Only His (22 page)

“You're taking his side?”

“I'm saying you don't get to dictate the terms of his choices.”

“All she did was tell him the truth. She didn't want to talk about her past. She told him he wouldn't accept
it and he promised he would. Nothing changed about her, except he now has new information.”

“That makes him wrong?”

“He shouldn't have said he would be okay with anything she told him.”

“Okay, I'll accept that,” he said. “But just because Will doesn't like that Jo spent years in prison, for a crime she
did
commit, let's remember, doesn't make him a bad guy.”

“Maybe,” she said, grumbling. “I don't like it, though.”

“Neither do I,” Tucker said. “He's unhappy, you're unhappy. It doesn't make for a comfortable working situation.”

This was the second good point Tucker had made in as many minutes.

“I should probably stop glaring at him,” she admitted.

“That would help.”

“It's not professional.”

“True.”

“This is not a time to be agreeable,” she told him.

He put down his ice cream and faced her. “Jo's your friend and you're being loyal to her. That's great. Will is my friend. I'm staying loyal to him. You're right, what Jo did happened a long time ago, but it's still relevant. He doesn't talk much about his childhood, but I do know his dad was in and out of jail when Will was a kid. That can't have been easy. Jo telling him about her past probably pushed some buttons.”

She hadn't considered that. “You could be right.”

He grinned. “Let me know when you decide.”

 

J
O FINISHED UP
at the bar. It was after two in the morning. She was usually home by now, but these days she found herself working later and later.

She still couldn't shake the feeling of sadness, but at least she'd let go the sense of impending doom. She no longer believed she was going to be run out of town at any second. Mayor Marsha's kindness had gone a long way to dissipate her fear. Her friends were faithful and supportive. Getting over Will would be an ongoing journey, but at least she would take it to where she belonged.

She locked the front door and walked through the quiet streets to her house. The nights were colder these days. The days shorter. Fall had arrived. There was already snow on the mountains. Fool's Gold was beautiful in every season, but she thought it was at its best in winter.

A police car drove by. The female officer waved at Jo, who waved back. Twinkling lights beckoned from the windows of Morgan's Books. The flags that hung from the streetlights were decorated with turkeys and horns of plenty. She'd already received three different invitations for Thanksgiving.

Home, she thought, telling herself that contentment would be enough. This was home.

She turned onto her street and crossed to her house. As she walked up the path, something moved on her porch. The shadow stepped into the light and became a man.

Will.

The harsh bulb wasn't kind. He looked as bad as she felt. Tired, drawn, sad. Or maybe that was just her
mind's way of trying to make her feel better. Maybe he wasn't hurt at all. Maybe he was leaving and he'd just stopped by to make sure she knew she wasn't good enough for him.

She squared her shoulders. He might have battered her heart, but he wasn't going to break her.

She climbed the steps and stopped in front of him.

“I need to talk to you,” he said.

“What more is there to say?” she asked coldly.

“You told me about your past,” he told her. “I want you to hear about mine.”

She believed in being fair, so she nodded once and unlocked the door.

When they were inside, she motioned for him to take a seat on the sofa. She stayed far away, choosing the safety of the club chair by the fireplace.

“Go ahead.”

Will had shrugged off his jacket. He wore a chambray shirt and worn jeans. His hair needed cutting and he hadn't shaved that day. Scruffy, she thought, trying to be scornful. Only he looked good and she was painfully glad to see him.

Maybe he was going to tell her he'd been wrong, her heart whispered. Maybe he was sorry. She told herself not to hope, but it was difficult not to wish him back into caring about her.

He leaned forward, his elbows resting on his thighs, his hands hanging loose. Instead of looking at her, he stared at the floor.

“My dad was one of those guys who could charm anyone,” he began, his voice low. “Women loved him, especially my mom. She would do anything for him.
God, she loved him. I loved him, too, but I figured out pretty fast he wasn't like other dads. He didn't have a regular job. Instead he was always looking for his next chance at easy money.”

He paused, then glanced at her. “Easy money. That's what he called it. He was too good to work for someone else. He used to say men like him were meant for better things than a factory job. If he'd put half as much effort into something that paid regularly rather than chasing the next scam, our lives would have been a whole lot better.” He cleared his throat. “He was a con artist. My father cheated honest people out of their money. He was in jail more than he was out, but he never learned, never changed. When he got out, he already had a mark in mind.”

Jo folded her arms across her chest. “That must have been difficult for you.”

