Never Say Goodbye (17 page)

I watch Luke as he drives my
car; his hair floats softly in the wind as his fingers tap my white steering wheel. He lifts my hand from my lap and kisses the top of it gently. He keeps hold of my hand until he has to turn a corner. Wait, where are we?
    
"Luke…" I ask.
    
"Mhmmm…"
    
"Where are we going?" He turns to face me briefly and shrugs.
    
"I told you, baby. My home."
    
"But, we're going the wrong way."
    
"No, we're not." He smiles from the corner of his mouth and laughs gently.
    
"Oh my God. We're going to your parent’s house aren't we?"
    
"My dad's house, yes." He grabs my hand again and plays with my fingers softly.
    
"Where's your-"
    
"Dead." He answers firmly.
    
"Oh, I'm sorry." I whisper.
    
"Don't be stupid, Ellie, wasn't your fault was it?" He gives me a reassuring smile as we reach a very large home.
    
"Whoa." I whisper as he stops my car in front of two very large metal gates.
He smiles and shakes his head at me as he leans up to retrieve a remote from his back pocket. He presses in a code and the gates open. He drives the car slowly along the white graveled road, which makes sufficient crunching noises beneath us.

"Can you stop looking at my house like you want to make love to it?" Luke asks, his arms crossed over his broad chest as he leans against my car. I turn to look at him and smile softly. His head is bowed slightly and he's staring at me through those little strands of hair that rest so perfectly on his forehead.
    
I walk over to him and he instantly wraps his arms around my waist, like I’m his and only his. I put my arms around his neck and grin a huge beaming grin.
    
"You have beautiful eyes, Luke." I murmur and he looks away from me. I turn his chin back so that he's facing me and drop my fingers down his cheek gently. "You have beautiful eyes, Luke." I repeat and he kisses me softly. "Why can you not take compliments?" I ask.
    
"It's nothing, Ella. Come on, let's go inside." He weaves his fingers through mine and opens the large wooden door. When he pulls me in, I look around at the beauty surrounding me.
    
"Wow, Luke! This place is beautiful!" He rolls his eyes at me and a large St Bernard comes bounding for us.
    
"Hey, Missy!" Luke fusses over the dog and squats to its level. I keep on my invasion and have a look around. There is a large grand staircase in front of me that splits in the middle, leading to two opposite staircases.
    
"Luke! Where have you been? I needed someone to help me move my trampoline!" A small girl appears, her feet stomping across the white tiled floor, she stops in front of Luke, arms crossed over her chest.
    
"Hush now, little lady, we have company." Luke nods over in my direction and I give her a small wave.
    
"Oh, hey! Are you, Ella?" She asks sweetly.
    
"Yeah, I am." I say and look over at Luke. His family knows me. It warms some little part of me that was cold and I feel it set alight.
    
"You're very pretty." Her arms are swaying side to side and her eyes pierce mine with a beautiful emerald shine. Just like Luke's. Her long brown hair stops at her waist and she pushes it behind her back.
    
"As are you…?"
    
"Isabella." She states firmly, proudly.
    
"Oh, is that so?" I say, my gaze firmly locked on Luke. He shies away and pretends to deal with Missy. I squat down to look little Isabella in the eye and wave her to come closer. She comes willingly and I whisper in her ear. She opens her mouth in shock and turns to Luke.
    
"Why didn't you tell me your girlfriend has the same name as me!" She stomps her feet again and I return to standing. She groans and walks away.
    
"She's so cute." I mutter as Luke takes me around my waist. He swoops me down slowly and I giggle. He pulls me back up gently.
    
"Why couldn't I have met you sooner?" He asks, as he tucks a loose tendril of hair behind my ear. He releases me and I pull my hoody over my head.
    
"Here, take this. I don't want your dad seeing me in a rock bands hoody." I shove it in his hands.
    
"Don't be stupid, lady, I don't care what you wear. We're not judgmental in this house!" says a voice from behind. I turn and I'm faced with a black suit. I look up and smile at the man.
    
"Luke's dad, Peter, but you can call me Pete. It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Ella." He pulls me toward him and kisses my cheek.
    
"You too." I mutter and quickly grab Luke's hand.
    
"Hey, Dad." Luke says and shoves his hands into his jean pockets.
Er hello? Can I have your hand
back, safety net?
    
"Luke, can you tidy that room of yours, seriously?" His dad rolls his eyes and smiles warmly at me. He pulls out his cell phone from his pocket. I didn't even here it ring. "Excuse me." He holds his finger up and walks away, his shoes clacking against the tiles.
    
