Passion By Control (Passion Series Book 2) (26 page)

“No!” I reached across the table to take his hand. “No, you’re not weak and you’ll never be useless. You need to adjust to life as a human again but that doesn’t mean you aren’t strong. Please stop talking like this.”

“I need to get out of here. I want to go home. Fuck, I can’t go home, I’m fucking food for the others now.” He turned his troubled pale gaze on me. “Take me to you house, please? I need to sleep. I feel so tired. Fuck, see, it’s happening already. I’m weakening; this being human is going to make me soft.”

“Fabian stop being so ridiculous; you’re tired because we both need to sleep. We haven’t slept enough and it’s been a traumatic morning so far. You have gone through a lot. I’ll take you home with me and we’ll get some sleep ok? I’m sure you’ll feel better once you get some rest.”

I hated to see him so unsure of himself. He had been so confident, bossy, a real arrogant arse and now he wasn’t. I could only hope that as he adjusted to life as a human, that he would start to regain some of his confidence.

“Have you finished eating? If you have, we’ll go now.” I said.

Fabian pushed the rest of his food aside. He stood and silently followed me from the fast food restaurant. My heart ached to see his face. He looked so down and it was obvious the reality of his situation was just hitting home for him. I had been worried about him being angry with me for bringing him back and possibly leaving me, but now I was more concerned about his state of mind. He might never adjust to life as a human. He’d been vampire for a long time. It was who he was and now it was gone.

Fabian

Fabian followed Sirene into the house she shared with Cassandra and Chloe. He wasn’t really looking forward to seeing the other ladies given he used to mind control and fuck them a lot. That was until his little witch had cast a spell which made it impossible to touch them or do anything with them, without it causing him extreme pain. He was relieved to see it was still a bit early for them and neither of Sirene’s housemates were around. She headed straight for the stairs leading up to the bedrooms, so he followed her and into her room.

He’d only been in there a couple of minutes when he suddenly felt pressure building up and a level of discomfort he hadn’t felt in over 500 years. Fuck he needed to go to the bathroom.

“Toilet.” He mumbled, stumbling out the door and into the hallway again, heading for the bathroom.

Sirene followed him out and he spun around on her. “For fuck sakes woman, I don’t need a hand ok? It might have been awhile but I still remember what to do.” He snapped, storming inside and slamming the door shut on her shocked face.

Once he’d relieved himself, he studied his image in the mirror. He basically looked the same, just his complexion had a healthier glow, but that would be because he now had a beating heart.

Fuck he wasn’t sure he could do this. He wanted his old life back. Facing a future as a human terrified him, although he couldn’t admit that to Sirene. Being vampire had been his identity in this world and now it was gone. Plus he was going to age. He wasn’t sure he wanted to see himself slowly turning into an old man, becoming feeble and slow.

No, he might be alive, but he didn’t want to be. Sirene had brought him back because she claimed to love him although he couldn’t fathom why, but this life now as human was an existence. He faced a future of uncertainty and he hated that.

Finally he left the bathroom to find her waiting for him and he paused for a moment before brushing past her to go back into her bedroom.

She came up behind him, her arms closing around him and he sighed, surprised to feel his body responding to her closeness. Despite what had happened and him no longer being vampire, it seemed his body still recognised hers, no matter what he was and he could feel his cock hardening in his jeans.

Damn, maybe he should fuck her. See how sex as a human compared to sex as a vampire. Of course he’d had sex before he was turned nearly 600 years ago, but he couldn’t remember what sex pre vampire was like.

With his cock now straining up hard and insistent, he suddenly wanted to fuck her and see what it was like. He wasn’t sure what he’d feel now he didn’t have the blood to add to the experience. The blood, feeding while fucking increased the sexual excitement and pleasure for both vampire and human. Would the sex still be good without that? Shit, could he even please her without the orgasm she always had when he bit into her?