“It was. I wanted to move away, to never see him again, but my mom wouldn't listen. She loved him and was convinced one day he would change. He broke her heart over and over again with his damn promises. She always believed him, no matter what I said. I vowed I wouldn't be like him. I would always do the right thing. And I promised myself I wouldn't be like her. I wouldn't allow myself to be tricked over and over again.”

She felt a chill and closed her eyes. So much for him knowing he'd been wrong. So much for any hope that they could work this out.

“I don't believe people change,” he told her. “I saw that in my dad and with his friends. They weren't interested in being other than what they were. Jail time
didn't do anything except give them time to plan the next con. When you told me what you'd done, I couldn't believe it. Here I'd gone and fallen for someone just like him. I was my mother all over again.”

The unfairness of the words made her want to stand up and scream her defense. But it wouldn't matter. Will saw what he wanted to see. It just wasn't the whole picture.

“Only I was wrong.”

The soft words barely penetrated. She stared at him.

“I was wrong,” he repeated, straightening. “You changed. You're not that teenager anymore. You've made a life for yourself here. I can see your character in everything you do. You're not like him.” His gaze intensified. “I'm sorry, Jo. I shouldn't have said what I did. I reacted harshly, without thinking.”

She let his words wash over her as she tried to figure out what she was feeling. Relief, certainly. Maybe a little hope. But she'd trusted him and it had hurt when she'd revealed her darkest secret and he'd left. Sure, he was back now, but how could she trust him not to leave again?

“I believe in you,” he continued. “I believe in us. I want this to work. Please give me a second chance to prove myself to you.”

For once there weren't any tears. Resignation settled on her as she accepted the truth of the situation—she wasn't willing to be vulnerable again, to be hurt again. Being alone was easier.

“I'm sorry, Will,” she said, rising to her feet. “I resisted getting involved with you for a reason. I knew it wouldn't work out. I didn't want to tell you about
what happened to me, about what I did, because I knew you wouldn't be able to deal with it. I was right. You couldn't.”

He stood. “No. I don't accept that. I was a jerk. I handled it badly. But I figured that out. I'm here. Isn't that what relationships are about? Working things out together?”

“In theory. The truth isn't that simple or easy. I've been alone a long time now, Will. And maybe that's for the best.” She held up her hand. “I'm not punishing you. I'm just accepting that having a man in my life isn't going to happen for me. It's better for me to be alone.”

His mouth twisted. “Safe,” he said. “Risk nothing, lose nothing.”

Anger started deep inside. She welcomed it, knowing the emotion would give her strength.

“Easy for you to judge,” she told him. “You weren't the one who was told you weren't good enough.”

He swore under his breath. “So, that's it? I don't get to make a mistake? You expect me to forgive you, but I don't get the same treatment?”

“I didn't hurt you. I hurt someone else a long time ago. What I did had nothing to do with you. But you did hurt me. You extrapolated from an event you had no part of and used that as an excuse to walk out. We both have our own demons to deal with. Which one of us is going to get hurt next?”

She waited for him to yell at her, to escalate the fight. Instead his shoulders slumped, as if he'd just been loaded down with a weight he couldn't carry.

“Don't,” he said quietly. “Don't do this, Jo. I know
you're pissed and you have every right to be. If I could take it back, I would. If I could not screw up, I would. You're not my dad. I get that. But at first, I was so surprised by what you said. I thought…” He shook his head. “I guess it doesn't matter what I thought. I can't convince you. You're going to see what you want to see.”

He started to the door, his steps uneven. When he got there, he turned back to her.

“You're wrong about one thing. It's not that I got mad and handled it badly. That could happen to anyone. It's what I did next that says who I am. I wanted to leave town—I asked Tucker for a transfer to another job. But I couldn't go and I couldn't let go. I worked it through. While I hurt you, it wasn't on purpose. I've admitted my mistake, I've learned from it and I'm doing my best to apologize.”

He opened the door. “I'm not the best-looking guy around and there are plenty richer. But I'm still a good man who loves you. I even like your damn cat. It's not the screwing up that defines a person, Jo, it's what he does afterward that says who he is. You know that better than anyone, because you're the one who said that to me.”

With that, he walked out.

She heard his steps on the porch, the slight hesitation in his stride from his limp. Then that faded and there was only silence. Something warm brushed against her leg and she reached down to stroke Jake. The cat stared up at her, his yellow eyes seeing far more than usual.