"Your dad seems cool." I shrug, my legs swaying backwards and forwards on my heels.
    
"Yeah, he's alright I guess. I just…" He shakes his head and grabs my hand. "Come on, I want to show you my room." He winks at me and it makes me blush.
    
His room is so unexpected; so different from his room at the Madison. His walls are covered in posters, displaying many different rock bands.
    
"Erm, Luke!" I say, slapping his arm. "Why didn't you tell me you like Guns 'N Roses?" I point to the photo of Axl Rose. He's leant forward, his arms held onto a microphone and screaming some amazing lyric through it. Luke walks over to the far end of the room where there is an electric guitar sitting on its stand. I walk over, my mouth open in shock. I mentally punish myself and close it.
    
"Can you play?" I ask.
    
"Yeah." He replies and shrugs. He picks up the guitar, plugs it into an amp, and sits on his bed. I take a seat on the cozy rug on his floor and cross my legs beneath me.
    
"I wanna listen." I grin at him and he gives me a grin back.
Oh man, that smile. Those arms.
Just…just him.
    
He places the guitar strap over his shoulder and pulls his plectrum from the strings.
He starts to strum and the room fills with Guns 'N Roses 'Sweet Child Of Mine.' I honestly think I've died and gone to heaven. He starts to sing the lyrics softly and I join in.
He cautiously puts the guitar back and holds his arms out to me. I jump up and squeal loudly. I tackle him down to the bed and pin his hands either side of his head, lacing his fingers with mine. I
lower my face to his and gently graze my nose along his.
    
"That was the sexiest thing, I have ever seen." He smirks softly and rolls his eyes.
    
"Oh really?" He says, his bottom lip caught in his teeth. I look down at him in awe and groan softly, letting go of his hands.
    
"Okay, that's sexy too." His fingers slowly graze under my tank top; he lifts it up slightly, his hands skimming my ribs.
    
"You're so beautiful, Ellie, my girl."
    
"Your girl?" I ask, my left eyebrow raised.
    
"My girl." He whispers and cups the back of my head bringing my lips to his.

******

Soft guitar playing. Soft singing. Huh?
I open my eyes slowly and Luke is sitting across the room from me, playing his acoustic guitar softly, and looking at me. I keep hidden so he doesn't think I'm awake. He stops playing and puts the guitar against his wall.
Nickelback
.
I prop up onto my elbows much to his surprise and smile at him.
    
"Hey, did I wake you?"
    
"Yeah." I rub my head. "Sorry, it’s my meds always making me sleepy. Oh, and someone was making noise." I smile at him and he sighs. He squats down next to the bed and holds my hand. He looks down at it and then back up to me. He strokes some hair from my face and he looks troubled.
    
"Luke, what's wrong?" He swallows twice and looks to the floor.
    
"She died three years ago. Bella was one. I was, well y'know…caught up in high school shit. She had…cancer, the one that, women get, ovarian. She didn't know until it was too late." He gulps and I press my lips to his forehead. He smiles softly.
    
"She was an angel, my mom. She always found the good in someone, even if all the good was evil. My dad lost it the day we all found out. He left for three weeks, went to L.A or somewhere and drank himself stupid." He shakes his head at the memory and his green eyes look unfamiliarly dark, sad. "My mom still looked after us. She...she…still made us breakfast." His last word is a whisper and as the first tear falls, I jump to the floor and scoop him up into my arms. He holds me close and cries into my shoulder. I let him cry all he wants. I know that pain. The pain of losing someone who meant everything one day and the next they were gone.

Vanished.
    
"Luke, you will see her again, she hasn't really left. She's here right now." He moves his head from my shoulder and I cup his cheeks. His eyes have gone a bright green, filled with raw emotion. "She's here, baby, she loves you. She's helped us find each other. Two souls not destined to see any future together, but here we are..." I let out a soft giggle and shrug. "Loving each other." I wipe the tears from his cheeks and kiss his beautiful, soft lips carefully, as if not to break him.
    
"We're here together through our sadness. These people helped us. Call me stupid but that's how I see it. Right now, all I can feel is strength. Me and you." He looks down and his sobs come rushing back.
    
"But…Ella..." He sniffs slightly and kisses my forehead. "I'm leaving you. I'm going away."
    
"Yes…but…" I lift his chin up to so his eyes meet mine. "I'm still alive. Wherever we are, I'll be breathing somewhere. I won't be lost. One day you can see my face again. That's the beauty of us. You will still find me.
I know you will.
" He holds me tightly and we fall deeper into a dream, both of us picturing the moment we see each other again.

