Remember Me (23 page)

I walked over and hugged my father, trying to remember the last time he’d ever said anything nice to me. After the past few months it was so comforting having his support. I needed all of the help that I was going to get.

It took my dad one phone call to find out that the protective order was never filed. We weren’t sure who he’d called to draw it up, but there was no record of Mr. Tilly filing one, or me having one in my name. Just knowing that made me want to drive to his house and beat the shit out of him.

For the man to go to those extremes told me that there was a reason he didn’t want me around Ashley and it wasn’t just because he didn’t think I was good for her.
I had this feeling in the pit of my stomach that he was afraid one day she was going to remember something and he didn’t want his secret getting out.

Things between my father and I progressed. It was slow, but we were making constant progress. More than anything, he was on my side, doing whatever had to be done for me to get the twins back. He’d called his lawyer and even had a couple meetings with a social worker that dealt with custody with non-related people, like
friends of the family.

While we were working on our problems, my brother was distanci
ng himself from the family. He’d chose to come out with the truth, but wasn’t prepared for the consequences that it would entail. He wanted nothing to do with the twins, and now nothing to do with his own family.

My mother was a mess over it. I’d gone to their house for dinner one night and she’d broke down, crying that she’d failed the twins. I knew she was talking about my brother and sister, but didn’t see why she felt that way. Sure, Peyton was hardheaded, but her heart was
always in the right place. She might not have gone off to college, but she was the baby of the family and none of us ever saw her becoming a doctor. She’d always been the kind of woman that was meant to settle down and be a mother herself.

I’d spoke to Peyton a couple times, but she still hadn’t moved her stuff back in my house. My sister never liked drama, so I figured when things started going wrong with her and Jamey’s relationship again, she’d be banging on my door. It was fine by me, considering I’d do anything for
my siblings. Peyton was still young and she had so much growing up and learning to do. If she was anything like me, it was going to take her a while.

Ford kept his promise, coming over as much as he could to help me finish the house. We spent an entire weekend installing new siding and that following weekend my dad came over to repair the old front porch. Though very old, the house looked b
rand new from the outside and just the same on the inside. I’d worked hard with the focus of bringing my family home, and now that it was finished I was hopeful that one day the house would be full again with the three people that meant the most to me.

I had to keep fighting for them, no matter how long, or how hard it got. I wasn’t going to give up, not when I’d come so far.

That’s why it only took me a few days before I started visiting Ashley at the new rehabilitation center. I knew her father didn’t show up during the day, so I went then. I really thought that I’d be on some list keeping me from seeing her, but nobody said a word to me. When her mother showed up, I could have sworn she’d call Ash’s dad or the police. Instead she walked away, leaving me there alone with my woman.

I won’t forget the day he showed up when I was there. He turned, right away, trying to
notify someone, and I called his name. “Mr. Tilly, you might want to rethink that decision on account of the falsified documents you had me served with.”

He froze in place and said nothing in his defense.

“The way I see it is that you can go ahead and call someone to remove me, but I can in turn take my fake papers to a judge and have your title removed, probably immediately. Now, I don’t know what you’re scared of me findin’ out, but you sure as hell ain’t goin’ to keep me away from my family, not now, and not ever.”

He walked out, never saying a single thing to me. I couldn’t believe it. He was supposed to be a well-respected government official. I knew Ash had no clue what was going on, but I sure as shit was going to fill her in whenever was ready to hear it.

It still hurt me so much being around and her not knowing me, but I knew she wouldn’t want me giving up. Each time I visited I had hope when I arrived and left broken hearted.

As my hope continued to test me I stayed resolved to the fact that time healed all wounds.
I knew she may never be who she was before, but it didn’t matter to me. I was going to love whoever she was, because that’s what love was all about.

Chapter 29

Shayne

Ashley had been at the rehabilitation facility for one month and she was maki
ng progress every day. After three weeks there she was trying to feed herself and beginning to say small broken words. Her motor skills were improving and they were already talking to her about working on standing up.

I was so proud of her, and brought her gifts each night after work. Though confused about my visits, I started bringing her pictures of the tw
o of us together. It all began when I showed her a picture from my phone. I did my best to show her pictures of only her face, so she wouldn’t get herself upset about seeing a pregnant belly.

At first she didn’t seem excited to see me, but I refused to give up.

Her father barely came to visit her and I hadn’t seen the twins since they’d taken them from me. I’d finally met with a lawyer that told me my options were very limited. Aside from a birth certificate that falsified information, I had no feasible link to the kids that would oversee their biological grandparents.

I did try to see them once a week. I’d wake up early on Saturdays and head over to their house. Each day they’d tell me to leave their property. I think sometimes I wished they’d answer the door holding one of them, but it
never happened. Then I wondered if they’d hired a nanny and if they even paid attention to them. My heart ached to have them back in my arms, but like Ford had told me, I had to be patient.

During her second month in rehab I noticed a huge change. When I walked in the door to visit she’d address me by my name and smile. She’d let me kiss her on the cheek when I got there and sometimes when I left. Her speech was improvi
ng and sometimes she would amaze me.

One particular visit she really shocked me. She’d been working hard learning to write again. It was going slowly, but she’d managed to write enough to want to show me. On a piece of paper she’d written my name. I know it w
asn’t much, but it meant everything to me. I think that’s why the words slipped out so easily. “I’m so proud of you, baby. I love you so much.”

