Nic's Devotion: An Endless Series: Book One (23 page)

Chapter Twenty

NIC

     “You’re always falling asleep on me.” I whispered
softly. Cuddling her closer I shifted raising my legs so I was lying on the
couch. I tucked Carrie into my side arranging her along the left side of my
body. The feel of her pressed up against me was both amazing and torturous.

     I wanted this girl so badly, I ached…literally. I had
felt like a shithead the entire time I’d held and comforted her during her five
minute episode because my dick had been throbbing painfully under her bottom.
The thing had a mind of its own and all it knew was that its counterpart was
only inches away.

     This latest incident made me realize I was going to
have to be even more careful with Carrie, and rather than becoming annoyed at
the thought I just hoped I was strong enough not to mess it up. I stroked her
hair that flowed down the side of the couch like black silk. I’d thought I had
a relative comprehension of her fear before, but now I could see it went much
deeper—a fear of being held down and restrained possibly.

     Immeasurable rage filled me at what Carrie might have
experienced. I prayed it wasn’t as terrible as I was envisioning. She’d said
that something bad had happened and she’d had to go into a clinic for a year. A
whole bloody year of therapy suggested something more than just bad. It had to
have been damn horrific.

     If what I was imagining was true then Carrie was
actually well adjusted. Rape, or god willing, attempted rape, could leave some
lasting internal scars, where she wouldn’t want to be touched ever again.
However, she said that she liked kissing me and the feel of my body so maybe,
hopefully, I was wrong in my assumption of rape and it was something totally
different. Maybe she’d been locked in some small room for an extended period of
time. That would explain her claustrophobia.   

     I smiled remembering her comment of how she was getting
good at kissing. Oh, she was getting good alright. When she’d copied me and
sucked and worked my bottom lip…well, that’s what had made me lose control.

     And remembering wasn’t doing anything for my hard-on;
reaching down I adjusted my junk to the right, away from her. Kissing her was
better than fucking any of the other experienced girls I’d been with
previously, and I knew she responded because of me and not because I was on the
lacrosse team, or because I was heir of Stanford tools. Moreover, because of
her ingrained guardedness the responses she gave me were all the sweeter.

     Gazing down at her angelic face I could hardly believe
it, but I think I was falling in love with her. I never thought it was possible
for me to feel like this, never thought I would fall in love. Living with my
parents and seeing their cold detached relationship had instilled in me an
illustration of what I had expected my life to end up resembling. The last
thing I wanted was to end up in a marriage like theirs, but it was just
something I assumed would come to pass as girls came and went in my life leaving
me entirely unaffected emotionally. 

     Girls had always come easily to me, and I’d accepted
what was offered, but I never felt for any of them what I felt for Carrie. She
called to all my male instincts. The most obvious; I wanted her. My body hungered
for her constantly. It wasn’t just physical though. I thought about her every
minute of the day; what she might be doing and if she was safe. My dreams were
filled with her; most of them were wet dreams, but as much as my body yearned
for her I found I wanted her happy above anything else.

     Every cell of my body had seemed to recognize her as
mine since the first moment I’d seen her. I’d fought it and thrown up excuses,
not wanting to accept it being the dumbass that I was, but I wasn’t fighting it
any longer though. Now I wanted to battle her demons. No, fuck that; I wanted
to kill them for her and I was beginning to think I wouldn’t just stick to the
ones in her mind. I’d kill for her in reality, maybe because it seemed no one
else ever had.

     She was moving into the dorms tomorrow and somehow
she’d acquired a room to herself. I thought I would be happy about that since
she wouldn’t have to take the bus any longer, but instead I was now worried
about the dorm being coed. There would be other guys living near her. She was
so damn gorgeous they would be flocking around her in droves. I know the
security to the building was pretty good, but what about the ya-hoo’s that
already lived in the building. There could be a predator just down the hall from
her. I almost wish she would continue to stay at the woman’s shelter. They had
top notch security and that dragon at the front desk was sure to keep any
undesirables out.

