River: A Novel (38 page)

 That statement
reminded me with a jolt. “Mace has my… has Marcus and Valeria. He knows I have
my voice, Asher. He thinks that Marcus didn’t mute me because I’m his daughter.”
My voice squeaked a little. “We have to get them out before Mace kills them.” I
clutched his elbow, starting to scramble up.

 Asher held
me back without much effort. “Elodie, we have to wait for the guard to change
again,” he said softly. “Three hours and twenty-three minutes. Please try to
calm down and rest. We’ve got a long way to go.” I stopped midway up and did
what he said, wanting him to stay safe. “Besides,” he continued in a reluctant whisper,
“I’m… not so sure we can help them.”

 I sat bolt upright,
shocked. He must’ve registered my reaction because his arms untethered
themselves from me. “We have to,” I said in more of a stubborn way than I
meant. Clearing my throat, I reminded myself that Asher had already risked his
life to save nobody-me, and that in his mind Marcus was most likely still the
enemy. Just thinking of Mace made me lose composure. “They’re in trouble
because of me, because I can talk. Marcus didn’t do this. It’s not his fault
that I woke up here. He was just trying to protect us. And Mace said that he
was going to
execute
Valeria—” I began to pant, edging back to the hysterical
ledge, unable to stop myself.

 “Elodie,
I’m sorry,” he apologized cautiously before placing his arms around me again,
hesitating at first, and then drawing me close. “I’ll see if I can find them after
getting you out first. Please, believe me.” His pleading was so genuine,
resting his forehead against mine, that there was no possible way I could blame
this soul for anything the Speakers had done. 

 After
taking a second to calm down, to let his words sink in, I couldn’t stop my
hands from finding his neck, couldn’t stop my lips from whispering, “Of course
I believe you,” before I drew back for a second. “But I will be right there
with you, none of this ‘getting me out first’ crap.” I looked for his eyes within
the inky space. Of course, I could only visualize his tightened stare and
pursed lips.

 “You don’t
make anything easy, do you?” he asked after a moment, in a sarcastic hum.

 “No, I
really don’t,” I sighed wearily as his arms tightened. 

 Even though
I couldn’t see him, just being near him made me feel so much stronger, once I
overlooked my incredible exhaustion. “Hey, can I ask you something?” Speaking
into his shirt, I was hardly able to hear my own question.

  “Hmm?” He
sounded distracted.

 “Did you
bring any coffee?”

 He chuckled
despite our dire situation. “Sorry, I was in a bit of a hurry. All I’ve got on
me is anti-Lull.”

 “Oh,
bless
you
,” I croaked brokenly.

 While I
attempted to find Asher’s pockets, he gently relocated my hands out of wherever
they were on him. “Elodie,” he murmured with unending patience, “try to sleep
for the moment. We’ve got hours left before we can move. I’ll wake you up.” And
then he kissed my fingertips.

 All thought
of an anti-Lull fix flew from my head, and I found a spot on his shoulder to
rest. I didn’t realize just then that I had been trembling uncontrollably. “I’m
so glad you’re here. Have I mentioned that?”

 He laughed
quietly, and his lips touched my ear. “I’m glad I’m here, too. I’m so…
relieved
that I found you before—” He took a deep breath. A warm current went through me
when he sighed, “That you are okay.” I smiled without thinking, lifting my head
until I felt his stubble against my face, to kiss his cheek. 

 “Thank you
for finding me,” I whispered into his skin, ignoring the knowledge that Mace
was planning to do something horrible to me.

 I laid my
head back on his shoulder, noticing as he swallowed that he was taking several
deep breaths. Closing my eyes, I moved in a little closer to brush my cheek
against his neck, bracing my hand around the back of his head. I just wanted to
be as near to him as possible. It was the safest place in the world I could
imagine to be.

 Asher’s
breathing hadn’t slowed down, and I felt my own matching his. We were very
still, though, in this complete darkness. Prisoners. And yet, if the guard
didn’t change, if Mace never returned for me and left us here to perish, I was
pretty sure I would be okay with that.