“Don't,” she whispered to herself. “Don't say any
thing. I can't forgive him. I can't let him back in my life. What will he do the next time?”

There was no answer—only silence and a hard, thick pressure on her chest. She couldn't breathe, couldn't speak, could only feel the emptiness that was her future.

Even as she wanted to go to him, her mind screamed out that she couldn't trust him. That he would hurt her again and no one was worth those tears. Her heart whispered that, yes, crying was inevitable. It was impossible to feel love without also feeling pain. But the price was worth it.
He
was worth it. That if she let him go, she would regret it for the rest of her life.

The need to protect herself battled with the hunger of her heart. Twisted and torn, her heart fought rational thought. Then she was moving. She flung open the front door and raced across the porch. She hurried down the steps, along the path until she reached the sidewalk. Frantically she looked in both directions, trying to figure out where he was.

Then she saw him nearly at the end of the block.

“Will!”

She called out loudly, aware that it was late and she wasn't being a good neighbor, but unable to stop herself. The figure in the distance paused.

She ran toward him, nearly flying as she covered the distance. When she got close, he held out his arms and welcomed her home.

She flung herself at him and hung on as if she would never let go. He held her even tighter. Once again she couldn't breathe, but this time it was for the best reason of all.

“Will, I…” she began.

He silenced her with a kiss. “Later.”

“But I have to tell you—”

“No, you don't.” He released her from the hug but kept his arm around her. “Come on. It's cold and you're not wearing a jacket.”

She stepped in front of him and grabbed him by the shoulders. “I'm trying to tell you I love you and all you can say is I'm not wearing a jacket?”

He smiled then. A slow, sexy smile that made her stomach turn over and every part of her burn.

“I love you, too, Jo. Let's go home.”

T
UCKER HEARD A FAMILIAR
sound from outside the trailer. Tires on dirt and gravel. Funny how he could pick out those particular tires from all the others. Not funny in a good way, though, he thought, wishing the construction trailer had a back door.

With nowhere to run, he was forced to stay behind his desk and hope for the best. After all, he was a grown man. He could stand up to what was outside. He didn't have to be afraid.

But all the logic in the world didn't stop him from wincing as he heard footsteps on the stairs, followed by the turning of the handle. He braced himself for the onslaught.

The door opened and Mayor Marsha stepped inside.

“Good morning, Tucker,” she said cheerfully.

“Ma'am.”

She was as well dressed as ever, in one of her suits, the skirt hitting exactly at the middle of her knee. Her white hair was in that puffy do she seemed to like so much. Despite the warmth in her gaze, he knew this wasn't a social call.

He stood and walked toward the coffeepot. “The gold is all excavated,” he said, pouring her a cup.

“Cream,” she said when he held it out.

He added cream, stirred, then took it over to her.

She'd settled at the small table in the back. He passed her the coffee. For a second, he thought about making a run for it, but knew that wouldn't work. She would simply hunt him down. Better to face her now and get it over with.

“Thank you,” she said before sipping the coffee. “Having the gold gone must be making your life here more peaceful.”

“I didn't love the tourists.”

“I imagine not.” She put the mug back on the table. “I've been keeping track of the progress you're making on the site. Impressive. I have every confidence this facility is going to be an excellent addition to the Fool's Gold community.”

“We appreciate the support from you and the city council. Some cities wouldn't want the casino so close.”

Mayor Marsha smiled. “I'm sure that's true, but I'm not concerned. If anyone becomes difficult, our police department is more than capable of handling the situation. The additional tax revenue is more than worth the effort. The occupancy taxes for the hotel alone are going to fund a new high school. Children are our future, as they say.”

“So I've heard,” he murmured, wondering when she would drop her next bombshell. Unless she was here to nag him about Cat's giant vagina. A gift he'd yet to figure out how to undo. Not that he'd tried especially hard. He frowned as he realized he hadn't seen much of Cat since her arrival. And to think that at one point in his life, she'd been his reason for breathing. Time really did heal.

“The last two years have taught me a valuable les
son,” the mayor told him. “We haven't been vigilant enough in our planning here in Fool's Gold. We've let outside events guide us. That disastrous reality show is just one example. Now the gold find. It's not that we could have predicted either, but we should have been better prepared. To that end, I'm starting a committee of business leaders. People who understand about forecasting and projections. Our purpose will be to provide a new kind of leadership for us all. I'm looking for suggestions for myself and for the city council.”

