Night Tide (29 page)

the!space!like!a!pea!in!a!tin!pot.!And!their!presence,!for!a!long!

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while!at!least,!would!likely!be!a!reminder!of!the!hole!in!all!of!

their!lives.!Divorce!does!that,!much!as!people!think!they!want!

it.!Molly!popped!into!mind!unbidden.!!

!

“Why!are!you!looking!at!me!like!that?”!Babs!said.!

!

Molly’s! visage! slowly! dissolved,! replaced! by! the! more!

careworn! lines! of! Babs’! puzzled! face.! She! was! a! year! or! two!

younger!than!Molly,!but!the!creases!and!dark!circles!etched!by!

worry! and! sleepless! nights! made! her! look! a! decade! older.! An!

inch! of! gray! showed! at! the! roots! of! her! dark! hair,! and! she!

hadn’t!taken!the!time!to!put!on!makeup.!

!

“Sorry,”!I!said.!“I!was!just!wondering!if!this!is!really!what!

you!want.”!

!

“Of!course!this!isn’t!what!I!want.”!Her!voice!was!shrill.!She!

held! her! arms! rigid! at! her! sides,! holding! herself! together.! “I!

want!a!husband!who!talks!to!me!about!his!day,!who!buys!me!

flowers! for! no! reason,! who! takes! me! to! dinner! someplace!

special!on!my!birthday,!not!some!stranger!I!see!at!odd!times!of!

the! day! and! night! between! shifts.! A! husband! who’s! home! at!

night,!safe!with!me!and!the!boys,!not!someone!in!the!hospital!

with!a!bullet!wound!in!his!chest.!God!damn!it,!Blake,!what!do!

you!think!I!want?”!

!

Tears! rolled! silently! down! her! cheeks.! She! sniffed.! “I’m!

sorry,!you!didn’t!need!to!hear!all!that.!It’s!not!like!me!to!just!fall!

apart.”!

!

Heat! crept! into! my! face,! and! I! shifted! my! weight.! “It’s!

okay.”!

!

“What!are!you!doing!here?!What!do!you!want?”!

!

“I!need!Charlie’s!spare!gun,”!I!said!quietly.!

!

She! tipped! her! head! slightly! with! narrowed! eyes! and!

sighed,! swiping! away! the! tears! with! her! fingers.! “You,! too?!

You’re! mixed! up! in! this?! Of! course! you! are.! What! am! I!

thinking?”!!

!

I!started!to!object.!She!waved!the!words!away!before!they!

formed!on!my!lips.!

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!

“Wait! here,! I’ll! get! it,”! she! said.! “The! key’s! on! the! rack!

under!the!wall!phone!in!the!kitchen.”!!

!

I! made! my! way! to! the! kitchen,! nearly! unnerved! by! the!

quiet.! Charlie’s! presence! was! everywhere,! from! the! spit6

polished! black! brogans! by! the! front! door! to! the! sporting!

magazines! strewn! in! the! den.! An! open! suitcase! stood! on! a!

folding! luggage! rack! next! to! the! couch! in! the! family! room,! a!

reminder! that! Sarah! was! still! in! residence.! I! wondered! if! she!

was!taking!sides.!I!knew!better.!She’d!do!everything!she!could!

to!negotiate!a!truce!between!them.!

!

I! found! the! key! to! Charlie’s! gun! case! where! Babs! said! it!

would!be!and!waited.!!

!

Babs! returned! and! held! out! the! gun! safe.! “Charlie! knows!

about! this?”! She! quickly! waved! a! hand.! “Never! mind.! I! don’t!

want!to!know.!Take!it.”!

!

I!tucked!the!box!under!my!arm.!“Where!are!the!boys?”!

!

She!shrugged.!“Steve’s!at!a!baseball!game,!and!Chuck!went!

over!to!a!friend’s!house.”!She!paused.!“I’m!trying!to!keep!things!

as!normal!as!possible.”!

!

“It!must!be!hard.!I’m!sure!it’ll!all!work!out!somehow.”!

!

She!blinked!back!more!tears!and!reached!for!a!tissue!from!

a!box!on!the!counter.!!

!

“Is!there!anything!I!can!do?”!I!said.!

!

She!blew!her!nose!noisily!and!shook!her!head.!!

!

I!held!up!the!gun!box.!“Thanks!for!this.!I—”!

!

She!straightened!her!arm,!palm!toward!me,!and!turned!her!

head!to!the!side.!“Don’t.!I!used!to!be!proud,!you!know,!married!

to! a! cop.! Now…”! She! glanced! at! the! box! and! shivered.! “Good!

riddance.”!

!

I! turned! to! go! and! stopped.! “Babs,! where! was! Charlie!

born?”!

!

She! frowned.! “I! don’t! know.! Somewhere! in! the! Midwest.!

Does!it!matter?”!

!

“It!could!be!important.”!

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!

“I!think!his!birth!certificate’s!in!the!lockbox!in!the!den.!He!

doesn’t!trust!banks.!You!need!to!know!now?”!

