Ray of Love (Lifestyle by Design Book 3) (11 page)

"Great idea," Steve answered. "Let me know when it's convenient for you. I'll be here for another two weekends."

"Yeah, no worries," Lisa answered. "We really have to go, Pete. Mum just texted. Aaron's screaming again."

With hasty goodbyes, the couple left them to await dessert.

"Steve, I think we need to continue the conversation we were having before Pete and Lisa got here," Faye said after another discussion about nothing in particular as they had their dessert.

"Yeah. I was waiting for you to bring it up. Frankly, I'm a little nervous. You didn't seem very excited about the idea of getting back together."

She reached up to cup a hand on his cheek. "I care about you. You know that. We've had some really good times together. But I'm afraid I've moved on. I'm interested in someone else."

Steve frowned as he grasped the hand on his face, bringing it to his lips. "Are you sure, Faye? We get along really well. We have great chemistry in bed. We've already lived with each other and know each other's quirks …"

She gave him a half-smile and pulled her hand away gently. After comprehending the intensity of her feelings for Ray, she knew that what she and Steve had for a year paled in comparison to it. Steve was a good man. But what they had wasn't strong enough. Not for her.

"Steve, we've been honest with each other so far. I know you think I'm what you want but I'm also sure you're not ready to see yourself with me ten, twenty, thirty years into the future," she reasoned with him.

Steve shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "Faye, I love you. I know we've lived together for a year but I've been busy with my career and I travelled a lot then. While I've thought about a future with you, I'm not yet ready for a permanent commitment. But that doesn't mean I couldn't, or wouldn't go there. Just give me a little bit more time to be absolutely sure about - you know - forever. But right now, I
know
I want to be with you. Isn't that a good start?"

She breathed a sigh of relief.
Thank God he's not that crazy about me.

She looked directly in his eyes. "This other guy I'm interested in, I see us there. In the future. Together," she told him quietly.

He gaped at her for a long moment. "You're in love with him."

She gave him a confirming, conciliatory smile, hoping he wouldn't be too upset.

He looked down on his plate. "I guess I missed my chance."

"You'll find her. Someone you'll love more than me."

He glanced at her with sad eyes. "I hope so."

"I'm sure you meet lots of women during your travels."

"I do. But since I travel so much, there's not much chance of developing a relationship with anyone."

"Well, when you meet 'the one', I'm sure you'll work it out."

His lips curled up, looking resigned. "I'm really happy for you, Faye," he said, holding her hand. "We can still be friends, yes?"

"Of course."

"Will you go with to me Pete and Lisa's before I go back to Adelaide?"

"Um, my relationship with Ray is a little bit complicated at the moment and that won't go down well. Can I let you know later?"

"Sure. Everything okay with the two of you?" Steve sounded suspiciously hopeful.

"We've had a little bit of a misunderstanding but we'll work it out," was all she wanted to divulge to him.

"Ray, huh? Where did you two meet?"

"I've known him for a while. He's Clarise, Jessa and Victor's boss."

Steve's mouth formed an 'O'. "Oh, that Ray."

"Yes."

"Let me pay for my share," Faye insisted.

"No, Faye. Let me get this."

Steve was almost pleading so she gave in. After that, they stood up and got ready to go.

"Thank you for dinner. Hope you enjoy your three weeks back here," she said to him graciously.

"Thanks. Maybe we can catch up again soon. I'd really like for us to stay friends."

"Me too, Steve."

They looked at each other awkwardly for a couple of seconds before Steve enveloped her in a warm hug.

"See you, Faye," he murmured against her hair.

"Bye, Steve," she said, returning his hug.

On their way out of the restaurant, Faye didn't notice the woman who was waving at her, trying to attract her attention. She would have recognised her if she saw her. She worked at Lifestyle by Design.

CHAPTER TEN

Ray trundled into the office kitchen, wondering why he just didn't take the day off. He owned the company, for God's sake. He could come and go as he pleased.

Jessa and Elena were there making their coffee.
 