“Sounds like a good idea,” he said, wondering when she would get to the part that would make him uncomfortable.

“I'm glad you think so. I'd like you to be a part of the group. Perhaps even head it up.”

She was good, Tucker thought. He hadn't seen that one coming.

“I appreciate the invitation, but I'm not the right person.”

“Why not?”

“I'm not a permanent resident. Once the job site is up and running, I'll head on to the next project. I'm in town a year at most.”

The mayor pressed her lips together. “I don't understand. I was under the impression this was the last job you'd be running. That once this was done, you would be taking over the company.”

She was better than good at getting information, Tucker told himself. She was practically a witch.

“How did you know that?”

The older woman sighed. “I know everything,
Tucker. I would have thought you'd know that by now. Aren't you taking over the company?”

“Yes, but—”

“And once you're in control, you can locate the headquarters anywhere?”

“Sure, but—”

“And isn't it true that you're not completely happy with living in Chicago and were thinking of moving the office somewhere else?”

He sprang to his feet. “Wait a minute. I haven't talked with anyone about that. I haven't even made up my mind.”

She stared at him pointedly until he settled back in his chair.

“Fool's Gold would be an excellent place for you to settle your company. We're very supportive of business. Housing is reasonable, the schools are some of the best in the country. You should think about it.”

He couldn't get past her knowing things he'd barely articulated to himself. He hadn't told Will or Nevada. He'd discussed moving the company with his father. Once. Three years ago. In Argentina.

“Who are you?” he demanded.

“I'm someone who pays attention. Please, don't go reading any more into what I said than that. It's obvious you're looking for something more than the vagabond lifestyle you've known since you were a child. You find the town charming. You came here because of Nevada. Now that the two of you are together, thinking you want to stay is the next logical step.”

If he hadn't already used up the drama of jumping to his feet, he would have done it again. While he couldn't
disagree with anything she'd said, even he hadn't put all that together in a reasonable way.

But he wasn't staying. He'd never planned on staying. Staying meant taking things to the next level with Nevada. He wasn't interested in that. He didn't believe in happy endings or forever. Love was…

“I can see by your expression you're not ready to commit to being in town longer than the job requires,” the older woman said. “I hope you'll change your mind. You need us, Tucker, even more than we need you.”

With that, she collected her purse and left.

He continued to sit at the small table, trying to figure out what had just happened. Talk about unexpected and just plain weird, he thought. Sure, he liked Nevada and he liked the town, but staying? Moving the company here? That wasn't going to happen.

He wasn't looking for permanent. Not personally or professionally. Sure, he would be taking over the company, but he still planned to go around the world for the big jobs. Maybe not to be in charge, but he wasn't going to become some guy, stuck in an office. He needed more.

As for Nevada, he knew he'd screwed up there. Let things get too far. He'd been trying to back off before, but then Cat had happened. As always, having her around was like dealing with a natural disaster. He'd reacted to the situation and now Mayor Marsha thought things between him and Nevada were more than they were.

That made him wonder if Nevada thought the same thing.

He stood and returned to his desk. But once he was there, he found himself restless. He swore.

He didn't want to hurt her. She was great and he really liked being with her. She got him and he got her. They were a good team, both in and out of bed. He liked watching her move, he liked making her laugh. He wanted to be around her.

Sure, he trusted her more than he'd ever trusted another woman and maybe, if things had been different, she would have been the one. But they weren't different. He knew what would happen if he gave in to love. He knew the price and he wasn't going to pay it. Not again. Not for anyone.

 

T
UCKER'S LONG MORNING
turned into an even longer afternoon. Nevada showed up after lunch, flushed and chilled from working with the guys. She talked about how the digging was going and which pipes had been delivered. Rather than pay attention, he watched her, trying to figure out how badly he would miss her when he was gone.

“Are you even listening?” she demanded.

“Sure. To every word.”

“I don't think I believe you. You have the strangest look on your face.”

Will's arrival was the perfect interruption. His second in command bounced into the trailer, grinning like a fool.

Nevada glanced at her watch. “Nearly two. Guess you're not an early riser anymore.”

“I called.”

“You left a cryptic message on the voice mail saying you'd be late. Not exactly the same thing.”

“Good enough for the likes of you two.” Will crossed the small trailer, grabbed Nevada by the waist and spun her in a tight circle. “Congratulate me. I'm engaged.”