!

“If!it’s!not!too!much!trouble.”!

!

She!hesitated.!“What’s!going!on,!Blake?”!

!

“Charlie! and! Sarah! asked! me! to! help! them! find! their!

parents.!This!could!help.”!!

!

“They!just!disappeared?!It’s!not!like!them.”!

!

I! hesitated,! but! she! had! the! boys! to! think! about.! “I! think!

Clayt!and!Connie!are!in!trouble,!Babs.!I!think!they’re!on!the!run!

from!something!in!their!past.”!

!

She!put!her!hand!to!her!mouth,!her!eyes!widening.!

!

I! shook! my! head.! “I! don’t! think! you! and! the! boys! have!

anything! to! worry! about.! Charlie! and! I! were! in! the! way! of!

whoever’s!after!them,!that’s!all.!They!won’t!bother!you.”!

!

She!didn’t!need!to!know!the!rest!of!it.!

!

“Are!you!sure?”!She!pulled!on!an!earlobe.!“Okay,!then,!wait!

here.”!

!

Gone!for!only!a!minute!or!so,!she!returned!with!a!piece!of!

paper!in!her!hands.!She!held!it!out.!I!took!it!and!unfolded!it!on!

the! counter.! Charlie! had! been! born! in! May,! 1968,! in! a! little!

town! in! Wisconsin.! Not! Madison,! but! close! I’d! have! bet.!

Mother’s! name! was! listed! as! C.! Constance! Jones.! No! father.! I!

frowned.!Maybe!I!was!wrong.!Maybe!it!was!a!coincidence!that!

Clayt!and!Connie!Jones!from!Canada!really!had!gone!to!school!

in!Madison!at!the!same!time!as!the!Wilsons.!And!maybe!Colin!

and! Corinne! Wilson! had! just! happened! to! end! up! in! Canada!

when!things!got!too!portentous!for!them!here!back!in!the!early!

’Seventies.!!

!

And!maybe!I!could!sprout!wings!and!fly.!

Night&Tide
—Sherer&

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!

!

Chapter&31&

!

!

My!phone!rang!on!the!way!out!to!the!car.!I!tucked!the!gun!

case!under!an!arm!and!flipped!the!phone!open.!

!

“We!need!to!talk.”!Sarah’s!voice.!

!

“About!what?”!

!

“You!can’t!just!walk!out!like!that,!Blake.”!

!

“Sure!I!can.!I!did.”!

!

“Please,!Blake.!He!needs!you.”!!

!

“Like!a!sharp!stick!in!the!eye.”!

!

“
We
!need!you,!then.”!!

!

I! didn’t! have! a! reply! to! that.! My! phone! beeped,! signaling!

another!incoming!call.!I!ignored!it!and!let!it!go!to!voicemail.!

!

“What’s!going!on!with!you!two?”!Sarah!said.!

!

“He!didn’t!tell!you?”!

!

“Clammed! up! after! you! left.! Said! he! didn’t! want! to! talk!

about!it.!But!I!do.!Meet!me.!Please?!A!cup!of!coffee!somewhere.!

Five!minutes,!ten,!max.!You!can!spare!that!much.”!

!

“You’re!not!going!to!like!hearing!it!anymore!than!he!does.”!

!

“What?!Not!like!hearing!what?”!

!

“Are!you!still!at!the!hospital?”!

!

“Where!else!would!I!be?”!

!

I! gave! her! the! name! of! a! coffee! place! across! from! Seattle!

University,!a!short!walk!away.!

!

“I’ll!be!there!in!twenty!minutes,”!I!said.!

!

She! was! there! when! I! arrived,! sitting! at! a! table! in! back,!

chin! resting! on! her! palm,! staring! at! the! baristas! behind! the!

counter,!worry!etching!her!face.!She’d!let!her!long,!straight!hair!

down!out!of!her!usual!ponytail,!and!now!she!tucked!one!side!

behind!her!ear!with!her!fingers.!The!familiar!gesture!reversed!

time!for!an!instant,!revealing!a!glimpse!of!the!past.!She!gave!a!

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little!wave!when!she!saw!me,!the!sunshine!of!a!smile!hesitantly!

breaking!through!fast6moving!clouds!and!disappearing!again.!

!

I! skirted! a! table! of! students,! books! and! papers! spread!

across! their! table.! Two! girls! and! a! guy! leaned! in! over! their!

open! books! in! an! animated! discussion.! A! fourth! leaned! back,!

chair!tipped!on!its!back!legs,!his!sandaled!feet!propped!on!the!

edge! of! the! table,! an! open! textbook! resting! on! the! fleece! vest!

that! covered! his! belly.! He! scratched! his! chin,! fingers! lost! in! a!

tangle!of!scruffy!beard.!Blue!eyes!peered!out!of!a!face!as!pale!as!

a! Finn! in! winter.! Thick,! matted! dreadlocks! spilled! out! of! a!

colorful! Rasta! cap! over! his! collar.! The! itinerants! standing!

outside!the!day!labor!office!down!the!street!looked!cleaner.!!