 After an
immeasurable moment, Asher took a very deep breath and seemed to straighten a
bit. “Elodie, you should really try to sleep. You’ll feel better, and I don’t
know when you’ll get another chance.” His voice was very steady. His breathing had
become low and even. “Besides, the anti-Lull will work better.” Very practical,
too.

 “I’ll try,”
I said doubtfully, taking my hands back and settling them on his chest. With
his arm securely around me, I pressed my head low on his shoulder. When I
closed my eyes, the black turned to steel-gray with flecks of light blue, the
exact color of Asher’s irises just before dawn.

..................

My eyes were
opened so wide that it was painful. I couldn’t get away from him. He laughed as
if he could see me, that my escape attempt was a joke. Holding my breath, I crept
along the wall as silently as possible. There was no light, not an apparition
to guide me out of this hell. My heart beat so brutally that it made me choke.
What
do I
do?
My mind blanked while I frantically listened to which way
his footsteps were going; they echoed in my direction, and I scurried along the
wall, crying out when his hand raked my back, like the claws of a beast
scraping through layers of my skin, infecting me. After sprinting to the middle
of the room, I turned in a circle, and then whipped my body backward, away from
him. His laughter proved he wasn’t worried about his prey getting away. When I
found a corner to hide in, I heard it. The music matched his muffled sniggering,
low and threatening. I felt ill as the fight left my body, tears rolling down
my face.

 “Elodie,” a
nervous whisper was in my ear. “Wake up.” Warm fingers were cradling my head,
and I heard a high whimper. It took me a moment to match the sound to the
vibrations coming from my throat. I panted and opened my eyes to nothing. It
was as dark as it had been in my dream, except the atmosphere became very different.
There was still fear and blackness, but not the pulse-pounding terror that had
been my nightmare. My cheeks were wet and cold as Asher wiped them dry.

 “Asher,” I huffed
out, and then I heard him sigh. “Sorry, I had a horrible dream.”

 “I guessed
as much,” he murmured and helped me sit up. “Are you all right?”

 Nodding my
head, though afterward I realized he couldn’t see, I was unable to speak again.
The dream had been so awful that I couldn’t shake it.

 “Elodie,
are you okay, really?” He sounded so worried that I cleared my throat to tell
him I was—now that I was awake. My mouth was completely dry, though, and I had
to swallow a couple of times. The length of my pause must have been making Asher
a little crazy because he began shaking me slightly.

 I placed my
hands over his. “Yes, I’m okay, really,” my throat rasped out while I tried to
make sense of the nightmare. I had dreamed of Mace in the Dark Room, but it was
as if I were looking through a camera lens of memory, though not exactly my own.
“What do they do to people in these rooms?” I barely whispered, still feeling
shaky.

 “I know
this is horrid, I can’t wait to get you out of here.” Asher pressed his lips
against my palm, and then wrapped his arms around me. I had the distinct
feeling he was evading my question when he answered, “Just over an hour left.” 

 “As long as
you stay with me, I’ll be fine,” I said. I draped my arms around him, feeling more
exhausted than before. “So, I slept for about an hour?” 

 “Yes, you
started thrashing and crying just before I woke you.”

 I tried to
stop thinking about the dream. It had just been so real. After a few silent
minutes, I felt the need to tell Asher about it. Clearing my throat, I tensed
before I spoke; positive he would assume I was crazy. “Asher, I think I’ve been
here before.”

 His arms
went rigid. “Oh?”

 “I’m not
sure, of course, because I don’t remember anything about River. But in my dream,
I was in this room or something like it. And Mace was chasing me.” I had to pause
as tears threatened again, feeling weak and pathetic. It was just a dream,
after all.

 “I think he
wanted to… I don’t know, maybe try to rape me, but I ran—” I had to stop again.
Talking about it was making it worse in some ways, more real. Asher didn’t say
anything while his arms tightened almost completely around me, closer than we
had ever been. It made me feel better. Solid. 

