No One's Hero (Chadwell Hearts) (16 page)

The man who answers the phone sounds like he hasn’t slept in a month. “Morrison?”

“Yes, who is this?” I’ve got the feeling I know the voice, but I can’t place it.

“Sorry, I probably don’t sound like myself. It’s Reisner, from the 326 at Pendleton.”

The ghosts from my past are determined to haunt me this week. “Reisner, man, how does it feel to be back from the dead?”

His voice is filled with bitterness. “Not as good as I thought it would. Listen, I hear you’ve got some connections. I need a new identity, and I need it fast. Can you help me?”

His extreme level of desperation is a huge red flag, and my spidey senses are way beyond tingling. But he’s a friend, a fellow Marine, and I can’t turn my back on him. “Are you in trouble? If you are, maybe I can help without—”

“No man, I’m not, I swear. I just need to start over, away from here. If you can’t help, I get it, I just thought it was worth asking.”

I sigh, because I don’t have a good feeling about this. “Give me a day or two. I’ll see what I can do.”

In the ring below, Lexi is dismounting and walking her horse toward the exit, so I end my call and go find her.

Her smile doesn’t reach her eyes when she looks up and sees me. “Did I look as awful as I felt?”

“If by awful you mean awesome, then yes.”

She rolls her eyes, but the corner of her mouth ticks up, like she wants to smile. A moment later it’s gone, though, as the instructor strides toward us. “Alexis, how do you feel about your lesson?”

It’s the type of leading question used by shrinks and apparently riding instructors, and I cringe for Lexi’s sake. There is no right answer.

“Embarrassed. I was all over the place.”

“Yes, you were. At least at first. But toward the end, you really settled in and I could see a bit of the promise I saw in your application video. I
know
you can do better than this, but you’ve got to get your head in the game if you want to be competitive here. Don’t let the other students or whatever drama has you so flustered ruin a good thing.”

Lexi takes a deep breath, and I get the feeling she’s contemplating if she really wants to say something or not. “I’ll do better, but if I may say something?”

“Go on.”

“It’s hard to be competitive when I’m taken off the better horse after less than one lesson. I sort of feel like it doesn’t matter what I do, I can’t compete with other students who get their way just by asking.”

“And what makes you think you were taken off of the better horse?”

“Samurai has such range and—”

“And Vandal has years of experience, a top notch pedigree, and is quiet enough to let
you
shine, rather than distracting from your performance. Maybe you need to remember the importance of looking beneath the surface just as much as your wealthier classmates do. I put you on Vandal because I think you are one of the few students here who has enough potential to actually learn what Vandal can teach you.  Don’t prove me wrong.” The instructor turns on her heel and strides off, her boots clacking against the concrete aisle while Lexi stares open-mouthed at her retreating silhouette.

—-♥—-

L
exi

Mrs. Blessing’s words play on repeat in my mind all weekend. Fortunately, Kevin is so absorbed on his laptop with background checks on my classmates and dormmates that he mostly leaves me alone. I’ve been trying to work on assignments for my other classes, but my mind keeps drifting back to her advice. Frustrated, I set my pen down on my notebook and look up from my desk. Kevin is on my bed with his laptop perched on his knees, and he’s completely oblivious to my irritation.

“Do you think I’m shallow?”

Kevin’s gaze crawls up from his screen so slowly I can’t help laughing and wondering who hit the slow motion button. He closes his eyes, tilts his head back dramatically and lets out a huge breath. “Just go ahead and hit me and get it over with.”

This only makes me laugh harder until I’m choking and gasping for breath. “Should I take that as a yes?”

He opens his eyes in time to vehemently shake his head. “Oh no. I didn’t say that. It’s a ‘there is no right answer, and so I’d rather take the lashing that I’m going to get when I give the wrong one, and save myself the pain of you using my words against me later.’”

“I’m not going to hit you. Just answer the question.” I need to stretch after sitting at my desk for so long, so I shift up out of my chair.

“See! You’re already coming over here to hit me.” He holds his hands up protectively over his face.

“Am I?” I rest one knee on the edge of my bed and wait. I’m not sure what I’m doing, but Kevin is so blatantly uncomfortable, I can’t help enjoying it a little bit. Maybe that makes me sick and twisted, but I never expected such a simple question could throw my big tough bodyguard so off balance.

