Authors: Kaylee Ryan
I decide to unleash it all. I tell him about all the “little” moments, the touches, the few kisses that we’ve shared. I tell him about how good Aiden is to me and how he has told me several times since he left that he misses me.
“I just don’t know if he feels that way about me. It’s like one minute he does and the next he’s backing away. I think we’re just really good friends and he likes to flirt,” I explain to Miles.
“What are you afraid of, Hales?” Miles asks quietly.
“What am I afraid of? I’m scared to death that he’s going to reject me. That I will lose one of my best friends because I need more. The four of us, Allison, Liam, Aiden, and I, we’re a tight group. If I pursue him and he rejects me, that’s all going to be jeopardized. I can’t be the one to break up our group. I want him. I’m in love with him, but I can’t risk losing him and what we have. I won’t. Besides, I’m just his best friend’s little sister, he doesn’t want me.”
“Maybe he’s afraid of what your brother will say,” he suggests.
I laugh. “Liam has no leg to stand on with that one. Allison was my best friend and roommate before she got with my brother. Aiden also considers her to be his little sister, so Liam can’t be angry.”
“Do you want to hear what I think?” he waits for my reply. I simply nod my head. “I think you’re making excuses. You have yourself convinced that you are and will always be just a little sister to him, and as a guy, I can assure you that he sees you. I don’t know what’s holding him back, but it’s my guess that it’s the same thing that’s holding you back. He’s probably afraid to break up the group if things don’t work out. I think you’re both letting fear of the unknown run your life.”
“I need him to be a part of my life,” I whisper into the night.
Miles is off his swing and crouched down in front of me in no time. “You can’t live life in fear. You have to live and take chances. I suggest you tell this Aiden character how you feel. Tell him that if he doesn’t feel the same way, you can go on as if the conversation never happened. He could be it for you, and you for him. You have to take the chance, Hales.”
“Maybe…maybe I will. I need to think about what you’ve said. It makes sense, but I’m still scared shitless to lose him,” I tell him, fighting back tears.
I stepped out of my comfort zone that night and opened up to Miles. Since then, I have also talked to Macie about Aiden, and because Kaden is always around, he knows as well. They all say I need to “take the chance”. Of course, I throw Macie’s words right back at her. All I ever get in return is a smile and an eye roll.
Tonight I’m venturing a little further out of my comfort zone. Macie, Miles, and Kaden are coming over to the condo to watch movies. It’s Friday night and it’s been a long ass week. Macie and I want to unwind, and Kaden usually ends up where Macie is, and Miles where Kaden is, so…I invited all three of them. Actually, all three of them have become really close friends and I would have invited them anyway. I just like to make the guys think that they are lucky to be included.
“So, what do I need to bring tonight?” Macie asks me as we walk to the parking lot.
“Just yourself, unless there is something specific that you want. I am just going to order pizza. I have chips and dip as well as pop and water. If the guys or you want alcohol, you will need to bring that. There needs to be a designated driver, otherwise, you all have to spend the night,” I tell her.
“We would never drink and drive. That’s cool of you to offer us to stay. I’ll let the guys know. So we should be there around seven, sound good?”
“Yes, that’s perfect,” I say as I climb into my Fusion.
I rush home to straighten up and take a quick shower. I stopped at the store last night so that snacks are here. All I need to do is put them out and order the pizza. I miss Allison’s call while I’m in the shower, but I don’t have time to call her back. Everyone will be here in fifteen minutes. I have spent too much time online looking at wedding decorations. I think I’m just as excited as Allie and Liam. I have some ideas for her so I will call her back when we have time to talk.
At seven o’clock on the dot, I hear a knock at the door. I yell for them to come in. Immediately, my mind flashes to Liam and Aiden scolding Allie and I for doing that in our dorm room last year. I guess now that I live alone, that was not exactly the best decision. Note to self, always see who is knocking before saying come in, and keep the door locked.
I’m walking into the living room as they come through the door. Miles has a scowl on his face, as does Kaden.