Fabian grabbed Sirene’s hands and slid them down his body until he reached the top of his thighs. He slowly moved them inwards, and held them pressed over his groin where there wasn’t a chance in hell that she couldn’t tell, he was as hard as an iron bar inside his jeans.

He heard the hitch in her breathing behind him and he rotated until he faced her. “I want you Sirene, here, now. I wish to fuck you, but I will admit that I’m scared.” He felt colour heat his cheeks and he cursed this bloody being human thing.

“Why on earth would you be scared Fabian? Although your ego probably doesn’t need me to point this out to you, but trust me when I say there is nothing wrong with your sexual performance. Sex with you is intense, erotic, mind blowing and the best sex I’ve ever had, so there really is no need for you to be scared about it.” She told him.

He raised troubled eyes to her. “You’re forgetting one important difference. I was a vampire when I fucked you. I’m human now and let’s face it; human men can’t keep it up as long. They often can’t fuck as long, and how many human men do you know who can come and not go soft? It’s quite normal for a vampire to fuck and fuck and fuck without losing their hard on. I’m worried I’ll now be a huge disappointment.”

“You’ll never be a disappointment to me. I love you. Come, now you’re human, make love to me, don’t just fuck me.”

At her words, he felt his cock twitch and he groaned. God did she have to talk of love? He wasn’t worthy of it. He was a bastard, he’d been a bastard as a vampire, and the fact that he felt like he was grieving his lost lifestyle, meant he was still a bastard. Being human didn’t change that.

He didn’t want to hurt her. He didn’t want to admit even to himself how much she meant to him. He didn’t want her pinning her hopes on a happily ever after relationship since he had no idea where his life was going now, what he would do. Now he was human, he felt like a boat adrift at sea. He had no purpose in life anymore. He certainly couldn’t offer Sirene the kind of relationship she probably wanted.

“Stop overthinking this and come to bed.” She said and as he watched, she began to remove her clothes.

As each item of clothing ended up on the floor until she stood before him in just her bra and matching panties, Fabian’s breathing began to rasp loudly, as he struggled to draw air into his suddenly constricted lungs.

Damn she was so beautiful, he wanted her badly and with fingers that shook he began to hastily tear his own clothes off, not stopping until he stood before her naked.

He reached out to unclasp her bra and hooked his fingers into her panties, quickly sliding them down her legs until she could step out of them. When she too was naked, he pulled her into his arms, his lips crashing down on hers, forcing his tongue into her mouth.

While he kissed her with unrestrained passion, his hands began to roam over her body, cupping her breasts, flicking his thumbs over her nipples until they were hard peaks.

He continued on down her body, pushing her legs apart until he could slip a hand between her thighs, plunging two fingers deep inside her, groaning when he felt how wet she was.

“Fuck Sirene, you’re soaked and dammit you’re testing my self-control. I’m not used to losing control.” He ground out, his heart hammering hard in his chest, and he had to wonder if it could take the punishment it was now receiving with him being human. That would be ironic if he had a bloody heart attack while having sex.

“Oh my god.” She moaned as he drove his fingers into her, twisting them inside to graze over her special spot, while his thumb brushed her clit. He could feel it swelling under his touch and her whole body trembled with her growing excitement.

“My beauty.” He gasped, suddenly swinging her into his arms, tossing her onto the bed before coming down on top of her.

He spread her out to him, diving down her body until he could press his lips up against her dripping cunt. Fuck she was beautiful. Sexy, hot and she was driving him crazy with the scent of her arousal rising around him. He was so hard for her; all he wanted was to get inside her as quickly as possible.

“Oh god Sirene. I need you, I want you, I have to have you. I don’t have the control to draw this out right now. There will be time for that later.” He nudged her legs further apart and rose, ready to drive deep into her when she suddenly stopped him.

“Wait, condom, you need a condom.” She gasped.

“What? What the fuck woman? A fucking condom? I don’t cover my fucking dick ok?” He snapped.