Kevin’s Adam’s apple bobs tellingly as he swallows hard and sets the laptop off to the side, never taking his gaze off mine. “Either that, or you’re looking for some other trouble.”

My breath hisses between my teeth as I’m filled with thoughts of what type of trouble Kevin and I could get into on my bed. We’ve been so careful to avoid touching or anything suggestive since the night he kissed me, but no matter how much I try to ignore it, the attraction I feel for him hasn’t faded one bit. I can’t be sure, but I think he’s still attracted to me too. I curse inwardly as I realize what he’s done. With just a few words he’s turned the tables. Now I’m the one off balance. “The way I see it, you have two choices: answer the question, or turn yourself over to my mercy.” I keep my voice low as I lean closer until I’m hovering over him, my hair spilling down over my shoulders.

Kevin has to tilt his face upward to look at me. “Mercy.” He says it like a plea.

That one word settles in my belly, twisting into a ball of intense heat. I want him in a way that is totally new and totally undeniable. I’m afraid I might start crying, faced with wanting him so much and knowing I can’t have him. Before I can fall apart, I climb the rest of the way onto the bed, then straddle him. His eyes grow wide. Normally the blue of his eyes reminds me of the ocean, or steel when he’s in his deadly calm mood. But not now. The only thing I can possibly compare them to is a flash of uncontrollable lightning that’s ready to burn anything in its path.

“You asked for it.” I grin devilishly and dive in to tickle his side.

I’m rewarded with a breathless laugh as he squirms beneath me. “Lexi!”

“Sorry, Kevin, you should have answered the question.” I tickle harder.

His face is turning red, but he’s smiling and laughing as he struggles to get a hold of my wrists. We both know if he wanted to stop me, he could. I just don’t think he wants to. We’re squirming around, both laughing like hyenas when the dorm door opens and Stephanie freezes in the doorway. I turn my head to her just in time to see her jaw drop, leaving her mouth gaping in a perfect O of surprise. She shuts the door without a word, which only makes me laugh harder.

Once my fit of laughter finally settles a bit, Kevin catches my face in his hands and the entire world freezes. “For the record, I think you’re a lot of things, but shallow isn’t one of them.”

“Like what?” I whisper.

He purses his lips to the side. “Hmm, like stubborn.”

I gasp and try to wiggle out of his grasp. When I can’t, I reach down and tickle his side again.

Kevin manages to keep a straight face, but I can see he’s fighting for. “And let’s not forget persistent. Or maybe just pesky.”

“Is that right?” I glare and tickle harder. “I think you are confusing your qualities with mine.”

I continue tickling and finally his straight face dissolves into hearty laughter. He catches my wrists in his hands. “All right, all right. You win.”

Before I can ask him what my prize is, the door flies open again. This time, when I turn my head I see that Stephanie has the RA with her. “See! He’s not her bodyguard, he’s her boyfriend. She shouldn’t be able to have him staying in here.”

Kevin lets go of my wrists, grabs me by the waist and lifts me off of him, setting me beside him on the bed. Freaking Stephanie ruins everything. “If you’d like,” I tell her, “I’d be happy to do to you what I was doing to him to prove that he is not my boyfriend.”

Shock, then outrage flashes across Stephanie’s face in rapid succession. “Why, I never—”

“You’re right. You never. Because you’re far too uptight to goof off and have a good time. Which is all we were doing.”

The RA narrows her eyes at me. “That’s enough, Alexis. And Stephanie, I do have to agree, it looked like they were just horsing around, not...you know.” She blushes.

Stephanie lets out a screech like a banshee. “I swear to God, I hate you! I
will
get rid of you one of these days, just wait.” With that, she turns and storms away.

After she’s gone, the adviser turns to me once more. “Please do try not to antagonize her. Otherwise, it’s going to be quite a long year.” Then she leaves too, and Kevin and I are alone again, but my good mood is ruined.

“Hey.” Kevin lightly touches my shoulder. “I forgot to add sassy to the list of things you are.”

I summon half a smile, but my heart isn’t in it.

“So are you going to tell me why you were worried that you might be shallow? Which you aren’t, by the way.”