“Hey, guys!” I say happily. I really am excited to see them.
“Hales, what the hell? You can’t just yell for people to come in, and why the fuck was your door unlocked? You live alone, you need to keep that shit locked and always see who it is first,” he scolds me.
I smile.
“This is not funny. What if it was some madman at the door,” he asks angrily.
“I’m sorry, Miles. I’m not laughing at you. Liam and Aiden yelled at me for that same thing. You just reminded me of them, that’s all,” I say, sliding my arm through his and leading him to the couch.
I push Miles down onto the couch and Kaden plops down next to him. “Nice pad, Hales.”
“Thanks. Here are the movies, or we could play Bullshit? Not sure if you guys are into cards?” I ask them.
“I also brought Battle of the Sexes,” Macie says, sitting down on the recliner.
My cell phone rings, causing me to jump. I reach for it at the same time as Miles. I end up losing my balance. Miles reaches out, grabs me, and pulls me onto his lap, breaking my fall.
“He-hello?” I say, laughing.
“Hales? What’s so funny?” Allison asks on the other end.
“Nothing,” I say, still laughing. “Miles, stop it,” I scold him.
“What? I’m not doing anything,” he says, laughing at me.
“Hales, who is that? Is there a guy there?” she asks, surprised.
“What? No, I mean yes. It’s just Miles. He Macie and Kaden are over just hanging out. I think I’m going to kick their asses in a game of Bullshit,” I tell her.
“Bullshit!” Kaden yells.
All four of us bust out laughing. For some reason, we are all slaphappy tonight.
“Well, it sounds like ya’ll are having fun. Call me tomorrow. I have some appointments booked I want to tell you about,” she says.
“You can tell me now, we’re just hanging out,” I reply.
“No, you have company and it sounds like this Miles character is torturing you.” She laughs.
“He won’t stop tickling me,” I say as I try to squirm away from Miles.
“Miles, st-stop it. Please, I have to pee,” I cry.
Allison laughs. “Call me tomorrow, girl. I love you.”
“Love you too, Allie. I’ll talk to you in the morning,” I say before hitting end on my cell.
I finally have both hands free to maneuver myself out of Miles’s grasp. “You’re evil,” I say, running down the hall.
I really have to pee!
Two weeks. It been two fucking weeks since I’ve seen Hailey. Two weeks without her smile, her silly jokes. Two long fucking weeks.
It’s Friday night and the official end of our first week of training camp. My ass is dragging and so is Liam. Allison has been great. She is taking care of our tired asses. I’m stretched out on the loveseat while Allie and Liam are on the couch. Liam and I both decided that it hurts to move, so we don’t.
I hear Liam chuckle. “What’s so funny?” I ask him.
He laughs. “I feel like an old man. Here we are just graduated from college, and a night in on the couch is what we’ve been longing for,” he tells me.
“Fuck, don’t I know it. I don’t want to move until I have to,” I reply.
“Oh, you two, you’re not old. Training camp for the NFL, that’s huge. Of course you’re going to be tired,” Allison reasons.
“Did you get any appointments scheduled today?” Liam asks her. He has been hounding her every day to get the wedding planned. He told her to make it her dream wedding. All he needed was her. She and Hailey have been talking every night, planning. It’s good to see her happy.
“Yes, actually I did. Crap! I forgot to call Hailey.” She reaches for her phone on the coffee table.
I’m missing Hailey so much that I tune in on her conversations with Allison just to get a glimpse of what’s going on in her life. She and I have texted a lot over the past two weeks and even talked a time or two, but nothing like the night I fell asleep with her. I haven’t slept good since that night.
I can only hear one side of the conversation, but my interest is piqued when I hear Allison ask Hailey if there is a guy there with her. I sit up straight on the loveseat and stare at Allison. She has a smile on her face, so Hales must be okay with this guy being there. Who the fuck is he? Why is he with Hales? There are a million questions and scenarios running through my mind.
Allison calls the guy Miles. Who. The. Fuck. Is. Miles? She tells Hales to call her tomorrow and she loves her, and then hangs up.