 “Then the
really weird thing happened.” I took a deep breath, trying to think of the best
way to describe it. “He played some music, and then I couldn’t run. It was as
if I didn’t have control over my body…” I couldn’t go on. Even though Asher had
woken me at that point, I knew what was going to happen next in the nightmare.

 “You’re all
right now, Elodie. I’ll get you out of here,” he whispered, trying to soothe
me, his fingers trailing long lines up and down my arm. I wasn’t crying anymore,
but I shook a little.

 “Could it
have really happened?” The words were broken coming from my sandpaper throat. After
a moment of quiet, I began to get suspicious. “What aren’t you telling me?” 

 “I think,
maybe you or someone close to you was here, in the Domain. That is one of the
things that happen… in these rooms.”

 I felt
sick. “
Why
?”

 “I’m not
sure if you know this, or remember, but the reason I thought you were an
anomaly is because there are no women Speakers,” he said evenly.

 I honestly
had no response. This place got more bizarre by the moment. “So, how do they…?”
I trailed off, not exactly knowing how to phrase my question.

 “The
Speakers take Mutes as mothers. It’s a hierarchy, so they get to pick and
choose them. Some women go eagerly, as if it were a great honor,” he huffed. “It’s
not their fault that they think like that, the truly brainwashed. They are
invited to the Domain and courted by royalty, after all. The Speakers have huge
parties in their honor. Then if the woman does have a child, a boy, that child
is usually kept to be brought up as a Speaker. The mother can see him
periodically, but he is always taught that he is better than everyone else,
including her.”

 “Wow. That
is seriously backward. And twisted,” I sputtered. “What if the baby is a girl?”

 “She is muted
and left with the mother. They allow a few lines of non-royal men to procreate.
We Caravs try to hide our male children very carefully, to make the Speakers
think they had decided their fate. They’ve honed this ‘system’ for three
generations now.” 

 “Why the
Dark Rooms?” I asked tentatively, almost hoping he would revert to his silence
again, but a part of me just couldn’t let it go.

 “Some of
the Speakers, Mace for instance,” he growled under his breath, “like to play
games.” Asher seemed to have to calm down for a second. Then I heard his
breathing return to normal and felt his arms relax. “They like a challenge, or
the semblance of one—the girl never gets away.” He rubbed my back for a moment,
as if he needed to be soothed as well. After a long pause, he spoke more to
himself than to me. “Danny didn’t know what the Speakers wanted the music for. He
was tricked, surely. He wouldn’t have done it if he’d known—if they hadn’t
forced him.”

 “Music?” 

 “There are compositions
the Speakers use to make women more… pliable.”

 “Oh,” I
whispered. The music from my dream cut through my memory, unwelcome in the
darkness, inescapable. Low and menacing, it matched the animalistic cadence of
Mace’s laugh. A numbing shock pulsed through me from the idea of the Speakers
using Dan’s compositions to force people into doing things other than being
lulled, which was bad enough. Dan must have been under duress, some kind of
blackmail. The Speakers probably held something, or someone, over his head for
him to do such a thing, just as Asher said. I felt sturdy arms wrap around me
and gasped at a sudden sharp pain in my side. Other aches and cuts began to throb
as well.

 Asher’s
arms automatically loosened. “Where does it hurt?”

 “My rib.”

 “It may be
fractured or bruised.” He placed his hand on the side of my face, whispering
into my ear. “I will never let him near you again,” he promised.

 Mashing my
dry lips together, I tried to get the tune from the dream out of my head as Mace’s
laugh snaked in between notes. I could only block it out while leaning against Asher;
still unable to comprehend he was trapped in here with me. Thinking of his
stow-away trick on the tram and break-in to the Domain, I began to feel anxious
again. My earlier issues slowly built into exasperation. What had he done?

 Sitting up
straight, I faced his direction, feeling his own blind eyes on me. I scrunched
my lips together and tried to calm down so as not to sound ungrateful while
chiding him.