Great. Just what I needed,
he muttered sarcastically under his breath. He was in a foul mood and didn't relish the idea of making small talk. But he was the boss and he mustn't drag them into his negative state of mind, even though one of them was the best friend of the woman who had a habit of breaking his heart.

"They looked quite sweet together," he heard Elena say to Jessa as they watched dark brown liquid pour into a cup. "I waved to her when they were leaving but she didn't see me —" Elena's voice trailed when she saw him approach.

"Morning, Ray," his hard-working receptionist said. "Had a good weekend?"

"Yes, thanks," he said in an automatic response. "And you girls?"

"Good, thanks," they both replied.

Jessa peered at him. "You okay, Ray? You look a little tired."

He smiled thinly. "Rough night. I'll be fine when I have my coffee."

"Do you want to leave your mug here and I'll make it for you after Jessa's done?" Elena offered.

"No, thanks. I'll do it."

"Okay," Elena said as she proceeded to go back to her workstation. "Jess, say hello to Faye for me."

"Yes, I will. I'll let her know you saw her last night at the restaurant."

"Thanks. Tell her I said her boyfriend's cute."

Jessa chuckled. "I will, assuming it was a boyfriend she was with last night."

"I'd be surprised if it wasn't. She was caressing his face and all."

Each word exchanged by the women was a dagger that dug into Ray's heart.

Fuck, fuck, fuck!
Of course, she was out with Steve last night. By the sounds of it, he's no longer an ex. Well, she can damn well do whatever she wants. I'm done with her. I'm done. No more.

"Ray? Ray?"

He was startled out of his dark musing by Jessa's voice.

"Are you okay?" Jessa asked with concern.

"Sure. I just have some problems running through my head."

"Give me your mug. I'll make your coffee."

He watched as Jessa pushed some buttons on the machine.

"Anything I can do to help?" she asked.

His lips curled crookedly. As long as she and all the rest of them didn't talk about Faye whenever he was around, that would be very helpful. He just wanted to get over her once and for all. And fast.