******

"Come on." He whispers and pulls me to my feet. "I have a surprise for you."
We drive for a little while, his fingers laced with mine. Every few minutes he kisses my hand, sometimes nibbling on my fingers softly. When he parks my Mustang, we are at my bridge. I haven't been here in ages. I stare at him intently and he comes around to the passenger side and opens my door. He bows and I laugh.
    
"Now, you have to close your eyes, m’lady."
    
"Erm, really?"
    
"Yes, Ellie, close your eyes." I comply and bat my arms against my sides.
"So moody." He whispers in my ear and places his hands across my eyes from behind. "Follow my lead." He guides me down the steps to the tunnel under the bridge.
Our first kiss.
He stops and takes his hands away from my eyes.
    
"Open your eyes, baby." I open them and gape in awe. I turn to face him and laugh. I run to him and leap into his arms, my legs around his waist.
    
"It's beautiful." I squeal excitedly and let him go. He has transformed the small tunnel; it has fairy lights hanging from the ceiling and a small picnic blanket on the floor with a picnic basket. Rose petals delicately forming a small path across the concrete.
    
"So, you like it?" he asks, grinning with obvious pride.
    
"Luke, it's beautiful." He grabs my hand and leads me over to the perfect picnic he has created.
    
"Wait, how did you do this?" I ask, gently pulling away from him.
    
"Ah, well, that's for me to know and you to find out." He pulls me flush against him as his hand holds the nape of my neck.
"So beautiful." He whispers and kisses me lustfully. He tears himself away for a second and sighs hard, his hands still holding me tightly.
    
"Ellie, wherever I will be, believe it, baby, I will be thinking of you. I can't believe how much I love you." He stops and gestures with his head for me to look around the tunnel.
"This is for us, something to remember, to look back on. Anytime that we are apart, baby, promise me that when you close your eyes, you'll be here, right here with me. We will be here in this moment. I know I'm going to see you again. Just don't forget, Ellie. A part of us will always be together. My dreams of you will haunt me. They'll chase me every night until I see you again." He kisses away my tears that are dropping softly down my cheeks. "Always sad, my beautiful lady, don't cry."
    
"I'm just going to miss you." I whisper.
    
"I know, likewise, you're my sunshine."
    
"My only sunshine." I whisper and he pulls me down to the blanket.
    
"Luckily for us, it's quite warm tonight. I've been planning on this since we had that argument." He shakes his head. "Anyway." He opens up the classic wicker picnic basket and offers me a sandwich.
    
"What's in it? I ask looking down at the white bread.
    
"Well, don't get mad, but I told your parents about tonight." I stop looking at my sandwich and frown at him.
    
"Hey! No getting mad at me, I did it so I could find out your favorite sandwich…and so I could create this memory with you." I smile and take a bite of my sandwich.
    
"I'll let you off then. Well, just as always, it's made correctly... did my mom help you?"
    
"To make a chip sandwich? Are you kidding?" I giggle at him and he laughs back at me. "You're so adorable. I'll miss that." He plays with his juice box and takes a sip from the straw.
    
"This isn't going to be fun. Also, did you get matching stuff for your suit for prom?" He raises his eyebrows at me.
    
"Stuff?" He asks, a huge grin spread across his beautiful mouth. He pops in a pretzel and I frown.
    
"I don't know what it's called. Bowtie? I don't know."
    
"I got a cummerbund yes."
    
"What the hell is a 'cummerbund'?"
    
"It goes around your waist." He gestures around his lower stomach at where it goes. I nod in agreement.
    
"You got blue, yes?"
    
"Yes, baby, I got blue." He shakes his head. "So adorable."
We sit for a few hours, talking, breathing, and loving each other the way we are meant to. He told me his life plans and how long he will be studying at Princeton. I told him about my life ambitions, mainly about working somewhere that involves writing. I couldn't help but watch every single gesture. Every moment, so I didn't forget. I watched the way his mouth would curve into a smile every time I touched him. How he would gently swipe stray strands of hair from his forehead. The way his body filled his clothes, his biceps bulging firmly as he offered me a cupcake. I watched how his eyebrow raised when he was joking around with me. The way his fingers perfectly laced with mine.
    
"Come on, baby, time to go." He whispers, my head on his lap. His fingers stoke my head softly.
    
"I don't want to. I want to stay here, in your arms. Remembering."
    
"Me too." He held me for a while longer and I fall asleep in his arms.