Nick and Lilac (12 page)

“Knowing is different from…
not hurting.
” She paused, trying to find the best words to use for her next question.

Lilac glanced up, and the look on Jilly’s face told Lilac the question that Jilly couldn’t make herself ask. She said quietly, “Jilly…I’m not…in love with Nick.”

“Yet. You’re not in love with him yet, but you could be – if you let yourself.”

Lilac lowered her gaze, not wanting Jilly to see the truth she feared was in her eyes, and it was something she couldn’t admit to herself as well.

Jilly said in a pained voice, “He was really in love with her, Lil. I don’t know why, I really don’t understand what he saw in her but she was his world, the sun, the moon, the stars – and you just can’t compete with that.”

“I don’t want…to compete.” Lilac took hold of her book again, needing to do something with her hands so that they wouldn’t shake.

“Good, because I’m telling you – it’s not going to work. I saw them together. I spent so much time with them – and maybe the others didn’t see it, but Lilac…” Jilly stopped, her heart already breaking at what she was about to say but knowing there was no getting around it. “He needed Karla back then like he needed air to breathe, and I’m afraid if she comes back…he’ll leave you without a backward glance.”

Lilac gripped her book more tightly, staring down at it to stem the tears that she didn’t want to fall. “I’m just…his friend.”

“But you want to be more and I know it!”

Lilac shook her head. She closed her eyes, pictured Nick and Karla together, and the image seared her mind, the hurt unimaginable. How much more would it hurt if it was true – if she did see them together in real life?

“Lilac, Nick isn’t---”

“---going to…hurt me.” With those words, Lilac made a choice, turning her back on her fears and what her every instinct was telling her. Lilac said quietly, “We’re…friends. That’s…all.”

****

“Nick!” Lilac’s heart jumped in her chest when Nick came out of the blue the moment she went past the doors of the library.

The sight of Lilac eased the restlessness of his heart, made him feel less empty, the burden on his shoulders less heavy. He stepped forward, closing the distance between them, and he felt even better. She mattered that much to him, Nick thought. And right now, she was his only defense against the past.

When Nick smiled at her, Lilac’s heart jumped again, for a very different reason. It worried her, especially after everything that Jilly said.

“I’ve been waiting for your nanny to leave.”

She couldn’t help but laugh a little at that. Jilly could double as a princess, a model, but never anything as homely as a nanny.

“What did you two talk about?”

She shook her head.

“She warned you away from me?” Nick’s voice was very, very cool.

Lilac cocked her head to the side. “And if…she did?”

“Then Jilly and I have a problem.” There was nothing compromising about his tone. “I didn’t go through all the trouble of getting you back in my life just to have you taken away from me again.”

She sighed, but a helpless smile was playing on her lips. “Selfish,” she chided.

“I told you I was from the very start.”

She shook her head. “Arrogant
and
selfish.” But her smile had also widened a little.

Nick tipped her chin up, surprising Lilac. “Whatever she said, whether you think it’s true or not…it doesn’t – shouldn’t – erase what happened between us yesterday.”

He cupped her face, uncaring of who would see them and what they would think. All he cared about was keeping Lilac in his life. “We’re still friends,” he said fiercely.

Slowly, Lilac nodded, responding more to the urgency in his voice than his words. Her heart twisted at the darkness in his gaze. She knew, from the very start, that she wanted Nick Christakos to need her. But…not like this, not with him looking like he was walking at the edge of an emotional cliff.

For a moment, she wished she could be Karla, just so she could make Nick’s world right again. But she couldn’t. She wasn’t. Right now, she knew that the only thing she could do was…be herself.

So she stepped back.

Nick wanted to curse but he let his hands fall, forcing himself to keep still even though every part of him wanted to pull Lilac closer, to keep her as his anchor against losing control. And his control was tenuous at best now, had been so ever since Jilly told him that Karla was leaving Davos for good.
Karla. Karla. Karla.
The name was a tormenting beat that drummed endlessly inside his mind.

He turned to Lilac almost desperately. “Lilac…we’re fucking friends, right?” He held his breath, wondering what he would do if she said they were not.

