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Authors: Neil Strauss

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When you're finished, read the paragraph once more. This time, imagine you're recording a book on tape for children. Compare this new version to your original version—and discover the great storyteller lurking inside you.

PROBLEM: Statements that Sound like Questions

SOLUTION:
Sit down, pull out your trusty recorder, and place it in front of you.

For your final vocal exercise, imagine that the audio recorder is your friend. And this friend of yours doesn't like fish. Your goal is to convince him to try sushi with you tonight.

When you're finished, play back the recording. Listen carefully. Does your voice rise in pitch at the end of any declarative sentences?

If it does, you'll notice that your statements sound like questions. And that makes you seem unsure of yourself.

Persuasive speakers end their sentences—and their argument—conclusively.

If your statements end in a higher pitch than they started, record the same speech again. This time, be firm. Instead of asking questions that beg for affirmation, make definitive statements that demonstrate your conviction. And make sure that the speech itself doesn't trail off into extraneous blather and repetition but instead comes to a definite and powerful conclusion. Sound like you know what you're talking about and believe every word you say. Even if you don't happen to like sushi.

When you have this mastered, you're done.

Congratulations.

However, just because you were able to identify and correct these five major vocal mistakes today doesn't mean the problem is solved for good. Revisit these exercises twice a week. And whenever you're in conversation, monitor your posture, breathing, and speech. If you catch yourself backsliding, correct yourself immediately. Before long, you'll not only have women hanging on your every word, you'll have your own radio talk show.

MISSION 1:
Hit the Showers

As soon as you wake up, put on your favorite upbeat music and play it loud. Shower, shampoo, and soap thoroughly. Wash twice if you want. And … don't masturbate today, if you're prone to doing so.

Put something scented on your body: moisturizer, talcum powder, or a light spritz of cologne. Gargle with mouthwash. Whatever makes you feel and smell good.

Then shave your face clean (preserving any preexisting mustache, beard, or goatee). Make sure you shave or tweeze any stray places where you sprout hair—your ears, nostrils, the back of your neck.

Put on clean, well-fitting clothing. You should feel like a million dollars.

Now look at yourself in the mirror and read the following to yourself:

“You are amazing. People love you and respect you. You radiate charisma, charm, and grace. You stand out from everyone around you. Talking to you is a privilege. And you deserve the best the world has to offer. It's all there out there, waiting for you.”

Read it as many times as it takes—say it out loud if you have to—until you truly feel and embody it.

Now hold on to that feeling…

MISSION 2:
Ask an Expert

What you experienced in the previous mission is a simple ritual that helps many men enter a state of increased confidence, positivity, and unassailability Take a moment to develop your own ritual to pump yourself up before going out to meet women. It may involve exercising, cleaning, repeating affirmations,
reading something inspirational, replaying previous successes in your mind, blasting your favorite music, singing, showering, dancing, calling someone who makes you laugh, or any combination of the above.

This is the first day you're going to meet women you could possibly date. You should make these approaches at the earliest possible opportunity after leaving the house clean, well shaven, and feeling good about yourself.

Your mission: Ask three women to recommend a cool local clothing store that carries menswear. Your mission is complete once you've approached three women
and
received one clothing store recommendation. (In other words, if you approach three women and you get a clothing store suggestion, you're done. If you approach three women and you don't get a clothing store recommendation, keep asking until you do.)

When you get a recommendation, write down the name of the store, and the location if she knows it. Make sure you keep the name and location handy.

Here are a few tips:

Approach women who seem like they live in town and have a cool sense of style.

If you're talking to people in the street, don't approach them from behind, which can be startling. Either approach them from the front, or walk ahead of them and turn your head back over your shoulder as you keep walking. They'll feel even more comfortable if you increase the distance as you walk, as if you have somewhere to be. You may also approach in cafés, shopping malls, or wherever you're comfortable.

Be aware that only about 1 in 3 women will be able to think of a store right away. Some people go blank when put on the spot.

As soon as she answers, even if it's just to say “I don't know,” you've made your approach. Tell her “Thanks for your help” (or “Thanks anyway” if she doesn't have any ideas) and leave if you want. Or continue the interaction. The choice is yours.

Good luck.

MISSION 3:
Stand Up Straight

Before you even open your mouth, a woman has formed an initial impression of you. And that impression is based largely on your body language. Today you're going to learn to carry yourself with confidence through a simple posture exercise known as the wall stance.

Stand with your back against a wall. Make sure your heels, butt, and shoulders are touching the wall. In addition, the back of your head just above the level of your chin should be against the wall.

Remain in this position for a minute. Reach behind your back and check to make sure there isn't too much space between your lower back and the wall. If there is, tighten your abdomen to bring the small of your back closer to the wall.

Now move away from the wall, and walk around the room for a minute without changing your posture. Commit the position and alignment of your body to memory.

Repeat this exercise one more time today and, if possible, once a day throughout the Challenge. From now on, check your posture on a regular basis, and bring yourself into alignment if you catch yourself slouching.

Because posture is key not just to your confidence and appearance but also to your health, I've prepared an extra-credit video tutorial for you online at www.stylelife.com/challenge. It provides the basics on Alexander Technique, a school of movement that improves not just the way you stand, walk, and sit but also the way you speak and feel about yourself.

MISSION 1:
Here Comes the Groom

Today is grooming day, and the focus is your appearance.

When men discuss attraction skills, they often act as if looks are the only variable out of their control, perhaps because they feel that appearance is genetic. Not true.

Just as any girl can slim down, get breast implants, and dye her hair blonde to turn heads, any guy can become good looking. In the same way you can learn openers, routines, and confidence, you can learn looks. No matter how you're perceived right now, if you're willing to make a few changes, you can be considered good looking.

I've taken worst-case scenarios—fat, balding, acne-plagued guys in Coke bottle glasses—and through the miracles of tanning, contacts, head shaving, dermatology, health clubs, and menswear, turned them into cool, good-looking men who exude confidence and power.

Now it's your turn.

Your assignment is to read the grooming checklist in your Day 5 Briefing. Then perform at least one task on the checklist. Not all the suggestions will apply to you, so choose one from the area in which you're most deficient.

If you have a trustworthy female friend, ask her: “If you had to pick one thing to change about the way I groom myself, what would it be?” Let her know you'd sincerely appreciate an honest, constructive answer—and make sure you don't take it personally when she gives you one.

MISSION 2:
Make a Change

The first step to better looks is better grooming. The second is committing to the right style.

Ideally, you want your style and clothing to convey that you belong to one of three segments of society: the same niche, group, or tribe that the woman you're interested in belongs to; a tribe she wants to belong to; or a tribe she wants to visit. For example, men in dirty oversized undershirts and ill-fitting khaki shorts belong to few women's tribes, while pierced, tattooed rock stars belong to a tribe that most women at least want to visit.

BOOK: Rules of the Game
13.05Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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