“Woohoo!” Nevada flung her arms around him. “Finally. I was tired of being mad at you.”

Will laughed and released her, then walked over to Tucker and held out his hand.

“I'm the luckiest guy ever,” Will told him.

Tucker did his best to conceal his shock. Will engaged? They'd always been nomads together.

“Congratulations,” Tucker said automatically.

“When did this happen?” Nevada asked, hugging him again.

“Last night. Technically, early this morning.” Will laughed. “She made me work for it, though. I'll tell you that.”

“Married.” Nevada clapped her hands together. “I'm not sure Jo is the big wedding type. Are you two going to do something in town or run off and get married?”

“Whatever she wants is good with me.”

Will sounded happy. Or whatever was beyond happy, Tucker thought, confused by the rapid change of events.

“You'll be staying here,” he said.

“Yup.” Will chuckled. “If I don't, Jo's gonna hunt me down. Gotta love that in a woman.” He sighed. “I'll finish the job, then look for work in town.” Still looking pleased with himself, he laughed. “I guess I'm giving my two-year notice.”

Will leaving the company? Just like that? For a woman?

Nevada walked to her desk and picked up a stack of magazines. “My sisters left these for me,” she said, waving the bridal magazines at him. “Want to look them over?”

Tucker waited for his friend to make the sign of the cross and then run for the hills. Instead Will grabbed them.

“Sure,” he said with a chuckle. “That'll get her attention. Hey, is there a jewelry store in town? I need to buy my woman a ring. A big one.”

“I know just the place. Jenel's Gems. Jenel will be able to help you find the prefect ring.”

Will tucked the magazines under his arm, then headed for the door. “I'm out of here, boss. See you tomorrow.”

With that, he was gone.

Tucker stared at the closed door, not sure what had just happened. Everything was getting out of hand and somehow he had to figure out a way to stop it.

 

“T
HIS IS REALLY SUDDEN
,” Nevada said, not sure how she felt about Cat's announcement. Despite everything that had happened, Nevada wasn't sure she was ready for Cat to leave. They'd barely become friends. Well, as much as anyone could be a friend with Cat.

“I've created and now it's time for me to move on,” Cat told her.

They were in front of the Gold Rush Ski Lodge and Resort. A long, dark limo idled next to them, the driver and Herbert, her assistant, already loading piles of luggage.

“You know the sculpture is finished,” Cat said. “You'll be the one to present it to the town.”

“Lucky me.”

“I knew you'd enjoy being the one.”

“You'll miss the unveiling,” Nevada reminded her, thinking there was a whole lifetime of things she would rather do than be in charge of giving her hometown a giant vagina.

“I've done the important part,” Cat told her, then touched her shoulder. “Come with me.”

“Cat, you know I can't.”

“No.” Cat's green eyes darkened. “You don't want to. There's a difference.”

Nevada bit her lower lip. “I'm sorry. I know this is important to you, but there's no way I can be in that kind of relationship with you.”

“Your loss,” Cat said lightly.

“Tell me about it.”

Just then Cody, one of the college guys who rented from Nevada, walked up.

“Hey,” he said, handing Herbert a duffel bag. He slid into the back of the limo.

Nevada looked from the open door back to Cat.

“No way.”

Cat's smile turned mischievous. “He's not you, but he gets me through the night.”

“He's a boy.”

“Yes. All that youthful enthusiasm and energy. He's good for at least three times a night and I'm teaching him exactly how to please me. There are worse fates.”

“He didn't give notice that he was leaving,” Nevada
said, knowing she should probably be more worried about Cody's future than her rental income.

“He'll be back and, in the meantime, I'll pay his rent.”

Cat leaned in and kissed her. Nevada didn't turn away in time, or maybe she felt she shouldn't. Either way, Cat's soft lips pressed against hers, then lingered for a heartbeat before she drew away.

Cat sighed. “If I could convince you.”

“It's not just the girl thing,” Nevada admitted. “It's that I want something permanent. Like what my parents had. A forever kind of love. My sisters have found it and I'm hoping it's out there for me, too. You're amazing, Cat, but you don't do long term. You can't. Not with your gift.”

Cat's eyes filled with tears. “You're right,” she whispered. “My art always comes first. Eventually I'd feel confined and my work would suffer.”

Nevada realized that for once, they were both speaking the truth. Even if she was interested in Cat, the other woman couldn't give her what she wanted.

“I'll miss you,” Nevada told her.

“And I'll miss you.”