“Well you do if you want to have sex with me. You’re not a vampire anymore and I’m not risking pregnancy for you.” She glared at him.

“Pregnancy? What the hell? Oh for fuck sakes, is this shit I have to worry about now I’m fucking human again?” He groaned.

“Well, not in my case. I’m just messing with you. I’m on the pill.” She gave him a sly grin and he growled at her.

“Fuck you.” He lowered his lips to hers, biting into her full bottom lip. As he nipped the soft flesh as punishment for teasing him about birth control, he angled his hips, nudging the head of his cock against her hot, wet opening. With a growl squeezing past his clenched teeth, he slammed into her, not stopping until he battered up against her cervix.

He froze, feeling her contract around him as he waited for her body to adjust to his invasion. When he felt her soften and relax under him, he began to thrust into her with long, slow, deep strokes. Fuck, she felt amazing. She was so hot and wet but he wasn’t going to be able to last very long. The feel of her cunt clamping around his cock was pushing him rapidly towards his release, but he didn’t want to come yet. He wanted to drag this out as long as he could. Slowing his pace, he began a leisurely plunge and slow retreat, in an effort to bring them down a bit, to cool their need to come.

Sirene whimpered, writhing under him, arching her back and tilting her hips up as she tried to get him to move faster. She was driving him crazy, rubbing against him, teasing him and tempting him. When she took him by surprise, sinking her teeth into his shoulder, he groaned and gave up trying to hold back. Bracing his hands either side of her, he began to thrust, his movements rapid and forceful. The pressure was building in him; he couldn’t fight it any more.

“Fuck Sirene. I can’t hold off much longer.”

He heard her gasp, a throaty cry erupting from her lips. Her body stiffened briefly, just before she came apart, her inner walls clamping around him. As she tightened, squeezing him intimately, rhythmically, he felt the flood of her release wash around his cock. That was all it took to push him over the edge and he called her name, his head back, eyes closed as he started to spill inside her, pleasure consuming him with every pump of his release. When he was finally done, he thrust a few more times, his movements lazy before he stilled, turning his head to press his nose into Sirene’s neck, breathing in her sweet scent.

He could feel her still clenching around him, as he lay on her, and his cock responded with a few final jerks of its own. His breath rushed harshly past his lips, his chest heaving. He could hear Sirene’s ragged breathing too and he felt the frantic thundering of her heart which matched his, as they lay together, coming down from their orgasms. This was his first fuck as a human again and it had been quick, but intense. Even now, his body still trembled as he came down from the emotional high.

He yawned, suddenly feeling exhausted. Although the sex had been better than he’d expected, the racing heart, ragged breathing and the overwhelming heaviness of his limbs as fatigue set in, were all reminders of just how much his life had changed. He was human and the question was, could he live out his life this way?

Chapter Fifteen

Sirene

It felt so good to be in Fabian’s arms, to feel the weight of his body pressing me into the mattress. What was going to take some getting used to, was feeling his beating heart and hearing him breathe although right now he was struggling to get his breath back after the amazing sex we’d just had.

He felt so different. His body warm, even when he’d come inside me, it was warm. Not that he’d ever been really cold as a vampire, but he’d definitely been cooler.

I ran my hands over his back; tracing his spine and feeling him shiver under my touch. Slowly I trailed my fingers over his shoulders and back down his spine until I could run my palms over his gorgeous tight ass, feeling it flex under my touch. Obviously he liked what I was doing since I could feel him getting hard inside me again.

“Bloody hell, again? You’re making me hard and I’ll die at this rate. You’ve got to give my poor old heart a break woman. You can do all the work.”

Just when I was wondering what the hell he was talking about, he suddenly rolled over, holding me against his body until I was on top of him. He was still buried inside me, his eyes on me as he thrust up, encouraging me to move.  My eyes drifted over his breathtakingly handsome face, seeing the passion burning in his gaze, his lids heavy, his teeth clamping down on his lip.