!

“Thanks! for! coming,”! she! said! as! I! eased! into! the! chair!

across!from!her.!

!

“Not!like!I!seem!to!have!much!choice!with!you!two.”!

!

“What’s!that!supposed!to!mean?”!

!

I!shook!my!head.!“Nothing.!Look,!Sarah,!you!asked!me!to!

help!find!out!what!happened!to!your!parents.!I!thought!Charlie!

was!on!board!with!that,!but!he!doesn’t!want!to!hear!anything!

bad!about!them.”!

!

“What! do! you! mean! ‘bad’?! You! alluded! to! that! before.!

What’s!this!about?!What’d!they!do?”!

!

“I!think!they!organized!a!raid!on!a!research!lab!back!when!

we!were!kids.”!

!

Her! eyes! widened,! but! she! didn’t! flip! out.! “You! really! are!

nuts.”!

!

“Maybe.”!!

!

For! a! moment! I! considered! leaving,! walking! away! from!

everything.!Dumping!the!mess!in!her!lap.!She!was!right.!Charlie!

was! the! cop.! It! was! his! job! to! figure! this! out,! not! mine.! But!

someone! wanted! me! dead,! too.! If! anything,! a! sense! of! self6

preservation!should!keep!me!going.!The!impulse!to!quit!should!

have!warned!me!it!was!time!for!a!dose!of!meds.!

!

“Sebastian!Fitch.”!The!words!popped!out!of!my!mouth.!

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!

She!started.!“What!about!him?”!

!

I!stared!at!her.!“That!name!means!something!to!you?”!

!

“Sure.!Uncle!Sebastian.!You!remember!him.”!She!frowned.!

!

“
Uncle
!Sebastian?”!I!shook!my!head.!“I!don’t!think!so.”!

!

Her! brow! furrowed.! “Maybe! you! never! met! him.! He! died!

when! we! were! in! college.! My! sophomore! year! I! think.! I! was!

sure!you!must!have!met!him!at!some!family!dinner.”!

!

“Nope.!Never!heard!of!him!before!a!week!ago.”!

!

“Why?!Where’d!you!hear!his!name?”!

!

“Long!story.”!I!chased!thoughts!around!my!head!like!a!flea6

bit!dog!after!his!tail.!“He!wasn’t!your!real!uncle,!was!he?”!

!

The!corners!of!her!mouth!turned!up.!“God,!no.!Just!one!of!

mom!and!dad’s!good!friends.!I!knew!him!ever!since!I!was!tiny.!

He’d! come! around! once! in! a! while,! roughhouse! with! us! kids!

when!were!little,!talk!with!Clayt,!stay!for!dinner.!Clayt!always!

called!him!‘Uncle’!Sebastian!around!us.”!

!

“You!know!what!he!and!your!dad!talked!about?”!

!

Her! head! wagged.! “Their! private! talks! were! just! that—

private.!Around!us!he!didn’t!talk!about!anything!in!particular.!

The!usual!stuff—sports,!weather,!school,!whatever.”!

!

“Nothing!unusual!around!the!time!you!started!college?”!

!

Her!mouth!formed!the!word!‘no,’!but!no!sound!came!out.!

She! cocked! her! head.! “Now! that! you! mention! it,! I! saw! him!

around!the!house!a!lot!the!summer!before!my!freshman!year.!

Never!gave!it!much!thought.!Just!figured!he!was!bored.!Brought!

over!a!friend!of!his!a!couple!of!times,!too.!I!don’t!remember!his!

name,!though.!No,!wait,!it!was!Phil.”!

!

She! paused! and! focused! on! thoughts! that! hovered!

somewhere!over!my!left!shoulder.!!

!

“The!strange!thing?!That!fall?!He!got!religion,!I!swear.!Born!

again.!Always!talking!about!‘the!Word’!and!‘what!would!Jesus!

do?’! I! thought! it! had! something! to! do! with,! you! know,! what!

happened! to! me! freshman! year.! But! now! I! see! that’s! pretty!

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silly.!Something!happened—to!him,!not!me.”!She!stared!at!me,!

gaze!flicking!across!my!face.!“What’s!this!about?”!

!

“He!helped!blow!up!a!building!on!a!college!campus!back!in!

Illinois.!Looks!like!your!parents!were!involved.!Maybe!planned!

the!job.”!!

!

Her! hand! went! to! her! mouth! and! her! eyes! grew! wide.!

“Clayt! and! Connie?! They! wouldn’t! hurt! a! fly.! And! Uncle!

Sebastian?!He!was!a!big!teddy!bear.”!

!

“The! FBI! found! Fitch’s! fingerprint! at! the! scene.! Never!

connected! him! with! the! case,! though,! until! long! after! he! was!

killed.”!!

!

She! was! shaking! her! head.! “They! couldn’t! have! done! it.!

They!never!left!town!that!year.!Didn’t!even!take!a!vacation.!You!

know,! because! of! what! happened! to! me.! They! wanted! to! stay!