Tyler into my room, but I couldn’t help but look toward the couch where it had happened. I had avoided sitting on that couch ever since. As if avoiding it could repress the horrible memory and the sha
me and guilt that came with it.

Of course that was the couch that Tyler sat on, forcing me to push the memory aside and sit with him. He fidgeted nervously for a minute before reaching into his jacket pocket to pull out a small box.

“Merry Christmas.” He said handing me the box.

My hands trembled as I took it and slowly opened the lid. Inside was a heart shaped gold locket.

“Oh Tyler, it’s beautiful! You shouldn’t have.” I exclaimed pulling the necklace from the box and holding it up to look at it.

“Look inside.” He told me and I opened the clasp to find two pictures inside the locket. One was of me, the other Tyler.

I immediately remembered when the pictures had been taken. It was on the last camping trip our families had taken to the cabin before Tyler had moved to LA. I was 14, he was 12. It had been our last carefree summer as children, before things had changed between us. I wondered if he’d realized that when he’d chosen those pictures.

“I love you Destiny.” Tyler said “But if all we can have is friendship, I’d rather have that than nothing.”

“Oh Tyler.” I said as tears filled my eyes “I don’t know what to say.”

“Just say you’ll be my friend.” He said with strength in his voice that I admired. I could only imagine how hard this was for him.

I was on the verge of telling him that maybe I wanted more too. That maybe there was something more between us. Maybe it was love. But then there was a knock at the door.

Startled I stood up and walked to the door to answer it. It was Jason. I felt all the blood drain from my face and my hands began to tremble.

“What do you want?” I asked my voice quivering.

“Just thought I’d see if you wanted a night out? We had such a good time before.” Jason sneered and I felt faint.

“Maybe you did.” I replied and slammed the door in his face before he could say anything else.

“Who was that?” I hadn’t heard Tyler walk up behind me, but I could feel him there now. My knees felt weak and I was afraid I might faint. I turned around to face Tyler and leaned back against the door for support.

“No one.” I said, my voice trembled, my hands were still shaking.

“No one wouldn’t make you look like you’ve seen a ghost. Who was that Destiny?”

“He was just this guy I went out with a few times, but it was a mistake.” I said trying to calm myself and stop the tears from falling.

“Did he hurt you?” Tyler’s voice was thick with rage and fire flashed in his dark eyes.

“No… yes… I don’t know. I mean, not really.” I could feel the tears threatening to break loose.

“Tell me.” Tyler demanded

I looked up into his eyes prepared to tell him that I was fine, that it was no big deal, but the concern in his eyes broke through releasing the tears I was holding back. I fell into his arms and sobbed against his chest, too weak to resist the comfort I knew I would find there.

He led me over to the couch as I cried and sat me down with his arms still around me. He held me against him in silence while I cried and released all the emotions I’d been bottling up since that horrible night a month earlier. Finally when the tears stopped he pulled me back to look into my face.

“Tell me.” He said again, softer this time.

“It was my fault. I had too much to drink. I shouldn’t have let him…” I trailed off, I just couldn’t say it out loud not even to Tyler. Especially to Tyler.

“Did he hurt you?” he asked again, this time his voice as soft as a whisper.

“Isn’t it supposed to hurt?” I asked with my head down, not able to meet his eyes.

“No.” was all he said then he stood up and walked out the door, leaving me confused and alone in my room.

I was going to kill him. I walked down the streets of New York with one sole purpose. To find him, and kill him. I could hear my pulse throbbing in my ears. My vision was tinted red. My breathing was ragged, but my hands were steady.

Snow fell around me melting against my skin as the wind whipped it into flurries around my face. I didn’t feel the cold.

I had never seen Destiny so terrified. She had been so pale, felt so fragile as she’d cried in my arms. He had hurt her and I was going to kill him for it.

I didn’t know where to find him, but I wouldn’t stop until I had. I walked along the snow-covered streets searching every face I passed. I had seen him at her door. I remembered his face. I would find him.

I thought of Destiny sitting alone in her room, trembling and scared. I was torn. I wanted to go back to her, to hold her, to tell her that nothing was her fault. I wanted to take the pain out of her eyes and soothe her. I wanted to feel her in my arms again. I had come to New York with a plan. I was going to show her that I could be her friend. That I could be what she needed me to be. But it was a lie. I was in love with her. And he’d hurt her. That one thought overrode all others. He would pay for what he’d done to her.

I walked for hours up and down the streets of New York. Finally as I began to think I’d never find him, as I began to consider going back to her that’s when I saw him. He had stumbled out of a bar just a few paces in front of me. He didn’t see me, but I saw him. I followed him. Watched him. He was drunk, he stumbled more than once as he walked along the icy sidewalk. I followed in silence.

Then I saw my chance, an alley was coming up not too far ahead. I sped up my pace so that I was just behind him now. He was too drunk to notice. Just as he stepped off the curb in front of the alley I lunged and knocked him into the shadows. Confused he stumbled forward and fell to his knees.

“Get up.” I said standing over him.

He looked up at me squinting against the snow falling on his face.

“Get up.” I repeated.

“Here take it.” He cried throwing his wallet towards me, it fell by my feet but I didn’t take my eyes from his face.

“I don’t want your money”

“What do you want?” he whimpered

“I want you to pay for what you did. Get up.”

“Who are you?” his voice shook with fear. I thought of the fear I’d heard in Destiny’s voice.

“I’m a friend of Destiny’s.” I told him and I saw the comprehension light in his dull eyes.

“Look” he said struggling to get to his feet “I don’t know what she told you.”

“She didn’t have to tell me anything, I saw it in her face.”

“She wanted it.” He said

“Wrong answer.” I said as I swung out and felt my fist make contact with his face. He crumpled to the ground.

“Get up” I said again taking a step closer. He looked up at me with blood running from his trembling lip.

“Look you know how women are, one minute they’re all over you, and the next they’re pushing you away. It’s not my fault she regretted it the next day. I didn’t force her. She didn’t say no.” he rambled off excuses as he backed away farther into the dark alley.

“She was drunk.” I said stalking after him “You got her drunk.”

“She didn’t say no.” he repeated holding his hands up in defense.

I swung low catching him the gut and he doubled over as his breath whooshed out of him. Then I swung up and caught him square in the jaw knocking him back to the ground. He didn’t get back up this time, just curled into a ball and trembled on the ground.  I stood over him and considered how easy it would be to pound him mercilessly, to release all the rage I felt inside. It was frightening to realize just how easy it would be, and just how much I wanted to. But then I thought of Destiny and wondered what she would think of me if I did. She wouldn’t want me to. I knew that, and now that I was looking down at this pathetic terrified heap I realized that for her I wouldn’t.

“If you ever come near her again.” I threatened. He shook his head vehemently.

“I’ll find you.” I finished and turned around leaving him lying in the cold alley.

I walked back to the Rose building where Destiny lived and stopped outside wondering if she would still be awake. It had been several hours since I’d left her. I remembered how she’d looked as I’d walked out the door. I couldn’t leave without seeing her again.