Niubi! (16 page)

Decadence reached its apex in the 1930s, when the opium trade had grown into a full-fledged international drug cartel trafficking in morphine, heroin, and cocaine. The cargo made its way into Europe, South America, and the United States—all controlled by a Chinese mob boss who was simultaneously head of the Nationalist government’s Opium Suppression Bureau. The city had three hundred jazz cabarets and a hundred thousand prostitutes, organized gambling thrived on the largest scale of any city in the world, in addition to opium parlors and gambling halls there were nightclubs that featured erotic shows with real live onstage sex, and at some hotels you could order heroin via room service.

Today Shanghai is still known for its nightlife but compared to its heyday is a relatively staid financial city. The influx of foreigners coming to misbehave, however, continues, alive and well, throughout the country. For most, this seems to involve drinking oneself into oblivion every night, doing a lot of drugs, and sleeping around with the locals while teaching English and “finding yourself.”

Whether your vice of choice is methamphetamines or auto theft, hookers galore or simply partying till dawn, here is the necessary vocabulary for every naughty deed under the Eastern sun.

玩
wán
(
wahn
)

Play. A generic word for going out, partying, or any kind of social activity.

 

外出
wài chū
(
why choo
)

Going out.

 

酒吧
jǐubā
(
joe bah
)

Bar.

 

夜总会
yèzǒnghuì
(
yeh dzohng hway
)

Club. Literally “night meeting.”

 

迪厅
dītīng
(
dee teeng
)

Club. Literally “disco hall.”

 

夜店
yèdiàn
(
yeh dyinn
)

Nightclub. The term encompasses discos, karaoke bars, cafés, and video arcades and can also refer to establishments offering illegal sex services. The term originated in Taiwan and has spread through southern China. It’s used to a lesser degree by young people in northern China as well.

 

迪斯科
dīsīkē
(
dee suh kuh
)

Disco. A transliteration of the English.

 

轰趴
hōngpā
(
hohng pah
)

A transliteration based on the English phrase “house party” but with the additional connotation of having so much fun that you collapse: 轰
hōng
(
hohng
) means “an explosion” and 趴
pā
(
pah
) means “lie on your stomach,” so the words together suggest something along the lines of being struck dead. Used in Taiwan.

 

蹦迪
bèngdī
(
bung dee
)

Disco dance.

 

卡拉 OK
kǎ lā OK
(
kah lah OK
) or KTV

Both terms mean “karaoke.” The first is a transliteration of the English word, but most Chinese simply say KTV, pronouncing the letters as you would in English.

 

麦霸
màibà
(
my bah
)

Microphone monopolist. 麦
Mài
(
my
) refers to a mike and 霸
bà
(
bah
) means “tyrant.” A term popular among young people to describe someone who hogs the mike at karaoke.

 

刷夜
shuā yè
(
shwah yeh
)

To stay out all night, hang out with shady people, run with a bad crowd. Literally “swap night.”

喝酒
hē jǐu
(
huh joe
)

To drink alcohol.

 

喝多
hēduō
(
huh dwuh
)

Drunk, hung over. Literally “drink much.”

 

喝醉
hēzuì
(
huh dzway
)

Wasted. Literally “drink tipsy.”

 

喝大了
hē dà le
(
huh dah luh
)

A northern Chinese way to say “very drunk” or “wasted.” Literally “drank big.”

 

干
gān
(
gahn
) or 干了
gān le
(
gahn luh
)

Drain one’s glass, shoot it, suck down a drink really fast. Literally “dry [the glass].”

 

酒滥用
jǐu lànyòng
(
joe lahn yohng
)

Alcohol abuse. Literally “alcohol excessive use.”

 

酒鬼
jǐuguǐ
(
joe gway
)

Alcoholic. Literally “alcohol ghost.”