But instead she smiled, and it was so beautiful, it made his heart slam against his chest. The drumming of Karla’s name inside his brain gradually receded.

Her pale violet eyes sparkling, Lilac started to speak with painstaking care. “I promised…remember? I want to be…your friend. And so…as your friend…I think what…you need now is…” She cocked her head to the side. “…a game of Farmville? So you’ll…feel good? I’ll let you…harvest my…”

Strong fingers wrapped around her wrist, and then she was in the shelter of his arms. He was hugging her so tightly she could barely breathe. Everyone was looking at them now, but he didn’t seem to notice.

“Lilac,” Nick whispered.

“Yes?” His tentative tone made Lilac anxious.

 “If you really want to make me feel good, we could pretend again, but this time I’d be in the tub and you’d be standing in front of me---”

“Nick!” She pulled back to gape at him even as her insides turned to jelly and laughter was threatening to spill from her lips. His words had her feeling more than a little scandalized but unfortunately, she was more than a little turned on by them, too.

He chuckled against her hair, but his voice was harsh when he said, “Promise you won’t leave me, Lilac.”

“I’ll do more…than that.” She laid a hand against his fast-beating heart. “I promise…I won’t ever…hurt…you.”

The Eleventh Encounter

Pandemonium erupted in the Greek offices of Christakos Industries on a bright Monday morning, with everyone from maintenance to executive managers walking on eggshells.

Nick threw the local tabloid into the trash, jaw clenched hard. He closed his eyes, but it was no use, his photographic memory a curse that forced him to recall in minute detail the content of today’s headlines.

The 23-year-old beauty showed up for the tell-all with dark glasses. When she took them off, we were shocked at the huge discolored bruises circling her eyes.

“Yes, someone beat me.” Karla Niall’s tone was flat as she confirmed our suspicions. “If you want a name, you’ll be surprised – it’s Davos, my ex-fiancé.”

He jammed his finger on the buzz button and his PA came to his office right away, a fifty-something no-nonsense woman who was easily smarter than most businessmen he spoke to. “I assume you know what our problem is?”

Eleanor raised a brow. “And I assume you know what my stand about it is?” She paused. “As well as your family’s?”

Ignoring that, he said, “Expect calls from the press – give them the boilerplate message for I-don’t-give-a-fuck. Call my P.A. too – I want to talk to him once I arrive at the States.”

“Understood,” Eleanor answered briskly. Although her face remained bland, inside she was furious on her employer’s behalf. After all these years, that slutty ex-fiancée of Nick Christakos was again making trouble. She had seen how Karla Niall wrecked her employer’s life and had privately celebrated their separation over dinner with Nick’s mother.

“Call McCarthy and have him ready the plane – I want to fly out immediately.”

The restlessness on Nick’s face was familiar, and Eleanor did her best to swallow words of advice that she knew her employer wouldn’t welcome. She had seen that look plenty on times before. It hinted of Nick’s inner struggle, often over something that he was against doing but Karla was insisting on.

“Would that be all?” Eleanor asked.

Nick visibly hesitated. “Call my brother’s P.A. as well. See if he’s free for dinner tomorrow night.”

When Eleanor left with a loud disapproving sigh – the old dragon never did master keeping her opinion to herself – Nick remained on his feet, striving to control his spiraling emotions.

Karla was hurt. Karla was hurt like him. Karla ---needed him.

Just the thought was enough to change something inside him, reshaping him from within, melding together the pieces that he had thought was forever lost.

He took out his phone and sent her a message.

Call if you need me.

That should be fine. He wasn’t being needy by telling her that. This time, Karla needed him – this time he wouldn’t fail her.

Karla sent him a message back.

No.

And just like that, he broke from within once more. 

****

Stavros Agne, one of CI’s senior managers, stepped out of the elevator on the executive floor with his daughter-slash-secretary following behind. In Greece, nepotism was better known as family loyalty, a practice believed to guarantee respect of the hierarchy rather than discrimination.

A sobbing woman rushed past them on their way to the CEO’s office. Stavros gave his daughter a blank look. “What the hell?”