     Carrie moaned burrowing closer into my side and her leg
moved up mine creeping closer to my cock. I groaned; I’d just gotten the thing
to shrink down some and now it was swelling painfully again.

     Reaching over my head I grabbed the remote and turned
on the television. Watching lacrosse highlights might get my mind off knees,
erections, and how her legs were slightly spread. Uhhg!

     Suddenly, I was jerked from a sound sleep. I tighten my
hold on Carrie reflexively, and she moaned softly but continued sleeping. Wondering
what had woken me I was given an answer when Seth appeared in the entrance hall.
I relaxed at seeing him realizing it was probably the sound of the front door
that had roused me.

     Seth stopped at seeing Carrie and me and an odd expression
passed over his face. He walked into the room sitting down in the chair near my
feet.

     “It’s a no wonder she fell asleep if you made her
suffer through this shit. What the hell you watching shuffle board on ice for?”
He grunted softly.

     I looked at the television to see grown men doing
exactly that. “That’s called curling and it’s an actual Olympic sport.” I
informed him with a yawn.

     “It’s disturbing that you know that.” Seth snorted.

     “Anyway, I wasn’t watching that when I fell asleep. I
was watching lacrosse highlights.”

     “Again, no wonder she fell asleep.” He criticized.

     I tossed the remote to him which he caught no problem.
“Actually, Carrie fell asleep almost immediately after dinner.”

     Seth discovered some soccer highlights on a different
sports channel. “You need some advice on how to keep a chick entertained?” He
ragged quietly.

     I didn’t say anything and he looked at me inquiringly.
I must have had a look on my face because his expression sobered. That was
saying a lot because Seth always looked serious.

     “Just kidding, man.” He mumbled.

     “No, it’s not anything you said. She was just tired.” I
replied with a sigh.

     Seth leaned forward in the chair and his gaze switched
from me to Carrie. His expression became thoughtful, his frown cavernous. Anger
was in his eyes when they came back to me. “Something happened like last time,
didn’t it?”

     I was a little surprised by the degree of emotion
emanating from Seth. It almost spoke of a personal interest.

     Jealousy wanted to rear its head but I suppressed it;
he was just showing concern. Looking down at Carrie sleeping serenely next to
me I gave a stroke to her hair. I took note that my arm had fallen asleep under
her, but I didn’t care; some discomfort was worth her having a peaceful sleep. 

     “Yeah,” I answered gravely. 

     Seth’s frown didn’t abate. “You did something to
distress her?”

     “I did something that brought up bad memories.” I
replied generally, not appreciating his accusatory tone. “There’s a lot of hurt
inside of her. She’s got a strong spirit, but certain things I think catch her
by surprise and it just overwhelms her.”

     Seth’s gaze returned to Carrie and I began to bristle
at the duration of the stare. I was about to snap and ask him what the hell he
was staring at when the front door opened and then slammed closed. Seth’s eyes
moved away at the sound but came right back when Carrie suddenly shot up from her
sound sleep with a loud gasp. Her eyes were wide with alarm.

     I sat up swiftly next to her; at least as swiftly as I
could with a dead arm. “Carrie, it’s okay. It’s just the front door.”

     Carrie’s gaze was sleepily and adorably unfocused as
she turned to look at me. She frowned in bewilderment blinking a few times and
took in the surroundings. Catching sight of Seth her brows rose in surprise and
then went back to frowning.

     “We fell asleep and Seth came home and woke us up.” I
explained rubbing her back soothingly with my working arm. I shook the other
one trying to wake it up. 

     A giggle erupted from the hallway and then Evan came
into view with—
CRAP
—Nikki trailing behind him. What in the Sam Hell was
she doing here? Seth muttered an almost inaudible “Fuck’ next to me. I couldn’t
have expressed it any better. Carrie’s drowsy confusion was turning to
discomfort; probably having to do with waking up to a roomful of people she
scarcely knew.

     Evan gave us all a smile and a nod. “Hey everyone; this
is Nikki. We’re just going to go upstairs and catch some late night shows.” He
gave us an eyebrow wiggle in case we’d suddenly turned stupid.