 

白酒
báijǐu
(
buy joe
)

Chinese liquor. Literally “white alcohol.”
Báijǐu
is notoriously strong (about the same proof as vodka) and even more notoriously foul tasting. It is drunk only in shots, accompanied by an elaborate set of rituals and social mores that, in a nutshell, enable Chinese men to bully each other into puking oblivion beneath a veneer of politeness.

 

醉酒驾驶
zuì jǐu jià shǐ
(
dzway joe jah shih
)

Drink and drive.

撒谎
sāhuăng
(sah hwahng)

Tell a lie. Literally “release yellow.”

 

荤的
hūn de
(
hwen duh
)

Dirty, obscene, pornographic. Literally “meat or fish,” referring to Buddhism, which considers such foods unclean or dirty. One term that uses this is 荤段子
hūn duànzǐ
(
hwen swun dz
), meaning “dirty joke.”

 

吃枪药
chī qiāng yào
(
chih chyahng yow
)

To speak rudely or insolently. Literally “to swallow gunpowder.” As in: “Why are you being such an asshole—did you swallow gunpowder?”

 

喷粪
pēn fèn
(
pen fen
)

To swear, curse, say dirty words. Literally “spurt manure” or “puff out dung.”

 

毛腔
máoqiāng
(
maow chyahng
)

Swear, curse, lose one’s temper. Literally “hairy chests.”

 

嘴臭
zuǐ chòu
(
dzway choe
)

Literally “stinky mouth.” Refers to someone who is vulgar or rude or swears a lot.

 

裸奔
luǒ bēn
(
lwuh ben
)

Streaking.

 

玩心跳
wán xīntiào
(
wahn sheen tyow
)

Thrill seeking. Literally “play with your heartbeat.” That is, to engage in activities that will quicken your heartbeat.

 

飙车
biāo chē
(
byow chuh
)

Drag racing. Literally “whirlwind car.”

 

钢管舞
gāng guǎn wǔ
(
gahng gwahn oo
)

Pole dancing. This activity has become popular among some urban Chinese women as a form of exercise, with at least a few of them unaware that westerners associate it with stripping.

 

脱衣女郎
tuōyī nǚláng
(
twuh ee duh nee lahng
)

Stripper. Literally “taking-off-clothes girl.”

 

路怒
lù nù
(
loo noo
)

Road rage. Traffic in Beijing, and China’s other major cities, is notoriously bad.

 

欺骗
qīpiàn
(
chee pyinn
)

Cheat (any kind of cheating). A cheater is a 骗子
piànzi
(
pyinn dz
).

 

小混混
xiǎo húnhún
(
shyaow hwen hwen
) or 混子
hunzǐ
(
hwen dz
)

Small-time crook.

 

假活儿
jiǎ huór
(
jah hwurr
)

Beijing slang for a swindler or con man. Literally “fake work.”

 

小报告
xiǎobào gào
(
shaow baow gaow
—all three syllables rhyme with “cow”)

Snitching. Literally “file little secret reports.”

 

踩
cǎi
(
tsigh
)

To slander, libel, insult. Literally “step on.”

 

暴打
bào dǎ
(
baow dah
)

Beat up.

 

满地找牙
mǎn dì zhǎo yá
(
mahn dee jaow yah
)

Get beaten up. Literally “find [one’s] teeth on the ground.” Used in northern China.

 

掐
qiā
(
chyah
) or 掐架
qiājià
(
chyah jah
)

Fight.

 

干
gān
(
gahn
) or 干架
gānjià
(
gahn jah
)

Fight. Also slang for “kill.”

 

废
fèi
(
fay
)

To injure or maim. Can also mean “to break” or “amputate.”

 

给他个颜色看看
gěi tā ge yánsè kànkan
(
gay tah guh yen suh kahn kahn
)

Beat him up. Literally “give him a color to see” (that color being red).

 

找不着北
zhǎobùzháoběi
(
jow boo jow bay
)

Knock out, beat up. Can also mean “to get confused.” Literally “unable to find where north is.”