Her eyes widened and I could tell she was utterly shocked. Even though she sometimes spoke, she said nothing.

I freaked out, not knowing what to do, so I left the room. When I’d calmed down and went to walk back inside I found her crying. I sat down beside her and went to touch her cheek, but she moved away.

I felt so rejected, like everything I’d been doing had turned out to be a waste. It was a difficult moment to have to deal with.

I stayed away for four days before I could bring myself to face her again. I didn’t know if it was the drugs or if she really didn’t remember, but Ash acted like nothing had happened.

I decided at that moment that I had to be careful, but Ash wasn’t going to let me. I’d no sooner walked into the room when she gave me more reasons to strive for
her to regain her memory. “Shayne … I … missed … you.” It took her an extremely long time to get more than one word out at a time.

Hesitantly, I walked over and kissed her cheek. “I missed you, too.”

“I … remembered … somethin’.” She spoke slowly, braking in between words.

Every time she said anything,
I felt myself getting choked up. Her progress, though slow, amazed me. “What did you remember?” Silently I was begging that it would be our life together.

“I
… remember … living … together.”

I had to remain calm. For months I’d waited for this moment and I couldn’t get excited in case it was just a momentary memory and nothing more. “You did?”

“Did … we … live … together?”

“Yeah, we did.”

“I … don’t … understand.” She started to cry and I felt horrible for her.

I’m
not sure why I thought it was a good idea, but I pulled out my phone and found my favorite shot of the two of us. My hands were shaking and all I could think about was that moment when I thought she was going to die. I remembered wanting to die without her, feeling like I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t hold it in any longer. She had to know why I visited every day. She had to know that I wasn’t going to stop until we were together again.

I h
anded her the phone and felt tears running down my face. This was a do or die situation. She could have thrown it across the room, or even told me to never come back again, but instead she stared right at it, tracing our faces with her fingers. “Ash, I - ”

She looked right at me. “My
… babies. Shayne, … my … babies. No! No! Shayne!” she kept repeating it until the nurse rushed in to see what was the matter.

I grabbed her hand and forced her to look me in the eyes. She remembered them and even though it was a huge ordeal, she still had a long way to go. “Calm down, Ash. The twins are okay. I promise you that they’re fine.”

I had to take the nurse into the hallway and explain what had happened. She actually seemed thrilled that Ash had such a breakthrough.

When I went back into the room she was crying harder. We’d explained plenty of times why she was in the hospital, and she understood that there was a part of her life that she couldn’t remember, but I wondered how this would affect her.
Obviously she’d want to see them and I had to find a way to make it happen.

“Shayne, please
… help … me. Beka … Eli ... Where are they?”

I wiped away her tears. “I can’t believe you remembered.”

“The … picture. I … was … pregnant. You … got … me … chocolate … cake,” she paused for a second, “and … we … ate … it … in … bed.”

I freaking lost it. My lips pressed against hers and we cried together. “I missed you so much, Ash. I thought I lost you.”

When I pulled away she wiped my face. “Don’t … cry.”

I brought her hand up to my lips and kissed it. “I’m just happy, that’s all.”

“So … confusing, but … I … remember. I … remember … the … twins … and … I … remember … that … I … love … you.”

Words could not describe what I was feeling. It was as if someone had jumpstarted my heart again. Every emotion that I could have was rushing into my
mind all at once. “I thought I’d never hear that again. I’m sorry for cryin’, but I’m just so happy, Ash. This made it all worth it. I’ve spent the last several months wondering how I was going to live my life without you. Baby, I don’t care how long it takes. I don’t care how many months we have to wait to get you home. None of that matters as long as I know it’s going to happen. I missed you so damn much.”

I’d never done it before, but that night I slept at the rehab center in a chair next to Ash’s bed. We held hands and talked, as much as she could physically take before she got worn out. She’d looked at every picture on my phone and asked repeatedly about the twins. My heart ached for her wanting to see her children and I didn’t waste any time making sure it happened that next day.

I showed up at their house at seven the next morning. After beating on the door several times, I walked around the back and saw them sitting in the kitchen. Sure enough an older lady was attending to the twins. Right away it pissed me off.

I ban
ged on the glass, demanding someone to open the door.

The old woman
obliged and moved to the side as I burst in and picked up Beka. “Where’s Mr. Tilly?”

“He’s out of town.”

“Mrs. Tilly?”

“She’s upstairs.”

I ran up the stairs, skipping some to get me there faster. She came out while fastening her earring and seemed shocked to see me standing there. “Shayne, what are you doing here?”

“She remembered. She remembers her kids and I’m taking them to see her.” I pointed right at her. “How long have you known she was regaining her memories?”

“The therapist said she was having flashes a couple weeks ago.”

“So you stopped visiting? What kind of parent does that?”

“Shayne, you don’t understand.”

“It doesn’t matter what I think. It’s about Ashley and what she needed.” I shook my
head and started walking back down the stairs. “I’m takin’ my kids to see their mother. If you attempt to call the cops or make trouble for me, you’ll have to deal with their mother this time.”

She said nothing else. In fact I never even noticed her after that.

The nanny was nice and I gave her the short version of what had happened. She assisted me with getting their bags together and helped me carry their seats and fasten them in the car. She even offered to go with me, but this was a reunion for the four of us.