Authors: Kathy Belge
If you can honestly answer yes to these questions, chances are this is more than just an infatuation. Of course, sometimes it's hard to tell if it's real love when you're in the middle of it. But If you mostly feel like a better person when you're in his or her presence, then we say it's probably love ... or something like it.
2004
Wedding Bells Are Ringing
Queer marriage has never been recognized by the federal government. We've had commitment ceremonies and, in recent years, have also gained certain domestic partnership rights, but a marriage license has remained a dream. In recent years, however, things have (slowly!) started to change. On February 12, 2004, San Francisco began issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples. Thousands of couples lined up at San Francisco City Hall over Valentine's Day weekend (Kathy and her partner were among them!) to get married. Soon cities around the country followed suit, including Portland, Oregon; New Paltz, New York; and Ashbury Park, New Jersey. However, in subsequent court rulings, all of those marriages were deemed invalid. Today, same sex marriage is legal in several states, including Massachusetts, Vermont, and Iowa. There's still a long fight ahead, but atleast it's now an issue at the forefront of American politics.
Besides taking the SATs, there's not much that is more stressful than meeting your girlfriend or boyfriend's parents for the first time. Here are some tips to ensure that things go smoothly.
The fact that you're in a relationship doesn't mean you can slack off on the romance. No one's waited a lifetime for a boring relationship! Of course, going out to dinner and long walks in the park together may get stale after awhile. And how many dozens of roses does one person need? If you feel like you're falling into a rut, embark on a fun project together. Build a fan site, learn to cook Moroccan food, start a fantasy football team. Don't be afraid to do something different that takes you out of your comfort zone. If she's really into rock climbing, but you're scared of heights, be brave and take a class at the rock climbing gym. Go to an all night rave or try camping, if that's what he loves to do. Be spontaneous. Surprise each other. Get creative. Treat your relationship like a blog or scrapbook that you want to fill up with awesome memories, quirky thoughts, and meaningful experiences.
Being a queer couple definitely has its perks: sharing clothes, making out in the bathroom, endless snuggles. But it can also be a challenge. In some parts of the country, teens are still fighting to be able to take same-sex dates to the prom or even to hold hands on school grounds. In some private schools you can be expelled for having a queer relationship. It's pretty ridiculous. Then there are occasional awkward social moments. Should you grind on him on the dance floor like everyone else is doing with their partners? Should you kiss her hello when she comes off the softball field after a game? You have to think twice before doing things everyone else does freely, which is annoying and unfair.