 

五指山红
wǔ zhǐ shān hóng
(
ooh jih shahn hohng
)

Literally “five fingers turning red.” That is, a slap so hard it leaves five red finger marks on your face.

 

全武行
quán wǔ xíng
(
chren oo sheeng
)

Fighting in public. The term originally referred to acrobatic fighting in Chinese opera performances. Now it also refers to fighting in the streets or other public places.

 

铁头功
tiě tóu gōng
(
tyih toe gohng
)

Head butt.

 

打一拳
dǎ yī quán
(dah ee chren)

Punch. Literally “hit (with) a fist.” Or you can specify the person being punched by saying 给他一拳
gěi tā yī quán
(
gay tah ee chren
), literally “give him a fist,” meaning “punch him.”

 

顺出去
shùn chūqù
(
shwen choo chee
)

Means “to carry something out vertically,” for example, turning a dresser on its side and moving it out of the bedroom, but can also mean carrying a person out after beating them up, as when someone is being kicked out of a bar. Used in northern China only.

 

脚底摸油
jiǎo dǐ mō yóu
(
jyow dee mwuh yo
)

Cut and run, leave the scene of the crime, remove oneself from an awkward situation. Literally “apply oil to the soles of your feet”; that is, to speed your retreat.

黄
huáng
(
hwahng
) or 黄色
huángsè
(
hwahng suh
)

Obscene, dirty, pornographic. Literally “yellow.” In Chinese class you’re most likely to learn 色情
sèqíng
(
suh cheeng
) for “pornography”; it, however, is considered outdated. Nowadays anything pornographic or dirty is referred to as “yellow,” an association that may have originated in the nineteenth century, when French novels, recognizable by their yellow covers, became notorious throughout the world for their “immoral” sexual content. Thus a pornographic movie is a 黄色电影
huángsè diànyĭng
(
hwahng suh dyinn ing
), literally “yellow movie”; a 黄带
huángdài
(
hwahng die
), “yellow tape”; or 黄片
huángpiān
(
hwahng pyinn
), literally “yellow piece.” A porno mag is a 黄色书刊
huángsè shūkān
(
hwahng suh shoo kahn
), literally “yellow book,” and a dirty joke or story is a 黄段子
huáng duànzǐ
(
hwahng dwun dz
), or “yellow episode.”

 

毛片
máopiān
(
mao pyinn
)

Porn video. Literally “hair tape” because you can see pubic hair.

 

A 片
A piàn
(
A pyinn
)

Hard-core porn movie. Literally “A video,” for “adult video” (though, interestingly, some Chinese mistakenly believe the
A
stands for American).

 

三级片
sānjí piàn
(
sahn gee pyinn
)

Soft-core porn movie. Literally “level-three video,” referring to the most restrictive level in Hong Kong’s movie-rating system.

吸毒
xīdú
(
she do
)

To take drugs. Literally “suck poison.”

 

毒贩子
dúfànzǐ
(
do fahn dz
) or just 毒贩
dúfàn
(
do fahn
)

Drug dealer. “To deal drugs” is 贩毒
fàndú
(
fahn do
).

 

药物滥用
yàowù lànyòng
(
yaow oo lahn yohng
) or 毒品滥用
dúpǐn lànyòng
(
do peen lahn yohng
)

Substance abuse. Literally “drug excessive use.” The first term can mean any type of drugs, including medicine, and the second term specifically means illegal drugs, but both are frequently used. You can insert the name of a drug in front of 滥用
lànyòng
to indicate abuse of that specific drug.

 

瘾君子
yǐnjūnzǐ
(
een jwen dz
)

Drug addict. Literally “addicted gentleman” or “addicted nobleperson,” because once upon a time only wealthy people could afford drugs, and opium was considered a status symbol.

 

抽
chōu
(
choe
)

Smoke (as in smoking marijuana, opium, heroin, etc.). 吸
Xī
(
she
), literally “inhale,” can be used too, though it is less common than
chōu
.