     Nikki’s gaze had zeroed in on me as she came into view.
Her eyes had a malicious cast to them that didn’t bode well. She stepped away
from Evan and walked into the room.

     “What are you guys watching in here?” She asked in a
tone way too sugary sweet.    

     “Sports,” growled Seth shortly.

     Nikki’s gaze remained glued to me as she walked over to
the other empty chair and sat down. The smile that curved her lips was eerie.
My stomach clenched in response. Was I going to have another girl air my dirty
laundry in front of Carrie?

     “Hey Nic, long time no see.” She smirked.

     “Nikki,” I replied curtly.

     Her eyes flashed with anger. Shit, here it comes. Nikki
turned her attention to Carrie. Another, even more disturbing smile curved her
mouth.

     “Don’t I know you; you look familiar?”

     Carrie looked like she was still trying to wake up
fully. Her brow pinched and she looked around the room at everyone probably
feeling the tension in the air and not knowing the reason. “I’m sorry, I’m not
sure. I guess you could have seen me around campus.”

     Evan walked half-way into the room and stopped. His
expression was just as confused as Carrie’s. I knew he had no idea of my past
hook-up with Nikki. He most likely wouldn’t have brought her home if he did. 

     Nikki leaned back in the chair looking utterly
comfortable. “No, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen you somewhere else.”

     I pulled Carrie into my side. “You saw her with me at
the party we had last week. I’m
pretty
sure
I informed you of
that fact,
and
that I wasn’t interested in what you were not so subtly
offering.”

     Nikki’s expression twisted with fury.

     “What in the hell is going on, Nikki? Did you play me
just so you could get into the house and cause some sort of scene?” Evan walked
over to Nikki angrily.

     Nikki held up her hands with an expression of forged
innocence. “Hey, I can handle being shot down. Who’s making a scene; I was just
making an observation that this girl looked familiar to me. And I don’t think
it’s from school or the party. No, you have a face that looks…” Nikki’s
innocent expression turned mean as she paused for the effect of her next words.
“…famous.”

     Carrie went rigid next to me, and her expression
displayed sheer horror. Her body started to quake and she attempted to rise,
but her legs were wobbling so bad they couldn’t hold her up. I stood and pulled
her trembling into my body wanting to give her my comfort and support.  

     “No, no, please, no.” Carrie’s soft spoken words
sounded desolate.

     Concern and rage warred inside of me; concern for
Carrie and rage against Nikki. 

     “Evan, get that bitch out of here now.” I shouted
angrily. I didn’t know what Nikki was trying to do but it was scaring the hell
out of Carrie and I wasn’t going to stand for it.

     Evan walked over and jerked Nikki up out of the chair.
Seth stood up too, looking like he was going to assist in booting her out.

     Nikki chuckled gleefully as she was hauled up. “Now I
remember; four years ago you were in the news. You killed your own father, and
then you were sent away to some psychiatric hospital.”

     Her announcement had everyone freezing in momentary
shock. What in the hell was Nikki talking about? There was no possible way that
Carrie could have killed her own father. The girl was the sweetest, least
aggressive, non-violent person I could think of.

     I put a little space between us so I could look down at
her, wanting to see her expression. Only Carrie’s eyes were closed and she appeared
to be gasping for breath. Alarm stabbed through me.

     “Carrie, “I gave her a small shake. “Carrie,” I
repeated in apprehension when she didn’t respond; she could only gasp for
breath. Her eyes flew open and absolute panic came over her face. Then she
stopped breathing altogether. Her hands came up to grasp my arms, finger nails
dug into my skin as her mouth moved but no breaths came in or out. Her face was
turning red.

     “Carrie!” I yelled, shaking her forcefully. “Breathe!”

     “Shit,” Seth exclaimed rushing over.

     Before he reached us Carrie’s eyes rolled back in her
head and she passed out in my arms. Her head lolled backwards on her neck and
her body slumped lifelessly.    

     I caught her up in my arms absolute terror engulfing
me. “Carrie, Carrie.” Squeezing her I yelled down into her face trying to wake
her up.