Emily rolled her eyes. “Don’t you read the news?”

Taking into account the fact that Emily was in her early twenties, wore mint green nail polish to work, and had Nick Christakos’ topless photo as the screensaver on her office computer, he said dryly, “Probably not
your
kind of news.”

She sighed. “It just became official this morning. Karla Niall’s no longer engaged.”

Stavros almost stumbled. “Nick Christakos’ ex-fiancée, the supermodel?”

“None other.”

“So why is he pissed? Isn’t that something to be happy about?”

She gave him a pitying look. “Really, Dad---”

He winced at the term, wishing for the millionth time that his little Emily wasn’t so obsessed with being Americanized. There was nothing great about being brash – like Karla Niall.

“---according to
US Weekly
, she was Davos’ favorite punching bag the entire time they were together.”

“I still don’t see what it has to do with Christakos. She
cheated
on him first.”

“No, no, you’re mistaken. Karla Niall left Nick Christakos because he couldn’t commit.” Seeing the look of incredulity on her father’s face, she added, “He was
devastated
when she left him, remember, Dad? It was all over the news then. So this is very romantic – he’s furious because she’s hurt. So now I bet he’s going after her and this time they’ll have
the
wedding of the century.”

She started to say more, but her father suddenly shook his head, an indication for her to be silent. The next thing she knew, the full retinue of Nick Christakos’ security detail was walking past them, with their chiseled-jawed CEO at the head, a rigid look on his face.

She and her father immediately bowed their heads, a traditional show of respect that even Emily had been raised to practice.

When the elevator doors closed, she told Stavros smugly, “I’m telling you, Dad. He’s going after her. She’s his first love. He won’t be able to help it.”

****

The dressmaker’s establishment was far from empty since it was still within the day’s fashionable hour to shop. She bit her lip, standing next to the entrance, more than a little overwhelmed at the sight of rows upon rows of bolts of cloths, a rainbow selection of silks, satins, and velvets. Then there was also an assortment of every accessory a lady could want – gloves, stockings, hats, bonnets - oh, they were all so very pretty!

They made her wonder, not for the first time, if she was in her right mind to do this.

“Mademoiselle Lilia?”

She glanced up, startled to hear her voice and startled even more to see it was Madame Gertrude herself, the most celebrated French modiste in London. “I…I…”

“You have come to look for a most beautiful gown, yes?”

She nodded.

Madame smiled. “Then I am honored you have chosen my establishment. This is your first time to shop on your own?”

She nodded again.

“Even more exciting,” the older woman murmured. “Please follow me, mademoiselle.” They walked past other ladies, many of them wearing vexed expressions on their faces for none of them had warranted such special attention from the owner.

The dressmaker murmured in French, “Do not mind them, my dove. They are only jealous of you.” She led Lilia to a cushioned seat with a white beautifully carved back and armrests.

Lilia repeated blankly, “Jealous?”

The dressmaker laughed. “Of course, my dove, they are jealous – it is all over London, you know.” As she spoke, a lovely blond girl in a serviceable gray gown served tea to Lilia, who accepted it with thanks, thinking absently that the girl was too pretty to be a seamstress.

“We find it so very romantic, how the duke has come after you in Bath, leaving London in the height of the Season – ooh la-la!” Madame Gertrude let out a gusty sigh. “I am just delighted, simply delighted, to see the duke in love once more and this time with a girl who truly deserves him.”

Lilia almost dropped the tea cup she held in her hands. “In love,” she whispered, “---once more?”

Madame Gertrude stilled, face paling at Lilia’s look of shock. “You do not know?”

Slowly, she shook her head. “I suppose…everyone knows but me.”

“Excuse me, ma’am, but you have a phone call,” a deferential voice suddenly murmured from behind, snapping Lilac out of her daydream. Oh, and just when it had started to get good and juicy!

Unfortunately, she wasn’t the only one that was surprised.

Looking up, Lilac saw that forty heads had also swiveled toward the voice, including the professor’s. The silence that followed was so thick someone’s jaw dropping would probably have been audible.