“What’s up with Hales?” Liam asks her.
Thanks, buddy, I owe you one. It’s easier for him to ask the questions than me. They are both already suspicious of me and my feelings for Hailey.
Allison smiles. “Macie, the girl she met in class, and her brother are there. Miles was tickling her so much she couldn’t stop laughing.”
“Does she know these people that well? She must trust them if she’s letting them come over and he’s tickling her to death,” Liam says calmly.
How the fuck is he calm about this? We don’t know this dude and neither does Hailey. How do we know she’s safe? I stand up because sitting just isn’t working for me. My temper and my emotions are on high alert.
I’m pacing back and forth behind the couch and running my fingers through my hair. I look at my watch. It’s seven thirty. If I leave now, I can be there before eleven. I stalk to my room, grab my keys, wallet, and phone. I make my way to the front door and have just slipped my shoes on when I feel a heavy hand land on my shoulder.
“What’s up, man? Going somewhere?” Liam asks me.
Shit!
How do I explain this? This need to keep her safe. How do I explain the ache that resides in my chest that grows more prominent each day that I’m away from her? How do I tell my best friend that I’m head over heels for his little sister?
“She doesn’t know them, Liam. What if they try to hurt her? We’re not there. We just left her alone. I’m going to drive up there and make sure she’s okay,” I tell him. Hoping he doesn’t see right through me.
“Aiden, Hailey is smart. She would never intentionally put herself in that position. Allison said she was laughing and having a good time,” he tries to reason with me.
“What if-” he cuts me off.
“Look, why don’t you call her first. That way you can hear her tell you herself that she’s okay,” he suggests.
I don’t answer him. I turn around and track back to my room. I close myself inside and hit speed dial for Hailey.
It rings twice before I hear her voice. “Aiden?” she says in question.
I suck in a breath at my name on her lips. “Angel.”
“What’s wrong? Is everyone okay?” she asks me, concern lacing her voice.
“Yeah. I was…” I clear my throat. I feel like I can’t breathe. “I was just worried about you,” I croak out.
“Worried about me? Why?” Confusion evident in her tone.
I gulp a couple deep breaths and try to calm down. “Allison said there was a guy over, and well, that’s not like you and I was worried…I’m worried about you, angel,” I say softly.
Hailey doesn’t say anything, so I keep going. “I have my shoes on, keys in hand, and Liam stopped me. I was coming to you. Liam said that Allie said you were fine and I should call you and hear for myself,” I pause. She still says nothing, but I can hear her breathing on the other end. “Do you need me, angel? I can be there tonight,” I say, willing her to say yes, she does need me.
She clears her throat. “Aiden, I’m fine really. Miles and Kaden are great guys. They would never hurt me,” she says quietly.
Two guys! What the fuck? I struggle to remain in control of my emotions. “Miles and Kaden?” I question.
“Yes. Miles is Macie’s twin brother and Kaden is his best friend. They actually remind me a lot of you and Liam,” she says.
If she’s trying to make me feel better, she’s not. If they are anything like me, they want her. Want her so much that it hurts to breath when she’s not around. I don’t feel like I have truly taken a breath in two long weeks.
Trying to reel myself in, I ask again “You’re okay?”
“I’m fine,” she whispers.
“Okay, but if you change your mind, if you need me, I’ll be there. Please, call me before you go to sleep. I need to know your safe,” I tell her honestly.
“Okay, I will. I really am fine.”
“All right, then. Have a good time, be safe. I’ll be waiting to hear from you.”
“Talk to you soon,” she says and the line goes dead.
I sit there on the edge of my bed and replay our conversation. She really did sound fine to me. It hits me that I totally freaked out in front of Liam. He has to be wondering what the fuck is wrong with me. At this point in the game, I don’t really care if he knows. I’m ready to risk it all just to be with her. I know for a fact, with everything in me, that if Hailey ever truly becomes mine, I will make damn sure that she never wants to leave me. I will do whatever it takes to keep her in my life. The question is…am I too late?