"I'll be fine, thanks," he answered aloud.

~~~~~~~

He was staring at his computer screen, seeing nothing, when his phone rang. 'Jane' it said.

Again? Damn it.

He rejected her call for the second time that morning. He wasn't ready to hear her voice yet. He resolved not to see her or talk to her until he was confident enough that he wouldn't lose it when he did. It might take a while, but hell, he was determined to strike her out of his heart.

It was of utmost importance. Her best friends worked for him so it would be inevitable that they would bump into each other every once in a while. He needed to be comfortable and unaffected around her so they could go back to the easy, friendly association they had in the past. Sure, it might not get back to the level it was back then, but at least he wouldn't feel like his heart was being torn apart every time her name was mentioned.

In hindsight, it was a very bad idea to have gotten involved with her.

*******

"Hi," Victor, Jessa and Clarise greeted Faye in unison as she joined them for their Monday lunch date.

"Hi," she answered cheerlessly. She didn't even make an effort to hide her despondency.

Crestfallen faces watched her take her seat.

"What's wrong, honey?" Clarise asked softly.

"Can we talk about me last? Maybe I'll feel a little better after you guys have talked about your weekends and I've had something to eat."

Her friends dutifully took turns sharing about their weekends as they ate their lunch. Many minutes later, during a lull in the conversation, Victor asked, "Are you ready to talk, Faye?"

She shrugged. "Let's order coffee first, then I'll talk. And let me get some tissues out."

"Oh, darling, is it that bad?"

She smiled sadly and called the server.

As they waited for their coffees, Jessa commented casually. "Ray's in a bleak mood today."

"Tell me about it," Clarise agreed. "He asked me last week to finish a few things so we could discuss it this morning before he goes to Brisbane. When I asked him what time he wanted to see me, he just barked 'not today'. He didn't even look up, so I just slinked back into my office."

"I know. Elena and I were chatting in the kitchen when he walked in there this morning. I commented that he looked tired and he said he had a rough night. He also seemed so lost in an unpleasant thought I had to call his name a couple of times before he snapped out of it. He must have had a bad weekend."

Faye's heart pounded hard as she listened to her friends talk about Ray. Her Ray. The love of her life who wouldn't talk to her. He appeared to be having as miserable a time of it as she was.

She tried calling him again this morning and both times it went to voicemail. She didn't have a choice but to leave more pleading messages for him to call her back. How could she make amends if he didn't even want to talk to her?

"By the way, Faye," Jessa said, interrupting her thoughts. "Elena saw you last night. She was in the same restaurant as you."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah. She said you were with a guy. Does he have something to do with you being this low?"

"Sort of," she responded. Should she tell her friends about Ray? How would it affect their working relationship with him, especially since things had soured between the two of them?

"Was it John you were with?" Jessa prodded in a soft voice. "Elena said you looked sweet with the guy. You were caressing his face or something."
 

Faye glanced at Jessa with a horrified look. "When did she say that?"

"This morning, in the kitchen," her friend responded, frowning at her reaction.

"Did anyone else hear?" she whispered.

"Just me and Ray. No one else was around."

Faye covered her face in mortification.

"What's wrong?"

"That was Steve I was with last night."

"What?" three different voices exclaimed.

"Are you back together?"

"What's he doing in Sydney?"

"He's here for three weeks because of work. He wanted us to get back together but I said no. What Elena saw was me breaking it to him gently. I'm not back with him."

Tears started falling down her face. No wonder Ray didn't pick up her calls. She could only guess how hurt and angry he must have felt.

"It's okay, honey," Clarise crooned, rubbing her arm.

"He didn't want me to see Steve. But I told him he didn't have the right to say that because we're not in an exclusive relationship, that we can still see other people."

"Who? John?"

She nodded her head, wiping her eyes and nose with her tissue.

"He said he couldn't be with me because that's not what he wants, so he walked out on me. But I realised I love him and there's no one else I'd rather be with."

"Then you could explain that to him, couldn't you?" Victor suggested.

"He doesn't want to talk to me. And now he must be thinking I'm back with Steve - caressing his face. Oh God!"

"Hang on a second," Jessa interjected, her eyes round like saucers, "Is John … Ray?"

Faye lifted her tear-stained face, took a deep breath and nodded.

Her friends gaped at her in stunned silence.

"Since when have you two been going out?" Victor asked.

"Since I've been talking to you about John."

"So everything you told us about John was really about Ray?"

"Yes."

"Then you must be Jane."

She smiled. "Yes."

"We had no idea," Clarise said, bewildered.

"I know. I'm sorry, guys. I just didn't want you to get caught up in whatever drama we happen to have. You work for him and I don't want the negativities of our relationship to touch you."

She looked at each of them imploringly. "Now that you know, please don't let this affect your relationship with Ray, no matter what happens between the two of us."

"Of course not, Faye. You don't have to worry about us," Jessa declared. "We will be professional when we need to be and we know Ray will be, too. And you don't need to worry that you kept it from us in the beginning. There are things you need to keep to yourself sometimes. You don't need to tell us
everything
."

Faye smiled through her tears. "I love you, guys. Thank you."

"We love you, too, Faye. And when you want some space and privacy, all you need to do is tell us," Clarise added.

She nodded, feeling somewhat better that her friends now knew the truth. But she was still sick to her stomach that Ray was ignoring her.

She looked at her watch. "He'd be on his way to the airport by now, wouldn't he?"

The other three checked the time and nodded.

"He's back at work next Monday," Victor advised.

"I know," she responded with a bittersweet smile.

"Is there anything you want us to do?"

"No. I'll talk to him and explain everything. I just hope he still wants me."

"After pining for you for over a year, I doubt he could let go that easily."

"I hope you're right. But I think I hurt him really badly."

CHAPTER ELEVEN

"Hi, Ray, good to have you back."

Ray looked up from the paperwork on his desk and smiled at Clarise. "Thanks."

"How was Brisbane? Did you have a good conference?"