Lilac wanted to shrink in her seat.
Maybe if she pretended not to hear Baxter---

“Ms. York? It’s Nick Christakos.”

This time, the silence disappeared under the buzz of whispers.

She wanted to knock her head against the desk.
Really, Nick – really?

“I’m…in…class.” She tried saying it as quietly as she could without looking at the bodyguard Nick had assigned to her, a forty-something gay– Nick had told her only
gay
bodyguards could be placed in her detail –who was supposed to prevent her from becoming a target of kidnapping.

Baxter could understand the predicament the young woman was in. And really, he did feel bad for her. In the week he had been tailing the quietly charming Lilac York, Baxter had realized several things: One – she was a genuinely nice girl, probably the nicest one the billionaire had ever spent time with, maybe even too nice for someone like Nick Christakos.
She was nice
, Baxter thought, but she also had the oddest choice in clothes, as if it was her burning desire to hide her innate beauty behind a sense of fashion that only the blind would appreciate, precisely because they wouldn’t be able to see how hideous it was.

Two – it was only a matter of time before the girls around Lilac York would blow a fuse and try doing something shitty to his charge. Baxter would bet his life on it. They were too jealous, and Lilac too naïve. It was the worst combination.

And lastly, three – at the end of the day, Nick Christakos was his employer. From day one, Baxter had understood without Nick saying a thing about his main role in Lilac’s life. It wasn’t just to keep her safe. It was to keep Lilac York the property of Nick Christakos.

And right now, the billionaire wanted him to make a show of it.

Baxter leaned forward, and without making the slightest attempt to lower his voice, he told Lilac in a quiet inflectionless voice, “Mr. Christakos says he must talk to you now.”

Lilac opened her mouth to protest, but Professor Byrne was already assuring her hastily, “You may answer it, Miss York. I have been informed by the school board that you might be accepting emergency calls once in a while.”

The professor’s words only made Lilac want to disappear even more.

Professor Byrne pulled on his collar, looking even more nervous when Lilac still hadn’t spoken. “Really, Ms. York, it won’t be a problem. Please take your call.”

Seeing that the professor looked like he was about to have a heart attack if she didn’t take the call, Lilac stood up. Face pink at the upheaval Nick’s call had just caused, she mumbled her excuses and left the classroom, Nick’s bodyguard in tow.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled to Baxter. She waved a hand to herself. “This position…”

Baxter smiled. “It’s my pleasure to serve, Ms. York.” He handed her the phone.

She took it. She also took a deep breath, preparing to rant at him and tell Nick that what he had just done was inexcusable.

“I need you, Lilac.”

Her heart nearly burst out of her chest at his words, her anger dissipating in a flash at the thread of urgency in Nick’s driven tone.

“But you’re…in Greece.” He had told her he would be away for a few days because of his work and that he wouldn’t be home until Friday. Even now, the fact that he had told her his schedule – without being asked – blew her away.

“No, I’m already here outside uni.” There was an uneven pause. “Will you come out, sweetheart?”

She hesitated, not because she didn’t want to cut classes but because she didn’t want to make it easier for Nick Christakos to cut out her heart when this was all over.

“Lilac?”

Silence answered him. He checked his phone, saw that the call was still ongoing. “Lilac?” Had she hung up on him? He pressed a button to switch the call to loudspeaker, waiting impatiently for a sign that she was there.

The left passenger door opened. He started to frown, but he ended up stunned instead to see Lilac slipping into the seat beside him. She pulled the door shut then turned to him with a smile, asking, “Where…to?”

****

They had a late lunch at a Japanese restaurant, Nick reserving a private room for them while his entire security team remained outside, guarding its screen door entrance. The small room had paper-thin walls adorned with silk paintings while throw pillows added color to the otherwise simple room, with one small table in between Nick and Lilac.

When both of them had lowered themselves on the floor, Indian-style, the kimono-clad waitress served them seaweed salad and miso soup. For Nick, the waitress had something extra, half of her breasts popping out of her loosely tied kimono.

Lilac was badly tempted to roll her eyes but managed not to. She shouldn’t care if half the world flirted with Nick Christakos, she told herself firmly. After all, they were just friends.