I scoot back on the bed until my back is against the wall and draw my knees up to my chest. I rest my head on top of them and hug my arms around my shins. “I was just thinking about what Mrs. Blessing said after my lesson yesterday, about needing to look beneath the surface. I thought you were awful because you just took your job too seriously, and it took me a while to realize there was something motivating you.”

“Nah, I’m just a hardass.” Kevin gives me a wry grin, but we both know he’s full of shit.

“And it’s more than that. I’ve been so angry at my family for so long, because I’ve been so tired of hearing that I have to be quiet for my mother’s sake. I felt like it meant they didn’t actually care about
me
, I was just a means to an end. That I didn’t really matter for myself, but only for the role I could fill. That sounds stupid, right?”

Kevin stares at me intently. His face is rough with a dark ring of stubble around his jaw, but his gaze is excruciatingly tender. “Not at all. Everyone deserves to feel valued, Lexi.”

I shift, uncomfortable under the weight of his gaze. “I guess I’ve just never felt like I’m enough. More like my family just had to make do with me.”

“And it’s okay to feel that way, but I don’t think that’s how they feel. Have you talked to them since you’ve been here? How’s your mother doing in the program Axel got her into?”

“I talked to Dad the other day. He said she’s settling in well so far but it will take a bit before we can really see any measurable results.”

“Maybe that’s true for you, too. You’re starting to see things differently, and that will change you. But it might take time to really see results. This college thing is new; you’ve got to give it time. Once you’ve settled in here, everything might not feel like such a clusterfuck.”

“And if I give it time, and it still does?” I both hate and love how perceptive he is. I didn’t have to say it, but he saw the truth. College is not at all what I expected it to be. I feel like my illusions have been shattered and now, I’m floundering around wondering who I am and what the hell I’m doing here.

—-♥—-

L
exi

The second week of classes goes a bit better than the first. Maybe Kevin was right and I just needed time to settle in here. Megan wasn’t in English class, and I’m worried about her. I even stopped by her room, but her roommate said she hadn’t seen her. Otherwise, though, things have gone well. I hate that it took Mrs. Blessing’s reprimand to point it out to me, but I’m starting to see just how good of a horse Vandal is. She does everything I ask of her without complaint, which lets me really focus on my own posture, and I feel like I’m making great strides.

Of course, I also feel a bit guilty for how dismissive I was of her, so I’ve been spending lots of extra time at the barn spoiling her. Saturdays are a free riding day when they aren’t being used for make-up classes, and I want to check out the trails that are behind the equestrian center. I’ve been agreeable to everything Kevin’s asked of me all week, giving him an easy job of protecting me, so I’m hoping he’ll agree to let me go explore.

I look up from my book. “I was thinking of heading down to the barn.”

Kevin nods without looking away from his laptop. We’re both in what have become our regular positions. Me at my desk and him on my bed. Stephanie’s absence has also become a regular thing, and I’m not complaining. “Just give me a minute to finish this up. Some of the more in-depth background checks I’ve requested are finally fucking ready and I want to look over them.”

I bite my lip, then decide to just go for it. “I wanted to take a ride on the trails, and so I need to go before it gets too late. Dark, you know?”

Kevin levels his gaze at me like he wants to protest, then lets out a long sigh. “All right, let’s go. But you’ll take your phone, and stay on the trail.”

“Of course.”

“And if you’re gone more than an hour, I’m sending out the cavalry.”

I’d hoped to do one of the longer trails, but I don’t want to push my luck. “Okay.”

As always, Kevin is in the lead when we head out of my room, making sure the way is clear for me.

I hear his curse before I can see what’s set him off.

Kevin darts forward in one swift motion, pinning Tanner against the wall. The muscles in Kevin’s arm twitch with either force or restraint, I’m not sure which. “What the fuck are you doing here? I warned you not to come near her again.”

My heart is doing jumping jacks in my ribcage and my breaths come in short, worried bursts. If someone sees Kevin, he might get in trouble. I lightly touch his shoulder. “Kevin.”

“Get back in the room. Shut and lock the door,” Kevin growls at me.

Everything in me wants to protest, but I stifle it and do as I’m told. This is why Kevin is here. It’s his job, and like it or not, I’ve got to let him do it.